Just encountered a Cluster B out in the wild. First date went really well. Second date - kind of meh. She's 32 and on the second encounter it became apparent she's a bit of a lush, and our lifestyles just really weren't compatible. Wouldn't have even bothered to call/text her after that except at sundown on our date, I (stupidly) asked her to hold on to my Ray Bans in her purse and at the end of the night forgot to get them back.
So I texted her a few days afterwards, just a generic how's it going message. No reply, so an hour later, I text again "Hey, I think I left my sunglasses in your purse. I was hoping to pick them up this week. (She lives 30 miles away from me). I can come up to your neck of the woods and I'll buy you a beer or a cup of coffee." She texts back immediately, makes a joke about how she sold my glasses to an international arms dealer, we text back and forth and make jokes and friendly banter, and tentatively made plans to meet up for coffee two days later where she'd bring me my glasses. I didn't say anything remotely in the area of "I only want my glasses back, I'm not interested in you." She even sent me a picture text of a "ransom note" from the glasses, saying if I ever want to see them again I'd better buy her a case of Blue Moon. Cute, funny stuff. The witty banter actually had me reconsidering being so dismissive of her after the second date. Girls with a sense of humor are hard to find, so I was actually looking forward to coffee and thinking that maybe I should keep an open mind towards continuing getting to know her.
At bedtime I hadn't heard from her, so I texted her again last night to firm up details about when/where to meet. She texts me back, and then tells me this long story about a kind, elderly man that she met a couple of weeks ago, and about how last night he gave her like a guitar and some very other expensive items as gifts. Then she says "I want to pay him back for his kindness and I'm gathering up used books since he's putting together a library. Do you have any old books you could donate?"
Not wanting to piss her off and mess up my chances of getting back my glasses, I reply "Sure I have some books I could donate. Otherwise they'd just collect dust on my shelves, plus I could only get like $5 for them at Half Price."
She texts back "Nevermind. Sale them to Half Price. If you have a mailing address, I'll ship you the sunglasses. Enjoy your $5 book." At this point I'm like WTF? but I don't want to piss this girl off and antagonize her, so I figure my best strategy at this point to get my glasses was to be beta, so I texted back "I'm really sorry if I said something to upset or offend you. I've enjoyed getting to know you and wish you well" blah blah blah. She replies "No worries. It's the fact that you don't understand that makes it clear."
I really wanted to say "You're right. I really don't understand, nor do I want to understand" but again, I'm trying to retrieve my $150 glasses. I don't get why she felt the need to insult me. How long should I wait before contacting her again if she hasn't mailed them to me?
So I texted her a few days afterwards, just a generic how's it going message. No reply, so an hour later, I text again "Hey, I think I left my sunglasses in your purse. I was hoping to pick them up this week. (She lives 30 miles away from me). I can come up to your neck of the woods and I'll buy you a beer or a cup of coffee." She texts back immediately, makes a joke about how she sold my glasses to an international arms dealer, we text back and forth and make jokes and friendly banter, and tentatively made plans to meet up for coffee two days later where she'd bring me my glasses. I didn't say anything remotely in the area of "I only want my glasses back, I'm not interested in you." She even sent me a picture text of a "ransom note" from the glasses, saying if I ever want to see them again I'd better buy her a case of Blue Moon. Cute, funny stuff. The witty banter actually had me reconsidering being so dismissive of her after the second date. Girls with a sense of humor are hard to find, so I was actually looking forward to coffee and thinking that maybe I should keep an open mind towards continuing getting to know her.
At bedtime I hadn't heard from her, so I texted her again last night to firm up details about when/where to meet. She texts me back, and then tells me this long story about a kind, elderly man that she met a couple of weeks ago, and about how last night he gave her like a guitar and some very other expensive items as gifts. Then she says "I want to pay him back for his kindness and I'm gathering up used books since he's putting together a library. Do you have any old books you could donate?"
Not wanting to piss her off and mess up my chances of getting back my glasses, I reply "Sure I have some books I could donate. Otherwise they'd just collect dust on my shelves, plus I could only get like $5 for them at Half Price."
She texts back "Nevermind. Sale them to Half Price. If you have a mailing address, I'll ship you the sunglasses. Enjoy your $5 book." At this point I'm like WTF? but I don't want to piss this girl off and antagonize her, so I figure my best strategy at this point to get my glasses was to be beta, so I texted back "I'm really sorry if I said something to upset or offend you. I've enjoyed getting to know you and wish you well" blah blah blah. She replies "No worries. It's the fact that you don't understand that makes it clear."
I really wanted to say "You're right. I really don't understand, nor do I want to understand" but again, I'm trying to retrieve my $150 glasses. I don't get why she felt the need to insult me. How long should I wait before contacting her again if she hasn't mailed them to me?