2nd date , she wants dinner wont let me pick her up ? Doesnt wanna drink ?

[KindredSpiritzz]

Yeah true but the first date was a first date, i may msg her tomorrow and go im not in the mood to eat leta do somthing else. Or when we meet in person ill go im not that hungry lets grab a yougurt or somthing . Screw her. I dont want these cu#ts taking my money

i don't know, if shes expecting dinner she's gonna show up hungry and yogurt is just gonna make you look like a cheap SOB and shes not gonna want to bang that. Suck it up, cough up $50 for dinner and be better prepared next time this situation comes around. You lost frame going into this date. Guess the bottom line is how into her are you?

 

[Rake101]

i don't know, if shes expecting dinner she's gonna show up hungry and yogurt is just gonna make you look like a cheap SOB and shes not gonna want to bang that. Suck it up, cough up $50 for dinner and be better prepared next time this situation comes around. You lost frame going into this date. Guess the bottom line is how into her are you?

Just into her sexually i only wanna have her as a plate to bang here and there. Shes not ltr material

 

[KindredSpiritzz]

well is she worth a dinner to bang or have as a potential plate? Cause no dinner now i think blows your chances.

 

[RickTheToad]

Hb 8 , first date we met up had dinner then venue chnaged to bar i done some touching, had fun. At the end kissed her for abit she said she had ti go home.

2nd date , i offered to pick her up she said shes happy to drive and i mentioned drinks and she said she doesnt feel like drinking and dinner is good
So what are your thoughts?
I feel she wants to drive so she has more control, but im really not keen on a dinner date wasting money then she leaves after and i get nothing. She lives alone so i wanted to try and venue chnage to hers but the fact that she wont let me pick her up tells me shes doing it so its harder for me.to have sex with her etc

Me personally i hate wasting my money on girls and getting no sex tbh
What you guys think ? If i feel shes just going to have food and leave ill tell her she can pay for the bill lol
I want to lead but shes making it hard. Do u thinking im thinking too much since its only thr 2nd date ? Or im right and shes not too keen maybe just wasting time with me till she finds somone she really wants because i know these hoes go clubs and fu#k randoms and shes making it hard for me after already meeting once and me buying dinner.
Yes i know i dont like doing dinner dates either but she doesnt wanna drink appernlty. As for the drinks we had after dinner she brought them so yeah
Thoughts??

Offer to come to your place and you cook for her. Or, you can Netflix and chill with some pizza and wings. She's just looking for a free meal. Fvcking before feeding. However, cooking at your home is pretty cheap; as is pizza. She says, no, say thank you for your time on the 1st meet and good bye.

 

[Stuffnu]

Yep withdraw the offer as its on her terms. I too, don’t do dinners this early In the game to rule out the leeches.
I‘m a social drinker, so if the girl doesn’t, you’re already incompatible.
Re-suggest a time and a place at a pub, pool hall, etc.
Her response or lack thereof will allow you to gauge her interest level.

 

[bat soup]

I agree 100% , i even thought about canceling with this one as i really hate if a girl uses me for a free dinner and i get nothing out of it ... the fact that she wont let me pick her up makes me think shes going ti eat sit anit then come up with a excuse to go home and it will be hard fir me to venue chnage to her house as we are both driving

You can't let women set the agenda. A restaurant is a terrible place to go with a girl. You've got a big wide table between you that stops you from escalating or even gauging her interest level and meanwhile she's scoffing down food and drink at your expense.

 

[CoandaEffect]

I

Agree , what are good cheap dates though? Like i cant think of much other then getting yougurt maybe walking around a park
I defult for drinks but when they go i dont drink or im havinf a break off alochcol i usually go with food because i dunno what else to do lol

A walk is great. I take them where there is an ice cream place and a bar nearby. If it goes well I suggest one of those two places afterwards.

Drink at a bar is fine. If she does not drink then suggest a coffee place.

Activities can be fun. Bowling, mini golf, museum. Check locally to see if there are any festivals nearby.

 

[2Rocky]

Stop by a deli and pick up a picnic dinner. Go for an evening stroll, and watch the full moon come up.

 

[devilkingx2]

2nd date , i offered to pick her up she said shes happy to drive and i mentioned drinks and she said she doesnt feel like drinking and dinner is good
So what are your thoughts?
I feel she wants to drive so she has more control, but im really not keen on a dinner date wasting money then she leaves after and i get nothing. She lives alone so i wanted to try and venue chnage to hers but the fact that she wont let me pick her up tells me shes doing it so its harder for me.to have sex with her etc

No drinking + no picking her up as a combo tells me that she's trying to avoid sex.

Optimistically it means that she knows you'll get laid if she has a few drinks and let's you go to her house.

Pessimistically it means that she's using some sort of manipulative strategy on you to achieve her goals (money? Attention? Free therapy? Getting you hooked on the chase?) without giving you what you want.

and getting no sex tbh
What you guys think ? If i feel shes just going to have food and leave ill tell her she can pay for the bill lol
I want to lead but shes making it hard. Do u thinking im thinking too much since its only thr 2nd date ? Or im right and shes not too keen maybe just wasting time with me till she finds somone she really wants because i know these hoes go clubs and fu#k randoms and shes making it hard for me after already meeting once and me buying dinner.
Yes i know i dont like doing dinner dates either but she doesnt wanna drink appernlty. As for the drinks we had after dinner she brought them so yeah
Thoughts??

Don't do the dinner on her terms unless you take her to a restaurant you really like with great food (Olive Garden, Red Lobster, etc.)

I'd go with the idea of offering to cook her dinner at your place. Or picking some other fun activity that's potentially cheaper than dinner (pool/billiards hall, batting cages, etc.)

 

[Willie Naylor]

One of my friends just sent me this. Maybe OP should try it...

 

[Robert28]

Sounds like you're overthinking it to me. I'd just do the date and see if the vibe is there.

I think sometimes we get so wrapped up in the tenets of RP that we become our own worst enemy.

Not really. You think she would not let Chad pick her up? You think she’d demand Chad take her to dinner? You think she wouldn’t feel like drinking with Chad? Bull on all 3.

 

[Willie Naylor]

Not really. You think she would not let Chad pick her up? You think she’d demand Chad take her to dinner? You think she wouldn’t feel like drinking with Chad? Bull on all 3.

Every girl isn't just down for sex 24/7.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Hb 8 , first date we met up had dinner then venue chnaged to bar i done some touching, had fun. At the end kissed her for abit she said she had ti go home.

2nd date , i offered to pick her up she said shes happy to drive and i mentioned drinks and she said she doesnt feel like drinking and dinner is good
So what are your thoughts?
I feel she wants to drive so she has more control, but im really not keen on a dinner date wasting money then she leaves after and i get nothing. She lives alone so i wanted to try and venue chnage to hers but the fact that she wont let me pick her up tells me shes doing it so its harder for me.to have sex with her etc

Me personally i hate wasting my money on girls and getting no sex tbh
What you guys think ? If i feel shes just going to have food and leave ill tell her she can pay for the bill lol
I want to lead but shes making it hard. Do u thinking im thinking too much since its only thr 2nd date ? Or im right and shes not too keen maybe just wasting time with me till she finds somone she really wants because i know these hoes go clubs and fu#k randoms and shes making it hard for me after already meeting once and me buying dinner.
Yes i know i dont like doing dinner dates either but she doesnt wanna drink appernlty. As for the drinks we had after dinner she brought them so yeah
Thoughts??

Please familiarize yourself with the articles and threads available on this forum about this. This is dating 101, my good fella. It has been talked about to death and should be 101 entry-level stuff.

Modern Man Advice

 

[Robert28]

Every girl isn't just down for sex 24/7.

They are with the right guy, not the average guy though. I’m not paying extra for what Chad got for free. Sorry.

 

[Willie Naylor]

They are with the right guy, not the average guy though. I’m not paying extra for what Chad got for free. Sorry.

Why are you apologizing to me?

 

[Bokanovsky]

It sounds like you have reservations about this woman. Your gut feeling is probably correct. Dinner wh0res are a dime a dozen these days. If she was really into you, she would not be making it difficult. She was okay with drinks last time but doesn't feel like drinking now? Did she convert to islam or enter a rehab in the intervening period? Makes no sense. I mean, she doesn't have to get wasted. She can just have a glass of wine.

Here's what I would do. I would text her and say that you don't feel like going for dinner. Don't even explain why; you don't owe her an explanation. Just say it in a very matter-of-fact kind of way. And then ask her if she has any other suggestions. If she does, great. If he doesn't, ditch her.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Since she doesn't mind driving and suggested dinner, offer to cook at your place as others have suggested.

Going forward, you want to have a second-date plan for these types of girls that doesn't involve going out to dinner or doing the same thing you did the first time. Mini-golf is a good idea, but it's getting cold for a lot of outside activities. You might have to get creative, but there are threads on here and on the net for second date ideas. See what's going on locally as well that doesn't cost a lot.

These kinds of girls though you ideally want to weed out by the end of the first date. What I like to do is do some isolating in the car (walk her back to her car, then ask her to drive you to yours which is parked a short distance away but not very close). If she allows you to kiss her but doesn't allow anything sensual or any fondling, then there's a good chance she's fronting. And even before the first date, you can see how she responds to sexual flirtation to better gauge her interest level.

edit - reread the OP and saw where he took her out to dinner on the first date. Bad idea, sends the wrong message and makes it hard to do a second date that surpasses the first. But the advice is the same - dinner at your place or cut bait.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Your mistake was dinner on date #1. Date #1 is always drinks or a walk in the park.

OP, you are the food guy. Eject.

 

[zinc4]

Hb 8 , first date we met up had dinner then venue chnaged to bar i done some touching, had fun. At the end kissed her for abit she said she had ti go home.

2nd date , i offered to pick her up she said shes happy to drive and i mentioned drinks and she said she doesnt feel like drinking and dinner is good
So what are your thoughts?
I feel she wants to drive so she has more control, but im really not keen on a dinner date wasting money then she leaves after and i get nothing. She lives alone so i wanted to try and venue chnage to hers but the fact that she wont let me pick her up tells me shes doing it so its harder for me.to have sex with her etc

Me personally i hate wasting my money on girls and getting no sex tbh
What you guys think ? If i feel shes just going to have food and leave ill tell her she can pay for the bill lol
I want to lead but shes making it hard. Do u thinking im thinking too much since its only thr 2nd date ? Or im right and shes not too keen maybe just wasting time with me till she finds somone she really wants because i know these hoes go clubs and fu#k randoms and shes making it hard for me after already meeting once and me buying dinner.
Yes i know i dont like doing dinner dates either but she doesnt wanna drink appernlty. As for the drinks we had after dinner she brought them so yeah
Thoughts??

Cancel on her and set up a real date. Her IL seems very low though if im being honest. I would cancel on her and see if she comes to you...if not then next.

 

[SW15]

Your mistake was dinner on date #1. Date #1 is always drinks or a walk in the park.

OP, you are the food guy. Eject.

Dinner dates in restaurants prior to sex is a common mistake. I am astounded men still do that given the info out on the internet about why not to do it. I stopped doing that in the early 2010s.

Date #1 is most often drinks. Some walk in a park, walking path, or other activity date is good too. Most of the time, it will be drinks because in your in-person approach or swiping/texting, you likely won't know a woman well enough to suggest a good activity date.

Additionally, women who don't drink any alcohol are a royal pain to deal with in the early stages of relationships since most early stage things involve alcohol.

@Rake101 -- the best you can do here is invite her to some sort of activity date and see what happens. It doesn't look good. The low interest level that @zinc4 mentions is a root cause. Dinner dates are a stiff and boring format that can lead to low IL even if a man is decent.

But the advice is the same - dinner at your place or cut bait.

He could offer that but he probably doesn't have good enough IL to get her to commit to that.