Harsh Truth: Women pursue the men that they want

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
6,586
Reaction score
5,699
I don't see how this truth is 'harsh'. Women have always be the choosers, while letting men think they're the one who chooses. :cool:

I only find young women playfully putting up some resistance, but most women tend to be compliant and easy going with the right vibe. If they play hard to get, just let them off the leash. Women are like kittens in that way, you don't chase them, you lure them.
 

Mertz09

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2024
Messages
227
Reaction score
145
Location
Houston Tx.
My bad, Bro. Thought you were trying to get under her skin or something
No not at all trying to get under her skin. Just agreeing with what she wrote and interestingly enough I read something very similar just last year on another forum.
 
M

member162951

Guest
She may not "chase" you, but what she will do is make it easy for you. She will say yes when you ask her out, she will demonstrate interest & investment, she will be fun to be around. That isn't chasing but it is still (+) responsiveness.

That is how the higher quality gals do things. Respond and be receptive & positive & willing to commit time & effort (and yes perhaps some money too).
I think this notion of how "high quality" women do things is outdated. Or how "feminine" women behave or even what constitutes a feminine woman.

I also don't like this notion of "chasing" because chasing someone (man or woman) suggests the person is running away, and I am sorry but NO ONE should be chasing anyone when they're running away.

"Initiate" or "pursue" is a better way of putting it, and franky I know plenty of extremely high quality, very feminine women who initiate and do so in a very girlish and feminine way; there is nothing masculine about her OR that she took the initiative.

In fact, it reflects confidence and high self-worth. It all depends on how she asks, her tone, her mannerisms, her look, her style.

On the other hand, I know women who wouldn't initiate if their lives depended on it, and they are loud, abrasive, their tone, their mannerisms, their look and style "masculine."

It's not so black and white anymore fellas, where "men pursue and women respond." It's nuanced and again depends on many factors.

@BeExcellent you post some great stuff, but a lot of what you post about "quality" women and this is how "feminine" behave is pure projection.

It's how YOU do things and that's fine, but please don't speak for all women, as I said I know LOTS of extremely high quality feminine women who have no problem suggesting coffee to a man she's attracted to, and the men I associate with LOVE it.

Assuming they are interested in and attracted to her too, that's key.

And to a "high quality" women, if he hems and haws or makes excuses or flakes, it's a NEXT.

No passively 'waiting around' for HIM to make a move, and whoever created this notion that it's what "high quality" women do can *** . It's 2024 for heavens sake.

Imo and experience when two people are attracted to each other, it doesn't make a hill of beans difference who texts who first, who asks who out, etc. Again, it's NOT the asking, but HOW she asks - her voice, her tone, her mannerisms, how she carries herself, her overall look and style.

I have read posts from you stating that you take absolutely NO initiative for like the first three or so MONTHS in order for him to "prove his interest." You've posted that, I can find it if you don't recall posting it.

What a bunch of horseshyt no offense. Any man who would go for that in this day and age needs to have his head examined.

Dating in today's dating environment is a mutual endeavor, where both people are putting forth effort, in different ways, at different times. Sometimes she initiates, sometimes he initiates. From the beginning.

Other than that, love your stuff.... :D

$.02.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Mertz09

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2024
Messages
227
Reaction score
145
Location
Houston Tx.
I think this notion of how "high quality" women do things is outdated. Or how "feminine" women behave or even what constitutes a feminine woman.

I also don't like this notion of "chasing" because chasing someone (man or woman) suggests the person is running away, and I am sorry but NO ONE should be chasing anyone when they're running away.

"Initiate" or "pursue" is a better way of putting it, and franky I know plenty of extremely high quality, very feminine women who initiate and do so in a very girlish and feminine way; there is nothing masculine about her OR that she took the initiative.

In fact, it reflects confidence and high self-worth. It all depends on how she asks, her mannerisms, her look, her style.

On the other hand, I know women who wouldn't initiate if their lives depended on it, and they are loud, abrasive, their mannerisms, their look and style "masculine."

It's not so black and white anymore fellas, where "men pursue and women respond." It's nuanced and again depends on many factors.

@BeExcellent you post some great stuff, but a lot of what you post about "quality" women and this is how "feminine" behave is pure projection.

It's how YOU do things and that's fine, but please don't speak for all women, as I said I know LOTS of extremely high quality feminine women who have no problem suggesting coffee to a man she's attracted to, and the men I associate with LOVE it.

Assuming they are interested in and attracted to her too, that's key.

And to a "high quality" women, if he hems and haws or makes excuses or flakes, it's a NEXT.

No passively 'waiting around' for HIM to make a move, and whoever created this notion that it's what "high quality" women do can * . It's 2024 for heavens sake.

Imo and experience when two people are attracted to each other, it doesn't make a hill of beans difference who texts first, who asks who out first, etc. Again, it's NOT the asking, but HOW she asks - her voice, her tone, her mannerisms, how she carries herself, her overall look and style.

I have read posts from you stating that you take absolutely NO initiative for like the first three or so MONTHS in order for him to "prove his interest." You've posted that, I can find it if you don't recall posting it.

What a bunch of horseshyt no offense. Any man who would go for that in this day and age needs to have his head examined.

Dating in today's dating environment is a mutual endeavor, where both people are putting forth effort, in different ways, at different times. Sometimes she initiates, sometimes he initiates. From the beginning.

Other than that, love your stuff.... :D

$.02.
" It's not so black and white anymore fellas, where "men pursue and women respond." It's nuanced and again depends on many factors."
It's complicated people!

"
"Dating in today's dating environment is a mutual endeavor, where both people are putting forth effort, in different ways, at different times. Sometimes she initiates, sometimes he initiates. From the beginning."

DITO
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,723
Reaction score
6,707
Age
55
Hmmm. I hope you are having an Ok day @JoyDivision1990.

Its not just how I do things. Its how many women who are happily coupled do things, including my future daughter-in-law (she's 20, feminine & demure-they marry in June), my best girlfriend (getting married in May), another gorgeous girlfriend of mine (getting married in July) and other women who I know personally who are in solid relationships.

It's not a stance all women take; I cannot speak for all women of course, but it is not a bygone concept, particularly among more conservative cultures & slices of society.

Even Guru, who I chat with once in a great while, has found this to be applicable.

If something else works for you, awesome. But taking the man's role and initiating is the better way to roll, IMHO.
 
M

member162951

Guest
I am having a fine day @BeExcellent thanks for asking. :)

I simply dislike such antiquated gender roles and from experience believe they are outdated, for reasons stated.

I understand they work for you however frankly I'm having trouble grasping how you can justify not taking any initiative for 3-4 months, in order for a man to "prove his interest" and not have that come off as entitlement and some sort of shyt test.

Not to mention insecure. I mean imo a beautiful, secure, confident "high quality" woman should know how interested a man is by virtue of how they vibe together, their sexual attraction/chemistry, and how connected they are on their dates.

She shouldn't need him to "prove" his interest or anything else imo. But yet apparently you do, or did?

Anyway, surely I must be missing something because this makes zero sense to me, especially coming from you, so will just leave it there. If it works for you and the men you date/dated, fabulous.

Again, JMO, to each their own.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Mertz09

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2024
Messages
227
Reaction score
145
Location
Houston Tx.
I Luv that you 2 Women express your opinion's on this forum. We should All listen to them! That doesn't mean we to agree...but it is refreshening.
 

Dr.Suave

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
3,823
Reaction score
4,140
I Luv that you 2 Women express your opinion's on this forum. We should All listen to them! That doesn't mean we to agree...but it is refreshening.
@JoyDivision1990 Is a girl??? Honestly that's the first time Im hearing this.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,050
Reaction score
8,891
Mostly true. But. You leave out timing. Mixed signals can indicate she has some interest but other things interfere. A girl I thought was merely an acquaintance one day gave me a hug and whispered in my ear; ‘I don’t have a boyfriend anymore.’. Another case: I asked a coworker out. She gave me a soft rejection. 3 months later I asked her out again. She said ‘yes.’
Reminds me of a situation where I approached this hot young redhead back when I was a young man. I have a thing for redheads. I had a friend with me, as did she. I forget the exact details, but I remember it coming out that she'd prefer my friend. So I was like screw this, and we left. My friend at the time didn't care, he was afraid to talk to girls. Several days later we saw them again, and the girl was trying to apologize to me and was trying to get back into my good graces. But I gave her the cold shoulder, she had missed her window.

Looking back now, I could have swallowed my pride, and we could have had a good time. Or maybe we could have switched off in the first place, I don't remember her friend at all now, just that I liked the redhead. But she p!ssed me off, so she had her chance.
 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,687
Reaction score
3,145
Location
California
Reminds me of a situation where I approached this hot young redhead back when I was a young man. I have a thing for redheads. I had a friend with me, as did she. I forget the exact details, but I remember it coming out that she'd prefer my friend. So I was like screw this, and we left. My friend at the time didn't care, he was afraid to talk to girls. Several days later we saw them again, and the girl was trying to apologize to me and was trying to get back into my good graces. But I gave her the cold shoulder, she had missed her window.

Looking back now, I could have swallowed my pride, and we could have had a good time. Or maybe we could have switched off in the first place, I don't remember her friend at all now, just that I liked the redhead. But she p!ssed me off, so she had her chance.
I was never a fan of redheads. Until I banged one. Literally the best pvssy I ever felt. Now. I love redheads.
 

Pierce Manhammer

Moderator
Joined
Jun 2, 2021
Messages
5,028
Reaction score
6,032
Location
PRC
Without failure the best cooch for me has always been on a fitness obsessed chick, regardless of age. I’m convinced my current front runner has the tightest snatch in the universe. Like difficulty consummating the first time and road rash for a week or two at the beginning.

But yea real firecrotch and natural blonde poonanie has always been amazing for me. Given I only go for gymbods there could be a correlation.
 

manfrombelow

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
1,738
Reaction score
2,228
Age
35
Reminds me of a situation where I approached this hot young redhead back when I was a young man. I have a thing for redheads. I had a friend with me, as did she. I forget the exact details, but I remember it coming out that she'd prefer my friend. So I was like screw this, and we left. My friend at the time didn't care, he was afraid to talk to girls. Several days later we saw them again, and the girl was trying to apologize to me and was trying to get back into my good graces. But I gave her the cold shoulder, she had missed her window.

Looking back now, I could have swallowed my pride, and we could have had a good time. Or maybe we could have switched off in the first place, I don't remember her friend at all now, just that I liked the redhead. But she p!ssed me off, so she had her chance.
If I'm really really really into that pvssy, I'd swallow my pride. But if my Interest Level in her is just mediocre or slightly above mediocre, I would pass. So it all boils down to how much you really want that pvssy.

Literally a month ago, this chick who was into me enough to French kiss me and discussed sex with me on our 1st date pulled the Last Minute Resistance as we both stood in front of this hotel. When it was clearly she was not willing to comply, I drove her home, and even until today she still tried to initiate small talks and chit-chat and stuff, my IL in her dropped to way below zero to want to invest even another minute with her again.

Problem is: She was immature, annoying as fvck, and she had her chance of having a good time with me but she blew it off, so she won't have another chance. Another problem: My Interest Level in her at peak was only somewhere above 55-60%.
 

manfrombelow

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
1,738
Reaction score
2,228
Age
35
Without failure the best cooch for me has always been on a fitness obsessed chick, regardless of age. I’m convinced my current front runner has the tightest snatch in the universe. Like difficulty consummating the first time and road rash for a week or two at the beginning.
You forgot to mention especially if this "fitness obsessed chick" used to be an overweight obese fugly that nobody wanted so it drove her to the point she had to do something with her weight and body to take revenge of all of that sh!t. Trust me, I've met plenty of them girls, they all had the same formula: From obese -> fitness obsessed and 100% of them (no exception) bring the best pvssy to bed, and 100% of them (no exception) are c0ck and sex addicted junkies sluts. One of them even told me she had to finger herself every morning otherwise she "could not go through the day".

They're good to fvck, but LTR? No fvcking way. Damaged c0ck-addicts are not suitable for that.
 

Pierce Manhammer

Moderator
Joined
Jun 2, 2021
Messages
5,028
Reaction score
6,032
Location
PRC
Well I’m not aware of any of my prey having been obese - you can usually tell with stretch marks. I’m happy, and the one I mentioned has always been a gym bunny, and fitness instructor from early on. Works for me brah.

ymmv
 

manfrombelow

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
1,738
Reaction score
2,228
Age
35
Well I’m not aware of any of my prey having been obese - you can usually tell with stretch marks. I’m happy, and the one I mentioned has always been a gym bunny, and fitness instructor from early on. Works for me brah.

ymmv
They all told me, even showd me their old photos as evidence, how obese, over-weight and fugly they were before they began hitting the gym like crazy and started fvcking left and right to take revenge for all those years of lusting after sex to no avail and feeling unwanted and invisible to most guys.
 

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
11,295
Reaction score
4,664
I think a good strategy is to get the digits - which I always test out right there to see that her phone rings :rolleyes: - and then wait a bit to see if she can't take waiting for you to get back to her, and she contacts you first.
 

itouchyou

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2023
Messages
284
Reaction score
185
If I'm really really really into that pvssy, I'd swallow my pride. But if my Interest Level in her is just mediocre or slightly above mediocre, I would pass. So it all boils down to how much you really want that pvssy.

Literally a month ago, this chick who was into me enough to French kiss me and discussed sex with me on our 1st date pulled the Last Minute Resistance as we both stood in front of this hotel. When it was clearly she was not willing to comply, I drove her home, and even until today she still tried to initiate small talks and chit-chat and stuff, my IL in her dropped to way below zero to want to invest even another minute with her again.

Problem is: She was immature, annoying as fvck, and she had her chance of having a good time with me but she blew it off, so she won't have another chance. Another problem: My Interest Level in her at peak was only somewhere above 55-60%.
It's surprising to me that men will next a woman just for not having sex on the first night. Biologically speaking, women aren't hardwired to do that.. they like to see investment, comfort, etc. I've never been one to push and even if I did, I wouldn't be upset if they didn't go for it. That type of behavior is basically expecting a woman to be a slut, aka using sex as a tool to gain commitment. In my opinion if you got her that heated up and she still said no, that's a sign of a good woman (or a sign that she's not attracted enough to you, which I doubt, since you made out). I don't know how attractive this woman was but generally speaking the really attractive ones don't need to have sex on the first night because they can gain commitment from top men without doing that. That's a more attractive mindset to me because it means attraction can be genuinely built without the need for "game/gimmicks" and it can't be faked to get a one night stand.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
14,565
Reaction score
15,682
When a woman wants you, she'd crawl under 1000km of barbwire and navigate through a minefield bigger than the one in Avdiivka, Ukraine to be with you and svck your d!ck right at your front door.

Timing my fvcking azz. Only her actions in the moment matter. The rest is only dogsh!t.
This is extremely naive and what happens when you spend too much time reading theory online instead of being in the real world.

Timing, more than anything, is what matters.

If a woman is happy with her boyfriend it doesn't matter how great your seduction skills are or how good looking you are, she won't be available to you. She will not entertain that notion and will shut you down because in her mind she is "taken".

The same woman who dumped her boyfriend that week and met you might have happily given you her number and went out with you.

Same woman, two different mindsets that she is in, one of them is conducive to you fvcking her and the other one might as well have a 20 foot wall surrounding her because you aren't getting in.

Of course there are exceptions that will fvck anything that moves if they are interested in them regardless of their relationship status or happiness but that is rare...
 
Last edited:

H8CourtshipWithAPassion

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2024
Messages
259
Reaction score
84
Age
32
while i do believe it does happen, as said in this forum, its still not normally the case, women normally don't pursue men in the sense that they are normally never the ones to make advances on a guy they like
 
Top