Did anyone here had success with women that expect a lot in the beginning?

[Baibars]

There are 2 types of women.
The first one shows some interest but not a lot, she expects fancy dates, expects you to pay and won’t come to your place.
I mean they initiate texts sometimes and when you meet them you get along but they’re not all over you.
That’s the type of women that is annoying and at some point when I don’t see her doing more for me I’m out.

Number 2 is the one that gives a lot in the beginning when she likes you. She will cook, clean your place, come wherever you want etc.
When you pay she will offer to pay.
That’s the kind of woman I want.

I’m just wondering who dates the 50% half ass women? Some of you are going to tell me that these women are super interested and crazy about a man too if it’s the right one but honestly I saw some of them with guys that are not better than me.
I assume these men just put up with their attitude for a long time, pay everything and run after them. Or maybe it’s me doing something wrong

 

[BPH]

Number 1 isn't interested in you, she's just interested in your resources, or sees you as a free meal - so she'll entertain you enough to get that out of you. You shouldn't even be going on dates with these women. It should be very obvious from the start whether there's mutual interest or whether she's going to make you jump through hoops. Somebody posted an article recently with quotes along the lines of "if a woman is interested, there is very little a man can do wrong on a date" followed by "if a woman is not interested, there is very little a man can do right".

Number 2 doesn't just "happen"...this is the kind of woman you get when you're not weird, treat her like a normal person, and lay it down in the bedroom. You should not expect this behavior out the gate from anyone ever, you should be the person worth that kind of treatment to her, first.

 

[The Duke]

Only a fool or an inexperienced man dates #1.

 

[Baibars]

Number 1 isn't interested in you, she's just interested in your resources, or sees you as a free meal - so she'll entertain you enough to get that out of you. You shouldn't even be going on dates with these women. It should be very obvious from the start whether there's mutual interest or whether she's going to make you jump through hoops. Somebody posted an article recently with quotes along the lines of "if a woman is interested, there is very little a man can do wrong on a date" followed by "if a woman is not interested, there is very little a man can do right".

Number 2 doesn't just "happen"...this is the kind of woman you get when you're not weird, treat her like a normal person, and lay it down in the bedroom. You should not expect this behavior out the gate from anyone ever, you should be the person worth that kind of treatment to her, first.

but it depends. There are women who think that almost everything you do and say is „weird“ while the ones that are genuinely interested think that everything you say is interesting.
That’s why I didn’t try to change myself so others think I’m not weird. I guess some people will always think you’re weird

 

[Baibars]

Number 1 isn't interested in you, she's just interested in your resources, or sees you as a free meal - so she'll entertain you enough to get that out of you. You shouldn't even be going on dates with these women. It should be very obvious from the start whether there's mutual interest or whether she's going to make you jump through hoops. Somebody posted an article recently with quotes along the lines of "if a woman is interested, there is very little a man can do wrong on a date" followed by "if a woman is not interested, there is very little a man can do right".

Number 2 doesn't just "happen"...this is the kind of woman you get when you're not weird, treat her like a normal person, and lay it down in the bedroom. You should not expect this behavior out the gate from anyone ever, you should be the person worth that kind of treatment to her, first.

And why do these women show interest and leave the door open? I mean there are a lot of women that are not interested at all.

 

[BPH]

but it depends. There are women who think that almost everything you do and say is „weird“ while the ones that are genuinely interested think that everything you say is interesting.
That’s why I didn’t try to change myself so others think I’m not weird. I guess some people will always think you’re weird

Well first of all, are you weird?

I've been with enough women to know that most guys are weird; multiple texts without reply, showing up uninvited, buying overly expensive gifts, thinking unresponsiveness means she's cheating, etc.

First, you need to evaluate whether the problem is THEM, or YOU. If more women are receptive to you than not - regardless of whether you're being rejected - then you're probably fine. But if you're running into this problem a LOT, then maybe you need some self-reflection.

And why do these women show interest and leave the door open? I mean there are a lot of women that are not interested at all.

I don't understand your question here. Are you asking why women like Number 1 show initial interest? Or are you asking why Number 2 shows the level of interest I mentioned?

 

[Baibars]

Well first of all, are you weird?

I've been with enough women to know that most guys are weird; multiple texts without reply, showing up uninvited, buying overly expensive gifts, thinking unresponsiveness means she's cheating, etc.

First, you need to evaluate whether the problem is THEM, or YOU. If more women are receptive to you than not - regardless of whether you're being rejected - then you're probably fine. But if you're running into this problem a LOT, then maybe you need some self-reflection.



I don't understand your question here. Are you asking why women like Number 1 show initial interest? Or are you asking why Number 2 shows the level of interest I mentioned?

No, im not weird if you mean chasing women when they are not interested at all by that.

Yes. I am asking why number 1 shows interest.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

If a woman isn't interested from the start she will never be more interested. Men who think this just get played and manipulated while the woman runs circles around them and dangle carrots to get them to do "chores" with the promise of sex only for them to eventually stop having sex completely while the wife goes around and fvcks dudes on the side.

 

[BPH]

No, im not weird if you mean chasing women when they are not interested at all by that.

That's not the only metric. My point is to make sure you're not doing things that could be offputting.

Yes. I am asking why number 1 shows interest.

Usually, they don't, and it's just the guy being hopeful because she hasn't hit him with a hard rejection - so he thinks there's a chance.

Other times she IS interested but wants to see what she can get away with. I actually have a perfect example:

I matched with this hot chick off of Tinder recently. The conversation started out pretty good; flirty, talking about breakfast in bed, asking what I'd want to eat in the morning, said "You", she told me "That comes with a price" which I thought could be a red flag meaning she needs me to take her out somewhere nice first, or that she's a straight up prostitute. I asked what the cost would be, she asked what I had to offer, I said something along the lines of "my charming company" and told her to send me her number so we could find out how much that was worth to her.

Here's where she lost me: her reply was "I don't just give that out, you have to earn it". Some guys might play along with that, but coupled with the "comes with a price" comment I'm thinking she wants to see how much effort I'd put in. I replied "lol never mind, this is off to a bad start" and she unmatched me at some point afterward.

Women that say they're "worth it", whatever IT is, never are.

 

[Bingo-Player]

The thing with women is they're like chameleons they can alternate demeanours very quickly depending on how they value the men their interacting with and what type of mood their in

thats why its important not too take them too seriously , invest anything into them too quickly or divulge too much information too quickly

Men far too often approach a woman they find merely attractive with the attitude of "shes the one"

Women are used to this and depending on how they perceive your value will react accordingly so they could end up being Number 1 or number 2

The key isn't to categorise her but instead not allow her to categorise you !

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

There are 2 types of women.

You lost me right there. From where I stand there are a lot more than two types of women.

 

[Vanderdonck]

I think type #1 is the kind of woman we at SS advise men to avoid.

 

[BeExcellent]

The Dutchman is correct on this point gentlemen.

For example I want to see, particularly if I fancy a man, some investment. Of time, effort and yes money. If he shows me that investment I reward it. Very simple. I'm never demanding, very playful and coy but in a warm, charming way. I want to figure out who (among the men who show initial interest in me) is worth my time. You see my time is the most valuable thing I have, and I'm not going to waste it on a man I'm not interested in.

Any woman worth her salt will behave similarly.

Men like the hunt. Men like to feel they've won or earned something of value. Where's the fun of your prey laying down for you? You'll think its great....right up to the time a woman comes along and requires that you invest. And you'll dump the easy girl more often than not for the one you really want - the one who requires effort and investment.

Its a human nature thing. We value what we invest in. So if she isn't requiring you to invest? She's selling herself short and in time that will bite her in the ass.

 

[DJ Novice]

All romantic relationships are transactional. As PsycHacks puts it, romantic relationships are the medium in which value is exchanged.

Unconditional love only exists between parents and their children.

People go into romantic relationships looking for their needs to be met and if they aren’t the relationship will end.

It’s ok to love a woman but never fall in love with a woman. Practice non attachment.

The sooner you understand this the happier you will be.

 

[Divorced w 3]

The Dutchman is correct on this point gentlemen.

For example I want to see, particularly if I fancy a man, some investment. Of time, effort and yes money. If he shows me that investment I reward it. Very simple. I'm never demanding, very playful and coy but in a warm, charming way. I want to figure out who (among the men who show initial interest in me) is worth my time. You see my time is the most valuable thing I have, and I'm not going to waste it on a man I'm not interested in.

Any woman worth her salt will behave similarly.

Men like the hunt. Men like to feel they've won or earned something of value. Where's the fun of your prey laying down for you? You'll think its great....right up to the time a woman comes along and requires that you invest. And you'll dump the easy girl more often than not for the one you really want - the one who requires effort and investment.

Its a human nature thing. We value what we invest in. So if she isn't requiring you to invest? She's selling herself short and in time that will bite her in the ass.

Well said. This is why push-pull is the single most impotent dynamic in attraction.