4th Date & Still No Lay..Need some solid opinions please!! ASAP!

[jackhamma]

No disrespect but please only post if you have a good/high reputation, I am looking for guidance from the experienced DJ's on this forum, thanks!

I have been getting guidance from a very well know high rep user on this site privately and I just wanted to hear from others about this specific situation.

I am 27, this woman is 34. She is very independent, wealthy, and established. We have been on 4 solid dates. 3rd date we had dinner at my place, and fooled around in my bedroom but she would not let me sleep with her. She outright said "I am not an easy lay, and looking for someone to settle with." I still pushed, escalated, pushed some more, escalated and she would not give in.

We are both very attracted to each other, we have great conversation, kino is very high, especially on our last date which was Monday our make our session at the end of the date she was making a slight moan and really into the kissing more then she usually is. Even texted me an hour later saying to thank me and say how much fun she had.

I am looking for a girl to spend long term with, not a hit it and quit it so..

I just hit her up today asking to get together tomorrow night for dinner & a movie at my place. (waiting for her response back)

I do NOT want her controlling the frame...but I want to lock her down with a lay.

Am I being impatient? At this point should I except nothing but a date where I can get the potential lay? Or am I being impatient like I usually am?


What do you guys think!?

 

[hudpes]

No disrespect, but even as a guy with no "rep" I can see you're being impatient. She wants to go slow, but the point is - she wants. So quit the rulebook, let things escalate naturally, don't push, or she'll quit you because you wouldn't be recognized as someone she's looking for.

 

[jackhamma]

No disrespect, but even as a guy with no "rep" I can see you're being impatient. She wants to go slow, but the point is - she wants. So quit the rulebook, let things escalate naturally, don't push, or she'll quit you because you wouldn't be recognized as someone she's looking for.

No disrespect taken! I was actually thinking exactly what you wrote. I have NEVER taken my time and let things flow naturally, always PUSHED, always followed the "RULES". Maybe its time to try something new and see how it works?

 

[Harry Wilmington]

You are 27, she is 34. Meaning, because she is that old and not married, she's figured out part of the reason for that is because she's been giving it up too easily to men who weren't trying to commit. So yes, it may take longer to hook up with her. That is not necessarily a bad thing. For one, having sex does not guarantee you'll have her on lock - I've had plenty of one night stands and 2nd date hook ups that didn't end up in relationship territory. And second, waiting until she's ready will show her you respect her and actually want to be with her for who she is OUTSIDE the bedroom... Which will result in her being even more willing to do extra stuff when u two finally DO hook up.

I have more to type but I hate typin on an iPhone. I'll finish up later...

 

[spiegel549]

I actually have been patient with 2 women. Turned out it was worth the wait, ended up in some great LTR's. They ended due to me moving for a job, and another because I was a young idiot lol. Wait it out. Take your time, but just be a man and remain cool. YOU still run the show. No need to ask her to your bedroom every single time the date ends. SHE will when she is ready, make it obvious she is ready to fuk.

 

[jackhamma]

You are 27, she is 34. Meaning, because she is that old and not married, she's figured out part of the reason for that is because she's been giving it up too easily to men who weren't trying to commit. So yes, it may take longer to hook up with her. That is not necessarily a bad thing. For one, having sex does not guarantee you'll have her on lock - I've had plenty of one night stands and 2nd date hook ups that didn't end up in relationship territory. And second, waiting until she's ready will show her you respect her and actually want to be with her for who she is OUTSIDE the bedroom... Which will result in her being even more willing to do extra stuff when u two finally DO hook up.

I have more to type but I hate typin on an iPhone. I'll finish up later...

Thanks Harry! Looking forward to hearing the rest of what you have to say!

 

[TARKUS]

She outright said "I am not an easy lay, and looking for someone to settle with."

Typical mid 30's woman looking for a provider to settle with. Same woman who had no problem taking a bunch of c0cks all thru her 20's. Now she makes you wait for the sex. She is already dominating you. She knows she can hold you off because you are a safe bet. She knows you will do what she wants. She would fvck some other guy she isn't looking to settle with no problem. If she wanted that bad her legs would be wide open.

3rd date we had dinner at my place

One time, I had a girl flat-out tell me on our first date:

This stands out to me though. She was telling you this on your first date before you built any chemistry. She was able to make her decision to have sex during that time.

This guy already had 3 dates for this woman to make up her mind. She is telling him no after 3 dates. His escalation is being met with resistance. That isn't going to work because she has the upper hand. The 3rd date at his place was the night to have sex. It didn't happen.

She is using sex as a weapon. She's doing it now she can do it anytime. She's 34 for crying out loud. I think she's using her age as an advantage over him. The guys who wait and wait for sex are always the doormats in the relationship. It's time for her to put out or get out.

I am looking for a girl to spend long term with, not a hit it and quit it


I do NOT want her controlling the frame... but I want to lock her down with a lay.

Am I being impatient? At this point should I except nothing but a date where I can get the potential lay? Or am I being . impatient like I usually am?

Mr. Hamma is contradicting himself. You don't want a "Hit it And Quit it" but you are worried about no lay after the 4th date? :crackup:

 

[Albatross953]

I say let things progress, but make sure you're also at least being social with other women. If you're not sleeping together she's got no expectation of exclusivity.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Finally near a computer! Okay, to continue...

3rd date we had dinner at my place, and fooled around in my bedroom but she would not let me sleep with her. She outright said "I am not an easy lay, and looking for someone to settle with." I still pushed, escalated, pushed some more, escalated and she would not give in.

This is where most guys trip up. A woman says she wants to wait, and most will try to convince her otherwise. This is the WRONG way to play the game - if you escalate when she says she doesn't want to go further, it reads to her as if you're only in it for sex and her legs close up to you, possibly forever.

I've played this game a few times before, and the plan of action that's worked for me is to (a) be patient, and (b) go along with what they're FEELING at the moment. Notice I didn't say "go along with their words." If you do that, you'll never get to lay her because you'll read "I want to wait" as "I want to wait forever." You do not do this. What you do is go along with what she's FEELING.

For example: in the moment, she may very well SAY to you: "I don't want to do it." Fine then - don't do it, sit back, relax, and enjoy the evening. Now, while you're doing this you continue to show her a good time, make her laugh, cuddle up to her... everything but the sex stuff. As you're doing this, her little hamster wheel is thinking: "Wow, he's actually respecting me and not going after sex... what a relief... this guy is so great, I feel so comfortable around him... so comfortable, in fact, that I think I MAY want to have sex with him..."

I know, it sounds like a fluke, or that I'm making it up, but it works. One time, I had a girl flat-out tell me on our first date: "Just so we're clear, we're NOT hooking up anytime soon." I looked her dead in her face and told her: "That's cool, I'm just trying to get to know you better anyway, in whatever way that means. I can wait, it's cool." Yada yada yada, second date, it was going DOWN. Another girl I dated, she told me "Most guys try to hook up with me too soon, but I want to get to know a guy first before I sleep with him." My response: "Yeah, that's a good idea - plus, on my end, it's good to wait to see if the girl ends up being psycho anyway." 5 dates later, it went from "Oh no, we have to wait" to her going down on me and us doing it 4 times the first night.

In both these cases, their WORDS said one thing initially, but once I made them FEEL comfortable with me by showing them I respected them and didn't mind waiting, they felt okay with changing their minds a LOT sooner and hopping into bed with me. Basically, it boils down to making them FEEL like it's THEIR idea, that THEY are the ones pushing for it.

Now, that doesn't mean you don't escalate - what you'll find is, each time you do, you'll be able to get further and further with her. Maybe on the next date you'll make out and touch her breasts before she stops you, then the next time you'll get to finger her, etc. The important thing is, when she says stop or don't go further, stop IMMEDIATELY and just go back to cuddling on the couch (without looking angry). Ironically enough, I find the more I simply stop what I'm doing altogether, the more likely they are to want to do more. Like, if I'm about to finger her and she says "no no no, don't do that..." if I just stop and go back to cuddling, it's not much time before she's grabbing my hand and placing it back down there - at which point, I can then finger her and/or eat her out if I choose to.

Oh yeah - one more thing:

I just hit her up today asking to get together tomorrow night for dinner & a movie at my place. (waiting for her response back)

If you want to bang this girl, this is NOT the route to take.

The reason? You've already had her at your place for a date where you tried to score. Asking her for another in-home date is going to (a) make you seem lazy, like you're not trying to impress her (which you should be doing during the first 3 months of dating); and (b) make it look like you're only in this for the sex - which, as she's already told you, she's trying to be patient about.

Y'know what's funny? If you constantly ask a woman for home dates, I find they start to not want to do them because they know you're hoping to get them to your place for a lay. BUT - and here's the kicker - if you start asking them on every kind of date imaginable, and you end the night by NOT trying to take them to your place, they will usually find a way to either invite themselves over or invite you into THEIR place for what ends up leading to sex. Now, why is this, you ask? Think logically about it for a minute...


Go ahead, think about it....















Because part of a woman's ego is wrapped up in how attractive guys think they are, and one of the ways they can tell this is when guys try to take them home and have sex with them! Sure, she may reject the tons of offers she gets from men asking her to do this on every date she goes on, but she still likes the validation! So, what do you think happens when you go on a date, show her a good time, and then don't even MENTION wanting to take her home? That's right - she has NO VALIDATION from you that you find her attractive (despite you taking her out). And she NEEDS that validation. So, if you're not offering it, she has to ASK for it to get it. And if she's ASKING for it, and you agree to it, she can't then reject it because she's the one that asked for it.

In other words: if you take her out on an ACTUAL date - like, a dinner, dancing, movies, whatever - and end the night with a hot make out session followed by, "Well, I'll talk to you later" without saying the words "can you/I come up?," her brains going to be like "Wait, isn't this the part where he's supposed to try and jump into my pants?? He didn't even TRY to ask me!! Is something wrong with me? Is he finding me less attractive all of a sudden?? I have to know, I HAVE TO KNOW!!" What usually happens to me is, the girl will end up either inviting herself into MY place, or - if I'm dropping her off - asking me to come in for a little bit and "talk" before I go. And we all know what "talking" leads to at 11:30 at night

I guess I say all that to say: ditch the home dates for a bit. Ask her out on a couple of REAL dates with no mention of going back to either of your places. I promise you, it shouldn't take anymore than 3 dates max before she FEELS like you don't just want her for sex, and she's inviting you and her to one of your guys' place for some late night lovin'. Hope this helps!

 

[Trump]

I am 27, this woman is 34. She is very independent, wealthy, and established. We have been on 4 solid dates. 3rd date we had dinner at my place, and fooled around in my bedroom but she would not let me sleep with her. She outright said "I am not an easy lay, and looking for someone to settle with."

Translation: "Ive slept with enough alphas on the first date, I need a sucker I can control."

Anytime someone says something that you can discover or feel for yourself, alarm bells should go off.

I am looking for a girl to spend long term with, not a hit it and quit it so..

At this point should I except nothing but a date where I can get the potential lay?

I don't know bro, if you are not looking to hit it and quit it and want to build a relationship based in trust, love, and a deep emotional connection, then why do you care if it's the 4th date or 14 date? :nono:

 

[Jaylan]

If the dates have happened all within a few weeks, theres really no rush if the goal is a quality long term relationship. Youll prolly get to sex pretty soon. I mean, sex timelines arent necessary when looking for a quality woman. Plus you have to factor in how long and intimate your dates are...as well as how spread out theyve been. I can understand someone wanting to get to know someone well enough before jumping into the emotions that sex would create (given that you two are both looking long term).

So just go with the flow, but dont wait forever though. And definitely ignore the dudes blowing hot air about this woman's age or the fact that she doesnt want to give it up right away. They are making a lot of assumptions, and some men here dont realize that some women just arent into hooking up quickly. If they wanna assume shes been quick to bed in the past, thats on them.

Fact of the matter is that youre trying to determine her quality right now, and the fact that she shows impulse control and a desire to find something meaningful shows more quality than hopping in bed the first few dates. Could she be looking for a provider chump? Possibly. But thats up to you to sniff out. Half the guys on this forum love chicks who are easy and put out quickly, yet also bash chicks who wanna wait.

If this girl was 26 and said the same thing to you, guys here would be saying she slutted it up in her teens and during college, and is now settling. This would be said with no knowledge of the woman's background. Funny thing is, a close friend of mine has a fiance who was a virgin until they met a few years back. We are all in our late 20s now, and I can assure anyone this chick is as clean cut as they come. But if my buddy had come here talking about dates with no sex, certainly some dudes would have labeled her a former skank whos looking for a provider by not giving it up.

All in all OP, keep your eyes OP, really vet this woman, and go with the flow.

 

[Rival]

Honestly at this point "if" you get another date with her. I would act like IDGAF about sleeping with her. Kiss or whatever but don't push. Make her work for you.

You should have the advantage, your 27 and she is 34. Her value is going down and yours is on the rise etc.

I had some similar experience and when we were watching a movie and I just sat there..I swear the girls would get up and go to my damn room. (might be worth a try, sorry I don't have rep)

 

[goldengoose]

"A man without options is a man without pvssy, when the only one chick he is pursuing won't let him in and he feels like a wussy." - goldengoose

As I always say, if you had other options for sex, you wouldn't be so impatient with her.

If you're looking for an LTR, why the rush to get the lay? You are way too eager with her and she knows it.

Harry makes good point, instead of going to your place take her out to where you can go back after. That way you can determine if anything is going to escalate. If she is still holding up the show, then it's time to let to her go. You're just wasting your time on a chick giving you blue balls. If she is into you as much as you say she is, she will fvck you if she feels she is going to lose you. You just need to regain the frame and beat her at her own game. After 4 dates you should already know if she is LTR material, if not there's no reason to keep things going if you're not going to get laid.

Edit: I can now say that I'm pretty sure this guy is a troll. Not wasting my time with this sh1t.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

A lot of different theories on this.

I know some advocate within 4-5 dates or walk away. I've also heard 5-6 hours contact time, then walk away if it hasn't happened.

Having said that, she's a bit older and she's not going to be easy like a 20 year old. But then, my ex was 32 when I met her and we pretty much did it first night.

My current main plate took a little while to warm up, may be 5-6 dates, 8-10 hours contact time. but she's a 24yr old 9/10. Bear in mind hotter women don't need to give it up as easily, because they can at any time.

If you disappear for a while and become a bit unavailable, she'll be begging for it soon enough. It's a good time to do it, because you already got her wet, but didn't fulfil the deed. Assume the power my friend! Does sound like it will happen pretty soon though. Patience is a virtue!

 

[jackhamma]

Date #5 Update - PLEASE ADVISE ME!

I have to start by saying how awesome it was reading the replies. Every single one of you gave valid solid points. I agree with almost 100% of what you guys are saying. I know you all don't know every single detail with this woman but details on Date #5 should be good enough for you guys to help me make a decision on whats really going on.

I can not possibly remember, nor write every detail that has happened but I will do my best to help summarize and add notes so you can be fully up to par.

Background

Met her on July 4th through a friend at the beach. She was very attractive, we got talking, exchanged numbers. She was suggesting I should stay and go drinking with her but I had to leave because my ride was taking off. The next day I said WTF and hit her up to go out. We went out, had fun, sealed with a Kiss.

We have been on 4 solid dates since then. To save a lot of time I will go into detail on tonight's date with notes through out so you can see where I am at.

Date #5

Waited 2 days since the last date, texted her to get together for Thursday. She suggested tonight instead. I threw a place to eat out there, she said how about xyz instead. She has literally picked every place we have been out so far. She knows a lot better places then I do because she has money, and has been almost everywhere so I didn't care, I went with the flow of her suggestion.

Every single time I pull up to her place she makes me wait. Says she will be down in 5minutes turns into 20. Last date she did that I texted her "Tonight doesn't really seem like a good night for you, lets reschedule." She ended up apologizing and convincing me to stay.

Back to Date #5. She gets in the car and we kissed on the lips. (recently she has been giving me her cheek which was odd) Drove to a restaurant up the street from her, had a nice meal, talked about random things, talked about health (we are both fitness nuts) etc. Everything seemed to be going smooth. (For the record she is very outspoken and spunky)

After dinner I suggested we go for a drink, so we walked across the street to a popular tavern. Had 1 drink each, and this is where like every other date I feel like she sh!t tests me by bringing up stupid random crap. She started by talking about kids with down syndrome to the Espy awards. She mentioned how she was invited to the playboy mansion. I said "cool you should go!" she goes "well ya a chance to hang around hot male athletes like who wouldn't want to go!" I was immediately turned off. I thought it was just rude like if I said "Yeah a chance to hang out with really hot girls!" while I am on a date is just rude, no?

She then threw around (for the second time) that we have only been on 3 dates, because the first date didn't really count, and the other "Date" blah blah.

At this point I was turned off, so I said "Okay lets get going." she was like "Wait what?" I was like "Yeah I have work, unless you want to do something low key? like watch a movie?" she said "we are not watching a movie at my house my room is a mess." I said "we could watch a movie by me?" she didn't respond. I said "Ok ill just drive you home, we can do a movie another night." she goes "well we can watch a movie...its just everytime a guy invites me back to his house he is basically trying to ****, and I am not gonna **** you in only 3 dates." I was like "Its not a big deal, I didn't invite you back to **** your brains out, I invited you for a movie." she goes "yeah well your telling me if I didn't try something you wouldn't ****?" I said "uhh sure I would who the **** wouldn't? Lets just go watch a movie lol."

We get to my place and go inside, put a movie on in my room. After that heated convo back and forth I had no desire to make a move on her. She is laying on me on my bed watching a movie and she was letting me grab her ass, touch where ever I wanted, but I can just TELL she would not of let me fuk her if I tried something so I didn't push. She literally said "guys that try to push and push for sex really turn me off." So once again I was not gonna push after a comment like that.

We had some good laughs during the movie, I was massaging her neck and shoulders during the movie, she would make little comments thanking me etc. I said "Could I get a massage after?" She goes "nahhh" I was like but I am massaging you! she goes "well I didn't ask you to massage me." fuking c-word lol.

She then brought up a story about porno, and that all men watch porn and her ex and I quote "I ****ed my ex 3-4 times a day and HE STILL WATCHED PORN it was a big problem with us.." lol.

Driving her home after the movie, we got in a small argument because she always mentions about how she knows some guy who blah blah blah. and the guys she mentions are always FUKING LOSERS. Oh I knew a drug dealer that....or I knew this guy that....etc. I said "wow you know some real winners lol." she basically defended herself saying she knows a lot of people but its not like she associates with them, she had a rough child hood growing up etc.

We arrive to her house, and I get out, she makes out with me like she was LOVING IT like she always does at the end of the date. "Have a nice day tomorrow." she says then we Kiss more. I left.

Notes to Know about her to help put the pieces of the puzzle together

-She makes A LOT of money

-She is a control freak. Has to be her way. Not very open to other ways of handling things.

-She is extremely independent

-She is NOT a big public display of affection type of girl. I noticed tonight she would stop holding my hand when she saw someone she knew that grooms her dog..weird?

-She is Colombian. BIG ass, big nice tits, but she thinks she is a princess.

-Drives a high end Mercedes Benz, I drive a Toyota. She always gives me her keys and says "Lets take my car!" guess she doesn't like my Honda lol.

-Every date we have been on where we get food or drinks she doesn't suggest high end pricey places. It has always been moderate priced but FUN spots.

A note from me

I actually like spending time with this woman. I know after reading this I really pointed out all the negative crap and didn't mention any of the positive stuff but the thing is I am very outspoken and very confrontational and NOT afraid to disagree. Where she is the same damn way. I think that is why we clash a bit...but I like it...lol

I feel like once she does let me fuk her its going to be amazing and she will want to bang 3-4 times a day, then a side of me thinks I am wasting my fuking time & money, and she is going to drag me a long and toss me away with no sex.


I can't determine to go forward, or walk away.

Please help me figure out what my best course of action is. I liked reading that I need to pretend like I don't even want the sex, and that I shouldn't even try to hold her hand. SHE IS DEFINITELY A WOMAN THAT NEEDS VALIDATION I feel like sometimes I have to go out of my way to Kiss her during the date, or hold her hand. Should I stop trying to do it?

Please advise, THANKS!

 

[Harry Wilmington]

My first thought when reading all this: I dated an Armenian girl that sounds similar to this girl. She's the one who told me on the first date we weren't going to bang, and on date #2 she invited herself into my place to watch a movie, told me the whole time she was there we weren't going to do it, then ended up hooking up with me at 3 in the morning that same date. This girl also was very outspoken, sarcastic, and had dealt with guys of questionable character during her life, including abusive exes.

In short: BAGGAGE.

The good news: this kind of chick isn't hard to bang. The BAD news: they are NOT ones you want to end up dating because they're going to constantly have drama going on in their lives.

On to your actual report:

Met her on July 4th through a friend at the beach. She was very attractive, we got talking, exchanged numbers. She was suggesting I should stay and go drinking with her but I had to leave because my ride was taking off. The next day I said WTF and hit her up to go out. We went out, had fun, sealed with a Kiss. We have been on 4 solid dates since then.

4 dates in less than 2 weeks? No bueno - you should only see her once a week in the beginning. The LESS she sees of you early on, the BETTER chance you have of sleeping with her sooner since you're not spreading yourself too thin by seeing her too much.

Waited 2 days since the last date, texted her to get together for Thursday. She suggested tonight instead.

Coming off too eager. Great that she counter-offered, but accepting a last-minute date (assuming you asked her out Wed for Thurs) signals you have no other options and are needy of her attention. You should have shown patience by agreeing to a later day, saying you already had plans for that evening.

I threw a place to eat out there, she said how about xyz instead. She has literally picked every place we have been out so far.

Control freak, I'd already be walking away. A girl should be happy to be in your company, regardless of where you choose to go. This isn't to say she can't ever have a say in what you guys do on a date, but in the beginning she should go with the flow and look forward to whatever date surprises you have planned. She's already showing she's going to be bossy, both with the sex thing and the choosing of dates - not worth it in my opinion.

Every single time I pull up to her place she makes me wait. Says she will be down in 5 minutes turns into 20.

You have to learn to start making chicks respect your time. I once dated a girl who was late for our first 3 dates. On date 4, we were supposed to go to a play; I didn't have a car at the time so she said she'd pick me up. She ended up being almost an hour late picking me up; when she pulled up I came out NOT dressed up, and told her we weren't going out tonight because, again, she was late, and said we weren't going to see each other anymore. Why? Because it's disrespectful and RUDE for a person to not consider another person's time.

She mentioned how she was invited to the playboy mansion. I said "cool you should go!" she goes "well ya a chance to hang around hot male athletes like who wouldn't want to go!"

Very rude. Some women don't feel like it's a big deal if they mention other guys on a date. Stupid, but true.

She then threw around (for the second time) that we have only been on 3 dates... At this point I was turned off, so I said "Okay lets get going." she was like "Wait what?" I was like "Yeah I have work, unless you want to do something low key? like watch a movie?"... she goes "well we can watch a movie...its just everytime a guy invites me back to his house he is basically trying to ****, and I am not gonna **** you in only 3 dates." I was like "Its not a big deal, I didn't invite you back to **** your brains out, I invited you for a movie." she goes "yeah well your telling me if I didn't try something you wouldn't ****?" I said "uhh sure I would who the **** wouldn't? Lets just go watch a movie lol."

NO MORE HOME INVITES. If she's not trying to bang you two shouldn't be there anyway; I only invite girls back if I'm sure they're down for the get down, which will happen when she mentions going back to my place. GREAT response to her, though, about if you would try something were she to come on to you. Most guys would say "no, of course not" but that's not a realistic response. How dumb of a question is that anyway - like, does the woman assume if she came on to you that you'd be like "no no no, you said you didn't want to do that??" Get the heck outta here...

We get to my place and go inside, put a movie on in my room... She is laying on me on my bed watching a movie and she was letting me grab her ass, touch where ever I wanted, but I can just TELL she would not of let me fuk her if I tried something so I didn't push.

Shouldn't have had her on the bed. Again, we're going by what she said in the moment until she FEELS differently. You have her on the couch sitting up watching the movie. If she wants to go to your bed, she'll mention it, at which point you'd say "lol, I thought you weren't trying to do that." You stopping her from going to your bed will only make her want to do it even more - it's a mind game, but one that can work quite effectively if played right...

We had some good laughs during the movie, I was massaging her neck and shoulders during the movie, she would make little comments thanking me etc. I said "Could I get a massage after?" She goes "nahhh" I was like but I am massaging you! she goes "well I didn't ask you to massage me."

This chick is all about herself - if that's the kind of chick you're in to, proceed. Otherwise, it would be a WRAP for me.

She then brought up a story about porno, and that all men watch porn and her ex and I quote "I ****ed my ex 3-4 times a day and HE STILL WATCHED PORN it was a big problem with us.." lol.

She brought up the ex, bragged about having constant sex with him, and told you that she tried to control his porn watching? No bueno.

Driving her home after the movie, we got in a small argument because...

You've only been on 4 dates with this woman and you're already arguing?? No bueno - the first 3 months are supposed to be the EASIEST. If you're already fighting with her by date 4 or 5, imagine how many more serious arguments you're going to get into with this woman over the course of the next 6 months? 12 months? 5 years? Ugh...

...she always mentions about how she knows some guy who blah blah blah. and the guys she mentions are always FUKING LOSERS. Oh I knew a drug dealer that....or I knew this guy that....etc. I said "wow you know some real winners lol." she basically defended herself saying she knows a lot of people but its not like she associates with them, she had a rough child hood growing up etc.

BAGGAGE. And she makes horrible life choices about the people she hangs out with. Not a good sign...

-She makes A LOT of money -She is a control freak. Has to be her way. Not very open to other ways of handling things. -She is extremely independent -She is Colombian. BIG ass, big nice tits, but she thinks she is a princess. -Drives a high end Mercedes Benz, I drive a Toyota. She always gives me her keys and says "Lets take my car!" guess she doesn't like my Honda lol.

All these things scream "control freak" to me. I see it being a HUGE problem later. She's not ever going to want to listen to you or follow your ideas because she NEEDS to be in control. Eventually, she's going to try and push you to be something you may not want to be just so you can be impressive enough to show off to friends (i.e. not driving your Toyota - which are nice cars - because it embarrasses her). And, she's a princess so regardless of what you do she'll never be satisfied.

I actually like spending time with this woman. I know after reading this I really pointed out all the negative crap and didn't mention any of the positive stuff but the thing is I am very outspoken and very confrontational and NOT afraid to disagree. Where she is the same damn way. I think that is why we clash a bit...but I like it...lol

Honestly, guy, that's something you need to work on. I know you're saying you're confrontational like it's a "but that's just the way I am" sort of thing. The reality, though, is that it's a learned behavior. Being opinionated vs. being confrontational are two different things, and if you're constantly doing things to provoke a fight or argument, that's a HUGE problem that could be preventing you from having a long-term girlfriend. Not everything that is brought up in conversation needs to be confronted, nor is everything a personal attack on you (which can be taken that way by confrontational people). Anyway, TWO confrontational people can't work out - by definition, if there is always a confrontation brewing, fights are going to constantly occur.

I feel like once she does let me fuk her its going to be amazing and she will want to bang 3-4 times a day

But who cares if it's going to be followed by drama? Plus - and this should be a no-brainer - there are TONS of other women out there you can have AMAZING sex with. Most pvssies feel the same, and once you're with a girl for a while the sex gets better (at least in my experience) because you know each others' bodies more than you did when you first hooked up. Don't be blinded by her Columbian behind - that culo is smuggling in some not-needed drama and bossiness!

That's all I got for now - keep us posted!

 

[MtnMan]

http://www.returnofkings.com/37616/how-to-handle-women-with-a-ticking-biological-clock

this may apply some, i have experienced this with women that are 30 or older. I gave up because a hotter 24 year old will fvck on the first or second date, so why bother?

 

[wishyo]

Wow man you are obsessed with fvcking her.. Just enjoy your time with high end lady and be happy she has interest in you; being so obsessed with sex makes you so needy imo... If she doesn’t want it, it should be fine with you, you “theoretically” have hundreds of other girls you could bang so not having sex with her shouldn’t be a big deal for you, be the first guy (too late I guess) who doesn’t want to fvck her ASAP. That’s my 2 cents
‘murica is so ‘murican. The Russian girl I am dating right now told me I was going too fast when I kissed her on like 4th date, not sure if all Russian girls are like this.. Will find out soon I guess. We are much younger than you guys anyways so it’s different.

 

[jurry]

Agree with goldengoose above.

Sounds like she definitely into you, has totally dominated you though because she KNOWS YOU HAVE NO OTHER OPTIONS. And she knows this because you keep trying to fvck her and inviting her back to your place and it makes you sound like a desperate puppy.

There are of course many dominant women out there and many guys who like that, so maybe thats just your thing? But dont be confused or surprised about what is happening here or what will happen going forward. Once she has utterly conquered you she will allow you to have sex with her, leading into a very one sided relationship (which may work for both of you who knows) or she will drop you once she realizes you have no balls and move on to someone else.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

Lol, remember that there was probably guy that fvcked her the night he met her