A little perspective needed

mrgoodstuff

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I picture @DEEZEDBRAH as a buff guy at the gym with NEXTSET across his chest in that classic Latin font. That said, I do think there are gems of wisdom in his main points. Follow your purpose, don't waste your time on trash. I sort of dismissed him at first but the more I read his posts the more I like him.
He has the right mindset. Does not get his mind cluttered or slowed down by bullshyt in the game and he's getting his. Bigdave17 would be slaying several fine babes a week with this mindset.
 

ohrein

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He has the right mindset. Does not get his mind cluttered or slowed down by bullshyt in the game and he's getting his. Bigdave17 would be slaying several fine babes a week with this mindset.
Yep, I do respect him. Strong frame and living his life. That is something everyone should strive for their own version of.
 

Igetit!

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I thought @Igetit! was a little pessimistic but it seems he was on the money.
Naw......not pessimistic,realistic. I simply read everything that's being said,then try to come to a rational conclusion.

See,this was not his first thread about this girl. And whenever someone makes more than one thread about a chick or situation,ME PERSONALLY....I combine the two. I look at the second and any following threads as a continuation of the first.

Some things are just evident...they should be clear. When you see multiple signs that all seem to pointing in one direction,the ending result shouldn't a surprise. If I see/smell smoke,feel heat,and see a orange glow......well TO ME,that signals a fire.

If the sky turns dark,there's gray clouds everywhere,the wind is blowing,and drops of rain start falling from the sky,well guess what.....A storm is coming.

I don't know....just seems like common sense to me.

They went out multiple times,but never called them "dates"....
He never said or did anything sexual towards her....
She kept saying,"We're just friends....right? We're not dating each other....right?"
She said to him,"You're not expecting sex from me.....are you? My roommate said you were expecting sex,but you aren't.....right?"

I mean for pete's sake,the chick told him he reminded of her father. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/you-remind-me-of-my-father.249248/


I see ALL THAT....take all that into consideration,and what conclusion should I arrive to? What..."Oh yeah...go for it dude,that chick's hot for you. She's just BEGGIN' for you to make a move."???

That's why I didn't understand everyone telling him to go for it. But hey,whatever...it be what it be.


 

flowtheory

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Naw......not pessimistic,realistic. I simply read everything that's being said,then try to come to a rational conclusion.

See,this was not his first thread about this girl. And whenever someone makes more than one thread about a chick or situation,ME PERSONALLY....I combine the two. I look at the second and any following threads as a continuation of the first.

Some things are just evident...they should be clear. When you see multiple signs that all seem to pointing in one direction,the ending result shouldn't a surprise. If I see/smell smoke,feel heat,and see a orange glow......well TO ME,that signals a fire.

If the sky turns dark,there's gray clouds everywhere,the wind is blowing,and drops of rain start falling from the sky,well guess what.....A storm is coming.

I don't know....just seems like common sense to me.

They went out multiple times,but never called them "dates"....
He never said or did anything sexual towards her....
She kept saying,"We're just friends....right? We're not dating each other....right?"
She said to him,"You're not expecting sex from me.....are you? My roommate said you were expecting sex,but you aren't.....right?"

I mean for pete's sake,the chick told him he reminded of her father. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/you-remind-me-of-my-father.249248/


I see ALL THAT....take all that into consideration,and what conclusion should I arrive to? What..."Oh yeah...go for it dude,that chick's hot for you. She's just BEGGIN' for you to make a move."???

That's why I didn't understand everyone telling him to go for it. But hey,whatever...it be what it be.

Since our most previous hangout (the night of friendzoing), which ended well.. we haven’t been in contact. (Saturday night) today I messaged at 2pm that we should break her new hiking boots in later this week with a sunglasses emoji face (suggesting a hike). And she hasn’t yet responded.

Would it be normal to have this woman totally ghost and be gone from my life because of what played out, even though it has always been good vibes?

I mean, yea she said she still wants the friendship - and I do too - and would be mad if I stated ignoring her, but her actions are silence.

What’s your experience with this?
 

ohrein

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That's why I didn't understand everyone telling him to go for it.
Well I said in my original reply that he might have already blown it and sure enough he had. It's unusual to me that a woman would accept the sort of physical touching alone on the couch together on dates without any interest. Typically women who have no interest are very quick to stop any kino in my experience. But more importantly I think it's good to go for it just to be a man and to learn the lesson. Nothing teaches better than experience and if he'd just never tried he'd never know how the situation would have panned out. Now not only does he know, but we all know. It was a predictable outcome but every so often a hail mary delivers in spades so why not?
 

Spaz

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STOP TALKING and just DO. There is no need to tell her anything just grab her and pin her against the wall and kiss her passionately. If she has any interest in you she will be dripping all over the floor through her panties.

You are acting like the evil villain who tells everyone their plans in Geico commercial...stop.

Be like Nike...Just Do It.
Hahaha

This works out more times then it has not, using instincts I've done this countless of times.

And my excuse were always then and now; I couldn't help/control myself....;)
 

Spaz

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Naw......not pessimistic,realistic. I simply read everything that's being said,then try to come to a rational conclusion.

See,this was not his first thread about this girl. And whenever someone makes more than one thread about a chick or situation,ME PERSONALLY....I combine the two. I look at the second and any following threads as a continuation of the first.

Some things are just evident...they should be clear. When you see multiple signs that all seem to pointing in one direction,the ending result shouldn't a surprise. If I see/smell smoke,feel heat,and see a orange glow......well TO ME,that signals a fire.

If the sky turns dark,there's gray clouds everywhere,the wind is blowing,and drops of rain start falling from the sky,well guess what.....A storm is coming.

I don't know....just seems like common sense to me.

They went out multiple times,but never called them "dates"....
He never said or did anything sexual towards her....
She kept saying,"We're just friends....right? We're not dating each other....right?"
She said to him,"You're not expecting sex from me.....are you? My roommate said you were expecting sex,but you aren't.....right?"

I mean for pete's sake,the chick told him he reminded of her father. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/you-remind-me-of-my-father.249248/


I see ALL THAT....take all that into consideration,and what conclusion should I arrive to? What..."Oh yeah...go for it dude,that chick's hot for you. She's just BEGGIN' for you to make a move."???

That's why I didn't understand everyone telling him to go for it. But hey,whatever...it be what it be.

Totally agree. He screwed up from the start but needs closure on his own.

Which is why;

He should go for it and finally comes to terms, learn from it then move on.

It's all part of growing up into a man.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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Since our most previous hangout (the night of friendzoing), which ended well.. we haven’t been in contact. (Saturday night) today I messaged at 2pm that we should break her new hiking boots in later this week with a sunglasses emoji face (suggesting a hike). And she hasn’t yet responded.

Would it be normal to have this woman totally ghost and be gone from my life because of what played out, even though it has always been good vibes?

I mean, yea she said she still wants the friendship - and I do too - and would be mad if I stated ignoring her, but her actions are silence.

What’s your experience with this?
You can not be her cute buddy. If you are looking for a friend, hang out with a man. If you are looking for a girlfriend, man up and act like it. Whatever you do, do not be duplicitous.
 

Igetit!

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It's unusual to me that a woman would accept the sort of physical touching alone on the couch together on dates without any interest.
Naw man......you got the order of events mixed up. You're right about what you said here,but you got the sequence out of whack.

See,she WAS interested. It's not that she never had any interest at all,it just that the more time that passed by without him making a move,the more her interest waned until it died out. Them at his place,sitting on the couch drinking wine and talking for 6 hours.....that was their SECOND "date". The first was them going hiking. The mere fact that they even got together a second time shows interest on her part.....not to mention alone,ONE ON ONE at his house.

That was the PERFECT TIME AND PLACE for him to make a move. Perfect place because they were at his house,with no distractions or anything to bother/interrupt them,and perfect time cause she was there with him for SIX hours. I honestly feel like it was his failure at that moment that started the decline of her interest.


Typically women who have no interest are very quick to stop any kino in my experience.
I agree. But again....she HAD interest in the beginning. And there's a difference between a guy making a play,getting turned down,then him moving on to the next girl....versus him making a play,getting turned down,then them to becoming "friends" after the rejection. With the second,she might allow some kino if she believes the guy accepted her offer of friendship after turning him down,and believes the threat of sexuality from him is over.



Nothing teaches better than experience and if he'd just never tried he'd never know how the situation would have panned out. Now not only does he know, but we all know. It was a predictable outcome but every so often a hail mary delivers in spades so why not?
I guess so. There's enough people here to give various points of view.....we don't all have to agree.
 

Igetit!

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Since our most previous hangout (the night of friendzoing), which ended well.. we haven’t been in contact. (Saturday night) today I messaged at 2pm that we should break her new hiking boots in later this week with a sunglasses emoji face (suggesting a hike). And she hasn’t yet responded.
Well.....you remember everything I said over in reply #41,when you came up with your plan of telling her how you felt? How I said you should just let it go cause you'd likely make things awkward and uncomfortable between you two?

Well........

Would it be normal to have this woman totally ghost and be gone from my life because of what played out, even though it has always been good vibes?
YES. That is not uncommon. It's not easy for a woman to just brush all that emotional turmoil aside and continue on as "friends" like nothing ever happened. From her perspective,there's LOT MORE that went down here than you realize. She likely feels awkward,uncomfortable,foolish,and feels a little bad for having to reject you. Not to mention her having to go back to her roommate with egg on her face and having to tell her she was right.



I mean, yea she said she still wants the friendship - and I do too - and would be mad if I stated ignoring her, but her actions are silence.
Ok,well.....here's your FIRST test after this little fallout....let's see how much you've learned.

She "SAID"....."SAID"....."SAID".......she "SAID" she still wants the friendship.......but her "ACTIONS"......"ACTIONS"......"ACTIONS".....her "ACTIONS" are silence.

What sosuave principle concerning women is at play here....and what do you intend to do?


What’s your experience with this?
My personal experience is once it gets to the point where you are with this girl,it's over with.....the chick usually bounces to get away from the whole awkwardness of the situation. She may just need some time to let the awkwardness pass by,but typically,you usually won't hear from her again.

Not saying that's the case here,but that's generally what happens.
 

flowtheory

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I do accept responsibility here for the lack of sexual natures on my part. However in my defence at those points I wasn’t even thinking of kissing her yet; like I said, it was a slow blossimng of feelings. And I was enjoying that process as it was never dates at the start for me, it was expanding my social circle. Which for her was not, apparently.
I simply wasn’t aware because she had always told me. “I have a lot of guy friends, moreso than female”, “I’m not looking for sex, relationship or anything like that. Only if it was a ONS with a complete stranger on a holiday or something”

However, I’m not the only one to blame. When I break down all events that occurred, if she was interested from the start, she has then been lying to me from the start and not being transparent... saying she just wants friendship, didn’t want to ever kiss me, or feel that way towards me.
Then after she friendzoned me, i now do recollect her telling me that maybe somewhere down the line friendship would even be difficult with me because “you’re really atttactive and that would probably cause problems in the future”.
Which also is silly knowing that she has stated, she prefers having male friends over females. So if she lost her attraction for me by the time I admitted I had attraction, why go ghost?
And then she told me she would be mad at ME if I went radio silence on HER.

So literally, she’s told me the opposite of how she’s always felt from the start. I’ve dealt with a lot of women over the years and not always in a red pill savvy way. But there is a fair amount of dishonesty coming from her side.
 

flowtheory

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You can not be her cute buddy. If you are looking for a friend, hang out with a man. If you are looking for a girlfriend, man up and act like it. Whatever you do, do not be duplicitous.
Not being deceitful. I have now only intentions of friendship. Not a hidden motive of trying to persuade her to be anything else. It was honestly just good times hanging with her. I generally enjoy being friends with women.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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@DEEZEDBRAH #NEXTSET NEW WOMEN ARE TURNING 18 EVERY DAY!
Its the game changer. Not to mention, the short shelf life of top form femininity. Predisposition to bulking season. Meanwhile, hotter just turned 18/is on the way up.

I would rather a sugar baby then playing house and marriage with cratered SMV but, I digress.

LJBFs can be nuked by taking your d out. It obv don't guarantee pulling but. Makes for a hilarious story.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I do accept responsibility here for the lack of sexual natures on my part. However in my defence at those points I wasn’t even thinking of kissing her yet; like I said, it was a slow blossimng of feelings. And I was enjoying that process as it was never dates at the start for me, it was expanding my social circle. Which for her was not, apparently.
I simply wasn’t aware because she had always told me. “I have a lot of guy friends, moreso than female”, “I’m not looking for sex, relationship or anything like that. Only if it was a ONS with a complete stranger on a holiday or something”

However, I’m not the only one to blame. When I break down all events that occurred, if she was interested from the start, she has then been lying to me from the start and not being transparent... saying she just wants friendship, didn’t want to ever kiss me, or feel that way towards me.
Then after she friendzoned me, i now do recollect her telling me that maybe somewhere down the line friendship would even be difficult with me because “you’re really atttactive and that would probably cause problems in the future”.
Which also is silly knowing that she has stated, she prefers having male friends over females. So if she lost her attraction for me by the time I admitted I had attraction, why go ghost?
And then she told me she would be mad at ME if I went radio silence on HER.

So literally, she’s told me the opposite of how she’s always felt from the start. I’ve dealt with a lot of women over the years and not always in a red pill savvy way. But there is a fair amount of dishonesty coming from her side.
Life's too ****ing boring not try.

Mate, I strike out. I crash and burn but, I sldo take my **** out. Hot/cold? Ambivalent? Its a sure fire fight from go.

Even on a date once with some skank I later realized to be a SJW/feminist/cultural Marxist, I made out with before never talking with again.

Its not the point. I don't give give a ****. Sure, I don't like her but, my **** won't **** itself. Every chick is practice. More importantly, every set is a fire fight and stepping stone to self actualization. Being this strongest version of self.

**** being beta, soy boy, low testosterone, cucks.

Shot from the hip.

If you take the black pill, if you acknowledge the reality, that being cratered SMV, female hypergamy,Sloot gonna Sloot, provider male gets Chad's sloppy seconds only after the best day's are over;

Wtf do you have to lose?
 

flowtheory

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Okay.. so to gain some more insightful curious to know what’s actually happening here, because it is confusing..

This whole week her and I had plans to go for a hike - as friends which I’m cool with - tomorrow (sat). We had messaged very seldom, and it was fairly brief.
All week I had a gut feeling she was going to bail because she “feels” more distant. Low and behold she messaged me 1 hour ago, saying she wants to reschedule the hike (which is super annoying), but then suggests we meet up at this festival which is taking place tomorrow afternoon in my city. And I’m presuming she will be with her roommate or another friend.

What is this? It’s like she’s playing mind games now even though we’re just ‘friends’.
What’s with the behaviour change.
Any insights?
 

resilient

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We had messaged very seldom, and it was fairly brief.
All week I had a gut feeling she was going to bail because she “feels” more distant.
In those coms did you spark interest, flirt/humor, get her wondering?
...saying she wants to reschedule the hike (which is super annoying), but then suggests we meet up at this festival which is taking place tomorrow afternoon in my city.
Dude... she's leading you by switching the date idea. Festival is a social setting which makes it harder for you to isolate or build any real intimacy... too many distractions for her eyes to be invested heavily in convo.
What is this? It’s like she’s playing mind games now even though we’re just ‘friends’. What’s with the behaviour change. Any insights?
IMHO... it sounds like friend zoney stuff. I would get her to meet you for drinks or something more chill then big open crowds.
 

Igetit!

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Dude... she's leading you by switching the date idea. Festival is a social setting which makes it harder for you to isolate or build any real intimacy...
EXACTLY....
EXACTLY....
EXACTLY....

That's EXACTLY what I was thinking. It's also the same reason she invited a friend along (if you say she did).

This is just a guess........but I think she's trying to kill two turds with one stone......

She's trying to make it seem like the EMOTIONAL BOMB you dropped on her had no effect and everything is still the same as it was before when you two were getting together and hanging out all those times........but she DOESN'T TRUST YOU LIKE SHE DID BEFORE cause of you revealing your feelings.

So she agreed to meet up,to make it seem like nothing's changed.......but invited a third person along and changed the venue to a crowded place where you two CAN'T be alone,so she won't have to worry about you trying to "make a move" on her,or trying to get intimate in any way.

That way,you can't accuse her of being different or flaking,or not meeting up like she did in the past,while simultaneously killing any chances of you trying to go sexual on her again with her friend/roommate/all the other people being around.

Pretty smart,eh?
 

flowtheory

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EXACTLY....
EXACTLY....
EXACTLY....

That's EXACTLY what I was thinking. It's also the same reason she invited a friend along (if you say she did).

This is just a guess........but I think she's trying to kill two turds with one stone......

She's trying to make it seem like the EMOTIONAL BOMB you dropped on her had no effect and everything is still the same as it was before when you two were getting together and hanging out all those times........but she DOESN'T TRUST YOU LIKE SHE DID BEFORE cause of you revealing your feelings.

So she agreed to meet up,to make it seem like nothing's changed.......but invited a third person along and changed the venue to a crowded place where you two CAN'T be alone,so she won't have to worry about you trying to "make a move" on her,or trying to get intimate in any way.

That way,you can't accuse her of being different or flaking,or not meeting up like she did in the past,while simultaneously killing any chances of you trying to go sexual on her again with her friend/roommate/all the other people being around.

Pretty smart,eh?
Interesting. So she was interested, I missed the opportunity, then I revealed my feelings, it was too late, now she’s only wanting to hangout with me when her friends are there too to create buffers and remove any further depth building between her and I.

I understand, but at the same time, when she had feelings (seemingly based on her actions), why wouldn’t she want to enjoy what we had experienced together before? Because even back then we hadn’t kissed or done anything which would be considered romantic
 
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