4 years and I have had it.

Neomic2005

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Hello everybody, I have been in a relationship for 4 years now and I just don't know what to do anymore. I had the last straw today when I met up with a few guys who were going to modify their car and I asked her to come with me and when we got there she told me "I feel uncomfortable" and I told her I don't know these people too but I just want to see their car so then we went and she sat down with me and she had this mad look on her face, man I was so embarassed, like the other people had this look on their face was why was she looking so mad. Thing is, my girlfriend always does this. Even when she was here for New Years she sits on the couch with a mad grouchy look on her face and my parents ask me if she's mad and I say no.

Then we ended up leaving and she kept telling me that I'm not myself anymore how I used to be and that I've changed and she looked at my phone and found out some guy from my old working place called me and she went ballistic wondering why somebody was calling me. I have no friends in my life other than people I talk to secretly online. Back in February 2004 she said she wanted time apart and she ****ed around with this other guy and I don't know why I wanted her back, I guess it's because I was with her for soo long it's like I'm used to her. Plus, I was with her at a young age. She's not even hot too. She's fat. She's overweight and short. But see, looks to me is just a bonus I guess, I met her online and she had a great personality and I thought she was fun to be around and when I met her and she was fat I didn't really care. I just want to settle down and be with a devoted girl.

Since this is my first girlfriend, I want to know how to end this? I told her "Let's just be friends" and she told me "Look I told you, I don't even want to be your friend because I will have the urge to hold you and want to kiss you and I can't do it if we're friends" My parents want me to dumb her because of all the bull**** she put me through. I just need some advice for the experts out there, How can I truly be finished with her and just forget about her. I know I always wish we never met and I know deep down in her heart if God gave her the chance to fall out of love for me, she would. It's the fact that she "loves me" that she can't let go or something.
 

thefonz

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Buy fattie a happy meal and a vibrator and send her down the yellow brick road
 

skinnydart

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Dude, get rid of her. Just start being kinda mean to her. Like buy her that treadmill for Christmas or something.

Ignore her when she's pouting. Just walk up to her and say "hey sara, I'm heading off to look at a car with these guys, I'll be back in 2 hours." then turn around and walk off. You're the guy, don't let her push you around.

She'll either change real fast (not likely) or she get tired of you and dump you (what you're looking for anyway).
Look I told you, I don't even want to be your friend because I will have the urge to hold you and want to kiss you and I can't do it if we're friends
LOL, man, this whole thing reminds me of Chandler and Janice. :p
 

klaz

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Thing is, my girlfriend always does this.
Danger sign. She's an attention *****, with serious issues. Personally, I'd say drop her like the dead-weight stone she's behaving like.

Then we ended up leaving and she kept telling me that I'm not myself anymore how I used to be and that I've changed and she looked at my phone and found out some guy from my old working place called me and she went ballistic wondering why somebody was calling me.
You've been together for 4 years. People change. Unfortuently she hasn't changed enough. She's being incredibly insecure, and you're not there to help with it. You can't. Fat women generally have more issues with jealousy (of boyfriends friends). Again, she sounds somewhat of a psycho. Drop her.

I just want to settle down and be with a devoted girl.
Buy a thai bride. They're slim and will be devoted. ;)

It's the fact that she "loves me" that she can't let go or something.
She doesn't love you, or at least this is what i'm getting from your post. She loves having you around as her punch bag. You're taking all her crap, and letting her get away with it. I'm sorry to say this, but you're being a wuss. You need to assert your manhood (so to speak).

I'd advise against the sit-down breakup. She sounds like a drama-hog. Do you have the Ron Louis and David Copeland book? the end of the book suggests some good scenario's for these types of "girls".
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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As someone said, she's an attention *****. She's also a drama queen. Two extremely annoying combinations. Drop her as soon as possible. Tell her straight up that you're sick of her attitude and don't enjoy being around her.
 
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Neomic man, pick up that phone. Do it now! Get over to her place, break up, and get her out of your life. Sort everything out ASAP so you don't need to see each other, then make sure you don't.

She'll get over you in time, and if you don't want to spend the rest of your life with her, she may as well start getting used to that sooner rather than later. You're doing her a favour by not wasting her time.

You're doing yourself a favour by escaping the drama. If you need some inspiration search for a 5 star post, something like "dodged the bullet" by Pook. Classic read.

If you're still with her tomorrow, shame on you.
 

Disconnect

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She cheated on you. Enough said.





by the way, do yourself a big favor and read the bible.
 

Wyldfire

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This girl has a very, very low self esteem and is incredibly insecure. Basically, she views herself so badly that she's trying to keep you isolated because she's afraid of losing you.

You can't fix what's wrong with her...she needs to do that on her own. But you don't have to be and should NOT be her personal doormat, either.

Yes, 4 years is a long time to invest in a relationship to just walk away. However, 4 years in a relationship with an emotional terrorist such as this woman is an eternity. Don't you think it'd be better to break it off after 4 years than wait until you've invested 10 years in a "dead end go no-where and feel like sh*t relationship"?

Break up with her, the sooner the better and do NOT look back.
 

Craig Reeves

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Hm. As I would agree to most of the people on this thread, I have to say something...

Just because she's short, fat, or both.....THAT'S not what makes her an emotional suckerfish...

It's the fact that she's just an insecure person. Even if she was tall and thin that wouldn't change her. Just dump her....there's no point in trying to make her change.

Some of you are acting as if her weight and height is the reason for her insecurity and self esteem issues...Well I'm here to tell you there are PLENTY of HB's that are exactly the same as she is (if not worse).

I know it seems like I'm dwelling on this for a long time, but it's stupid to assume that every girl who wears anything above a size 6 has a low self esteem.

It's even stupider (and dangerous) to assume that every ATTRACTIVE woman is automatically going to be secure, confident, and intellegent, because that mentallity will lead you into all kinds of trouble.

A man with this mindset will almost always get crushed when his expectations about some super hot woman get frusterated because she turns out not to be nearly as great as he thought she would be. It also forces men to place these kinds of women on a pedistal as if these women automatically, because they're attractive, have thier lives together, know themselves, and are automatically a good catch.

This is why I say to RAISE YOUR STANDARDS. STOP dating girls ONLY on their looks. Start looking for MORE than just looks. I know this post doesn't have much to do with your thread, but I'm just saying....
 

SeldomSeen

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RE:

in all honesty I can say that its time you both went your separate ways because you're miserable and she needs to learn how to live without being dependent on you. Both of you will get nothing out of this relationship if you stay in it but you may see the light if you both call its quits. I know how hard that is, its not about her weight or any of that its about the emotional energy and the time you've put in and that cant be replaced but what can be is any future setbacks or letdowns. Again I say this not just for your sake but for both of you.

Peace
 

Homeslice

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Perhaps this will wake you up a bit.

I was in the exact opposite situation almost to the tee, even in February 2004...

I was the one ****ing the girl who had an ex boyfriend of four years who she thought she still loved and couldn't let go of and was moody all the time, etc. etc. (although she wasnt fat, but short I suppose)...

The feelings you both are feeling are ones of both jealousy and just feelings from being with the same person for so long. Remaining together can only screw up future relationships that you will have and that she will have, and honestly its just not worth it.

I guarantee there's a lot better girls out there, I've seen this happen first hand though so many times I think I can offer good advice about it.

You aren't from Missouri are you? :D
 

Neomic2005

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I guess I am bit to blame too because I make the mistake with sticking to her. I know the reason why too. I have no other friends and I only have her in my life other than family. Yes, I was planning on leaving her for sure when I found somebody else but I am what you call it in a 'love-hate' relationship, like I am only using her to be with until I find someone else and she probably is doing the same **** too. How should I cope with being single and not having anybody in my life until the time comes when I meet that special somebody? I guess that's the only fear I'll be facing. But then again, I'm embarassed to even be seen with her in public, it's pathetic so I know it'll be nothing but good to leave her once and for all.
 

SeldomSeen

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RE:

Originally posted by Neomic2005
How should I cope with being single and not having anybody in my life until the time comes when I meet that special somebody?
Thats just the thing. You have to get away to find yourself and what truly makes you happy without any external influences. Join a gym or a club or something to occupy your time. Get yourself a nice book collection and read up on some things. Take up a new hobby. The truth of the matter is you arent happy with her. Forget the other replies about her being fat and dumping her for a hot girl because if you arent happy with you then a hot babe isnt going to make you any happier. Its time to make bold moves in your life and that starts by telling yourself and her that you are no longer interested in pursuing the relationship any further. Walk away after that. You cant be friends in this situation either because she's not mature enough to handle you wanting to be alone. Sometimes the best stregnth comes from letting go.


peace

Seenseldomly!
 

The DomMega

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Man, I kinda feel bad for this cat. He's really got no clue what he's got going on his life with this girl. No worries though, let me see if I can't break this down for ya one time.

You're both playing off each others emotions for one thing. When she turns into a whiny ass *****, you're right there running behind her saying sorry. This is a turnoff to her in general. There's nothing seductive about having a guy that kisses his girlfriend's ass whenever possible. The fact you've been with this girl for 4 years with an attitude like she's got is proof of this.


I didn't check your age before posting this so I'm assuming your a little on the younger side, at least I hope you are. Wasting 4 years of your life on a girl like this, regardless of any friend and/or family situations is in injustice to yourself. No man should have to deal with that ****. You also have some major self-esteem issues. This girl cheated on you, knowingly and you're still with her. Its not like she tripped and fell and landed on some guys ****, SHE CHEATED ON YOU! Only someone with a low self-esteem and low self-worth would put up with a travesty such as that. I think you need to re-evaluate your life and make a conscious effort to make a change for the better. You sound like a nice guy, which can be a problem in itself, but even so I'm going to go ahead and say you deserve better as a human being. Even if you're unaware of how to get it, the first step is admitting that a change needs to be made.

Lastly before this turns into a novel, what do you mean you don't know how to break it off with this girl? Thats the least of your worries. Call her up, say you don't want to see her anymore. She's a cancer in your life and needs to be cut out. Or you can tell her to meet you somewhere and you can tell her that **** to her face. You can also mention that she may want to seek some medical attention/counseling for some of her behavioral issues because that ****s not healthy. Or you can just straight break up with her over her answering machine, who cares. Point is you gotta get rid of this broad. She's been holding you back for 4 years. Check your pants, make sure you've got some testicles and a penis in there, if you do break up with this life support system for a vagina and move on!

Changing for the better starts with you and you alone mang.
 

The DomMega

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haha, my bad words got censored. Thats a first.

Sometimes I accentuate verbally. ;)
 

Neomic2005

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Thanks for the motivation DomMega. Yeah I'm still young, I'm 19. I was with her since March of 2001 I was only a Sophomore in High School and she has been my FIRST and only girlfriend. now the reason I ask I don't know how to break it off is because over the 4 years we've fought so much times where we say we're through and everything and we end up getting back together. It's like saying "we're through" is a joke now because we always go back to each other.

yeah back in February of 2004 I really thought it was over because she told me she wanted time apart and the idiot I was cried yeah what a ***** I was because of being scared of being alone and having nobody in my life, but anyway, she was with this guy but he's in the military so he went out of state and then I told her give me another chance and she wouldn't and I guess after a while she did she claims he pulled out his d1ck but she didn't **** him or anything and the reason she didn't like him anymore is because of his past with girls and how he was into cars and car clubs and now since I have a great car that I want to learn more about I go to car message boards and talk to people who live around my area about them and she gets pissed like "YOU ARE ACTING LIKE CASEY!!" (the guy she was with in feb) but yeah enough of the ranting.. I'm gonna leave her cause when I step out of my body and look at myself I don't see myself with her. It's like the odd couple anyway we have NOTHING in common and I don't even know why we lasted this long just keep on running back to each other. Hell her parents hate me and my parents hate her lol. It's time for me to face the pain.
 
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