Analyze this Crazy Woman's Online Dating Profile

[Calvin]

Here is a copy of a crazy woman's online dating profile from 13 years ago. Please analyze/comment on whether this is a quality woman.

I am: A 27-year-old Female
Living in: Charlotte, NC
Seeking: Male for Friendship first!

I AM…
Height: 5’5”
Body Style: Athletic, 140lbs
Appearance: Long Blonde Hair, Hazel Eyes, Big Smile
Race/Ethnicity: White
Religion: Christian, Active Methodist who attends Church regularly

Education: Undergraduate degree in Physiology, working on MBA
Occupation: Medical Consultant
Income: Working hard reaps its rewards

Marital Status: Single, never married
Has Children: No, just a fantastic golden retriever
Wants Children: Yes, but not anytime soon
Drinking: Socially, but never drunk
Smoking: Never, it’s disgusting

What do I like to do?
Anything but sit still. I’m definitely a mover and a doer. I love the outdoors, theater, traveling overseas, movies, golf, and college football. I teach aerobics and kickboxing at the Y and am very active in my church. I also sing semi-professionally (Mostly for friends weddings or social events.) I am a proud homeowner, so I am probably one of the few females that can climb a ladder, mow my grass and fix leaks, but it’s all fun! I travel all the time for business, so I love to eat out. I’ll try anything once and most things twice! I also love the water and I am about to buy some land on Mountain Island Lake.

Some of my favorite musicians/albums…
Anything on 107.9 or 91.9 (Christian). I also like Sting, Sarah McLachlan, Carolyn Arends, Alison Krauss, Jaci Velasquez, Barenaked Ladies, Dave Matthews, Jamiroquai, Harry Connick and Third Day.

I’d also like to say…
I am looking for a CHRISTIAN. Someone who truly knows what it means to have a relationship with God. That’s not to say I am a “bible banger,” but I want someone who is mature enough in his faith to pray with me and support me. I am also looking for an educated, articulate, motivated individual. Couch potato’s need not reply. I have a witty sense of humor and love a good joke. I want to find a guy who loves life, who is passionate about learning and who is always working to improve himself. Although I love sports, I don’t consider the ideal date a bucket of beer and wings in a sports bar. I work hard and I play hard and I expect the same from a mate. I would rather date someone who has the ambition to succeed rather than the funds to prove it. I do well for myself, so I am not looking for your money, but at the same time, I want to find someone who can contribute to the “cookie jar” equally.

I am a genuinely warm person and what you see (or read) is what you get. No mind games or antics. I am very close to my family and definitely want a family of my own, but when and if I marry, it’s for LIFE. I do not believe in divorce. If Mr. Right doesn’t appear until I’m 80, I still think he is worth waiting for.

Lastly, I think friendship and trust is the key to any good relationship. I don’t have any expectations, nor am I seeking a relationship after the first date, I just want to meet a quality individual to spend time with.

 

[DragonBlood]

wait, you read the profiles?

 

[Calvin]

I'm curious as to whether there are any red flags that people should have seen in this profile or whether your assessment is that she a quality woman.

Does she show LTR potential in the profile? Is she a pump and dump?

Does she demonstrate submissive, feminine and attractive qualities?

What type of person do you think would date her? An alpha or a white-night?

 

[doctorj]

only white knights would bother with this girl, friendship first? HA!

140lbs on a girl also means FAT

 

[floydb25]

Sounds like the stereotypical "successful, independent, strong" woman. Problem is, they're high maintenance, always on the move, and all about themselves. She doesn't demonstrate any feminine, submissive qualities... not sure why you even asked that. Even though she likes to travel and do things - she's probably still boring as ****. All serious, has high standards, hard to please, etc. She doesn't need a man for anything (literally), and people generally like to feel needed / wanted / appreciated.

10-1, she wants to start off as friends first so she can weed out the undesirable people out early - without giving them any wrong "ideas". She's also likely demanding and bossy, and likes to have things her way.

She'll probably never be married... even though that's her obvious indication and desire. But like she said, if Mr. Perfect (not Mr. Right) doesn't ever come along - even when she's 80 - she doesn't care.

For the record, men aren't "intimidated" by women like this. They're simply no fun, don't possess feminine qualities, are too serious and picky, don't need anyone for anything (men generally like to protect / take care of their women), etc.

They're the kind you pump and dump, but not because she's "trash". But unless you're someone like Will Smith from Bad Boys, it's probably not going to happen. She's high class in a different way than looks... more like success and independence.

That's my opinion, anyway.

 

[Purefilth]

wait, you read the profiles?

my thoughts exactly. Its all bullshiit. Photos -Spam cheeky message, next.

 

[zinc4]

1st red flag....she is on an oline dating site...

 

[Vidrio]

Sounds like standard female dating site bullsh!t to me. Nothing out of the ordinary here.

 

[TheStig]

The real question is why do you want us to analyze a profile from 13 years ago?

 

[Calvin]

The real question is why do you want us to analyze a profile from 13 years ago?

I was hoping to see if anyone was able to spot any red flags about her and analyze the type of person that she is. I thought part of it would help to see how other people perceived her and I thought part of it would be fun to compare that perception to how she actually is today.

Unfortunately, this person was "best" friends with my girlfriend and became a very large negative influence on our relationship culminating in her "friend" recently giving her an ultimatum of choosing her friendship or our relationship.

 

[Atom Smasher]

That profile is about as typical as can be. Funny, most of them have this weird idea about "friendship first". When I meet them I always tell them there's no such thing and they always agree.

She has little sense of humility and that is always my biggest red flag. Next.

 

[rhythmic]

For me, red flag here:

Religion: Christian, Active Methodist who attends Church regularly

Stopped reading.

 

[switch]

full analysis

Seeking: Male for Friendship first! *FLAG*
if you believe this BS, kill yourself NOW

Religion: Christian, Active Methodist who attends Church regularly *FLAG* OH! look at me!!!! ,this is the type of cvnt who thinks being religious will actually increase her sexual value,so she uses it as leverage (or likes to think)

Education: Undergraduate degree in Physiology, working on MBA
Occupation: Medical Consultant *FLAG* ok we all know doctors don't put out before AND after marriage , she will most likely become a doc soon
Income: Working hard reaps its rewards *FLAG*
oh! beta-boy! look at me! see ? im a hardworker so you have to be a good working hamster and run in that wheel all your life so i can buy more shoes,bags and other useless stuff

What do I like to do?
Anything but sit still. I’m definitely a mover and a doer. I love the outdoors, theater, traveling overseas, movies, golf, and college football.
*FLAG* < i fuked or like to fuk jocks and rich men(bcuz in my retarded brain,i think golf = rich)

I teach aerobics and kickboxing at the Y and am very active in my church.*FLAG* I I am a proud homeowner, so I am probably one of the few females that can climb a ladder, mow my grass and fix leaks, *FLAG* i am a strong woman! RUN :woo:

I travel all the time for business, so I love to eat out.*FLAG* i'm expensive


I’d also like to say…
I am looking for a CHRISTIAN. so I am not looking for your money, but at the same time, I want to find someone who can contribute to the “cookie jar” equally. *BIG BIG BIG FLAG LIKE THE ONE ON IWO JIMA* I am a proud trader in commodities such as gold, silver and anything else i can trade for my slit...A.K.A gold digger :moon: also im gonna stop working after marriage so i can have more time to get fat! aint that fun fellas!!!

I If Mr. Right doesn’t appear until I’m 80, I still think he is worth waiting for.
*FLAG* i believe that my cvnt is the same color as my hair ---GOLD

nor am I seeking a relationship after the first date, I just want to meet a quality individual to spend time with.*FLAG*
i'm saying this because i dont want you to go caveman on me after i flake on our 2nd date in that fancy expensive Broadway show, even though i realize you spent $500 on our reservations

there.

 

[( . )( . )]

I am looking for a CHRISTIAN. Someone who truly knows what it means to have a relationship with God. That’s not to say I am a “bible banger,”

TRANSLATION:

I'm not a legit believer otherwise I would have secured a Christian husband and children years ago.

I am 27 now and nearing the end of my carousel ride and I'm sick of coming home to just a golden retriever to keep me company so I "found God". Plus I heard "man up and marry the sluts" is big with tradcon church community so I figured it's worth a shot. I combined that with trawling online dating sites with the rest of you losers to increase my chances even more however the thought of you horny beta's makes my skin crawl but I am trying so "friendship first k?"

Your sincerely
Just another statistic who swallowed the lie.Fvck my life.

 

[Atom Smasher]

You guys must remember, this is all female BS, absolutely and positively meaningless once she meets you. Don't they all write delusional crap like this?

If she likes you her "rules" go right out the window and she starts submitting to your rules, if you know how to play.

I've never once met a girl from an online site that wasn't severely flawed or batsh!t crazy. I used to hope for the best but I've accepted that any women who turns to the Interwebs for a mate is extremely mentally and emotionally unbalanced.

 

[rhythmic]

Iwo Jima

Fvcking LOL.

Good analysis dude.

 

[JohnChops]

only white knights would bother with this girl, friendship first? HA!

140lbs on a girl also means FAT

i read 140 lbs and "Athletic" and started to die laughing. I couldnt read anymore lol.

 

[Calvin]

Here are some additional facts regarding this woman. My concern is that this is not a quality woman that my girlfriend should have in her circle of friends.

Attended 3rd tier state university.

Sorority girl and social chair for her sorority.

Began online dating post college b/c there no men were good enough for her.

Pharmaceutical sales rep.

Dyed hair blonde. True hair color is ginger.

Had her breasts augmented in her 30s.

No longer teaches any fitness classes. Continues to gain weight as she ages but her sister is a whale so she thinks that comparatively that she is doing great. Tells my girlfriend that she is too skinny and that she should stop exercising and gain some weight.

Looks are now approximately HB 5-6.

Considers herself to be extremely religious.

She is not funny and does not understand sarcasm.

Has multiple sclerosis so she can't maintain the active always on the go lifestyle.

Type A personality. She wears the pants in the family. Bossy and gets upset and throws temper tantrums if people don't do what she wants.

Married a quiet southern army man in her 30s. Now she complains that he doesn't contribute equally to the cookie jar and wants him to get a real job and make enough money so that she doesn't have to work anymore.

Had twins and spent last 3 months on bed rest. Hired au pair to raise the twins.

Now that she has had kids she is hands off on all of that house and yard work. That's a man's job.

Joined country club but b!tches that her husband is spending her money by playing golf too much. Her solution was to cancel the golf portion of the membership at the Country Club without talking to her husband.

Doesn't enjoy sex with husband and complains to girlfriends that she isn't satisfied. Enjoys sodomizing husband.

Life is too stressful for her so she has to have an annual pass for her weekly massage therapy.

She still enjoys girls nights out with her sister and friends.

She is extremely close to her mother and sister.

She is a southern feminist. She believes in equal rights for women but men are expected to pay and do all of the home projects because that is what southern gentlemen do.

When she invites friends to her house for dinner, she charges them for their "share" of the food and alcohol.

Tries to influence her girlfriends to live their lives just like she lives her own.

Complains that I am controlling because my girlfriend and I stopped socializing with her and her family.

Held an intervention and gave my girlfriend the ultimatum that it was either her friendship or my relationship.

 

[pinkfl]

Honestly the fact that she was in a sorority is a red flag
I made friends in college without having to pay for them

 

[zinc4]

Honestly the fact that she was in a sorority is a red flag
I made friends in college without having to pay for them

That is stupid logic....i joined a fraternity and i wasn't paying for friends...

however, most sorority girls are bimbos to the max....and there are tons and tons of red flags there....in short this girl sounds bitter and worthless and very controlling......yikes...i wouldn't touch her with a 10-foot pole