Beware the "Life Coach"

[9Volt]

But why do you think guys like myself who come here and vent often.....ARE NOT taking the bullets, getting right back up, and going for another round?

You honestly think Guru that just because I come on here and vent, that I don't log off and go RIGHT back into the field?

Sosuave to me (at times) is like hitting the bag at the gym. I come here, let off some fvcking steam, clear my head, then get the fvck BACK out there and keep fighting.

What I hate is the "assumption" that just because I'm clearing my head, venting, ranting, etc., on Sosuave, that I'm somehow "weak". That would be like saying the guy who goes to the gym to hit the bag or push weights to let off steam, is WEAK because supposedly only WEAK people need to let off steam. That makes no sense.

Tenacity some people just like to hear themselves talk. You would too if you spent 30 days in the box.

 

[guru1000]

But why do you think guys like myself who come here and vent often.....ARE NOT taking the bullets, getting right back up, and going for another round?

You honestly think Guru that just because I come on here and vent, that I don't log off and go RIGHT back into the field?

Sosuave to me (at times) is like hitting the bag at the gym. I come here, let off some fvcking steam, clear my head, then get the fvck BACK out there and keep fighting.

What I hate is the "assumption" that just because I'm clearing my head, venting, ranting, etc., on Sosuave, that I'm somehow "weak". That would be like saying the guy who goes to the gym to hit the bag or push weights to let off steam, is WEAK because supposedly only WEAK people need to let off steam. That makes no sense.

You somehow--again--made this thread about YOU. What a surprise!

So since you want to talk about you, let's. NO, I don't think you are weak. BUT, you can learn the art of stoicism, which will help you immensely in your personal and business interests. My original point was clearly explained in Post 20.

 

[9Volt]

No BeTheChange, the most recent embarrassing threads from only 4 months ago show YOU getting fired in a blaze of unglory when your BPD ex dumped you because you were beating her.

Then you proceeded to talk to yourself for 37 days in the NC thread spouting motivational cliches ripped off from these "life coaches" only to go back to that hoe, while telling us how "in control" you were all along. Rinse and repeat.

Then you claimed to have 15 plates in a rotation at once and couldn't provide ONE pic. The entire forum except for the other 2 or 3 psychopaths laughed at you. Not just me. Ask Infern0 (another BPD poster) how that was received.

The threads about my BPD were from over 2 years ago and I have barely mentioned her since. You actually don't know anything about me other than I had one bad job and one bad relationship, because I don't need to come here and post "field reports" every time I get a strippers phone number.

You also took the time to unblock me after you specifically stated you were "getting rid of negativity".

NOBODY cares that you claim to make 6 figures or bang 15 women at a time. Because you are literally an empty face on a forum except for your Anime avatars. Perhaps we WOULD care if you could back up a damn thing you said. But you can't.

And @9Volt is going to have a field day with you now because you're the biggest phony of all.

How in God's name are you going to take life advice from random strangers on the net who can't figure out how to use the ignore user button.

 

[BeTheChange]

Listen guys, this is one of the few places in the world that Men can come to vent. I come here to vent at times and others do as well, including BlueAlpha.

I just love how guys play this "everything is going right with me, everything is going wrong with you" card when a guy comes here and vents about whatever. This is supposed to be a forum where we HELP and SUPPORT each other, not tear each other down.

Why is BlueAlpha venting? Well, maybe because like MOST men his age, he has to go through a lot of shyt like:

- Trying to build a decent career
- Trying to juggle cost of living
- Trying to juggle finances
- Trying to juggle understanding women
- Trying to find the time to workout
- Trying to find decent role models or inspirations

If he wants to VENT, let him VENT! Let him get that shyt OUT! Why is everybody so damn judgmental around here, like YOU have it all figured out, "your life" is so perfect, etc.?

We all here have something we are wrestling with, man I can't stand these "I'm holier than you" type of mentalities you guys get in around here at times.

Brother, respectfully STFU and stop AWing.

There's a big difference between venting and specifically deride and call out other forum users. BlueAlpha does the latter and any intelligent man can see this.

I'm not sure why he chooses to focus on me tbh. I've been very honest about my failings here and my struggles (just check some of my NC posts, that h0e brought me to my knees lol) and ironically BlueAlpha is happy to believe those posts because they show me at my worst, but then walking away from a smoking hot chick, getting over my breakup and my successes thereafter...nah I must be lying about those right! This selective belief of my posts is laughable and I can see no other explanation for it but jealousy and an anger at ones own failings in life.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

Brother, respectfully STFU and stop AWing.

There's a big difference between venting and specifically deride and call out other forum users. BlueAlpha does the latter and any intelligent man can see this.

I'm not sure why he chooses to focus on me tbh. I've been very honest about my failings here and my struggles (just check some of my NC posts, that h0e brought me to my knees lol) and ironically BlueAlpha is happy to believe those posts because they show me at my worst, but then walking away from a smoking hot chick, getting over my breakup and my successes thereafter...nah I must be lying about those right! This selective belief of my posts is laughable and I can see no other explanation for it but jealousy and an anger at ones own failings in life.

You are such a phony it's beyond belief.

I haven't addressed you in months. You sought me out in this thread and did what you always do, some passive-aggressive schtick where you put me down in order to bring yourself up. And you disguise it as "just trying to help a brother out", but your condescending tone supercedes it.

Let's face it, just just never really got over the fact that I suggested your schizophrenic diatribes in the NC thread weren't healthy and reminded me of myself when I was in a very bad place. Since then you've had it out for me.

You seem to be over her now which is great, but now you're the equivalent to that girl on social media tweeting that she "has the best BF/bestie/life and is so blessed". A few people like the post but the entire readership knows she full of it and a total wreck.

Nobody doing as well as you claim to be is so nasty to others. THATS how I know you're a faker, not jealousy.

 

[BeTheChange]

You are such a phony it's beyond belief.

I haven't addressed you in months. You sought me out in this thread and did what you always do, some passive-aggressive schtick where you put me down in order to bring yourself up. And you disguise it as "just trying to help a brother out", but your condescending tone supercedes it.

Let's face it, just just never really got over the fact that I suggested your schizophrenic diatribes in the NC thread weren't healthy and reminded me of myself when I was in a very bad place. Since then you've had it out for me.

You seem to be over her now which is great, but now you're the equivalent to that girl on social media tweeting that she "has the best BF/bestie/life and is so blessed". A few people like the post but the entire readership knows she full of it and a total wreck.

Nobody doing as well as you claim to be is so nasty to others. THATS how I know you're a faker, not jealousy.

LOL ok mate. Projection at its finest. We can all see who's throwing the insults and who needs to really take a hard look at themselves.

Actually, yes you got me...im lying about everything! There. Feel better now?

 

[dasein]

On a tangential note, I have found a couple of times over the years that a woman having a "life coach" is just as much of a flag as her being on certain meds. In those instances, I felt like the "life coach" was a cheap shrink for her to bounce her "me-talk" off of, and usually to my disadvantage. Going forward, if I hear "my life coach said..." it translates to "my astrologer said..." with the related lowering of attraction that entails.

A rule of thumb is that people can be taken more seriously when they talk about things they did or are doing as opposed to talking about whom they are "listening to" or reading. Great ideas are the most worthless things in the world and it took me decades to learn that. I didn't have the net and advance notice of mental traps, you do. Don't repeat my mistakes.

 

[devilkingx2]

The threads about my BPD were from over 2 years ago and I have barely mentioned her since. You actually don't know anything about me other than I had one bad job and one bad relationship, because I don't need to come here and post "field reports" every time I get a strippers phone number.

that statement is deeply hypocritical in the context of you trying to call other people frauds in this thread.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

that statement is deeply hypocritical in the context of you trying to call other people frauds in this thread.

No, it isn't.

BeTheChange likes to assume that I don't talk to or hook up with women because I don't talk about women a lot on this forum. That's because I get a lot of other things out of this forum besides over-analyzing every little interaction with a woman.

I also don't feel the need to come here and pat myself on the back every time I get a girl's number and get into a big dlck measuring contest like a lot of posters here. That might lead an ignorant fool to believe that I don't actually talk to any girls because I don't follow the SoSuave protocol, but they'd be wrong.

Get it now???

 

[9Volt]

No, it isn't.

BeTheChange likes to assume that I don't talk to or hook up with women because I don't talk about women a lot on this forum. That's because I get a lot of other things out of this forum besides over-analyzing every little interaction with a woman.

I also don't feel the need to come here and pat myself on the back every time I get a girl's number and get into a big dlck measuring contest like a lot of posters here. That might lead an ignorant fool to believe that I don't actually talk to any girls because I don't follow the SoSuave protocol, but they'd be wrong.

Get it now???

They don't. Because anything other than what they believe can't be possible.

Unless you come across as a cartoon character.

 

[Papa_smu]

Let me play devil's advocate and say that there is good life coaches out there that offer more value then success stories and mantras. Hell, most of them out there wouldn't consider themselves to be life coaches. They're just guys (and gals) that have tried more, and failed a lot more then anyone of us. Yet this gave them the opportunity to demonstrate their awesomeness and give back in the form of coaching

Here are those folks I mention:

John Sonmez - He offers advice to other programmers ranging from career to dating. And most of his material is pretty solid stuff. The best part is that he offers a lot of his material for free through Youtube.

Ross Enamait - He's a boxing trainer from Connecticut that has written several books on fitness. What makes him a "life coach" is his philosophy of making due of what you have and focusing on what works. Again, like John Sonmez much his material is free through a blog format.

Christian LeBlanc - A travel blogger that quit his job right after college to see the world. He maybe just another travel blogger, but he sure does a good job to show the challenges of constantly traveling. Though he doesn't just tell you the feel good stuff, he displays it through his travels.



These guys aren't life coaches but they sure as hell do a good job being one. And they do that conveying life lessons in the material they teach.

 

[9Volt]

my ode to the life coaches of SS. I'm tired of playing in the Pee wee leagues.

Put me in coach. I'm ready to play. Today. Or maybe not. I might just go my own way.

 

[devilkingx2]

No, it isn't.

BeTheChange likes to assume that I don't talk to or hook up with women because I don't talk about women a lot on this forum. That's because I get a lot of other things out of this forum besides over-analyzing every little interaction with a woman.

I also don't feel the need to come here and pat myself on the back every time I get a girl's number and get into a big dlck measuring contest like a lot of posters here. That might lead an ignorant fool to believe that I don't actually talk to any girls because I don't follow the SoSuave protocol, but they'd be wrong.

Get it now???

so... anyone who mentions the girls they date is a fraud, and authentic men don't talk about it? uh... that's a little strange

 

[Colossus]

Can't help but notice the Youtube ads from all the "life coaches" popping up when I try to watch a video lately.

These guys (Tai Lopez, Corey Wayne, Tony Robbins, Brandon Burchard, Deepak Chopra) are a dime a dozen and all share similar traits and tactics.

1. An unproven rags to riches story.
$47 in my bank account to managing 10 multi-million dollar companies, bankrupt to 4.2 million in 18 months. (Meanwhile in the case of Tai Lopez, he's a proven fraud as he rents all his homes and cars)

2. Pearly white teeth
For some reason all of these people spent $10,000 on a perfect smile of porcelain, the same material your toilet is made out of

3. Few or no credentials
These guys rarely have actual degrees in psychology or science (Chopra does) but still make wild, outlandish claims about the nature of human psychology. They are basically psychologists who just happened to not go to school for psychology.

4. Wildly overpriced products
Corey Wayne, who is lauded on this forum, charges $1,000 an hour for a Skype session. In it, he gives you questionable and even counter-productive advice that you could exceed just by reading this forum. Tai Lopez charges $67 PER MONTH to regurgitate very long stories full of hot air.

5. Smarmy aura and tactics
All these guys offer a free sample of some sort, a money back guarantee, use fake testimonials on their website, and are very off-putting with their faux positivity.

6. Lack of content
It's all cliches and hot air. Nothing but vague generalities about "believing in yourself", "as you think you shall become", "setting goals every day" as though a poor person in the hood or in a trailer can just start to believe really hard and a million dollars will appear.

They prey on gullible, vulnerable people with sheep mentalities. You can watch footage from their seminars where people just jump around in place and scream like idiots, or in Tony Robbins' case walk across hot coals to demonstrate some sort of metaphor about overcoming fear.

There are a FEW exceptions to this rule. You will occasionally find sound advice with raw data and numbers. Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kyosaki comes to mind. In it he teaches you the fundamentals of real estate and passive income. So before you purchase, do your homework. Skim the book if you have it in front of you or read the negative reviews before you purchase online to see what real customers are saying.

In short, screw these scam artists. Don't give them your money.

Good day.

Good post BA.

I think thanks to YouTube and the era of internet dissemination, it's so easy to capitalize on people who are uninspired, have no real goals, self-worth, and have never been tested. Blank slates are impressionable. I mean lets be honest the millennial generation is probably the most worthless, unskilled generation we've had in the last century. They are the generation of soft times. In the western world we enjoy the highest standard of living that has probably ever existed in human history. Everything we want and need is more or less on tap. This creates soft people, and soft people create problems out of boredom. You know, like what gender am I going to be today, how am I going to be offended today, what nebulous entity is victimizing me today.

These "life coaches" arent offering a skilled service for money, like say a gunsmith, or a doctor, or CPA. I'm not above paying for advice, but I want that advice to be credentialed, validated, and proven. Even the term "life coach" just reeks of weakness.

I think a good rule of thumb in life is to not trust anybody who is selling anything that isnt a skilled, validated service. A book is a little different, that's just a compendium of methods, facts, or someone's opinions and that is implied when you buy the book. But I find most self-help books are 90% fluff and 10% useful material. I struggled to write 100 pages in my little e-book because the core concepts are really all you need.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

Good post BA.

I think thanks to YouTube and the era of internet dissemination, it's so easy to capitalize on people who are uninspired, have no real goals, self-worth, and have never been tested. Blank slates are impressionable. I mean lets be honest the millennial generation is probably the most worthless, unskilled generation we've had in the last century. They are the generation of soft times. In the western world we enjoy the highest standard of living that has probably ever existed in human history. Everything we want and need is more or less on tap. This creates soft people, and soft people create problems out of boredom. You know, like what gender am I going to be today, how am I going to be offended today, what nebulous entity is victimizing me today.

These "life coaches" arent offering a skilled service for money, like say a gunsmith, or a doctor, or CPA. I'm not above paying for advice, but I want that advice to be credentialed, validated, and proven. Even the term "life coach" just reeks of weakness.

I think a good rule of thumb in life is to not trust anybody who is selling anything that isnt a skilled, validated service. A book is a little different, that's just a compendium of methods, facts, or someone's opinions and that is implied when you buy the book. But I find most self-help books are 90% fluff and 10% useful material. I struggled to write 100 pages in my little e-book because the core concepts are really all you need.

Exactly. This is a near perfect post.

You can read a 600 pg hardcover with about 10 pages of worthwhile material. The other 590 are fluffy cliches and buzzwords, and anectodal stories.

"Quit your dream and follow your passion"
"Set goals for yourself every day"
"As you think, you shall become"
"Never give up"

A lot of these guys also make metaphysical claims about "the universe" that are stupid and unscientific, that the universe is a conscious entity and it "aligns" for you, or that positive and negative "energies" affect your reality.

All you have to do is watch videos of these people jumping up and down, clapping screaming at a seminar and you can't help but think to yourself "I can't see how this is getting people closer to quitting their 9-5 to start a business or traveling the world. In fact, you just paid $1000 to have a guy to tell you what we'd tell you for free."

They are NOT telling you HOW to get rich, only the foundational mindset it takes to get rich. This is like a leasing office building a new apartment complex, but they stop at the floor yet still want to charge you for the full lease.

This is why Rich Dad, Poor Dad as an example is a quality exception to this rule. It was heavy on examples and arithmetic, and taught me a fair amount about money.

What's the name of your e-book? I wrote one too about masculinity in the corporate world. It only scratches the surface and it's 42 pages long. I'd like to expand on it more, but I don't think I could get it past 100 pages tops.

 

[MatureDJ]

4. Wildly overpriced products
Corey Wayne, who is lauded on this forum, charges $1,000 an hour for a Skype session. In it, he gives you questionable and even counter-productive advice that you could exceed just by reading this forum.

Aaron Clarey (A33hole Consulting) is a lot cheaper and gives very sound advice.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

so... anyone who mentions the girls they date is a fraud, and authentic men don't talk about it? uh... that's a little strange

Once again, you missed the point. It's HOW you talk about it.

The men on this forum who claim to be the MOST successful people are the most rigid and nasty guys around. They put other posters down and are way over the top in their bravado. In many aspects of life, the dogs with the loudest bark have no bite, and empty barrels make the most noise.

Take Rollo Tomassi as the opposite. A guy who started on this forum and achieved mini-celebrity status and made a killing writing a book about the concepts on this forum. He would never talk to others here the way the chest thumpers do, who fancy themselves Wolves of Wall Street on an anonymous internet forum, which is fine, but expect to back up these outlandish claims when you pick an argument.

The guys on this forum making the largest claims for themselves carry themselves in a way that is inconsistent with the behavior you'd expect from a guy doing that well. That's why it seems very inauthentic.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I threw my Corey Wayne book away when I realized he is a blatant rip-off of Doc Love, who has a much funnier, more accurate product in the dating realm. Corey Wayne should be sued for his blatant plagiarism.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

The famous " I just went on a date with a HB9" Uhhh no you didn't

 

[Tenacity]

A lot of these guys also make metaphysical claims about "the universe" that are stupid and unscientific, that the universe is a conscious entity and it "aligns" for you, or that positive and negative "energies" affect your reality.

Lol excellent analysis bro.

I love these Law of Attraction/The Secret/The Prosperity Gospel preaching idiots who promote this shyt to mainly people that are WORKING CLASS, who all dream to one day be Middle Class or Higher Class.

- I've always been of the fundamental belief, that people always go to God or the SuperNatural, for help with things they don't understand the functionality of.

- You routinely will see working class or poor people "praying" to God for HELP with financial related issues, because the dumb fvcks don't know anything about supply/demand in terms of marketplace skills that pay a premium, they know nothing about budgeting, and they know nothing about investing.....so they take it all to God or the Super Natural to "make a way out of no way". It's stupid.

- The people who fundamentally understand how something works, are usually the people who are in control and manipulating other people to their advantage, even using God or the SuperNatural in a way, to help influence the sheep. Mega Church Pastors get away with this shyt every Sunday. It's disgusting.

Newsflash folks....there's no LAW OF ATTRACTION. You can think positive all fvcking day long, if you don't have the right connections, skills, networks, and capital.....you aren't going to be Middle Class, Higher Class, nor Rich. You will continue to be Working Class/a $400 emergency away from financial ruin.