Broke up with my girlfriend last night

[Alien]

Got 3 texts within an hour last night:

hey

i'm sorry and i miss you

Please talk to me

.. I didn't text back. This might be panic mode starting to sit in.

"Please talk to me" ...because it feels so good when cheated-on and lied-in-the-face boyfriends still want me, and give me back the control. ooh! it feels so good...

This is not panic mode.

What would be the meaning of talking to her? to being friends with her? or being lovers again? neither will happen, and you already know what she thinks about you.
Be storng

 

[Ease]

My ex used to put a lot of effort into her begging manipulation texts, they were almost like poems.

The smart man would not reply and move on.

The bad man would every so often drop a hint of sadness or emotion, just enough to light a hope in her, and then act the opposite to confuse. Prolonging her agony and suffering.

 

[TizZle]

Apparently, she was seeing some guy with a kid but it has not worked out because of drama. I heard this yesterday. I suspect that this was the reason why she wasn't at home the night i ended up breaking up with her.

Looks like a cased closed. So those texts, i believe, weren't panic mode. It looks more like, "the branch i tried to swing to was weak and broke so please take me back so i can disrespect you again in the same way"

 

[TizZle]

Got a missed call and a text tonight saying,"I'm sorry I love you".

I really don't know what to do here because I've never been in this situation.

 

[Ease]

Yea her branch broke and she's out in the open.

My ex that i mentioned kept up with these texts for about a month. Then 2 months later, when i was with a new girl, she started up again for another month.

Don't let her get to you, its easy to fall for it and feel sorry for her. But remember, she's only back because she lost her branch, she doesn't give a **** about you. She's still the same girl that was acting like an ungreatful ho when you were her boyfriend, and now feels lonely after she left you.

No sympathy, she honestly doesnt deserve it. If i was to go back i would have acted more harsh.

 

[Alien]

Got a missed call and a text tonight saying,"I'm sorry I love you".

I really don't know what to do here because I've never been in this situation.

Actions... not words!

She lied again into your face. she doesnt love you. You are a loser in her eyes. If you want a few more terrible months with disrespect, lies, head games, manipulation, then text her: "Oh! sorry darling! I love you too."

One more thing: The aim of sex after breakup is not "to have a few more good hours with my ex cause im still a bit in love with him". It is to get you back by your balls.

Believe me... her thoughts are ice cold when she is writing "i love you" text to you.

 

[TizZle]

Actions... not words!

She lied again into your face. she doesnt love you. You are a loser in her eyes. If you want a few more terrible months with disrespect, lies, head games, manipulation, then text her: "Oh! sorry darling! I love you too."

One more thing: The aim of sex after breakup is not "to have a few more good hours with my ex cause im still a bit in love with him". It is to get you back by your balls.

Believe me... her thoughts are ice cold when she is writing "i love you" text to you.

I'll take this into consideration. Sex won't, "get me back by the balls". She really never had me by the balls that i can recall.

You are right about the actions/words phrase tho.

Also. Ease. Did you break up with her or did she break up with you?

 

[Captain]

I'll take this into consideration. Sex won't, "get me back by the balls". She really never had me by the balls that i can recall.

You are right about the actions/words phrase tho.

Also. Ease. Did you break up with her or did she break up with you?

A woman can only "get you by the balls" IF YOU LET her. So long as you don't do that, you can do whatever you like with an ex.

 

[TizZle]

Broke NC on my end last night to gain information. Here's what i learned: she doesn't love nor miss me based on what transpired. Her interest level is low. I tested her and got this information based on how she handled the situation.

I gave her an opportunity to come over to my house last night. I got an excuse saying,"i dont want to argue" then i asked her what about the texts she sent me then, she didn't comment directly on them but said that she didn't think i was gonna get ahold of her. I asked her one of more if she was gonna stop by, she gave another excuse saying that she had homework to do also and that she getting behind in one of her classes and also she was at her friends house(which is a baseball throw away) and wasn't gonna leave there right then to come over.

So i hang up the phone saying it sounds like you don't have much time for me it sounds like, that's cool.

She immediately texts saying," ok thanks for letting me finish"
I text saying, " call before you stop by"

I get a text a little later saying, " Would you get mad if i stopped by another night?"

I didn't text back and got another text around 11pm saying, "ok good night then"

So i figured either and/or both:

1. her interest level isn't high and doesn't love nor miss me.
2. she playing games, seeing how much power she would have by seeing if i would compromise

In any case it looks like she falls under number 1 of the cardinal rules.

1. 95% OF WOMEN ARE UTTERLY WORTHLESS, (OTHER THAN FOR SEX OF COURSE) AND ULTIMATELY REPLACEABLE.

she is part of the 95%

 

[Kailex]

What in the world are you trying to accomplish?

Why in the blue hell are you trying to "gain information"? Stop sugar coating your intentions. You are "giving her opportunities" and she's obviously not biting. There's a deeper seeded reason for that then you think.

Why are you breaking NC?

You already knew she was worthless, so what else are you trying to prove to yourself here? Any woman who wanted to be "taken back" would have had that need supercede "homework" or being at a "friend's house". Obviously, she just wants her own emotional validation and doesn't really care about her situation with you.

I'm hoping you are aiming to keep it NC because this lesson learned is something any of us have already told you, could have told you, or has been previously posted here before.

 

[TizZle]

I broke NC because I wanted to clear up any doubts or possibilities for regret. Breaking NC didn't harm me one bit. If anything it boosted her ego a little, but she doesn't matter.

Lesson Learned.

 

[Serg897]

TizZle, this story makes me a bit angry and its not even me thats being effected. This woman is playing games - as soon as you give an inch she will disrespect and mistreat you in exactly the same way. Its such bull**** that some women act like this, but its the sad reality

I dont blame you for breaking NC, but this confirms beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is utterly worthless - completely unworthy of any attention from you. Move on with your life and leave that trash behind.

 

[jophil28]

I broke NC because I wanted to clear up any doubts or possibilities for regret. Breaking NC didn't harm me one bit. If anything it boosted her ego a little, but she doesn't matter.

Lesson Learned.

You held the high ground until you broke NC....and then you gave her exactly what she wanted - the certain knowledge that she has you in her grip. She knew why you contacted her because women know how to play this psychological power game much better that men.

Her replies were her way of having "the last word"... She "doubled dumped" you.
The first time she dumped you was when she lied to you . You found out and went NC. At that point your relationship was over..
Then she texted you until you weakened and contacted her , and so then she dumped you again through the indifference of her replies.
She got EXACTLY what she wanted .

 

[teacha]

you only broke NC because deep down you still like her and really wanted to believe all the bullsh!t she was feeding you. Don't worry it aint your fault; we are only human.

 

[The Mad Ghost]

Wait, what is she sorry for? I only read up until you left her stuff on the porch, knocked on the door and didn't look back. What is she texting you sorry for? Do you have 100% proof that she was cheating? I'm going to bookmark this thread for future reference.

So what is the gameplan for the aftermath?

Are you going hail of glory NC? What about not giving a fvck and just talking to her anyway? Has anyone tried that? I think that is the biggest shocker, talking to her like a friend? Yea it sounds crazy, but from experience like this, I just think it shows you having your boystrous emotions out onthe table, "Ooh he's not talking to me, boo-hoo". Fvck that, I think captain highlighted something on this about No Contact situations. I just think it gives here power, yes, even though shes seemingly begging you back.

 

[Igetit!]

Jophil and Teacha were bang on with their responses.

Jophil said that you gave her EXACTLY what she wanted,and he was right.
Teacha said that the reason you broke the no contact was because in reality,you still have feelings for her....and he was right.


Having feelings for an ex,even one who mistreated you isn't a crime,it doesn't make you any less of a man,it's letting those feelings CONTROL YOU that's the problem.


This girl made a FOOL out of you with your cooperation and assistance. It'd be a lot easier to respect you as a man if you'd just be honest and stop trying to fool people who already know better with that "I broke NC because I wanted to clear up any doubts or possibilities for regrets" crap.


All it took was a few "I'm sorry" and "I love you" texts from her to make you crumble,yet in reply #9 of this thread,you actually had the nerve to call yourself a "NC master". :crackup:



Breaking the NC in and of itself may not have been so bad,but you inviting her over to your place is where you really screwed up. And as Jophil said,you gave her what she wanted. She NOW knows that if she ever has need of another "branch" to swing over to,she has you as a backup.



And why wouldn't she think that? After all the lies and whatever else she's done,where most men would have kicked her to the curb,here you go inviting her over to your home.



I bet the second you said that to her,on the inside she was like,"Hehehe....yep,I still got him.....sucka".




You say that you broke the NC in order to get some type of information.
Really. Well did you get the "information" you were after? And if breaking the NC was to get info from her,then what was the goal of inviting her over to your house? Because whatever it was,the girl had enough sense not to fall for it. Seems like the only one who got what they wanted out of this whole thing was her



That reply #29 was just freakin' HORRID. Boy,talk about displaying neediness.


She lies and disrespect you-----you invite her to you house.
Then you asked her about the texts she sent you,the SAME TEXTS THAT YOU PREVIOUSLY IGNORED,which let's her know that you got them all AND that they had an effect on you.


Then you asked her about coming over a second time,and she blew you off a second time talking about homework.



And this part I HATE:you said to her,"Well it looks like you don't have much time for me". Needy to the 5th power. Why would she have time for you after you dumped her?



You've been here too long to make FOOLISH mistakes like that.

 

[synergy1]

anyone else noticing a theme to most of these threads? A poster asks for advice and gets great responses from members only to do the opposite after about a week. most of the time, its someone fishing for a response than fits their worldview of being a chump.

It doesn't matter how you spin it bro, you broke NC and went right back to square one. As robert Greene says, "plan all the way to the end". You planned right up until the point where she says I love you, than you bailed. The only thing worse than being disrespected once is twice, and that happened to you. Pretty basic life stuff here which ended in pure fail.

95% OF WOMEN ARE UTTERLY WORTHLESS, (OTHER THAN FOR SEX OF COURSE) AND ULTIMATELY REPLACEABLE.

This kind of mindset is intended to ease the suffering when in reality you were an enabler of this behavior by stooping to that level. People aren't worthless, and broad generalizations are indications of a weak personality which is unable to cope with the realities of life. Enjoy living your life filled with hate.

My advice to you? learn from this and move on. Accept the reality but don't hate it. The situation was poorly played on your end. Own that responsibility. It will help you grow as an individual. It is alright to feel hurt as we are all only human. Channel your pain into improvement and start by ditching this b1tch and listening to the community who has been trying to help you.

 

[Serg897]

Igetit! is spot on like he ussually is, but I will add something else:

Despite all the knowledge one gains from this forum, all the practical tools one gets from visiting this place and the right mindset - its still very, very, VERY easy for your emotions to get a hold of you and for you to slip and make an AFC mistake.

All it takes is one moment where you lose perspective. One phone call. One text. It doesn't make you less of a man to have these feelings, and like I mentioned earlier - I don't blame you for breaking NC. You mentioned that this is the first time a situation like this has been encountered. Its hard to do things right the first time in a sh!tty situation like this when so much emotional energy has been invested.

I've been there, I've done that. I've done the worst AFC maneuvers you can possibly think of, even with years of being on here. We all make mistakes. The important thing is that you know exactly where you went wrong and you can make sure you never hit this particular stumbling block ever again.

You still have feelings, and that is 100% understandable - but never forget that this girl is complete trash, who will never respect you or treat you the way you DESERVE to be treated. Stay NC, and learn from this.

 

[Re-ac-tor]

No need to add anything that's already been stated.

You know what to do, now tell your inner child to shut the fvck up.

 

[Captain]

Broke NC on my end last night to gain information.

which leads to/contributes to:

Her interest level is low.

2. she playing games, seeing how much power she would have by seeing if i would compromise

She knows how much power she has, which is a sh!tload more than you do, because you broke no contact and tried to get validation from her.