How to deal with men?

[Clockwerk50]

Probably in some specific occasion I'm the one exaggerating the situation. But for example, whe I first met the instructor of the gym, I just tried to be gentle and friendly.
He started waving his hands in my face, leading me around the gym and pointing his finger at the floor or ceiling in an attempt to get me to look in those directions. He was trying to show off and show how he dominated the newcomer. As soon as I defended myself, in a calm and relaxed way by pointing with my finger, and making him fall into the trap, he was triggered. From that day on, every time I talk to him he seems to get very agitated, he acts tough towards everyone, the strong man. He then started insulting me in an indirect way, hurling insults at me under his breath when I passed by him. Now, I'm labeled as the weird one, and the other idiots who follow him, play this game that when I pass, they crowd away from me and don't have to talk to me. Several times guys said "don't talk to him".
On the contrary, the women at the gym are attracted to me, they want to talk to me and appreciate what I say and think. This is the reality I have lived in for many years. Aggressive men and women attracted to me

It could be either of these perspectives:

• You are highly confrontational and often seek conflict where none exists.
• You may be overly sensitive, turning minor issues into major ones.
• You seem to assume that others want to dominate you, when in reality, it may be you who seeks to dominate them.
• Your are very feminine and it helps you connect with women, but it appears that some men struggle to relate to you.
• You exhibit an expectation of entitlement, believing you deserve certain treatment. When you don’t receive it, you might feel that others are against you.
• You have a problem with authority.

As another commenter mentioned, there may be underlying issues with your perspective or behaviour if so many men find it difficult to be friends with you.

 

[Lean Baby Face]

Why are you even talking about men to this extent? Learn from experience and observations and build some ego to fight back these losers and talk down to them in return and shatter their frail wannabe pseudo-masculine selves. We're now living in the mid-2020s, everyone's direct and impolite and unforgiving, yet more entitled than ever for some reason.

Also, you mentioned you got a lot of female "friends", why not trying getting a little closer to one of them and perhaps getting out of that friend zone now that you already know them? Seems like you got a lot of opportunities waiting for you but choose to spend your energy in other places instead.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

OP you're from Rome right? Move out of Italy. If you have aloof tendencies, Italian dudes (at least in the US) hate aloof guys. They're extremely social, and frustrated from having to deal with their difficult women. You're not like them, and they are looking to vent at whatever. Plus, add in authoritative tendencies derived from headquartering the Catholic Church, and you have a toxic brew.

Not much good about Italy, people-wise.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Billy,
Like them or lump them,Italian Women I have met,are all good cooks.

 

[BeExcellent]

Lets see OP. I am a woman here, the guys know me as "the old lady". Let me ask a few questions to help the board to help you. Please answer honestly for otherwise we cannot know the situation better. The questions below will help.

1. What country are you in (Italy?)
2. How good looking are you (model/handsome/decent/looks are not your calling card)?
3. How old are you?
4. What kind of fitness (soccer athlete/body builder/skinny/runner/some overweight/very overweight)?
5. How do you feel at parties (sociable/comfortable/anxious/I don't do parties)?
6. If you are talking to another man's girlfriend or wife, how does the woman's partner react (he doesn't care/he is curious but cool/he is jealous/he is angry at you and/or his girl)?

The answers to those questions will help us help you.

Finally one last observation & question: If a man gives you a compliment you seem to react/respond inappropriately. When someone, especially a stranger, gives you a compliment, they have made an effort to notice something they LIKE about you. That is NOT an attack. But you seem to react aggressively or rudely, which is an inappropriate response. Your inappropriate response is rude and weird to the person who just complimented you.

Listen carefully. My husband used to react to compliments rudely and weirdly. Strangers talking to him made him feel weird and judged. He is on the autism spectrum and unsolicited interactions with strangers, mainly men, make him feel uncomfortable. I explained to him that people are being nice, but he is being inappropriate. I said to him, just nod, smile, tip your hat or say "Thank you". Those are socially appropriate responses. He started responding as I suggested and people no longer saw him as rude or weird or arrogant in those situations. Perhaps you might try a thank you or other acknowledgement?

My husband is a semi pro athlete, and is very good looking. Men assume he is arrogant (because of his looks) rather than socially awkward. Like you he prefers the company of women, and has more female friends than male friends. Fortunately I am not a jealous woman, lol.

Does any of this resonate with you?

 

[Divorced w 3]

OP you're from Rome right? Move out of Italy. If you have aloof tendencies, Italian dudes (at least in the US) hate aloof guys. They're extremely social, and frustrated from having to deal with their difficult women. You're not like them, and they are looking to vent at whatever. Plus, add in authoritative tendencies derived from headquartering the Catholic Church, and you have a toxic brew.

Not much good about Italy, people-wise.

Italian women, American and abroad, are feisty bitches but they’re fbcking hot and I absolutely love them.

They’re also extremely family oriented, loyal, submissive and great in bed. Those qualities above are how they weed out beta males. My ex wife was Italian. She’s an a$$hole but she was my a$$hole. I had a partner for life if I wanted but was just insane unfortunately and kids brought her to a level that was insurmountable