Calling Her Out

[BadBoy89]

Imagine a woman telling you one time she got drunk a had a threesome, and you telling her she's a wh0re, that's what incels do, instead of making an opportunity for you to have a threesome with her.

What does calling her a wh0re have to do with being an incel? A man can be Alpha and still call her a wh0re.

Make an opportunity to have sex with a woman who had sex with 2 guys at the same time? No thanks.

 

[jhonny9546]

Those men don't respect themselves, and women have all the power.

You won't have any LTR by being too hard as marble and rejecting everything: every relationship has had these problems and has them every day.

Tolerance: rather than being hard as marble, there is a kind of glass, and once it is full, you have to make her understand that it is, and that now is the time to stop doing bull****.
What do you think about this?

You don't want that type of relationship.

It seems easy: have you really had relationships with women so "peaceful"?
For us here in Italy it's all a dream. Impossible, here the girls have that pinch of craziness that they bring to the relationship. Even the calmest and heatlhiest I know, they've been together for 20 years, she has a bit of drama, and he jokes about it. But nothing like what you're saying.
Never seen a woman "peaceful and submissive" like a pet.

Have boundaries and enforce them when they are crossed by removing your attention, affection and/or commitment, depending on the severity. That's is the formula to have a great relationship

In Italy this is the formula to be seen as a "boring" or "pain in the ass" by everyone (at least here in Italy). He seems like a dictator.

But I get your point! But it seems to be too much like black and white. Is this considered a mature men behaviour?

Withdraw. Don't yell every time, don't get overemotional, just withdraw. Stop txting, stop calling, pretend they don't exist.

When you do this, they will tell you that you are "acting dumb", "you have become dumb" (emotional response).

@Giovanni SouthSide cold shoulder treatment (tell us more about this implementation in modern LTR's)

 

[jhonny9546]

Withdraw. Don't yell every time, don't get overemotional, just withdraw. Stop txting, stop calling, pretend they don't exist.

When you do this, they will tell you that you are "acting dumb", "you have become dumb" (emotional response).

@Giovanni SouthSide cold shoulder treatment (tell us more about this implementation in modern LTR's)

 

[New_Journey]

Alpha and still call her a wh0re.

Alphas don't need to, they know all women are w0res, you just have to be that man. Would shout from the rooftop the water wet? You fool.

Make an opportunity to have sex with a woman who had sex with 2 guys at the same time? No thanks.

What if she did with two girls? That's why you are an incel.

You won't have any LTR by being too hard as marble and rejecting everything: every relationship has had these problems and has them every day.

Tolerance: rather than being hard as marble, there is a kind of glass, and once it is full, you have to make her understand that it is, and that now is the time to stop doing bull****.
What do you think about this?

Why does it have to be black or white to you? When did I say reject everything? You need more reading comprehension instead of posting $hit that nobody wrote.

It seems easy: have you really had relationships with women so "peaceful"?
For us here in Italy it's all a dream. Impossible, here the girls have that pinch of craziness that they bring to the relationship. Even the calmest and heatlhiest I know, they've been together for 20 years, she has a bit of drama, and he jokes about it. But nothing like what you're saying.
Never seen a woman "peaceful and submissive" like a pet.

Again I never wrote any of this $hit.

But it seems to be too much like black and white. Is this considered a mature men behaviour?

I don't know and I don't care how its considered by whom, this is my formula that gives me respect to myself and from others, you crossed my boundaries?, okay next.

When you do this, they will tell you that you are "acting dumb", "you have become dumb" (emotional response).

Do you care that much what $tupid sound comes from her mouth? You should be in tuned with your emotions, if she does something to piss you off, are you gonna be all happy with her? No, you react by withdrawing and ignoring, its not a trick, its how men manage emotions, and women know they fvck up no matter what they say.

When you are happy, you laugh
When you are sad, you cry
When you are upset, you withdraw

 

[jhonny9546]

When you are upset, you withdraw

I see some men arguing, while others withdraw.
This suggests that it is not an innate men quality.
Does withdrawal stem from security or insecurity?

 

[Sega Genesis]

I see some men arguing, while others withdraw.
This suggests that it is not an innate men quality.
Does withdrawal stem from security or insecurity?

I think both arguing and withdrawing when YOU feel disrespected or wronged can be extremely destructive to a relationship whether casual, serious or something in between.

When YOU feel disrespected and I specify "you" as another man may not feel disrespected by the same behavior, there is no need to argue or harshly "lay down the law."

As humans beings, I'd like to think we have evolved since caveman days ffs.

Withdrawing (silence and distance) reflects lack of balls and fear/lack of a willingness to directly confront; it's what women do, it's passive-aggressive, and I'm a woman saying this! It's "feminine" behavior.

For me, I view it as weak and cowardly (a turn off and I say this sincerely) versus strong and masculine.

Strong and masculine is assertively (not aggressively or angrily) stating why YOU felt disrespected, what YOUR particular boundaries/expectations are, giving her a chance to apologize (assuming she feels the boundary is reasonable) and correct the behavior.

OR walk way gracefully if she feels your boundary/expectation is too much for her and doesn't align with HER values or standards.

All distancing does is exacerbate her insecurity and yes absolutely there are insecure women who will go chasing you when you withdraw! No question!

But it won't actually resolve anyyhing, she won't learn anything, it will just cause more fear and insecurity. It's actually quite manipulative.

Given that what one man considers disrespectful may not be considered disrespectful to another man, she may not realize her behavior was disrespectful to YOU, which is precisely why you need to communicate directly and assertively.

IF she becomes bytchy and defensive, it's then you should withdraw or better yet just dump her and find a better woman!

To requote what Atom Smasher (a highly respected former member here) said:

>>You need to judge every woman for her words and actions, and hold her responsible for both. I mean every single woman you come in contact with.
Let them see (know) that you are judging them. This is counterintuitive. Instead of repelling women, you will be attracting them.
There is a way to judge while still being friendly, open, and gentlemanly. Dealing with women successfully always involves doing the counterintuitive thing.<<

Wise words.

JMO

 

[Solomon]

As you get older you get less tolerant of rolling with misbehaving women, not only because there's more to life than just pvssy, but because maturing guys have lifestyles we kind of like and want to protect and dippy broads have a tendency to perpetually screw things up, and those screwups often get sucked into your mental health or life no matter how much you work to distance yourself from it.

It’s a fine line. If you start calling her out on every misdeed she does, she'll start to realize that is one way to get your attention or a reaction from you. From then on, she'll have control over you and you don't even realize it.

One of my hopes for future LTR’s is to be less reactive, and more selective to what I respond to. Every battle doesn't have to be fought; the goal is the win the war. Some sh!t can be deflected with an incredulous look, so my non-verbal cues are coming into play the more conscious I become of dialing back.

Not every confrontation has to be a knock-down, drag out fight. Setting up healthy boundaries is important in any relationship, but especially with women and particularly in LTR’s. A woman's sh!t-tests aren't signs you're not alpha enough, they're invitations to prove how alpha you are by how you choose to handle them.

Many times consistency is what gains her compliance in my experience. I had one girlfriend a few years back tell me that when they have started to verbalize or do something but then they “heard my voice” of disproval in their heads and they "self-checked" themselves.

One the hardest lessons I've learned regarding female nature is that misbehaving disrespectful women generally don't respond favorably to in-depth conversations or long talks that address their misbehavior. They respond to action. Not any kind of action but immediate and harsh action. The cold shoulder treatment should always be your second nature.

Withdraw. Don't yell every time, don't get overemotional, just withdraw. Stop txting, stop calling, pretend they don't exist.

When you show them no attention after they do something wrong it sends a clear mesage. This form of punishment is worse than anything else you can do. Women thrive on attention like we thrive with our moments of clarity.

Being able to walk away without any arguments or explanations is the only thing that will put a woman in her place. Appealing to a woman's reason never works, only your actions do.

Some really great posts in this thread however this post right here is a gem, and written by a true seducer. Everyone wants to be Pablo Escobar or El Chapo when it comes to dealing with women. However in the real world sometimes you gotta be Gus Fringe. Meaning You gotta choose your battles wisely. The older I get the more I walk away from situations that don't serve me this doesn't include just women, but also "Friendships" and even failed business relationships etc. I'm talking about walking away no threats, no yelling no screaming no fights. In my 20s and even up to my mid 30s I woulda been about that. However the last 5 years have been a very tough yet necessary) maturation process for me. We are all flawed invidiuals no one is perfect, especially women. Not excusing them but we all deal with our own flaws differently etc. You got people in their 40s/50s making decisions based on trauma they dealt with as a children and they don't even realize it. It's a real thing

A woman's sh!t-tests aren't signs you're not alpha enough, they're invitations to prove how they're invitations to prove how alpha you are by how you choose to handle the

^^This guy get's it

This thread is a great thread, great discussions