Advanced eye contact tips

Nicholas Hill

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I have some time left before Uni year three begins so I think I will invest it in you guys once again. I'm going to hopefully write a series of advanced tips - NOT NEWBIE TIPS, like I have been doing for oh so long now.

So, if you're new or still clueless about women, consult the simple tips on e-c.

Its advanced only because its difficult to do, not because of its academic value, and I use an example for my basis.

Its all about...

How to maintain intense eye contact

I remember when I was 16, just about to get past secondary school UK based education, when I was speaking to a teacher of mine. I would glance at him, then speak, but I would speak without even looking at his face. That's how bad it can get.

Soon I learned that eye contact is important, so I then started looking at people's eyes for a second, then looked at their face for the rest of the conversation. I believe this is "normal" behaviour with the average guy.

That wasn't good enough for me. I never felt confident, probably because I still wasn't really looking at my subject.

Then sosuave happened.

I'll not go into my transformation process, but I will simply say that I learned to maintain significant eye contact over the years with girls and women, normally for about 60% of the time. I'm guessing that half of the rAFCs and most of the DJs are at that level. It gets results and it works, and most of you see no reason to boost the eye contact up any further.

Let me share with you an experience I had on Sunday.

I was in a gathering of people and had just come back down from the buzz of being on a brilliant holiday in England. My friend told me that the two people behind me, about my age (but older) had gone to the same place!

They were boyfriend and girlfriend.

I looked at them both, said a ballsy "hi", and got to meet them. This is where it gets special...

I made friends with her boyfriend, and had no ulterior motive for the girl, but I was really interested in getting to know her, so after the meeting I kept the conversation we had before going, and gave the girl the most intense eye contact I think I have ever given girls. She was, after all, very cute.

By "intense", I mean, barely flinching at all. Occasionally looking at her lips, but never trying to look "through" or "behind" her, or to her sides. I would always look at the face, but 90% of the time (as opposed to the average 60% for the average DJ) I would look at her eyes, and to make even more of a point, I chose her left eye and stuck to it. I did not look at her left, then her right, then her left...etc.

I was reading through my very own created boot camp book and came across the fifth article of the first week by surfboard about eye contact and why it is important, then I realised that I had recently done such a ballsy thing and so had the inspiration to write this little article on it.

I felt exactly as surfboard did, as though I was in love with her. I can personally testify to this, but we all know that it doesn't matter what we feel, we should be dependent on what they do. So this is what she did: She would hold my hand for longer when I shook it (which, by the way, when you're shaking girls hands you need to hold the hand horizontally not vertically - its a girl shake) and when she pointed at something for me, she grabbed me and gently led me there! This was after about a total of four minutes of conversation.

Girls are suprising creatures. I can't find many who are not born with the guts to give you so much eye contact when we guys have to work it up. This girl told me her name and helped me to remember it! (I do still know her name but I'm not going to share such personal details about someone else!).

I could say that I walked out of that room afterwards a little "lovesick". And if that happened to me... imagine what effect it had on her.

(It also occured to me that I and she had applied kino and become friends right there and then with her boyfriend right there with her! ...But that's another story!)
 

SamePendo

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SamePendo is maintaining intense eye contact with his monitor, SamePendo is falling in love with his computer!


Yeah! This is sooo true!
Not newbie stuff as you said, could get them into the AFCness in no time.

SamePendo ends his post realizing why all his male friends and family are in love with him. :D
 

BobbDobbs

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When you are listening, you want to maintain pretty constant eye contact. But look away every once in a while so you aren't obviously staring like a mental case.

When you are speaking, you want to look away more often. But then always return to eye contact. When you finish speaking, it is natural to return eye contact to signal that it is the other person's chance to speak.

As for handshaking, Pilinksi suggests a standard man-to-man type handshake with thumb webs touching, but then gently rotate your hand clockwise to bring her hand up on top of yours. Hold for a couple seconds and release, letting her hand slide away.
 

Tiger Eye

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Linguists have studied how children communicate with each other. Put two little girls in a room together and they will typically sit facing each other and speak directly to one another. Put two boys together and they will typically sit side by side facing the same direction, and rarely look at each other when speaking. It seems men have to train themselves to make the kind of eye contact that women do naturally.
 

vdk

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Great post. Occationally we forget some things emphasised in 'the bible' - eye contact!!! I tried intense eye contact a few times on gals and with it you build this sort of 'connection' with her. To her, the connection will mean and feel more to her since most guys have lousy EC. 2 weeks ago I heavy EC'd a HB during a discuss in my uni class and afterwards she started kino'in me. Went for the number close and without any 'umms' or 'errs' she quickly gave me her number.
 

Ar7

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I have read somewhere possibly on this board or elsewhere that direct eye contact produces some sort of a chemical in your body, giving you that butterfly feeling of being in love. True or not it has definately worked for me so far.
 

BobbDobbs

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Originally posted by Othello
I see this female handshake being posted here alot and even with BobbDobbs description I still can't picture it. Can any of you post a link to a picture fo describe in graphic detail??? =P
It's not that difficult. Imagine shaking someone's hand, standard handshake. Your right hand to their right hand.

Now that you have their hand in your hand, you can turn it like a doorknob. If you turn it a quarter turn one way, their hand would be below yours. If you turn it a quarter turn the other way, their hand ends up above yours.

Practice this: Stick your right hand out like you are going to shake someone's hand, but just grab a doorknob instead. Now turn the knob clockwise. That's it.
 

becker

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Even simpler. Your palm up, her palm down, on top of yours.
 

SamePendo

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bump
 

Starman

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I just tried this handsshake palm thing with my c0ck..I stuck my palm out and grabbed my c0ck and got wood! SO I know the shyat works to turn women on too!

Im still amazed women maintain the best eye contact in conversation..but when you pass them up in the street..they break contact right away!

I guess there has to be some level of association or rapport..before she feels it "safe" to maintain eye contact

What about facial expressions and different types of eye contact (i.e. the long interested stare, the inqusitive "huh?", the eyeball looking up stare aka bedroom eyes) anyone ever try variations of eye contact?
 

Eternal

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Superb Tip Nich.

crazykid: a dream maker and stealer of Von Neuen sayings!
 

Beige

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There is an HB9 in my class. She maintains >70% eye contact with everyone. So beware, just as with kino and touchy-feely girls there are the "looky" ;) ones who will maintain strong EC with everyone.
 

dip

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Nice Find Man!

I was on the verge of figuring this one out myself recently. I would concentrate on one eye more then the other, it gives some kind of effect on the girl and myself! But yeah, do what he said, look at her face too, dont just stare at her!
 
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