A woman needs a MANNNN opinion

frustrada

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JackPrescott said:
If she is a typical woman, she will take the dcik.
If I were Typical woman, I wouldnt be writing here right now, I would be ****ing with the **** and not asking you for advice
 

frustrada

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Ken785 said:
yeeahhh...looks like were going to have to see a pic to prove that..
You would die if you see my pic,and then tell me to left him right away
 
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Microphone Fiend said:
This is what you guys do not understand about women. The man is not treating her good, because if he was treating her good, she would be happy. You are looking at being happy from your perspective when deciding what should be done to make her happy. You cannot be so egocentric in seduction/relationships.

She doesn't get treated how she wants to be treated, she does not feel how she wants to feel. Is she supposed to suck it up and endure a crappy relationship because he put food on the table and keeps her in good clothes? Like Western Philosophies, you guys overemphasize the rational and overlook the emotional and misconstrue the human experience.
She should have known this before she got married!!!!! Get over it - men are not here to cater to a woman's emotions!! This is not our job!!! She is the nurturer and not us! He is a typical man in this regard!
 

Interceptor

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Actually, LMS is right.

I understand about symplathy for her situation.
But there's a difference between sympathy and avoiding responsibility.


Frustrada, it's your 'mistake'.

I am not going to 'excuse' you for it, neither will your husband.Nor will any intelligent and 'clued in' Man.
And the immature, less experienced guys that do , have a lot to learn about women's behavior and true traits.



Frustrada, you "made your bed, now lie in it."
There at least some REAL Men who don't buy into the femenine 'perogative' bullsh*t.
When men make mistakes, you can see how they are pounced on for being 'immature or selfish, or irresponsible", but when women do the same thing you get 'you go girl! leave him!".

This "I'll learn to love him" has been used for ages, and IT NEVER WORKS OUT.
Now you see the error of your ways, and you just want to cut and run.




If you truly don't care for this man, then decide how you are going to go about leaving him.
If you do care for him, then try to work things out, and try to correct the mistakes you made.

From what I can tell, you are just confused.
You don't seem to love him. You don't seem to have affection for him.

But you don't want to feel guilty about this.
And you are also scared of being alone and without security.
You don't want to feel like you're a bad person.
But living in denial is immature and foolish.

Don't be immature and foolish.

Decide if you love him and have enough affection, and RESPECT to try to work things out.
If so, then DO.

If not, you have your Pre Nup and file for divorce and move out.
Becaue if you DO not TAKE ACTION, you will build up more misery , negative energy, bitterness, and resentment and it will become a vicous cycle which will embitter the both of you.

You have to get off the 'fence' about this.

And learn to be stronger inside, and not expect OTHERS to be RESPONSIBLE for YOUR OWN HAPPINESS.
That was your mistake.
And you knew this from the beginning.
You took a chance and gambled and it seems like you lost.
If you DO not learn from this, then you WILL be DOOMED to repeat these mistakes over and over, and your looks will not be able to save you, nor your career.

No one likes bitter, angry , cynical, damaged goods as their romantic love partner.


So now, the mature thing to do is TAKE ACTION.

Either FIX this, or Minmize the damage and LEAVE.
 

synergy1

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Microphone Fiend said:
She doesn't get treated how she wants to be treated, she does not feel how she wants to feel. Is she supposed to suck it up and endure a crappy relationship because he put food on the table and keeps her in good clothes? Like Western Philosophies, you guys overemphasize the rational and overlook the emotional and misconstrue the human experience.
This is another classic case of people not taking responsibility for themselves, and instead doing finger pointing so as to deflect the problem. Pro tip: if she isn't getting treated well in her own mind, she should be mature enough to cut it off BEFORE MARRIAGE. Accountability is a two way street, and for all the "equality" women want, they sure as $hit don't want accountability when a situation akin to this happens to come up ; its always the mans fault for not being a mind reader and catering to her emotions.

What a crock of crap.
 

Interceptor

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synergy1 said:
This is another classic case of people not taking responsibility for themselves, and instead doing finger pointing so as to deflect the problem. Pro tip: if she isn't getting treated well in her own mind, she should be mature enough to cut it off BEFORE MARRIAGE. Accountability is a two way street, and for all the "equality" women want, they sure as $hit don't want accountability when a situation akin to this happens to come up ; its always the mans fault for not being a mind reader and catering to her emotions.

What a crock of crap.
The truth can sometimes hurt.
But synergy is right, Frustrada.

Now be the best person you can muster up, build your courage, Woman. And be strong for you and him.
Do the right thing.
DO not wallow in misery and go ove rthe same ol' ground here.

Take action.

Do the right thing.

If you need help , we'll help.
If you want to work things out with him, then maybe you can refer him to this site.


It is obvious that he is not in a good emotioanl place right now.


He needs help too.
 

LovelyLady

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Please clarify a few things Frustrada.

What are your respective ages?

Did both you and he live at your Father's house until a few months ago... and now you are living in a home or apartment provided by your husband instead?

Did you obtain a different citizenship by marrying him?

While you were in school, who paid your bills?

What made you love him in the beginning (you said you loved him, but I really wonder at that as you also seem to say how "everyone else" in your family/friends said you should love him).

Honesty is key here - did you ever really truly love this man? Did he shake you down to the roots of your soul? Or did you just think "he'll do - good enough, I guess" and now you realize you want more afterall.

And I want you to tell me what would he say about you and where you have fallen short of your part in your relationship?

You focus so much on the outer trappings of life - which are important - financial contributions, workloads, being able to play and have/do fun things together - but I really wonder at if you ever truly loved this man.

People have roles that they are comfortable filling (provider, nurturer, sex bunny, Mom/Dad, handyman/honey-do guy, etc.), and they can be flexible or more rigid as situations dictate and personalities feel comfortable, but without the foundation of a real, genuine, deep, passionate heart and soul love and respect there is nothing to sustain you during periods of difficulty like you are facing.

Hence my wanting you to search your heart for the truth and possible memory of LOVE.

To leave a marriage and break your vows is no small thing.
 

Interceptor

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To leave a marriage and break your vows is no small thing
Very true, LL
And people are so flippant about marriage.

You know, it's funny.
But it seems so hard for so many people to be involved and give their 'heart' to someone in a simple BF/GF relationship, but so many people are so carefree, less discerning and throw caution to the wind when it comes to Marriage.
I don't understand this phenomena at all.

People are downright terrified of falling in love and being intimate and vulnerable, but when it comes to Marriage they look at it as something they can drop like a new shirt that doesn't flatter their figure or something....
 
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remotecontrol said:
I hate to say it but this is why I dont want to settle down with a woman.

Women are predictable

If a woman knows she looks better than adverage she will expect to be "treated well" all the time

If a woman knows she looks below adverage, she will be desperate to hold onto any guy and put up with any BS.

Men want hot women but hot women crave excietement because they believe they deserve it, below adverage looking women dont believe this.

If you get a hot woman, good luck holding on to her.

Most guys settle for below adverage looking women because we all know that these women are easy to live with and they wont expect much from a man.

Hot women will fvck a lot of men because this is what hot women believe is excieting. Especially if they have a sucker willing to bank roll them.

PATHETIC.


And this is why Im a DJ. I dont wont to do it but I dont want to settle for a below adverage life and I wont allow myself to wind up making a fool of myself by commiting to a hot B1TCH.

Sorry but this is how it is.
Remotecontrol - You said it like it is!! :up:

Good points Interceptor!!
 

Colossus

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synergy1 said:
This is another classic case of people not taking responsibility for themselves, and instead doing finger pointing so as to deflect the problem. Pro tip: if she isn't getting treated well in her own mind, she should be mature enough to cut it off BEFORE MARRIAGE. Accountability is a two way street, and for all the "equality" women want, they sure as $hit don't want accountability when a situation akin to this happens to come up ; its always the mans fault for not being a mind reader and catering to her emotions.

What a crock of crap.
Truer words were never spoken.

Good points also, remotecontrol. I will not date overtly hot women for just the reasons you listed. They are always entitled to something, never satisfied. That is a hard fact of life that many men never reconcile within themselves.
 

MacAvoy

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I'm going to side with Sinister, LMS and Interceptor that she needs to take responsibility for her actions.

She's exhibiting classic wh0re branch swinging behaviour. This guy never went from DJ to AFC. He was always an AFC and now she wants to leave? Its not like he's changed his ways in the past 2 years to make her stop attracting her. She said he's always been this way.
 

Ken785

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frustrada said:
You would die if you see my pic,and then tell me to left him right away
id die? really? so, by saying i would "die", does that mean because youre not attractive? or are you too attractive?? lets see! post one up!
 

Infamous J

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frustrada said:
If I were Typical woman, I wouldnt be writing here right now, I would be ****ing with the **** and not asking you for advice
You're right, you're not a typical woman. You're a typical girl, here talking sh*t about your husband and trying to rationalize leaving him to us. You're basing all your happiness on him and shifting the blame to someone else for your dissatisfaction with a relationship you willfully walked into. I'm guessing you'll probably leave him, once you're through justifying it in your mind.

You're a trick, and I feel sorry for the next sucker that crosses your path.
 

LovelyLady

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iqqi said:
I love your sig, LovelyLady. How true! The same can be said for women.
Yes, Iqqi. .. and I am a big fan of Pooh Bear. :) My favorite is:


Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered.

"Yes, Piglet?"

"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."”
 
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