BC Journal - Please share your thoughts

[izza]

Hello,

Today, I kicked off BC to a pretty good start - it was nothing amazing, but I was happy with it, and I look forward to tomorrow.

In fact, I kicked off the day by starting a conversation with a woman in a bookstore. She was 30 something and a bit wrinkled, but I was glad to get things started right. I also said hello to two HB sand some guy off the street started talking to me. There were probably others that I'm forgetting, since saying hello is almost habitual now. Four down, I'm ready for more.

Izza

 

[izza]

Today was a pretty good day. I went biking with my sister and we both greeted people, about half in french, half in english. We got some funny looks, seeing as how we were doing this in Chicago, where almost nobody speaks a word of french. A lot of people said hola back. I forgot to keep count exactly, but there were at least 8, making a total of 11 so far.

I'm very happy with my results so far. One thing I'm noticing is that I'm really afraid to say hellos that might lead to a conversation. I'm fine with hellos as I'm walking by, or zooming by on a bike. It's the ones side by side before crossing a street or in a store that are really scary. I'd like to go out tomorrow and do some of those hellos, and maybe get some conversations. All right, wish me luck everyone. Best of luck to you.

Izza

 

[izza]

Damn, there are no HBs anywhere, though a few MILFs here and there hahaha. Anyway, I said hello to 7 people today, totalling to 18, and started a conversation with some guy. That was pretty cool. One of my goals of BC is to take an interest in all people - to become more of an omnivore so to speak. Of course this doesn't preclude me wanting to give hot women the gift of knowing me

All right, later gentlemen, I hope all is going well. I'm enjoying talking to people, and saying hello to the HBs - though the latter is scary sometimes. I really demand too much perfection from myself I think. Anywho, take care,

Izza

 

[izza]

Hello all,

I got 6 more today, making 24. Three HBs, though. Damn and this one HOOOOT girl did not say hi back. Stung a little, but I was glad I paid her the compliment of saying hello. Anyway, I'm out, take care.

Izza

 

[izza]

Yo,

Got four hi's today just on my bike. I really made the effort for them, yelling out to people, and holding the EC until they said something. All of them were hot too, so that was key. So that makes 28.

Izza

 

[izza]

Yo,

Got four hi's today just on my bike. I really made the effort for them, yelling out to people, and holding the EC until they said something. All of them were hot too, so that was key. So that makes 28.

Izza

 

[izza]

Yo,

Today was amazing! I got 12 hellos just from riding my bike to and from work. Personally, I only count the ones where they say hello back or clearly smile in acknowledgement. Oh man, today was so exciting! I said hello to every hot babe I saw, and it felt so good to know that my hellos were validating people and making their days brighter. It was just unbelievable to say hello to all these people. I think the best part was that, even though the people that didn't say hello back hurt a bit, it felt good to know that I still made their day a bit better in some way.

My god, I don't know why but that was incredible. I'm really excited to get 10 more tomorrow, and close out week one.

Izza

 

[izza]

And so, I have said 50 hellos, and received my goal of 50 acknowledgements. The acknowledgments add the challenge of forcing you to combine hellos with eye contact, because often people will only acknowledge you if you stare at them after a hello and force them to respond hahaha. That was so much fun, I want to do week 1 again :woo:

I'll post my overall thoughts on Xanga, but I cannot emphasize enough how important it was to focus on giving rather than receiving. Senor Fingers mentioned this in a post recently, and I think he makes a great point: if you look to women to validate you, you put so much on the line. Only you can truly validate yourself by living a life you want to live outside of women. In the same way, if you seek hellos from people in order to get validation for yourself, you put your own sense of worth on the line with every hello.

With these hellos I focused on making other people's day better, if only because I acknowledged another human's existence (something so rare in city life). Even those that said nothing back, I still succeeded in acknowledging them and improving their day, and so I felt minimal rejection. Nice.

Looking ahead: the next week involves 10 conversations. I had a really fascinating conversation tonight at choir practice with a guy named Tom, and I introduced myself to some cute asian girl. Both were money. I got some heavy EC from a cute chick in choir, so I'm planning to give her the gift of a conversation with me next practice.

All right so 10 conversations. Wow, I'm very nervous about this part. Asking people for digits is pretty easy... I've gotten three rejections in my life and it's just another compliment to pay someone, no matter what they say, I succeed in complimenting them. But conversations are for me harder. I wonder why.

More later,

Izza

 

[animal crackers]

Good stuff

Hey man keep it up! The boot camp is a great way to realize there is nothing to be scared of when you talk to girls.

I suggest you go out with a friend to a crowded public area and just say hi to girls. BUT, don't just leave after saying hi. Conversations aren't hard if there's stuff around you to comment on.

Just be normal ya know? "What are you guys doing tonight?" That car is sweet I gotta get some chromed out rims....Where do you guys live around. etc...

It helps me to get in a rhythm. Talk to x number of people and the next girls you approach you're already warmed up and you just talk effortlessly.

I see you're in Chicago, hit me up on AIM: EZeagleEZ

laterz


animal crackers

 

[izza]

Cheers AC, thanks for the encouragement.

All right, today I tried to start a conversation - these two girls walked by speaking in French, so I asked them a few questions, they basically walked off. Man, I was furious and so disappointed. Oh well, I still gave them the gift of someone else's attention, and this is a numbers game, so I think I succeeded overall.

I want to keep greeting people, because they are like food for conversations. Now I want to begin converting some of these hellos into conversations.

Hmm, overall I dealt with that disappointment well, I look forward to more conversations. My god I am learning so much, too bad this section only lasts a week.

Best of luck to all,

Izza

 

[izza]

Today I got my first conversation. Well, sorta, but I don't care, I'm counting it! I was looking at this outdoor booksellers books, and we talked for about a minute, mostly about nothing - like swimming in Lake Michigan (my god I love that lake). It was funny, I must have seemed so nervous.. I answered one or two questions then shifted the focus to him really abruptly. He seemed almost disoriented. I think my style of getting to know people is a little different. I have a pretty profound ability to talk about nothing - swimming in lakes, the weather, etc, and make it interesting. I don't think there's a huge rush for me to shift the focus to other people. Anyway, 1 conversation, 9 to go.

Also, I might break off from the group and take my time on this week, because conversing with people is hard for me! I want to get this down pat. Later,

Izza

 

[izza]

Yo,

Got one convo with a cute canadian today, but she was leaving town so I didn't pursue. Haha, I should have though.

Izza

 

[izza]

I conversed with someone new in choir. But still, this approaching thing is not going well. I'm going to repeat this week until I get it right. It's not enough for me to heave at the finish line, getting barely 10, or even barely 5. I want to own week two, I want to kick its @ss!

I feel unbelievably frustrated and despondent, but I will never give up!

Izza

 

[Mikers]

I like your spirit man, yeah dont give up... things can only get better from here. Try and make goals to speak to like 10 people a day... can be anyone.. you'll be suprised how easy it is.

 

[isotope]

yeah keep up the good work.

that sick, despondent feeling in your stomach (that you get when you get ignored or rejected) will eventyally go away.

you just have to develop a harder shell.

i mean think about it, THEY are the one being rude and mean. All you did was try to say hi or start a convo, and they ignore you. That amuses me, that some people are so stuck up or unfriendly that they would ignore you. So i just laugh it off, because i know I am a better, kinder person than they are.

and like you said, you are paying them a compliment. even if they reject it or dont respond, you should still be happy that you paid them the compliment that YOU FELT like doing. Because you are a MAN and you do whatever you feel like.

 

[izza]

Hey cheers Isotope and Mikers,

Thanks for the encouragement guys. I always like hearing when others have traveled my path, and overcome my barriers. Isotope you could not be more right about doing whatever I want - it makes me feel much more powerful to be asking nothing from these women, to be doing this in part just to brighten their days.

My new philosophy on life is that you can have anything you want - you just can't always have it when you want it. To get something, you have to persevere. Today, I went looking on the path home for a conversation (I had just worked from 10am - 7pm), but there were no sitting targets on the lakefront. Sigh, well one more day to get 6 conversations hahaha.

When I did week one, I kicked its @ss and it felt great. I was so pumped up. Now, since I feel like hellos are easy, I can do them anytime, even when I'm not particularly in the mood; that is, they have become habit. I want to find this same feeling with conversations. I want to feel comfortable approaching joe schmoe - I want to kick week 2s ass. I will do this week until I get 10 conversations a week for several weeks - until I feel like I have this sh!t nailed.

I will not stop until I get this right - besides, I wanna be in good "shape" for France

Later everybody, don't give up!

Izza

 

[izza]

Ladies and Gentlemen, drum roll please...

Today was a huge day. I was working all day as usual (a job I like well enough), but in the middle, my boss sent me on an errand. So I was in the store, and I got to talking to some guy - conversation 1, and then I saw some cute girl in the store too, so I approached her. I sorta pretended I was reading sheet music, that was lame. I should have just walked right up and talked to her, none of this awkward pretending business, hehe. Anyway, she had just been to Montreal (where I lived two months ago), so we got to talking. She was a pianist too, but a sophmore, and I wasn't hugely interested. Whatever, maybe it was best to get the number, maybe not - WHO CARES! The conversation was great!

Later in the day, I was saying hello to everyone on the street, and one woman stopped me to ask for directions. That was the third conversation of the day, on top of getting to know people from my choir.

There were a bunch of situations where I was like "look another chick, I should approach her too," but I was like 3's enough for one day. I wanted to focus on celebrating a great day, and not kick myself for not jumping from zero to hero in a matter of hours.

So today calls for celebration. I'm not sure what I'll do to celebrate, but I'm proud of myself... my efforts are paying off.

The plan now: I'm going to do this week again, and this time I'm going to get 10 conversations, and I'm going to approach more people. In short, I'm going to do this week until it feels as easy as the hellos do now. Hellos are just ridiculously easy now - I'm going to start doing them in French, and on foot (I bike everywhere, and so I zoom by everybody).

All right people, good luck and take care. This is so exciting!

Izza

 

[Movin on up]

Congrats..FearTheFlea here...and if I didn't just get off work at 4 am I'd take ya out for a beer to congratulate you sir. Don't just stop at 3, just keep going .

 

[Max0r]

Congratulations you ****er, you are ahead of me in week 2. Hell it is week 3 already. Sure I sarged two sets, but I'm not going to count that because I'm macho.

 

[izza]

Cheers guys, thanks for the encouragement. Today I took a little break from BCing. I said hello to people, I kept that up, but I'm preparing to do week 2 again starting tomorrow. It was pretty funny though, I biked way out of my way to say hello to this one HB - haha, she knew she was flattered (even though she didn't show it ). More BC tomorrow.

Max0r: I'm doing week 2 again, wanna join me?

Izza