Cheating, and why I'll do it next time around

[d9930380]

Friends are just the same.

When you hit rock bottom there will be no-one around.

Basically people are only interested in other people when it benifits them, you can't blame women for this. How long would you stay with your girlfriend if she got fat or started to depress you?

As for cheating, think about how you feel now. Do you really want to do that to someone else? If you need to take some time off then do that, if you need to just **** around for a while then do that but don't get into another relationship until you have moved on emotionally.

 

[edger]

So only two weeks before she broke up with you she was telling you that she wanted to get married? That means you weren't engaged. Did you either tell her you weren't ready to get married or avoided the subject? If so, then it's entirely possible that she just got fed up waiting for you to propose and decided to move on.

No, I was ALL FOR getting married.

Yes, a lot of women are selfish...and so are a lot of men. Our society as a whole is selfish and has a sense of entitlement.

But the difference is like I said, men aren't selfish by CHOICE. They are like that because of the nature of women. Women wanna play hardball, so we're sucked in to play it too.

As you get older you will hopefully realize that making the choice to betray others because someone hurt you will only lead you to hurt yourself in the long run. If you become a cheater and then end up involved with someone you love who genuinely loves you and you cheat then another woman you love will end up leaving you. Do you really want to self-sabotage in that way? Setting yourself up to have failed relationships is not a wise choice...and in the end it will be you who ends up getting hurt the most.

Wyld, I'm not choosing to cheat because I've been hurt, and am looking to "get back", I'm doing it because as a man, I have no other choice given the nature of women. I am not passing up good opportunities when presented with them. I'm not taking that risk.

 

[edger]

How long would you stay with your girlfriend if she got fat or started to depress you?

Right, I agree, I wouldn't. Women look for certain things in men(how much of a DJ he is), and men look for certain things in women(how hot she is). This is why the mating/dating game between men and women is a viscous cycle. Like Rollo T. and others out there have stated countless times before, the sexes were meant to be COMPLIMENTARY to each other, not the other way around. And as unfortunate and sad that may be, it's reality.

As for cheating, think about how you feel now. Do you really want to do that to someone else?

You're contradicting yourself, because you're saying "you can't blame women for acting out of their self-interests", yet you're knocking me for acting out of my own self-interests; only thing being, in my case(and all other men)I'm left with no other choice, given the nature of women.

If you need to take some time off then do that, if you need to just **** around for a while then do that but don't get into another relationship until you have moved on emotionally.

I have moved on emotionally, I just know what I know now, and how to deal with it in the future.

 

[edger]

People, as you all are well aware(I hope), all this conflict wouldn't exist, if both sexes weren't complimentary to each other. The world(nature) is f*cked up, just gotta roll with the punches.

 

[STR8UP]

But you’ll soon find out very few are actually “taken”. As I’ve said before, many are just treading water waiting on the next best guy: YOU!

Agreed 100%.

If you limit yourself to only "single" women you are ruling out about 75% of the opportunities out there.

 

[MightyMate]

I always took advantage and cheaten. Also when You are in relatio You have more advantages than usual. It owns.

 

[Wyldfire]

edger...women are reactive to men. Everything a woman does in a relationship is a reaction...it's the nature of women. If a guy is finding himself in situations where the woman is not reacting the way he wants her to it's because he is not acting in the way that will elicit the reaction he wants. If men could wrap their minds around this very simple concept and learn how to properly utilize it they would not need any other "tactic".

You're going to do whatever you choose to do...however, the choice you have made is not going to make you happy in the long run. I've seen it happen many times with very deep regrets. But hey...it's your life and your mistakes to make.

 

[jophil28]

I never had ANY trouble from women until I got to an age when two things happened simultaneously-
1. I started to emotionally care about them
2. I wanted more from them than sex. I am talking about involvement and loyalty and honesty.
That is when all the shyte started. Go figure !!

 

[Luthor Rex]

I never had ANY trouble from women until I got to an age when two things happened simultaneously-
1. I started to emotionally care about them
2. I wanted more from them than sex. I am talking about involvement and loyalty and honesty.
That is when all the shyte started. Go figure !!

ABSOU-FVCKING-LUTLY CORRECT.

If you want a human-being instead of a hole then you're pretty much SOL.

 

[Jariel]

You can't blame men for why they are the way they are, because they're that way for a REASON. And that's because women, being selfish and the opportunists that they are, leave them no choice.

You wouldn't believe how many women I've heard say the same thing about men.

And therein lies the problem. People would rather blame everyone else than accept responsibility for themselves.

 

[edger]

You wouldn't believe how many women I've heard say the same thing about men.

And therein lies the problem. People would rather blame everyone else than accept responsibility for themselves.

Jariel, I'm not blaming anybody, all I'm saying is that, based on the premise that a woman will undoubtably act out of HER own self-interest, it would THEN be in MY best interest to cover MY ass and cheat while I have the opportunity, knowing that at any given moment my girlfriend can leave me. Simple. Why sit there months later kicking yourself in the ass for not jumping in on a good situation.

 

[edger]

edger...women are reactive to men. Everything a woman does in a relationship is a reaction...it's the nature of women. If a guy is finding himself in situations where the woman is not reacting the way he wants her to it's because he is not acting in the way that will elicit the reaction he wants. If men could wrap their minds around this very simple concept and learn how to properly utilize it they would not need any other "tactic".

Exactly. But women are the biggest opportunistic, ME ME ME, selfish beings on the planet. A guy can have great game and elicit any reaction he wants out of a woman(so long as he keeps up that great game), but that doesn't guarantee she'll remain loyal to him...because ANYTHING else can trigger her to leave and act out of self-interest.

 

[edger]

You're going to do whatever you choose to do

And so will women. And so the cycle never ends...

 

[Wyldfire]

Exactly. But women are the biggest opportunistic, ME ME ME, selfish beings on the planet. A guy can have great game and elicit any reaction he wants out of a woman(so long as he keeps up that great game), but that doesn't guarantee she'll remain loyal to him...because ANYTHING else can trigger her to leave and act out of self-interest.

Men are equally as selfish...just take a look around you on this forum. People in general are selfish. There are some people who aren't. I actually don't have a selfish bone in my body...but most people I know are extremely selfish...both men and women. I have 4 children...two boys and two girls. My daughters are 21 and 7...and neither are selfish at all. My sons (16 and 18), on the other hand, are extremely selfish. The girls are always sharing things with their brothers, and are very throughful. The boys never want to share with their sisters and I have to constantly remind them that their sisters always share with them and it's only right that they show the same generosity. Their father is extremely selfish as well, and always puts himself before his children.

I've known many people and the sense of entitlement and selfish behavior doesn't exist more in one sex than the other...it's pretty even.

Learning how to act in order to elicit the reaction that you want works exceedingly well. Do some reading about EQ and leadership and anything you can find that applies to relationships. I use those same methods and in my 41 years I have never been dumped even once. Every man either proposed to me or hinted around about marriage and brought the subject up first. From the time I learned to lead a relationship I have always been treated very well. Bottom line...even the most selfish person can be giving in a relationship if they value the relationship enough. Knowing how to lead correctly...in a subtle and unabusive way makes for a really great relationship that both people value very much.

 

[mintxx]

'From the time I learned to lead a relationship I have always been treated very well.'
Manipulating AFCs stops being satisfying eventually.

 

[joekerr31]

Exactly. But women are the biggest opportunistic, ME ME ME, selfish beings on the planet. A guy can have great game and elicit any reaction he wants out of a woman(so long as he keeps up that great game), but that doesn't guarantee she'll remain loyal to him...because ANYTHING else can trigger her to leave and act out of self-interest.

women are weak. man haven't you figured this out yet?

a woman CANNOT screw you over unless you let her. unless you put a blind fold on, hand the axe and go stand in front of a big target with an apple on your head she can't hurt you. personally i can see a woman going down the wrong path LONG LONG LONG before she expects me to, or before she even knows shes going down it.

but if you put her up on a pedastle, become addicted to her p*ssy, addicted to her stroking your ego, etc. - YOU ARE F*CKED!

ever notice how women are the bomb and then suddenly, one day, they pull a d*ck out of their pants and suddenly they own you? they b*tch about whatever they want. blame you for every little feeling they have. etc. when that moment happens, if you don't stand up for yourself it's over.

its over because in that moment she will always think that you are an AFC and that with enough manipulationa nd pressure applied you can be controlled to do what she wants.

the good news, is that if kick the pedastle out from under her at that moment, you can act like an AFC in the future and she will always be careful because she knows deep down you aren't an AFC. that any kindness you are showing is because you like her not becuase you NEED her.

this sh*t is so bloody simple.

 

[Mr.Positive]

Jariel, I'm not blaming anybody, all I'm saying is that, based on the premise that a woman will undoubtably act out of HER own self-interest, it would THEN be in MY best interest to cover MY ass and cheat while I have the opportunity, knowing that at any given moment my girlfriend can leave me. Simple. Why sit there months later kicking yourself in the ass for not jumping in on a good situation.

Edger, that's her problem, not yours...but cheating as an answer? Are you going to punish the next gal you get serious with for the actions of this one? That's called baggage....lose it. It sucks, but whatever you do, don't get bitter.

I'll say this, I've never cheated, and I never will. I've had some pretty crappy stuff happen to me from women, but I have integrity. I'll never lower myself to that level. If you need to screw around, don't get into a serious relationship. Weak people cheat. Go down fighting if you have to, but never compromise your values for anyone...ever.

 

[Wyldfire]

'From the time I learned to lead a relationship I have always been treated very well.'
Manipulating AFCs stops being satisfying eventually.

Being AFC has nothing whatsoever to do with how you treat a woman and everything with how you treat yourself. Being AFC has nothing to do with who leads the relationship, either. If the woman uses the ability to lead in a way that makes the man just as happy as she makes herself and it is done to make the relationship very good then it's all good. Now, if the woman led the relationship at the expense of the man and he just went along with it, then he'd be an AFC.

 

[Last Man Standing]

You will be shocked at how easily they justify and rationalized their behavior.

Here’s the really funny part of what I’m going through right now: One I’m seeing, who is cheating on her husband, gets really angry, jealous, when I tell her about other women I’m seeing. She wants ME to be monogamous with her while she is still with her husband!! She totally fails to see the irony.

Yes, this proves my point - you are not talking about women - you are talking about hors!!!! It must be placed in this context - you cannot "cheat" on a hor -- thus the phrase "spin plates" = spin hors!!!!!

 

[mintxx]

Being AFC has nothing whatsoever to do with how you treat a woman and everything with how you treat yourself. Being AFC has nothing to do with who leads the relationship, either. If the woman uses the ability to lead in a way that makes the man just as happy as she makes herself and it is done to make the relationship very good then it's all good. Now, if the woman led the relationship at the expense of the man and he just went along with it, then he'd be an AFC.

Yeah ok conceded, though I still don't totally agree, my point is more that leading is bad for the woman because she wants to be led, at least in my experience. I've had older women be fairly explicit about this. But ok.