A Thanks To Those Who Tried..

[The Damned]

Cheers for the advice guys every bit of advice you have given me is good advice.
But I dont think life will ever work for me(not that your advice is wrong) im destined to fail at every opportunity, Ive tried everything to get people to even acknowledge me, but Im ignored at every opportunity and looked at like im a piece of ****.
How is a guy expected to change when his life has been over 8 1/2 years of hell? Why would it change?
Every year around this time since about 2001 Ive kidded myself up with the fact that maybe next year will be my year and that I will get what I deserve in life but every year life lets me down, lets me down, lets my family down and keeps me as a nobody to the outside world.
Maybe im getting used to this pointless, useless existance now and trying to come to terms with why I was made to live in this world and why I have been kept alive for so long.

 

[aliasguy]

Cheers for the advice guys every bit of advice you have given me is good advice.
But I dont think life will ever work for me(not that your advice is wrong) im destined to fail at every opportunity, Ive tried everything to get people to even acknowledge me, but Im ignored at every opportunity and looked at like im a piece of ****.
How is a guy expected to change when his life has been over 8 1/2 years of hell? Why would it change?
Every year around this time since about 2001 Ive kidded myself up with the fact that maybe next year will be my year and that I will get what I deserve in life but every year life lets me down, lets me down, lets my family down and keeps me as a nobody to the outside world.
Maybe im getting used to this pointless, useless existance now and trying to come to terms with why I was made to live in this world and why I have been kept alive for so long.

THIS guy is why, although I disagree with him often, Joekerr is good for this place.

Hey, The Damned, go read some Joekerr posts.

How things go from here is up to YOU.

Snap out of it, dude. Be a man. Butch up. Stop crying. See a counselor if you need to. Whatever. The world will let you drown. The world doesn't CARE what you THINK you deserve. You have to go get it. YOU have to pull yourself up.

 

[EFFORT]

Whats your deal man, whats going wrong, be specific don't say (everything, even if it is explain in detail what that consist of)

 

[Obsidian]

how old are you? you probably have plenty of time to fix things

 

[The Damned]

Whats your deal man, whats going wrong, be specific don't say (everything, even if it is explain in detail what that consist of)

Everything in life has always went wrong. As a kid I barely survived my own pet attacking me leaving me with terrible injuries and psychological problems that took me years to recover from, In school, I was laughed at and stabbed in the back by people, In college(although I was liked and people thought I was a nice guy) the odd person still stabbed me in the back.
Ive had rumours spread about me in my social life that I was gay, a wrongful rumour that still continues to this day.
Ive had a small minority of my own family that have stabbed me in the back, I was cheated out of my driving licence and left in a heap of debt trying to pay off what I had worked to try and gain and ended up with nothing after 3 years of solid effort. People have laughed behind my back and spreaded vicious rumours.
My life has been hell, although there has been the odd up, its mostly consisted of downs, its been pointless even living it so far.

 

[The Damned]

how old are you? you probably have plenty of time to fix things

24 mate, hardly young am I? The Best Years in my life have passed now

 

[jdawgmcb]

Sounds like you might be depressed, you should go see a counselor about it.

I was depressed and meds have REALLY helped me get through it.

 

[The Damned]

Sounds like you might be depressed, you should go see a counselor about it.

I was depressed and meds have REALLY helped me get through it.

Been down that road dude, meds made my physically unfit and almost obese and like a zombie physically.
Counselling my counsellor was a sound fella and we talked, he gave me coping methods and ways to look at my life but thats the maximum they can do.

 

[Interceptor]

Damned, you are giving in again to defeatist attitude and accepting a 'failure" mindset.
Many males have had hardship and struggles. And many of us have not had the best support through the toughest of times. But we got through it, and we're still here.

I've had my heart broken many times, and have had other difficulties as well.
I have expereinced sadness and grief, feelings of failure and giving up too.
Financial difficulties, relationship difficulti8es, adn problems with my relatives.

I could go on and on....


BUT.......

I am still here.
I am stronger than ever.
I am "PRESENT".

And I am not beaten.

And if I am called to 'war', off to 'war" I go.
Do you understand what that means?

I am talking on a deep, primal level here, Brother.

Only Men know what it is MEN experience.
A masculine man must possess thse four traits:

LOVER
HUNTER
WARRIOR
PROVIDER


I will not let down my fellow brother.
I am not a coward.
And I do not look at life as a "victim".

I take ownership for MY Life.

I do not sit back and watch Life "do things to me".

Life doesn't "DO" ANYTHING to YOU.

You are the one who makes Life.

Life IS what YOU make IT.


Re read those four traits, and research them.
It's your duty, your MISSION in Life to REALIZE those things in yourSELF.

It is your SOLEMN Duty to yourSELF.

You are doing an injustice, a downright OFFENSE if not to others who care about you (if none do, that is still OK We will not cry, brother. Iti s OK to have grief and sadness, but it is not OK as Warrior to be consuumed by uit. You will not be a reliable Warrior. We won't be able to count on you when things get REALLY BAD. Understand?) TO YOURSELF if you 'give up' and "resign yourself to failure."


LIFE is a FORCED MARCH.

LIFE IS A FORCED MARCH.

You can quit 100 times as long as your feet keep moving.

LIFE IS A FORCED MARCH.

YOU STOP..............

...........you DIE.

You then become worthless to yourself, to your family, and to your fellow brothers.

We feel grief, but mostly we feel disappointment when we lose our fellow brothers to this.

Think about what I am saying on your most primal masculine, deepest level of your mind.

Those areas of your psyche which you have neglected and disconnected yourself from.

You are there still.

In your most deepest self.

You are still there.

But you have to find your way to connect to it again.

If you give uep now, what's left for you to do?
I mean, what kind of life do you have now?
What do you have to look forward to?
You gave up on your goals, dreams, ambitions, desires, experiences, the women, your family, your career...........EVERYTHING.

YOU gave it all away.


This is what you truly want?

 

[Stéphane]

Pathetic, so your really just going to give up are you? Your going to let the world crush you, and your going to let the people who treatred you like crap win this? HOW PATHETIC IS THAT! Your just going to rollover, and die like a dog?

USE YOUR PAIN AND FIGHT BACK. Fight until you die, even if you fail, atleast you know you gave it your best, and people will admire you for that. When people admire you they also earn your respect.

 

[COD]

OH POOR BABY.....YOU GOT a computer to communicate with, a nice warm house, and a slew of other stuff.


its the journey to attain a goal thats is supposed to be fun. REALITY check....U migh never reach your goal, you may never get what you want. But at least your tried, made an attempt..............life sux then you die........its what you do in between those two points that counts.

You are no different than anyone else............its all about how serious you take things. Stop and take a look around dude, smell the flowers and head to work/school and do it all over again. Thats life.............it aint supposed to be easy all the time nor are you supposed to be handed all the answers all at once.

Live,love, and reflect.............if u are not happy..........MAKE A CHANGE...but stop looking for all the answers. Sometimes you can do EVERYTHING RIGHT and still be wrong. I hate to tell u this but it does not get any easier as you get older..........in fact it gets tougher.

So what do u have to look forward to............what ever your heart desires but take pride in the little things, cause theres a ton of people that have a heck of a lot less.

 

[ChrizZ]

Cheers for the advice guys every bit of advice you have given me is good advice.
But I dont think life will ever work for me(not that your advice is wrong) im destined to fail at every opportunity, Ive tried everything to get people to even acknowledge me, but Im ignored at every opportunity and looked at like im a piece of ****.
How is a guy expected to change when his life has been over 8 1/2 years of hell? Why would it change?
Every year around this time since about 2001 Ive kidded myself up with the fact that maybe next year will be my year and that I will get what I deserve in life but every year life lets me down, lets me down, lets my family down and keeps me as a nobody to the outside world.
Maybe im getting used to this pointless, useless existance now and trying to come to terms with why I was made to live in this world and why I have been kept alive for so long.

YOU CAN'T HELP YOURSELF BECAUSE YOURSELF SUCKS!!!

GET MAD YOU SON OF A B!TCH, GET MAD!!!

BECOMING A WINNER. THAT IS THE ONLY THING THAT COUNTS IN THIS WORLD!!!

NOW GET OUT THERE IN THE REAL WORLD AND BECOME A WINNER YOU FAGGOT!!!

 

[Interceptor]

OK, I see some of you guys really trying.

You know, that's fvcking honorable, and admirable, and I'm proud to see the nobleness in you, young brothers.

It is noble.


I can see your bravery in the face of fear, and adversity.

You know the challenges, and you've owned them and your issues. You've stuck in there.
You are disappointed when you see your fellow brother sinking.....drowning.......in his sea of Self Pity.

We know better.
But he does not.


Here's something that I continually repeat, because I continue to see this recurring theme:

"What do I do???!! How do I know??? How do I do this? What does it mean?"


It's this sinking desperation.

It's not knowing what it is to be a Man.

Men are not BEING "The Rock."

Instead, you are like the waves, the peaks and vallies.
Instead of being solid, and GROUNDED...you are fluttery....a little bit here..a little bit there........

That is NOT the mark of a Man.

A Man must have defninte chief Purpose. He must have his DIRECTION.
He must FEEL HIMSELF Grounded to the Earth and his purpose.
There must be CONNECTION.
When you see these guys all fluttery like, buzzing about "OMG! what do I do? What do I say? How should I be?"

It all comes from being disconnected to your Sexuality, Masculinity,Desire, Inner Drive and recognizing the basic primal traits of not only yourself, but of WOMAN.

Women can ONLY RESPOND to YOU..and give themselves freely..and uninhibitedly..if you are HER MASCULINE COUNTERPART.

Only way.
Only one way.

Reconnect to the Masculine SELF.

Find "him", your true Masculine Self, and you will find Salvation.

Women seek out desperately their Masculine counterpart to fulfill them. To complete them. To realize their Femeninity and Womanhood in all their femenine Glory.

When a woman first meets you , she often visualizes you sexually.

HOW do YOU present YourSELF to Womne?

Knowing NOW that women want to visualize what you are like 'in bed", how will you now project yourself to women?

Can you see just how important it is to present yourself as a cool, confidenct , mature, and masculine Man who is in touch with his Sexuality, and his feelings, and OWNS them???
They notice your body, your body language, how you project yourself, your voice, your tone of voice, everything. And they want to FEEL you. Your REAL Masculine SELF. THAT'S who they want know.

The strong, confident, tough as nails, masculine Alpha Male who is in touch wiht his feelings, and sexuality. Who does NOT HIDE from anyone or anything.
He does not HIDE.
He CANNOT HIDE.

HE WILL NOT HIDE!!

She can often sense in deep primal centers if you are giving, or are selfish in bed. If youare in contact with your deep, primal Animal masculine Self, or not. She can tell in seconds ify ou will neve rbe more than just a friend to her, or if you can or cannot keep her Interest.

Women sense it.
they FEEL you. Inside.
The only 'little boy" they want to know beter is the one the gave birth to. The only 'mommy' they want to be is to their actual children.

Not you. You're an Adult.
Why are you acting like a BOY?

Why Are you NOT BEING ,FEELING,and ACTING Like a MAN????!!!!


Women want a man with rock solid emotional strength.
A man who can say "NO" to a woman.
A man who challenges his woman.
A man who is confident and RECOGNIZE his true WORTH.
She longs for a Man who is in contact with his Romantic "lover" personality and his aggressivre, passionate "Animal" side.

If you have BOTH these traits, you are GOLD. And women want YOU!

The answer is, and always HAS been;

BE THE "MAN".


BE THE MAN.

 

[KontrollerX]

I don't know if you're a professional wrestling fan but Bret Hart has always been a hero to me.

He's a huge star in the wrestling business, retired now but a huge star still nonetheless.

He didn't become a success overnight in the business, he had to work really hard, scratch and claw his way to the top to make a name for himself and when he was ontop of the world it was great he had a good long run and was made five time WWE champion.

Even though the outcome of wrestling is scripted they tend to only give the world championship to guys that have worked hard enough and proven that they are the best entertainer and performer in the company at the time, the champion also makes the most money in the company aside from the boss.

In 14 years working for the WWE Bret Hart only missed two shows thats how dedicated he was to his company and his craft.

Ontop of the world like this you'd think he'd never fall or a least have a graceful and honorable retirement right?

No.

Instead he was betrayed by the same company he worked so hard for all those years (you can read all about it by looking up "Montreal Screwjob" on Wikipedia) and after doing this horrible thing to him that same company came up with an irresponsible stunt for his brother Owen to do who was another professional wrestler. The stunt was that he would come down from the rafters as part of a super hero gimmick they were running with him at the time but the harness broke costing his brother his life.

Did Bret Hart give into his anger and retreat from life disgusted with it all after these two horrible things happened to him, did he quit striving in life?

No.

He continued to wrestle for the competing promotion at the time WCW and was given the time onscreen to say a few words about Owen and his tragic death.

If memory serves correctly it was a day or a week after his brother's horrible and unexpected death that Bret came out in front of millions of fans and in so doing showed his bravery and courage as he talked about his life and Owen's despite the pain, anger and confusion he must of been feeling at the time.

The video of this moment can be seen by clicking the youtube link below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPPGSFMXELo

Tragedy didn't end for Bret Hart there.

Sometime later he suffered a career ending injury when Bill Goldberg kicked him in the side of the head during a match and was so inexperienced it was a real kick and not a proper wrestling kick that is supposed to look good but not actually hurt the other wrestler. The kick gave Bret another in a long list of concussions during his career and messed up something in his neck that could not be corrected with surgery.

After this he retired from wrestling and tried to make the best of his life and it was going good, but one day while riding his bike he hit a pothole and flew over the handlebars and landed on his head and after having so many previous concussions he suffered a stroke which doctors say they don't know for sure if anyone will ever be able to recover from. Strokes are a play as you go type of condition. They gave Bret six months as a timeframe to recover if he ever would. The left side of his body was paralyzed.

Lying there did he give into bitterness and give up on life?

Hell no.

He fought to recover from that and after many painful months of rehab he did.

After this he got a divorce and married a new woman who he recently divorced and his good friend who was like a brother Chris Benoit committed that double murder suicide and this guy had been trained by Bret's father.

And yet still none of this awful horrible stuff none of it ever made the Hitman give up and quit striving in life.

He is still moving forward and getting ready to make a new DVD on his career with WWE.

Whenever I am down in life I always think of how my hero Bret "The Hitman" Hart always overcomes adversity sooner or later because he never stops trying.

Now its true that not everyone in life even if they try and try again overcomes adversity but dammit I don't know about you but I'd rather go down fighting than to just give up entirely.

Anyway sorry for the long winded post and to let you know Interceptor's post was excellent as was aliasguy's recommendation that you should check out joekerr's threads.

Before I go here is a few more links...

1. Bret Hart speaking in an Australian wrestling promotion after recovering from his stroke to be well enough to do so.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NYqsCRMehs

2. A very inspiring post by a poster named Cutler whose life was literally saved and turned around by things that the great legendary Sosuave poster Pook wrote.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=54270

3. And if you're a fan of Rise Against's music this song is one of my favorites, its called Survive and its lyrics have really helped me when I've been down because they are so true and I think they apply to you right now as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19X7rttooH0

 

[reset]

Great post Interceptor, I always feel invigorated after reading one of your posts.

As we continue to remove what is NOT us, we more clearly discover the great men we all have potential to be.

 

[Crazy Asian]

Cheers for the advice guys every bit of advice you have given me is good advice.
But I dont think life will ever work for me(not that your advice is wrong) im destined to fail at every opportunity, Ive tried everything to get people to even acknowledge me, but Im ignored at every opportunity and looked at like im a piece of ****.
How is a guy expected to change when his life has been over 8 1/2 years of hell? Why would it change?
Every year around this time since about 2001 Ive kidded myself up with the fact that maybe next year will be my year and that I will get what I deserve in life but every year life lets me down, lets me down, lets my family down and keeps me as a nobody to the outside world.
Maybe im getting used to this pointless, useless existance now and trying to come to terms with why I was made to live in this world and why I have been kept alive for so long.

man, just suck it up.
there's no other way.
nobody can make you miserable but youself.

I used to think that i was miserable cause i didn't have many friends and wasn't popular.
Now I don't give a fvck about anybody that doesn't want to be my friend.
Seriously, find a passion in your life. Sometime you can invest in and that you enjoy.

Go to the gym and push yourself.
Look good (good clothing and stuff), cause people judge initially by looks.

Just stop sitting around expecting it to happen, and actually go out there and MAKE it happen. Don't worry about your life not changing instantly. It will come with a lot of effort, but at the same time, before you even know it.

Just start improving yourself, and you'll find out that you don't need acknowledgment from anybody.

 

[DrD77]

don't throw in the towel man

 

[Epic]

Look man you can't just give up like that. Growing up I've been assaulted, I've gotten death threats, and all because I'm part Native American. I've been called every racial slur in the book. I've lost faith in my religion. I've gone through drug addiction. I've faced death and disfigurement too, I know what it can do to you, I had to be put on anti-depressants to deal with it. I spent some time in a psych ward because of my accident, but also because the withdrawal from anti-depressants made me feel like I was losing my mind. On top of that I had to file bankruptcy because I had been drinking before the accident so my insurance wouldn't cover the medical bills, and I'm only 22 years old.

That's life buddy, take a look around. Bullsh!t is raining down on everyone, not just you; quit standing out in it and get an umbrella. If you think you're a loser, you're always going to be one. All the crap that's happened to you is in the past, you can't change it. You CAN change your future though. Choose to be a winner. That's what I did and guess what?

If some one hits me now, I knock them on their a$$. If someone calls me a racial slur, I just laugh and walk away, I don't care. I've regained my faith and I'm completely sober. I learned from my near death experience, plus it's a story I can tell that actually means something. I use the disfigurement as a reminder of where the loser mentality got me. I'm mentally and emotionally stable, I have a great girlfriend, and I'm working on building my credit back up as much as I can. I'm more strong, persistant, and wise than I've ever been. I WIN because I've told myself the minute I decided I was going to change everything around that I was a WINNER. I'm too focused on staying motivated and ACTING to even have time for regret and negativity. It's your choice man, what are you going to be.

A WINNER OR A LOSER?

Everybody else here sees a winner, you just haven't realized it yet, so get up, brush the dirt off of your a$$, and get back in the game. You're going to fail until you've got the right mindset, once you've got the right mindset you can never fail. Good luck to you my friend.

 

[ChrizZ]

I already posted this in another thread, but I thought this might also inspire you:

Here is my life story in a nutshell. Growing up I was being beat up by my dad, humiliated in every way possible and he even beat me into hospital once. My mother was an alcoholic and almost died when I was 16 because of that. Needless to say I didn't develop any confidence so kids tried to walk all over me and I didn't have any real friends, let alone girls. I got into a vicious circle and everything got worse. My life was one big pile of dog s--t. However I never ever backed down. Having said that one day I hit rock bottom. I got into an accident. There was a 90% that I would be a paraplegic after that, but I wasn't. I stayed in hospital for a few months. I was insanely lucky. Then I read a bunch of self help books on the internet. I tried to put into practice what I read, but everything got worse. From that day I stopped reading and decided to take massive action. I let go of my ego and tried to figure out things on my own. I created my own rules and principles which I started to live by. I didn't make any friends during that time or got girls because my reputation was already at the bottom of the barrel. However I became a completely new person. After a while I moved away and went to a new school where I became the ultimate top dog. During that time I found myself. I became a master at dealing with people and making friends. I found my passion in life. Helping people to save them from their pathetic little lives. People like you. I'm on a good way of becoming a motivational speaker and primarily an image/fashion consultant. I'm not talking down on you here because I have been in the exact same situation like you. Currently I'm working on that part of my life and I'm seeing success already.

So what can we learn from this?

If you go through hell... keep going!

There are two kinds of people out there:

People that run sh!t and people that eat sh!t. What's it gonna be "The Damned"?

 

[steve12b]

Believe me, if you go to see a doctor they will give you anti-depressants. The happyness you'll experience comes from drugs and you probably wont want to rely on it forever, but it'll give you self confidence to make changes that you probably know need to be done but have just been afraid to do.

Confidence is a chemical thing, the lack of it just means you're brain has too much stress chemicals and not enough "happy" chemicals. Simple as that. Logically you are in a sinking ship, but there are plenty of people who have much more daunting problems than a lack of sex or sucess in life, and they do wind up turning things around.

Being stabbed in the back and made fun of...i know it's cliche but people really are jealous of you. They're not jealous of you as a whole because its clear to them that you're not happy, but they're jealous of your ability to let things roll off your back...or so they think. They see someone who keeps on trucking year after miserable year when they know that if things went wrong for them they'd commit suicide after a few months. My life was like that, I had no close friends for such a long time that I lost the ability to relate to people properly. I now have a beautiful gf who understands this and is helping "rehabilitate" me, although I was on the right path before I met her. I've admitted so many things to her that I never thought I could tell anyone, and I imagine that seeing a counseler would have had a similar effect on me.

So...you've gotta make drastic changes. Take a leap of faith and do something you know will help you. You're a logical being, so apply the logic of "stay here and be unhappy vs do something and maybe become happy" and make the logical choice. It will be the smartest thing you've ever done and you will likely remember some pivotal moment for the rest of your life.