You know what makes me sick? The replies to this post.
Jester - This was a very cynical post. It was true. Thanks forhaving the balls to write it. HOWEVER - you definatly could have spared me the pook reference. The man is the king of armchair seducers, he SEDUCES THE FORUM with his use of language via posts, thats pretty sad.
Someone said something about "if you want to be smart, study. If you want to be a good athlete, work out. You can do anything you put your mind to" - this is not true. Not at all. I am the 5th best soccer goalkeeper in NYS. I am in the top 50 in the country. this is as good as I can be. Sure, if I KEPT PLAYING longer than the other guys, half of them would quit... but Id still be floating around the top 20-30. I was not born with the tools to be the best soccer player in the country. I was not born to go pro. I worked on soccer 15-20 hours a week for 5 years to get this good, this is the high road. You have to apply logic to this. If you were boring all your life, even around your best friends who you are very comfortable with, you WILL NOT be a stand up commedian, getting girls to laugh untill they cant breath. If you got a 1000 SAT you CANNOT get a 4.0 at Harvard (anyone please TRY and debate this with me). The truth is, we are all born with potential - we have to work our asses off to achieve it. And when we do, that sense of accomplishment will be wonderfully fulfilling and give us the confidence we need to attract others with similar potential/achievement.
PRL - you are naive and foolish. You did not read jesters post as it was written from the start, you developed false notions about the text, you developed opinions based on those false notions, you began preaching them. I want you to read what I am about to say very closely.
First of all, love is physical. Without your brain and its release of chemicals there would be no love. Rocks do not love eachother. I love my family, I am devoted to them, they are devoted to me. I love a slect few of my friends. THAT IS LOVE. There is no other kind of love. The love you have for an attractive woman is the same you have for your grandfather: it is a sense of responsibility. You love your children as you love your brother: again, you have responsibility to them. Your BODY TELLS YOU, through a release of chemicals, that you have this responsibility. The "love at first sight" feeling is a very basic form of attraction. Its a different set of chemicals.
You can enduce BOTH those feelings in OTHERS and YOURSELF through ACTION (with the proper understanding of you and your target). Love is as anger... a very fundemental emotion - there is nothing "special" about it - it is just a very fulfilling, wonderful, and basic emotion.
Women are all the same. Men are all the same. In fact, I would go as far to say that people are all the same. That is - they act in similar ways in similar enviornments if they have similar past experiences and similar inate disposistions. Re read that.
Ok, the truth is, If you completely understand three men, you can understand every man you will ever meet, and know a great deal about women. If you completely understand three women, you can undrestand every woman you will ever meet, and know a great deal about men. What three men and what three women?
1st person. 2nd person. 3rd person.
Understand yourself. Understand a member of your audience. Understand someone outside yoursphere of influence. In that oarder. First, you realize that you are human, and you have control over a select few of your body's processes. Begin to use them to achieve goals. Then see how those goals impact another man's life. Then look at your indirect contribution to the world. Then use that knowledge to refine your understanding of self, and begin the process again. In time, you will have a great deal of control over yourself, you will understand and actively influence the control others have over themselves, and you will see your clear contribution (in comparison) to men everywhere.
BUT WAIT! If we apply this same reasoning to women, the first, and most important part of this cycle is missing! You are not a woman, so what do you do?
You make assumptions. You assume that women are people, so on a very basic level they operate similar to you. You assume that people want to be happy, and do not want to be sad. You take your basic knowlege, and see how that knowledge applies to women inside your sphere of inflence. Then, look at how it affects wthe women outside it. Begin the process over, refining your assumptions.
I am not saying that there is one way to interact with every man that will yield positive results. And if it will not work with our own kind (of whom we have a more developed understanding) it certainly will not work with women. I am saying that you can search for the way that will yeild positive results with each individual man in the same way. And you can serach for the way that will yeild positive results with each individual woman in the same way.
Confidence. Charisma. Charm. Three words that never fail. They change shapes, sizes, sounds, smells, and (well) tastes. If you are at a bar and you see a man whom you feel might be worth talking to - take a moment to look at him. Look at your past experience, how did you facilitate friendship with guys like him in the past? Approach in a similar fashion, modify and reaply your strategy as often as possible for optimal success. Women are poeple, use the same guidlines for meeting them.
Men are people, we want sex. Women are people, they want sex. Men are people, we want to recieve love (the responsibility described above). Women are people, they want to recieve love. In what fashion do we want sex and love? Im sure the who, when, where, why, and how that I want the what of love and sex are different than many of yours. I am a man. I am a person. It is reasonable then to say that women, who are people, have desparate needs regarding the who's, where's, when's, why's, and how's of love and sex.
A 30 year old muslim woman wants love and sex, just like the 20 year old american protestant. She may want it from a different man, in a different situation, at a different time, for a different reason, in a different way... but she still wants it.
Being gay is wrong. It contradicts nature. But that is all it does. Gays have the same potential for political, economic, social, emotional, and [relative] sexual success as the rest of us. There is no reason to harbor negative feelings about them. Anyone who does is a failure at life. Harsh, but true. If you cannot understand that their quest for love and sex depends on a vastly different who, where, when why, and how - you will never understand women. And so you will not succeed in your own quest for sex and love, because you cannot see their who, where, when why, and how.