Cheating: Pro's and Con's

[borntoblossom]

Lately there are a lot of threads that end up talking about cheating, but since the topic is an important and controversial one, I feel it deserves a thread of its own…It’s an oldie but a goodie

So, how do you define cheating? From your own experience, do women cheat more often than men do? Is it alright to cheat as long as you don`t get caught? Are there any double standards when it comes to cheating? And why do people cheat?...

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Cheating is the exchange of intimacies between external party without the expressed written or verbal consent from the primary partner. Cheating is not neither wrong or right, it just is. It's based on an individuals personal morality of each of us and not of social norms.

People tend to be very self righteous about this and attempt to expound their virtues on others based upon their personal life experiences. A lot of emotional energy is expend on it such as religion, politics and sexual preference. It's a waste of breath and effort denouncing someone else for their actions. Everyone lives in their own reality with their own perceptions and definition of morality.

Opportunity is the means of cheating and both men and women are equally capable of taking advantage of any available opportunities. A question may be who does it better, who has the better ability to cheat successfully? Is it necessarily a person's sex or the person's ability?

 

[Climax]

My 2c...

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Cheating is not neither wrong or right, it just is.

Cheating in all cases is wrong in my opinion... there is NO excuse for cheating. And someone pulling into you when u are drunk out of your mind is not considered cheating, unless you actually kiss/f*ck them back etc.

If you are in a relationship, no matter if its serious or not, cheating is wrong and shouldnt be done in any degree and/or circumstance.

BUT

ESPECIALLY if you are in a long term relationship, cheating is really out of the question when it comes to it being "ok" or not. If you cheat on your partner, then you obviously dont love them, and normally in a LTR you love your partner, or at least come CLOSE to loving them, so cjeating in a LTR means that 1) u dont love your partner, and 2) you arte ying to your partner and building up more pain in the future, when u DO break your partners heart.

Overall... cheatin is a very stupid thing, and its a very shallow thing to do, and personally, i dont have much respect for people that think that its "ok" to cheat, no matter WHAT relationship you are in, as long as you are bound to another person, you CANNOT be with someone else.


borntoblossom said:

do women cheat more often than men do?

Well... women are more likely to do so because of the fact that they do not have to put as much effort into getting with another guy as a guy hasd to when wanting to get with another girl... its normally the men that make the moves on the women...

But on the other hand, women are more "rational" when it comes to this kind of thing, because they have more "self control".
Eg: If a hot babe came up to a man in a club, and his gf was not there, and this hot babe tried to kiss the guy, chances are, that he wouldnt pull away, unless he really IS a loyal guy, and sadly, there arent many of them around anymore

BUT

If a hot guy came up to a girl in a club, and her bf wasnt there, and the guy pulled into her, the chances of her pulling away are greater than the chances of the guy pulling away from the hot babe.

I know that this is true because of the fact that i have seen in with my friends etc, and i have read about this sort of situation in other sources and places.


borntoblossom said:

Is it alright to cheat as long as you don`t get caught?

Cheating is never "alright!"


borntoblossom said:

And why do people cheat?...

People cheat for a few reasons....

1) They get bored with their bf/gf and feel the need for something new/different.

2) For the fun of it

3) If the person does not take his current relationship seriously and doesnt care if it ends

4) Temptation - So the person might not be the kind of person that would cheat, but if the opportunity arises, then he/she will take it because of poor seld/dicipline and/or lack of self control.

5) They are drunk and are unaware of what they are fully doing, but are still in the state of mind where they know that they are cheating, but just dont care and do it anyways because of the fact that they can use the "i was drunk" excuse afterwards.

6) If the person has just had a fight with his/her partner and is feeling very vulrenable, and then a hunk/babe comes up and comforts them and then 1 thing leads to another

7) Revenge - this is a way often used these days... if the one person in the relationship does something wrong, then cheating on him/her is a fulfiling way to get revenge on the other (without telling the other that they actually cheated on thm, this just makes the pesron that is getting "revenge" feel better) <--- i have seen this happen several times


Well those are a few "reasons" that people cheat, therea re many others, but these are the only ones that come to mind at the present moment.... Bu i think you get the idea


Laterz...

 

[car501]

I have to agree with ~ªêQµïTª$~.
Even if you want to look at it from a 'selfish' standpoint for yourself. If you hook up with someone who is cheating on someone to be with you, that shows the mentality & integrity of that person.Buuuzzzzzz. Thank you for playing, next contestant.If someone will cheat on another to be with a person, does that person think they won't get cheated on in turn. To me its a bad decision.

 

[Double J]

If a girl cheated on me, I wouldn't think twice in telling her to F*ck off. I don't tolerate that from any girl. If a girl does that to me (unless I've been a really bad person and truly deserved it), I will always feel like I could do better and would never consider giving the person another chance.

 

[cactus3178]

People cheat for whatever reason they can rationalize.

My opinion is this:

If you kiss another chick, you cheated because the intent was there. Obviously, if you have sex with her, you cheated.

Cheating is wrong. Even if your not married, etc, it's wrong. It's a violation of trust, and as far as I'm concerned; no trust, no relationship. And when I say relationship I mean it in the most literal sense.

If a b*tch cheats, she's gone. Period.

If you cheat, shame on you.

If you want to f*ck random ho's, don't be in a relationship.

 

[DeathDealer]

~ªêQµïTª$~ is right on the money. I recently saw a movie called "Sideways" (it's alright, dunno why ppl are oscar nominating this) and this guy was going to get married in a week, he figured he wanted to have a last bang with some chick. So he banged 2 chicks but got messed up from both of them (karma) - his wife... she doesn't know jack. But the guy he feels alright, but karma is a b1tch and boy does it payback.

If you want to get it on with another girl, you are no longer a Don Juan, but one of those las vegas fast talking sleazebags.

 

[The Rev]

Moral relativism is one of the greatest evils of this time. It is responsible for the downfall of Western civilization.

 

[MrHarris]

If your in a committed relationship and you have outside intamacy with another person, that is cheating.

I view cheating as a infidelity. It's better to move on or be honest with the people that your seeing about dating others.

 

[PRMoon]

when you're in a committed relationship, spoken or unspoken, and you go out and nail another chic, your girlfriend has all grounds to say you were cheated. If you're okay with that and you know she'll come back then it's obviously not a big deal. The same goes for her if she hooks up with another guy... cheating

Now if you try to "sneak around" on a girl you really like and she catches you and breaks up with you leaving you crying like a baby, well then you're just and idiot who is very insecure about your feelings and she was too good for you anyway. Still the bottom line is cheating must involve some kind of relationship and then a person performing acts that violate that contract in some way.

 

[AverageFC]

women cheat more then men do. I think it's an 80% statistic.

 

[Reyaj]

This sounds like a good one for the archive.


I can't take anyone's opinion seriously on this who is still a teenager, no offense.

There are double standards in this world and that is just the reality of life.

I think cheating is wrong, but its something that is done by guys.

All men cheat in one way or another. If you aren't married, you shouldn't let yourself feel guilty about it.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by John Blonn
Moral relativism is one of the greatest evils of this time. It is responsible for the downfall of Western civilization.

I could see this statement soar over so many heads in this thread...

 

[Kaine]

women cheat more then men do. I think it's an 80% statistic.

Did you know that 78.5% percent of all statistics are pulled out of someones a$$.

Where did you get that statistic from?

I'd be interested to know if this is true and the sample and method this was found.

Is this also consistant across cultures, you would tend to think not.

For instance in the more conservative asian cultures. Or maybe it's just not talked about as much.

I would think in western culture its more rampant, perhaps due to the liberal way of thinking and also the general 'me' culture.

Kaine

 

[BLUEox117]

thats why getting in a committed relationship is like being in chains, its better to just go with all the woman you know on a date by date basis, and if they call your their bf tell them you are seeing other people, its as straight as that.

 

[MacDiddy]

A fair proportion of couples in western society (50% it has been reported) end up in divorce and in that time I'm sure there is a fair proportion of couples that cheat.... Thats not including couples that are not married...

Even tho cheating is wrong...now... its not gonna take long for it to be acceptable....

remember... adultery use to be a crime....

no point intended... just thort I'd throw in some provoking thorts

 

[BLUEox117]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
I could see this statement soar over so many heads in this thread...

ya **** morals man.

 

[PurpleHaze]

does it matter on what the girl did? for example kissing vs. having sex. does the magnitude of the cheating matter or is it black and white, a cheater is just as worse as any other cheater?

 

[MetalFortress]

Ignoring all the wannabe philosophers here, cheating is:

1) something you would do with another partner behind your girl's back that you wouldn't do in front of your gf (or bf for chicks)

2) wrong.

 

[AMF]

Originally posted by John Blonn
Moral relativism is one of the greatest evils of this time. It is responsible for the downfall of Western civilization.

Through increasing technologies of surveillance, the perception of more personal agency and a more even distribution of civil power, the only real change has probably been the peeling away of the carefully-maintained moral facade mandated by dominant social institutions - underpinned by religion - for the preservation of established socio-political inequalities.