article: Gen Z’s Romance Gap: Why Nearly Half of Young Men Aren’t Dating

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
Last edited:

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,545
Reaction score
11,399
Gen Z and Gen Y/Millennials have struggled with sexlessness. That's problematic.

 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,747
Reaction score
3,198
Location
California
My Zoomer ex-GF told me I was the horniest guy she'd ever been with. I assumed I was a super horn dog. Now. Maybe I'm just average horny. But compared to the Gen Z guys she's dated before, I'm super horny.
 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,747
Reaction score
3,198
Location
California
Teen love is great, but not 'Make or break'. I was a HS nerd geek who hung out with the gamer dorks. My first make-out was 18 and I also got a BJ at at 18. But. I didn't lose my V-card until almost 20 when a girl basically pinned me down and insisted i fvck her.
I think if you can get it before 25, you'll be fine.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
Teen love is great, but not 'Make or break'. I was a HS nerd geek who hung out with the gamer dorks. My first make-out was 18 and I also got a BJ at at 18. But. I didn't lose my V-card until almost 20 when a girl basically pinned me down and insisted i fvck her.
I think if you can get it before 25, you'll be fine.
It's not the breaking of the V-card that is the make-or-break - it's that being able to get women at that age is a correlatative attribute with being able to get women after that, and so obviously, being an incel-tier man in later life correlates with having been incel-tier in the teenage years (I'm counting undergrad college as "teen" here). The orphaning is due to the incel's poor genetics, which obvious Raphael here in the movie is wonderful example of.

Now that said, an orphaned man can ascend in later life by either becoming extraordinarily wealthy or talented in one of the arts, but this way is rare (I shall presume that anyone that is athletically gifted enough to succeed there is already Chad-tier); however, it is attainable for a regular schlub by simply going full Beta and getting with a single mommy :mad:, or by simply aging into older women by dating women his own age and letting time denude (pun intended) such women's pickiness.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
My Zoomer ex-GF told me I was the horniest guy she'd ever been with. I assumed I was a super horn dog. Now. Maybe I'm just average horny. But compared to the Gen Z guys she's dated before, I'm super horny.
I've had more than 1 woman tell me I have a problem with my hormones, although in the end, they let me hit it (but with more resistance than I thought I should have had :mad:).
 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,747
Reaction score
3,198
Location
California
It's not the breaking of the V-card that is the make-or-break - it's that being able to get women at that age is a correlatative attribute with being able to get women after that, and so obviously, being an incel-tier man in later life correlates with having been incel-tier in the teenage years (I'm counting undergrad college as "teen" here). The orphaning is due to the incel's poor genetics, which obvious Raphael here in the movie is wonderful example of.

Now that said, an orphaned man can ascend in later life by either becoming extraordinarily wealthy or talented in one of the arts, but this way is rare (I shall presume that anyone that is athletically gifted enough to succeed there is already Chad-tier); however, it is attainable for a regular schlub by simply going full Beta and getting with a single mommy :mad:, or by simply aging into older women by dating women his own age and letting time denude (pun intended) such women's pickiness.
I get what you’re saying. I agree. If one hasn’t gotten female interest by, say, 22. one will have a tough road to hoe.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
14,684
Reaction score
15,846
Because like everything else in life, they are lazy and want women to fall into their lap without much effort
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,776
Reaction score
3,735
I've been looking at some old episodes of Degrassi HIgh and today sounds very differently from when gen-Xes were young and there was an AIDS scare and condom dispensing machines were placed in High School Washrooms (ie again as depicted by the TV-show, not in real life at the High School I went to). There was a sense that teenagers were out of control, hypersexualized and girls were getting pregnant in their teens and catching AIDS all over the place, etc.... This sence continued until the 00s. However, I guess today is different and the pendulum is NOW swinging in the opposite direction. Part of me I guess is time-capsuled so I have this wierd effect of remembering the attitudes and issues prevalant when I was a teen/young adult and seeing that juxtaposed in the modern world is an interesting thing indeed.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
I've been looking at some old episodes of Degrassi HIgh and today sounds very differently from when gen-Xes were young and there was an AIDS scare and condom dispensing machines were placed in High School Washrooms (ie again as depicted by the TV-show, not in real life at the High School I went to). There was a sense that teenagers were out of control, hypersexualized and girls were getting pregnant in their teens and catching AIDS all over the place, etc.... This sence continued until the 00s. However, I guess today is different and the pendulum is NOW swinging in the opposite direction. Part of me I guess is time-capsuled so I have this wierd effect of remembering the attitudes and issues prevalant when I was a teen/young adult and seeing that juxtaposed in the modern world is an interesting thing indeed.
For some reason, I know about this TV show; I think it was on PBS. There was one strand of a story in which a 13 year junior-Chad had knocked up some chick. Mogged even by PBS. :mad:
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,776
Reaction score
3,735
For some reason, I know about this TV show; I think it was on PBS. There was one strand of a story in which a 13 year junior-Chad had knocked up some chick. Mogged even by PBS. :mad:
Are you talking about the Next Generation show, First Season, Last Episode that had Ashley stoned, then saying a bunch of mean things after the fact, like a nuclear bomb on her social life, alienating all of her friends and turning off her ex-boyfriend (ie Jimmy aka Drake guy who acted in as the guy Amogged by the 'Chad" guy and Ashley at the party.

That is like only part of the show I fished out to watch in the Next Generation. It was an epic Season One ending.
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,776
Reaction score
3,735
I get what you’re saying. I agree. If one hasn’t gotten female interest by, say, 22. one will have a tough road to hoe.
Was "hoe" intended as a pun there? That's assuming if one has money to buy himself out of that scenario.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
No. No pun intended. I like using obscure, archaic terms.
When a pun could be intended, but not actually extended, the writer should write (pun not intended). I am always writing stuff that could be a pun, and am careful to denote the intention, unless of course it's supposed to be a joke, like:
There were 2 peanuts walking down the street, and 1 peanut was assaulted ... peanut.
 

GoodMan32

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 14, 2022
Messages
1,727
Reaction score
502
Gen Z and Gen Y/Millennials have struggled with sexlessness. That's problematic.


Pretty sure a major reason for Gen Y/Z sexlessness is the fact technology made a lot of Gen Y/Z socially awkward. You (one of the oldest Millennials) have said before that even in your college years, you started to see the writing on the wall that inceldom would become common (as a lot of male students lost the will to do in-person approaches once MySpace and Facebook came out)

I was starting high school the year you graduated college. The tech-induced social awkwardness corrupted my age cohort even more (as it hit us at a younger age)

A Gen Z guy 10 years younger than me would have been corrupted even further by technology.
 

GoodMan32

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 14, 2022
Messages
1,727
Reaction score
502
Fascinating how the 2008 statistic was basically the same as the 1989 statistic...yet skyrocketed ever since 2008.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,545
Reaction score
11,399
Pretty sure a major reason for Gen Y/Z sexlessness is the fact technology made a lot of Gen Y/Z socially awkward. You (one of the oldest Millennials) have said before that even in your college years, you started to see the writing on the wall that inceldom would become common (as a lot of male students lost the will to do in-person approaches once MySpace and Facebook came out)

I was starting high school the year you graduated college. The tech-induced social awkwardness corrupted my age cohort even more (as it hit us at a younger age)

A Gen Z guy 10 years younger than me would have been corrupted even further by technology.
I did see the writing on the wall throughout my college years (2001-2005) that inceldom was going to become common.

One of the things I saw on campus is that most men who tried to live the "player" lifestyle and seduce numerous women were generally sexless men. When I say generally sexless men, I'm referring to both men who were completely sexless (the worst cases) or men who often failed to get sex but would occasionally have same night sex from an approach at a college party/bar or another instance of shorter term sex. It was clear to me that a good portion of men on many "Hot Girl U" party campus were invisible/barely visible to women. I didn't have a phrase to explain it then but what I was seeing was the Pareto Principle in action. That's the 80-20 rule.

Most men outside of the Top 10-20% had to get some sort of girlfriend while on campus in order to get regular access to sex or they would be watching internet porn. This is something both @Jesse Pinkman and I have mentioned on the college threads below in the past.



I started to see the erosion of social skills as early as my freshman year dorm when I saw a lot of people using AOL Instant Messenger (a precursor to text messaging) be widely used for communication. MySpace and Facebook started to come in around my senior year in the 2004-2005 school year and changed this more. Online dating websites weren't commonly used by college students when I was on campus as they were de-stigmatizing more so for the 20s/30s post-college crowd at that time.

Fascinating how the 2008 statistic was basically the same as the 1989 statistic...yet skyrocketed ever since 2008.
That chart only illustrates the changes in men 18-29 reporting no sex since their 18th birthday. That isn't a measurement of virginity but a measure of incel status. It's possible respondents had sex prior to age 18 and incel status common means one year or more without sex involuntarily.

The chart is more of a measure of late Millennial sexlessness than Gen Z sexlessness, as the chart ends in 2018. In 2018, the oldest Gen Z's were only 21. 22-29 year olds in 2018 were Millennials. Sexlessness and incel status took root during the Gen Y/Millennial generation and has persisted into Gen Z. It would be interesting to see where long term sexlessness is now in 2023-2024.

The simplistic answer to the skyrocketing since 2008 would be the smartphone. Apple's first iPhone was released in 2007. The first generation iPhone was not the first overall smartphone but it was the first smartphone to change the overall cellular phone market. The popularity of the iPhone starting in 2007 made it necessary for men to have smartphone to ask women out in person by 2010.

Around 2010, if you were in the field doing approaches and you didn't have a smartphone when collecting digits for the first time, the woman would be repulsed and she would seriously consider ending the interaction then or maybe giving the digits then ghosting. That's how important having a smartphone became. Additionally, if a guy set up a date on a website then (like Match, Okcupid, or Plenty of Fish), he'd still be expected to have a smartphone. Sooner or later (likely during the first or second date), the woman would see what cell phone he owned and if he didn't own a smartphone, she would ghost.

The smartphone gaining popularity a lot of things about the mating atmosphere but a lot of those trends were already in motion.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,293
Reaction score
4,666
I did see the writing on the wall throughout my college years (2001-2005) that inceldom was going to become common.

One of the things I saw on campus is that most men who tried to live the "player" lifestyle and seduce numerous women were generally sexless men. When I say generally sexless men, I'm referring to both men who were completely sexless (the worst cases) or men who often failed to get sex but would occasionally have same night sex from an approach at a college party/bar or another instance of shorter term sex. It was clear to me that a good portion of men on many "Hot Girl U" party campus were invisible/barely visible to women. I didn't have a phrase to explain it then but what I was seeing was the Pareto Principle in action. That's the 80-20 rule.
It's OVER for HotGirlUStudentCels.
 
Top