Bitterness

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
Are any of you guys bitter about not having any success with women? I've had an underlying bitterness for about the last year. I can't stand to see other guys with their girlfriends, yet here I am with nothing.

I dropped out of college and lost my financial aid last semester because of this. I just couldn't stand the environment: attractive girls everywhere. I recently got my financial aid back, so I can go back to school now. But I don't know if I can do it. I'm thinking the same way now as I did last semester. I know when school starts it's going to hit me like a ton of bricks. If I lose my financial aid again, I can forget about going to school. I just don't think I can take another setback like that.
 

pooparu

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 22, 2006
Messages
412
Reaction score
10
Location
In a land called **** it.
Bitterness is that jealousy, that insecurity that comes from not being a confident man. You can really tell almost instantly up here the guys who really have the DJ mindset and mentality apart from the posers. The posers are the ones that are always skeptical, always calling bull****, always saying someone is lying, always saying something won't work, ALWAYS BEING NEGATIVE.

The real DJs up here applaud, give credit where its due, appreciate the input from other members, either good or bad, and congratulate guys and want to see them succeed.

You need to stop hating OTHER guys for your OWN insecurities, I know I'm giving it to you raw, but in the long run this is what you NEED to hear.

I suggest hopping into that DJ bible, there is wisdom from men all over the place that you could never possibly dream a bout.
 

Ace of Flames

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2006
Messages
1,508
Reaction score
16
Location
Everywhere you want to be.... I'm like a Visa card
knglerxt said:
I just don't think I can take another setback like that.
Then.... don't. It was your own fault the first time, don't cheat yourself out of college a second time.

Really, its not worth being bitter. Instead, take that energy and do something with it. When you see a couple walking around holding hands, don't get bitter and jealous, get motivated! The only thing keeping you from having that success is yourself. In all honesty, its not a woman's fault that you have no success. Can you blame them for not being interested in someone they aren't attracted to? Especially someone who's bitter towards them for no reason they are aware of?

Improve yourself, and lose that bitterness. You can only complain once you've done all you can, and STILL aren't getting any.
 

Proof

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 31, 2005
Messages
15
Reaction score
0
Wow

I can't believe you left college because you couldnt handle seeing attractive girls with guys! Holy **** dude, dont cheat yourself out of an education over something this stupid. I can see where your bitterness comes from, but NEVER, I mean NEVER, let it interfere with anything important you do like work, school, family life, ect. Dont hate the world, and ruin you life over not being able to get some girls thats retarded:nono: :nono: :nono: :nono: :nono:

wow, just wow.

Go take your anger out at the gym, running, or boxing---use it for something productive. Just dont leave school over it :down:
 

FaithHealer

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 1, 2006
Messages
40
Reaction score
0
Location
Texas
How hard are you actually trying to meet new women?
 

flexion_

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2003
Messages
1,619
Reaction score
10
Age
54
Don't blame women on you dropping out of school. Stop taking the victim role.

Women have nothing to do with your situation. Lack of women is just the end product of your own self-created issues.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
I think some of you are misunderstanding my post. I'm not blaming anyone for anything. I'm not bitter towards women at all. I'm bitter about the fact that I'm 25 years old, and I've been single my whole ****ing life.

I can't believe some of you guys can't see where I'm coming from. Do you know what it feels like to be 25 years old and never had any interaction with women whatsoever?! It ****ing sucks! Humans weren't meant to be alone all the time.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
FaithHealer said:
How hard are you actually trying to meet new women?

I'd love to meet women, but I'm just not a talkative guy. I've been like that since I was born. I don't even talk that much around my own family members. That's just the way I am.

How is a quiet guy supposed to meet women?
How hard can you try when you're not talkative?

It's like if you're not a talkative guy, you're pretty much screwed when it comes to women.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
flexion_ said:
Don't blame women on you dropping out of school. Stop taking the victim role.

Women have nothing to do with your situation. Lack of women is just the end product of your own self-created issues.

I'm not blaming women for anything. Reread my post.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
Proof said:
I can't believe you left college because you couldnt handle seeing attractive girls with guys! Holy **** dude, dont cheat yourself out of an education over something this stupid. I can see where your bitterness comes from, but NEVER, I mean NEVER, let it interfere with anything important you do like work, school, family life, ect. Dont hate the world, and ruin you life over not being able to get some girls thats retarded:nono: :nono: :nono: :nono: :nono:

wow, just wow.

Go take your anger out at the gym, running, or boxing---use it for something productive. Just dont leave school over it :down:


I'm trying not to let it interfere with school, but everytime I see an attractive girl or a guy with his girlfriend these feelings are triggered. I can't get away from it. It's bad enough in everyday life, but it's 10 times worse on a college campus.
 

Schmuck

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2006
Messages
73
Reaction score
0
I admit that seeing an endless see of hot girls at college and not having successes interferes with my ability to focus on school work. If I'm bitter, I don't show it. But one thing that is for sure, is that it is incredibly hard to have HBs engage you for longer then a few words or a laugh here or there.
There is a definite level in terms of looks that no matter what I have tired, I haven't crossed into.
 

Schmuck

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2006
Messages
73
Reaction score
0
knglerxt said:
I'm trying not to let it interfere with school, but everytime I see an attractive girl or a guy with his girlfriend these feelings are triggered. I can't get away from it. It's bad enough in everyday life, but it's 10 times worse on a college campus.
Yeah, seeing a couple where I find the girl attractive does trigger a flood of feelings in me too that I know don't really benefit me positively but it's there nontheless. It's something to do with empathizing with how happy the guy might be, and you not having the chance for the same kind of happiness. So I suppose jealousy is the key, like the other poster said.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
Schmuck said:
I admit that seeing an endless see of hot girls at college and not having successes interferes with my ability to focus on school work. If I'm bitter, I don't show it. But one thing that is for sure, is that it is incredibly hard to have HBs engage you for longer then a few words or a laugh here or there.
There is a definite level in terms of looks that no matter what I have tired, I haven't crossed into.


With me, these feelings are triggered everytime I see that stuff. So, that's what makes it so hard to stay in school. I start sinking deeper into depression, and before you know it I'm too far behind in my studies to continue with my classes.
 

knglerxt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
232
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
South Carolina
Schmuck said:
Yeah, seeing a couple where I find the girl attractive does trigger a flood of feelings in me too that I know don't really benefit me positively but it's there nontheless. It's something to do with empathizing with how happy the guy might be, and you not having the chance for the same kind of happiness. So I suppose jealousy is the key, like the other poster said.


The main thing that gets to me is that I know that most other people are sexually active, and I'm not. I mean I have the same desires as every other guy. I want to have sex with women, too. I can't just turn this urge on and off like a light switch; it's there whether I want it or not. It's just extremely frustrating to not be able to do what it takes to quell this desire.

This really makes you second guess yourself. Do girls even like me? Do girls like quiet guys? Will I ever find anyone?
 

Schmuck

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2006
Messages
73
Reaction score
0
knglerxt said:
With me, these feelings are triggered everytime I see that stuff. So, that's what makes it so hard to stay in school. I start sinking deeper into depression, and before you know it I'm too far behind in my studies to continue with my classes.
I think issues like these are a manifestation of very deep psychological issues. Thinking about my experience with it, I tend to think that I have issues with abandonment that stem from childhood. But, one thing it's not all environment, I think that guys like us who get sucked into depression because of these issues are at the mercy of heredity. I'm a very introspective and reflective person, so by nature I analyze almost everything and put high emphasis on things that do happen to me.
I think the only way to improve from this depression condition is to have positive reinforcement, but to get positive reinforcemnet (successes to your tries) you will be told to solve the depression issues... a nice catch-22 there.
 

wheelin&dealin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2002
Messages
1,924
Reaction score
6
Location
Vancouver, BC
knglerxt said:
Are any of you guys bitter about not having any success with women? I've had an underlying bitterness for about the last year. I can't stand to see other guys with their girlfriends, yet here I am with nothing.
The tides turn quickly. One day you won't have a girl on the go, the next day you might be going out with 3 HB's. Just focus on constant improvement. Results will follow.
 

SELF-MASTERY

Banned
Joined
Dec 15, 2004
Messages
1,975
Reaction score
7
Go see an escort; the game isn't within you.
 

GloriouslyInsane

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 7, 2006
Messages
507
Reaction score
1
Jealousy leads to anger,anger leads to hate,hate leads to depression.BUT there's another way,you have no idea how strong anger and hate are.If you tame your anger and use it to your benefit you can succeed more than you think.
 

Schmuck

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2006
Messages
73
Reaction score
0
SELF-MASTERY said:
Go see an escort; the game isn't within you.
If you are being serious, do you agree that there is a point at which one should just accept things as they are, give up, and just settle for what one can get ?
 

Bvbidd

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 16, 2006
Messages
1,482
Reaction score
8
You can either actually start being talkative or try some other ways. Such as going for them when their drunk.. etc.

The way I see it not many people are actually social for the sake of being social.. but a normal person is somewhere in the middle.. where they know being social is required to live your life and they suck it up and do it.

So if your not shy.. just start talking more. Lots of guys have tried to do the "Oh everybody else is just stupid when they keep talking" thing but they end up living a boring life.
 
Top