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After a year long dry spell, would you keep waiting to bang a hottie or would you settle with banging a ugly girl?

mrgoodstuff

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If I was drunk I'd do it, but not sober.

Getting notches under your belt does help with confidence with women compared to being out of the game for years. At least for me anyway.
On anyone. Once he's back in pvssy he'll wonder how he got stuck out
 

darksprezzatura

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Besides the obvious boner test, I would say that, at an absolute minimum, it must not feel like a chore.

Think of it this way... If she was coming over your place in a hour, would you be EXCITED about it, or would you feel more like cancelling?

Don’t have to answer. Just food for thought.
Bump
 

B80

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On anyone. Once he's back in pvssy he'll wonder how he got stuck out
yeah I wouldn;t sleep with complete bog trotters, but maybe 5's if smashed in a nightclub.. wouldn;t touch them if sober. even though drunk and them unattractive, would still give me a lift and give you confidence with more attractive women.

bit like a footballer (soccer) who hasn;t scored in ages. even putting away a penalty would give enough boost in confidence to improve your game and more likely to score then from open play.
 

mrgoodstuff

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yeah I wouldn;t sleep with complete bog trotters, but maybe 5's if smashed in a nightclub.. wouldn;t touch them if sober. even though drunk and them unattractive, would still give me a lift and give you confidence with more attractive women.

bit like a footballer (soccer) who hasn;t scored in ages. even putting away a penalty would give enough boost in confidence to improve your game and more likely to score then from open play.
Like that first sniper shot
 

Georgepithyou

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I'm also in a small town, your only real option is to move out and meet more people.

We are very limited with the women we come across in small towns
 

B80

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I'm also in a small town, your only real option is to move out and meet more people.

We are very limited with the women we come across in small towns
Yeah, can imagine that's a bloody nightmare.
 

OldComeBacker

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Tell us so that we can have an example of what NOT to do.
Combination of getting married somewhat early, beta behaviors leading to deadbeadroom marriage, and the shifts in dating (see recent discussion on Greg Adams and huge changes since '90s or even 2010). I never really approached women until my late 30s because I didn't have to, figured since I'm objectively more attractive now in almost all ways that things would be like the '90s for me lol. Had my first rejections at 40, first experiences with women using me for attention/"friendzoning" etc, things i'd only read about happening to OTHER men. Wild stuff.
 

OldComeBacker

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Wow. My record was 5 years. You dryspellmogged me.

For super long dry spells, in most cases, I would say it's probably NOT due to the guy being too picky i.e. turning anyone down.
What was your reason? I'm going to comment more on mine later but for me I had lifelong anxiety and insecurity, got married to avoid being lonely for the most part, never developed dating skills, found myself in the inevitable dead bedroom unhappy beta marriage thing and not knowing how to navigate modern dating (or even the old days, in my case). Basically I just found a combination of those factors put me in a really depressed and low state giving off unattractive vibes and one day turned into the next until it was like 2000 days lol.
 

bat soup

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Combination of getting married somewhat early, beta behaviors leading to deadbeadroom marriage, and the shifts in dating (see recent discussion on Greg Adams and huge changes since '90s or even 2010). I never really approached women until my late 30s because I didn't have to, figured since I'm objectively more attractive now in almost all ways that things would be like the '90s for me lol. Had my first rejections at 40, first experiences with women using me for attention/"friendzoning" etc, things i'd only read about happening to OTHER men. Wild stuff.
My guess then is that you were relatively good looking and didn't had to bother much with game as a younger man. Because women were attracted to you, you didn't experience so much of the BS because they only do that to guys that they're not attracted to.
 

mrgoodstuff

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What was your reason? I'm going to comment more on mine later but for me I had lifelong anxiety and insecurity, got married to avoid being lonely for the most part, never developed dating skills, found myself in the inevitable dead bedroom unhappy beta marriage thing and not knowing how to navigate modern dating (or even the old days, in my case). Basically I just found a combination of those factors put me in a really depressed and low state giving off unattractive vibes and one day turned into the next until it was like 2000 days lol.
2000 days of growth, good living, health, wealth and abundance
 

OldComeBacker

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My guess then is that you were relatively good looking and didn't had to bother much with game as a younger man. Because women were attracted to you, you didn't experience so much of the BS because they only do that to guys that they're not attracted to.
I pretty much had anti-game, I rejected women without realizing it. I had really bad anxiety and lack of socialization from a young age, awkward puberty and got made fun of a lot as a nerdy fat kid. Around 16 or so I got a lot better looking (pretty much stayed the same weight but got a lot taller, more muscular/athletic) but I just assumed I was too weird and ugly. When girls approached me I assumed it was some sort of prank. Eventually, had situations where friends' GFs' friends asked to be set up with me, friends' sister's friends asked me to their prom. That sort of thing. I think my anxiety came off attractive sometimes, as a sort of natural aloofness/non-neediness. Still needy and insecure I usually chose to dismiss signs of attraction and read things in the worst way possible. I would hear from other people stories about how I interacted with some girl and didn't even realize it. Got into serious relationships instead of playing the field, and looked for women/girls who were really into me but I wasn't even that attracted to them. Ended up getting married soon after my all-time best GF dumped me, because I was lonely and wanted kids. Thought she was the safe/logical choice. Got fat and extreme beta husband territory. Did some "married redpill" type stuff and got more attractive but still completely out of it and feeling invisible and ego issues near end of marriage.

If there's a poster child for "it's not your looks but your personality" (and other factors like age and the changing of society) and refutation all the incel/blackpill stuff, it's probably me. I don't think I'm greatlooking, definitely not a male model or anything, but I had "hot" women approach me in my teens and 20s and now in my 40s I at least get "good for your age" from 20somethings.
 

OldComeBacker

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I still can’t put my finger on it. Strike out after strike out. I felt like I lost the “it” factor. Not always hard rejections but lots of friendzoning during that period.
Interesting, isn't it? Did feel like you should've been this close to getting just about any woman you wanted, but instead you were getting none? That's what I felt like, and I think it was 100% a vibe thing - like projecting that defeated (and maybe a little bitter, maybe a little too egocentric) and unconfident presence. It really felt like I was "almost there" to hitting automatic home-runs but I could only get strike-outs, and there was nothing lowering standards or anything else could do for me.
 
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