Breaking up with a girl who does NOTHING wrong..

Night Time Pimp

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
18
Reaction score
0
Age
38
Any of you ever experience anything like this? This is my first post on these forums, and I think it's fitting I start out with a rather unique problem I'm facing. I graduate high school this month, and I've been with the same girl for the past 3 years (3 years last May).

Now, she is an amazing girl. She doesn't lie to me (unless it's extremely trivial), she doesn't cheat, she doesn't drink, she doesn't flirt with other guys, she's HOT, and she loves to f*ck. She also claims to be head-over-heels in love with me, as I'm her only boyfriend she's ever had, and the ONLY person she's ever fooled around with (beyond kissing and up the shirt). She's the only girl I've ever had sex with, but I've fooled around with plenty of others before her.

So what's the problem?

I don't know! I was happy with her for the longest time. We had our rough patches of fighting a lot earlier this year, but we managed to resolve all our issues, and it felt like my love for her was still in high gear.

However, as more and more time goes by, I find myself increasingly attracted to other women that I know I can get with. I've tried taking breaks from my girl and even a full-out break-up before, but she KEEPS COMING BACK!

I always feel so guilty too because of it, because she never did anything to deserve me ending things, so I keep taking her back. I know most guys would kill to have a girl like this, but I don't know. Anyone else ever feel like this?

Where you seemingly have THE perfect woman, yet you still feel like there's something missing?

I don't know if I should just slap myself and appreciate what a great girl I have, or say f*ck it, avoid her and answer to my penis. =)

What do you guys think?
 

golf299

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 1, 2002
Messages
417
Reaction score
1
Location
STL
don't be stupid. if you break up with her and think that you'll find another girl like her with ease... you'll need more than your fair share of good luck.
 

chili kat

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 22, 2003
Messages
149
Reaction score
1
yeah...well..here's the thing, man. That feeling of wanting to hit something else doesn't really ever go away. You wont quench it by roaming for a while. Considering the girl you've landed, I'm sure you'll be able to bed yourself a few hotties, but in the long run it pans out to quick pleasure and a high possibility for later regrets. Odds aren't good that you'll find another one like that in short order when you finally decide you need that. But whatever...to each thier own...you decide.
 

h a r d a s s

Don Juan
Joined
May 25, 2004
Messages
61
Reaction score
0
i am going thru the EXACT same thing as you. I really dont see other girls being as good as the one i got, but i just dont feel that "in love" 1 girl all the time thing for her anymore.

I'm gonna stick with her though and when I get to college I'll probably go on a break with her... if its meant to b i dont think that would stop it, we'd both know we're happier with each other.

I feel for u tho, bro... it ain't gonna b easy telling her you want to see other ppl.
 

Night Time Pimp

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
18
Reaction score
0
Age
38
Bumping this due to a lot of views but not a lot of added input...
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Sexual

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2004
Messages
729
Reaction score
4
You're only 18. I went through the same when I was 17 over a girl I was with for over a year.

Their clingyness gets to you, if you were doing the same you'd be in her boat.
You're a guy in ur prime and it's normal to want more.
You're bored (this can be fixed by doing new things with her, have you tried anal?)
Women are naturally more attracted to a guy with a hot LTR and it's hard to resist.

Today I look back on that girl that I was like that with and her faults came into play- she's pregnant with a horrible boyfriend who can't stand her need to be clingy while I'm enjoying my life and have the stars in my aim.

My vote is you're not ready for all that stuff and you feel she's holding you back. I just got over my second HB like that and there's more where they came from. Just keep going until you find the woman that fits your needs. If she's not clingy and absolutely perfect- then the kind of girl sounds like u want is the one you have.... that lets you go out and get ur f*ck on with different girls when u want 2. You won't find too many of those without letting them do the same, tho.
 

BrotherAP

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2005
Messages
722
Reaction score
5
Age
43
Location
Earth
I'm on the fence here.

See, I was completely pvssy whipped by the first girl that I was sexually. I was known to spew such filth as "I know she's the only one for me" and "She's amazing - how could I not want to be with only her?" when secretly I was thinking "I really wish I could just fvck those hot *****es who were flirting with me" and I wouldn't admit to myself that I actually did need to go out and meet other girls. In fact, I let it get to the point where she cheated on me, and left me, and I was a little ***** trying to get her back. I wisened up a little - no, make that a lot - and remembered back to my lustful days of wishing I could hook up with these girls, and I decided to stop wishing.

I'm happier now, being the inexperienced Don Juan that I am, than I ever was with my ex. I didn't realize it, but I was settling. I put up with sh!t that I really didn't have to because I understimated myself and what women would do for me when I actually expected it. I could have been you 6 months ago. I stayed with her, and I was stupid for doing so. I could have been having the time of my life.

That said, I was actually unhappy with her. You've got to look and ask why you're having these wandering thoughts. Is it her your unhappy with, or is it yourself? Don't stay in a situation that makes you unhappy - but don't bail if you're going to regret it later.
 

squirrels

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2003
Messages
6,627
Reaction score
178
Age
45
Location
A universe...where heartbreak and sadness have bee
IS she perfect if she doesn't excite you any more??

Why would you force yourself to be with someone when your heart's not in it?? How can that be RIGHT? Who says it's RIGHT??
 

Night Time Pimp

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
18
Reaction score
0
Age
38
It's not that she doesn't excite me anymore. We have tried new things (yes, anal included), and when we spend time together, everything is GREAT.

It's when I'm not with her, and I'm around other chicks, that these thoughts take shape. I KNOW they want me. I KNOW I could have them.

I think the main thing I don't want to do is break my girlfriends heart. She clearly loves me a LOT, and we've put in three years together. I know it would crush her to find out I stopped seeing her, then wound up banging some other girl for fun.

Seems like LTRs and men are doomed to a constant debate...

"I love her....but I also love the beauty that is all hot women....I love her personality....but I love the excitement of macking a new girl and the success of those panties slipping off...I love my girlfriend but I love punani!"
 

italostud

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
805
Reaction score
7
Age
43
During high school and part of college I was in a LTR for about 4 years. What happened to us? People change man. You're both still children. You will change and so will she. It's very rare that two people in your position will grow in the same direction.

It's totally up to you, but if you have ANY kinds of doubts, it's not a good sign.

Just remember ol' italo here, who missed 4 years of prime pimping time.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

squirrels

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2003
Messages
6,627
Reaction score
178
Age
45
Location
A universe...where heartbreak and sadness have bee
You're young, man. You can't be expected to want to stick with a girl from high-school on and on forever.

Some people do...they just meet one person who's the greatest f*cking thing in the world for them and vice-versa and they end up staying together forever.

But honestly, if you're posting this, you're not content where you are. Maybe eventually you'll grow into it, but you never know.

You have to make a choice, but it's a choice between two gambles.

On one hand, you could stay with your girl and gamble that you're always gonna be happy and not regret that you missed the chance to see other women.

On the other hand, you could break it off amiably with your girl and go see what the world has to offer, and gamble that you'll find something better and you weren't with the best woman for you already.

Which to choose? That's up to you. Only you can make that decision.
 

whistler

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2004
Messages
633
Reaction score
5
Location
New York
You get bored. It happens. I've ended my fair share of LTRs because of boredom, even though the girl continues to be wonderful.

Yes, you can find other girls who are just as good.

And yes, you do live with at least an ounce of wonder and regret.

But you need to live, and you need to put yourself first.

(That last one is hard to appreciate without a lot of experience, but it's so true.)
 

Night Time Pimp

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
18
Reaction score
0
Age
38
Just remember ol' italo here, who missed 4 years of prime pimping time.
:crackup:

That's what I needed to read right there.

To everyone else, thanks for the input. It really is a difficult decision to make. I can literally see all kinds of other LTRs around me, and HOW they fall apart. I can see, and have seen through experience, just HOW some women can turn into lying ho's.

I'm only 18 years old, true. I've only banged one girl, true. But before this LTR, I used to be a PIMPISH mofo, I had a macking spree over a year that lead to 15 or so hook-ups. I've had experience with interacting with these girls, and for the most part, they're spoiled brats who DETRACT from your life, as opposed to ADD to it.

My current girl however, has proven herself different. In the beginning, yes, she pulled her share of sh*t tests and tried to see what she could slide with. I put my foot down, told her if she wants to play games she walks, and since then, she has been the most loyal, loving girl I've ever seen.

People in my school literally assumed I had a "Golden D*ck" for keeping this HOTTIE so wrapped up in me. :D

I wouldn't say I'm bored with her. We see each other a couple times a week, bang like monkeys, have jokes and fun, then go and do our own thing.

I think somebody above best summed it up - "that feeling of wanting to hit something else doesn't ever go away".

Ah, to be male. :rolleyes:
 

golf299

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 1, 2002
Messages
417
Reaction score
1
Location
STL
i neglected to take your age in to consideration with my first post. at your age, if you are having doubts or are just simply wanting to try new things, then i say go for it.
 
Joined
Nov 6, 2003
Messages
4,281
Reaction score
8
Location
Wisconsin. USA
Originally posted by Night Time Pimp
It's not that she doesn't excite me anymore. We have tried new things (yes, anal included)
She is a hor and you are looking for a woman!! At 18, you don't know what you want, rather you know what you don't want!!
 

TonyTheTigerOI

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2003
Messages
659
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Buffalo, NY
PRL, I would just like you to know that if, in person, you called my LTR a hor for being sexually expiermental, I would LITERALLY beat you ugly. Thats just rude. Grow up man.

N T P - bro... believe me when I say this... the chances of finding the BEST girl for you at 15 is INCREDIBLY slim. Im youre age, and man, Ive met a few girls I could have tied myself down to. But I didnt. And Im glad. When youre 27, youre going to be looking for completely different things in a woman than you are now.

This is what I can tell you:

Keep her in youre life. I regret having could shouldered great girls in the past, jut because I was not looking for commitment. Dont make that mistake. Date her INEXCLUSIVELY.

It might sound crazy. It might sound unfair to her. It might sound like no woman in their right mind would be inexclusive with a guy in youre situation.

But a woman in love IS NOT IN HER RIGHT MIND. A woman in love would let you chase other girls - if it meant she could be with you for one night a week.

Right now, you arent in love with her. Maybe she really is in love with you. Th only way to find out is to be open and honest with her - tell her you have strong feelings for her, and you want her as a part of youre life, but you need to experiment with other women.

Will she understand? No. But if she loves you, she wont be able to turn down a night a week with you, as opposed to a full break up. And if she WONT let you experiment, she doesnt love you - she loves BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP. And that means shes just too inexperienced to appreciate you, as a man.

Sorry, I just got home from a bar, the grammar might be a lil off, but I hope you got the message.
 

h a r d a s s

Don Juan
Joined
May 25, 2004
Messages
61
Reaction score
0
:crackup:^^^^^

NTP I think i should thank you for asking this question since i'm going through the same thing, yall have given me much to ponder...
 
Top