Cold approach in fitness class

[Barrister]

Do you DJs go for awhile before asking out on the date? Went for first time to a yoga class tonight and it was small. Myself and 4 chicks. One chick was a HB 8.5 and the other was a HB 7.5. Would love to approach either but they both bolted like immediately right when the class ended.

I didn’t want to approach necessarily on class 1 since I think they are regulars and it was my first one tonight. I assume building some rapport before asking out in this setting is best or does it make sense to go straight for the kill and ask them out in the first good conversation you get with them?

I did speak to the instructor for awhile tonight after class. She’s a bit older but figured it would help for social proof if she and I are friendly and the others see that.

 

[2Rocky]

Basic Chit chat and get to know her name.

I hate seeing guys try to approach women in the gym. Do it in the lobby or parking lot away from the gym floor. If she IS interested she will make herself available to approach. Don't ambush her on her way to the car. The best social proof is if a group is going for a meal or a drink after.

But seriously don't ask chicks out on the gym floor. That is a workspace.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Just chat to everyone in a friendly way and it should become apparent who is interested. She will linger in conversation with you and smile with “that” smile when she sees you. Then go in for the kill.

 

[Barrister]

My opinion:

Gym classes are misandric. The club music, the feminine equipment, socializing atmosphere, etc. all convey that such classes are for WOMEN only.

They know (or they THINK they know) that you're there to meet women. Most men don't do yoga.

You're intruding on the ladies' social hour.

You're like the hunter scaring away the deer, because women spook easily.

If you're gonna use the gym to meet women then it's best to be out on the gym floor, head down, busting ass lifting weights.

Or attend more "masculine" classes.

This is a yoga studio not the gym -- and I actually enjoy doing yoga in general. I know a couple of people though that have met and begun dating from going to yoga. I do take your point though. I actually have a gym in my apartment complex where I generally go to lift.

While there certainly is a differing ratio when it comes to men vs. women at the yoga studio I have struck up friendly convos with a number of the women there. I will say the really hot ones I am interested in have bolted quickly out before I could strike up the conversation though.

 

[Barrister]

Basic Chit chat and get to know her name.

I hate seeing guys try to approach women in the gym. Do it in the lobby or parking lot away from the gym floor. If she IS interested she will make herself available to approach. Don't ambush her on her way to the car. The best social proof is if a group is going for a meal or a drink after.

But seriously don't ask chicks out on the gym floor. That is a workspace.

Good point on where to actually do the approach. It sounds like this might be a process but I actually am fine with that. Like I said I enjoy doing the yoga irrespective of approaching women. However, I would say these women are much more attractive than what I typically run into -- hence why I am interested.

 

[Barrister]

Just chat to everyone in a friendly way and it should become apparent who is interested. She will linger in conversation with you and smile with “that” smile when she sees you. Then go in for the kill.

This is my biggest problem with cold approach in general is I have had the idea of avoiding the friendzone drilled into my head so much that I think I typically ask out too soon rather than build rapport first and letting them warm up to you beforehand. I don't want to come off like the creep at the studio who just started coming and has asked out 2-3 women in the first month of being there. I know that wouldn't be good.

 

[TheProspect]

I am certified as a yoga instructor and I teach classes weekly at a few different yoga studios. 95%+ of clients are female.

Do not start taking classes with the intention of picking up girls. Go because you actually want to do yoga. After you’ve become a familiar face over an extended period of time and have built rapport, then things can change.

Many women do take their yoga studio as a safe place and it really is a ladies social hour as @Espi put it.

Trust me when I say that girls taking classes, and the instructor teaching it, can figure out pretty quickly what a guy’s intentions are. Even if you do actually like yoga, but simultaneously have secondary ambitions to pick up chicks, we will know. Energy and vibes really affect the atmosphere at a studio, and regulars & instructors can tell when somethings off.

Even as an instructor, I had to build comfort and rapport. That took time. Girls eventually saw that I was there to teach yoga because I love yoga and I take my own practice seriously. My classes are the most booked now, but it took awhile to develop that positive reputation after consistently conveying good intentions.

And also trust me, any girl who goes to yoga and takes it seriously isn’t going to be genuinely receptive to a new guy hitting on her, even if she comes off that way in the moment. She may be act nice and might even give you her number, but you can bet she’ll tell other girls and the instructor about you in an unflattering light. And on the off chance you do successfully pull as a new member, the quality of the chick is questionable at best, and she is likely very emotionally damaged.

My opinion would be to just regularly attend classes for awhile and don’t try to strike up a conversation (beyond “hi” / “bye”) before or after class unless they initiate. Demonstrate that you’re there for yoga and not chicks. Over time, as the regulars and instructors grow comfortable with your presence, you can gradually interact more with others and begin to build rapport and even develop a social circle. As a new member, don’t bite too fast on any chick who seems interested, it could potentially ruin your reputation and hurt your chances of creating comfort at the studio, and thus, developing a social circle down the line. Ultimately, that would be an ideal situation — a social circle of hot women that gives you instant social proof. Play the long-term game.

Hope my insider perspective provides you with some useful insight.

 

[Barrister]

I am certified as a yoga instructor and I teach classes weekly at a few different yoga studios. 95%+ of clients are female.

Do not start taking classes with the intention of picking up girls. Go because you actually want to do yoga. After you’ve become a familiar face over an extended period of time and have built rapport, then things can change.

Many women do take their yoga studio as a safe place and it really is a ladies social hour as @Espi put it.

Trust me when I say that girls taking classes, and the instructor teaching it, can figure out pretty quickly what a guy’s intentions are. Even if you do actually like yoga, but simultaneously have secondary ambitions to pick up chicks, we will know. Energy and vibes really affect the atmosphere at a studio, and regulars & instructors can tell when somethings off.

Even as an instructor, I had to build comfort and rapport. That took time. Girls eventually saw that I was there to teach yoga because I love yoga and I take my own practice seriously. My classes are the most booked now, but it took awhile to develop that positive reputation after consistently conveying good intentions.

And also trust me, any girl who goes to yoga and takes it seriously isn’t going to be genuinely receptive to a new guy hitting on her, even if she comes off that way in the moment. She may be act nice and might even give you her number, but you can bet she’ll tell other girls and the instructor about you in an unflattering light. And on the off chance you do successfully pull as a new member, the quality of the chick is questionable at best, and she is likely very emotionally damaged.

My opinion would be to just regularly attend classes for awhile and don’t try to strike up a conversation (beyond “hi” / “bye”) before or after class unless they initiate. Demonstrate that you’re there for yoga and not chicks. Over time, as the regulars and instructors grow comfortable with your presence, you can gradually interact more with others and begin to build rapport and even develop a social circle. As a new member, don’t bite too fast on any chick who seems interested, it could potentially ruin your reputation and hurt your chances of creating comfort at the studio, and thus, developing a social circle down the line. Ultimately, that would be an ideal situation — a social circle of hot women that gives you instant social proof. Play the long-term game.

Hope my insider perspective provides you with some useful insight.

It does help to put it into perspective and I appreciate that. I enjoy doing yoga even though I know there is a huge disparity between the sexes on who does it. I am historically very in shape but very inflexible and the yoga has helped me get more flexible and feel better. I will take your advice to treat this as more of a social proofing than anything and something that will take time (if anything comes out of it) and leave my hardcore pursuits for outside the studio.

 

[f(x)]

Follow TheProspect’s advice.

I’ve been practicing various forms of yoga at home for about ten years now, but when I do go to a studio I sit in the front row near the instructor.

This way everyone can see me and they’re more comfortable knowing I’m not in the back being a creep.

Yoga is great, especially if you play sports. I’m considering teacher certification after things return to normal.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Do not approach. There will be one chick in the class that likes you. She WILL let you know. She will also torpedo your chance with any other girl in the group.

Best play here is to enjoy the class and make all the girls laugh. Make them all think you’re funny, respectful, and easy going. The one will make her pass at you.

 

[SW15]

My opinion:

Gym classes are misandric. The club music, the feminine equipment, socializing atmosphere, etc. all convey that such classes are for WOMEN only.

They know (or they THINK they know) that you're there to meet women. Most men don't do yoga.

You're intruding on the ladies' social hour.

You're like the hunter scaring away the deer, because women spook easily.

If you're gonna use the gym to meet women then it's best to be out on the gym floor, head down, busting ass lifting weights.

Or attend more "masculine" classes.

I have been to numerous fitness classes since 2012 to meet women.

Yoga was my least favorite. I'm just not into the whole practice of it to meet women.

@Espi mentioned more "masculine" classes. I agree that there is a masculinity/femininity continuum of fitness classes. The most feminine classes are dance/Barre/Zumba type classes, followed by Pilates. Don't go to either of those classes. It is more acceptable for a man to attend yoga class. While acceptable, it may not be ideal.

I've primarily gone to the more "masculine" classes, which are interval training type classes, including HIIT and boxing/kickboxing. Even in these classes, the audience is often 65-70% women. Additionally, I enjoy this style of exercise far more than yoga.

Interval type classes are rarely ladies' social hour in my experience. I rarely saw women socializing with other women after these types of classes. I also saw fewer men approaching women at these classes than I would have thought.

I don't believe in the whole building rapport thing with fitness classes. It is unknown if you'll ever see that person again in fitness class. I believe in asking out after fitness class if you can get a good 5 minute+ conversation out of a woman.

I think interval classes are a better bet than the regular gym floor for asking out because the earbud problem is eliminated.

 

[BadBoy89]

I’ve been practicing various forms of yoga at home for about ten years now, but when I do go to a studio I sit in the front row near the instructor.

This way everyone can see me and they’re more comfortable knowing I’m not in the back being a creep.

Lol. That’s why I always show up late to Yoga class. Not my fault all the spots in the front row are taken.

Personally I don’t think anything works at Yoga or the Gym unless you are good shape, tall, chiseled, the regular stuff. I‘ve pulled faster on a 30 seconds elevator ride than 1 year going to Yoga or the Gym.

I only hire female personal trainers between 20-30. The Gym offered the top personal trainer in the City to me at half price, but it was a guy and I refused. Only female b/n 20 - 30. Same thing for Yoga Instructor Same thing for anything. Everyone who works for me is female. Anyone who phones me that is male, I RARELY call back unless necessary.

And they say young women don’t rule the world...

 

[MatureDJ]

Do you DJs go for awhile before asking out on the date? Went for first time to a yoga class tonight and it was small. Myself and 4 chicks. One chick was a HB 8.5 and the other was a HB 7.5. Would love to approach either but they both bolted like immediately right when the class ended.

I didn’t want to approach necessarily on class 1 since I think they are regulars and it was my first one tonight. I assume building some rapport before asking out in this setting is best or does it make sense to go straight for the kill and ask them out in the first good conversation you get with them?

I did speak to the instructor for awhile tonight after class. She’s a bit older but figured it would help for social proof if she and I are friendly and the others see that.

How's your face? Are you gymcel-tier?

 

[MatureDJ]

My opinion:

Gym classes are misandric. The club music, the feminine equipment, socializing atmosphere, etc. all convey that such classes are for WOMEN only.

They know (or they THINK they know) that you're there to meet women. Most men don't do yoga.

You're intruding on the ladies' social hour.

You're like the hunter scaring away the deer, because women spook easily.

If you're gonna use the gym to meet women then it's best to be out on the gym floor, head down, busting ass lifting weights.

Or attend more "masculine" classes.

The problem is that the "masculine" classes are sausage fests.

 

[MatureDJ]

I will say the really hot ones I am interested in have bolted quickly out before I could strike up the conversation though.

You have just answered your own question. Chicks that work out have the highest standards, and it starts at being Chad-tier, with plenty of other requirements along the way.

 

[MatureDJ]

My opinion would be to just regularly attend classes for awhile and don’t try to strike up a conversation (beyond “hi” / “bye”) before or after class unless they initiate. Demonstrate that you’re there for yoga and not chicks. Over time, as the regulars and instructors grow comfortable with your presence, you can gradually interact more with others and begin to build rapport and even develop a social circle. As a new member, don’t bite too fast on any chick who seems interested, it could potentially ruin your reputation and hurt your chances of creating comfort at the studio, and thus, developing a social circle down the line. Ultimately, that would be an ideal situation — a social circle of hot women that gives you instant social proof. Play the long-term game.

Hope my insider perspective provides you with some useful insight.

Excellent advice. Consider these workout gals as friend/acquaintance fodder, and take your shots on the gals' gal friends that don't workout as much. Of course, you have to be congruent; if you are gymcel-tier, then even the long game won't work, and it's over before it even starts.

 

[MatureDJ]

I only hire female personal trainers between 20-30. The Gym offered the top personal trainer in the City to me at half price, but it was a guy and I refused. Only female b/n 20 - 30. Same thing for Yoga Instructor Same thing for anything. Everyone who works for me is female. Anyone who phones me that is male, I RARELY call back unless necessary.

And they say young women don’t rule the world...

This reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where the gang was telling George about this great masseuse, so he signed up for a message, but instead got a Chad-tier MASSEUR.

 

[jimwho]

Didn't Costanza ask Seinfeld if he was gay because he thought it moved? Too funny..

(ALSO) Clearly there are some pro's here. Can someone suggest a good beginners handbook or site? All I have
Is a new big thick folding matt. Not so much to workout and sweat, but to get limber.

 

[SW15]

The problem is that the "masculine" classes are sausage fests.

I've primarily gone to the more "masculine" classes, which are interval training type classes, including HIIT and boxing/kickboxing. Even in these classes, the audience is often 65-70% women. Additionally, I enjoy this style of exercise far more than yoga.

I've rarely seen an interval style class fall below 60% women. That's not a sausage fest.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

My opinion:

Gym classes are misandric. The club music, the feminine equipment, socializing atmosphere, etc. all convey that such classes are for WOMEN only.

They know (or they THINK they know) that you're there to meet women. Most men don't do yoga.

You're intruding on the ladies' social hour.

You're like the hunter scaring away the deer, because women spook easily.

If you're gonna use the gym to meet women then it's best to be out on the gym floor, head down, busting ass lifting weights.

Or attend more "masculine" classes.

I think they will need to view him as a "regular" and accept him into the group first, then he will have access to potential dates...

Also if done right, you could spark a competition between the two women for you.