Struggling To Get Over My Break Up!

Gamisch

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It's hard when so much worked well in a relationship - yet a deal breaker didn't.

I've had this occur to varying degrees a few times in life.

It's even worse when you're crazily attracted to them.

About 3 months ago, I let go of a girl 10 years my junior that could pass for 35, just a real beauty - but I had to - I was tired of some of her behaviors, and I'd broken up with her like 5-6 times in the intervening years - this time I made it ugly enough she'll never come back. And that's exactly what I wanted. She would ask to see me to break up in person, she'd come over and the best sex we'd had since the previous breakup would ensue, and I'd get sucked back in.

I let it happen. But no more - she still is texting here and there with some lame excuse to start chatting me up.

Just let go OP.
Thanks for writing this.

I'm going through something similar, and despite my belief that THIS time she must've felt so disrespected, she always finds a way back. Yes, I'm a BYTCH from that regard. I can't sugarcoat it...

As you said in the thread about empathy, women are actually tough as nails ,and "bad treatment " won't necessarily have the effect that we think it will have..if anything ,the bad treatment might be the reason why in my case she keeps coming back.

I had to go to a really, really dark place to make it clear to her that its OVER. That she's a *****, a slvt, unworthy and a lost case and we will NEVER be together.

Thats when the healing starts. Its like a amputation, it hurts like feck but you KNOW the pain will disappear if you give it time.

OP keeps taking lines of this mental cocaine and my suspicion is that he is just as guilty as she is. Even better, he is 100% guilty. Because he is the orchestrator of his own life and allows this to happen.

Again, honesty is tge first step. Who gives a feck that savy member who claims he is a 10 percenters laughs at you? Its a anonymous forum, one day you'll stop posting and new members will take over anyway. Make use of the fact you're surrounded by men who "specialize" in figuring out these broads and LEARN!!! Instead of maintaining a fake image up until the point that you actually believe in your own lies.

I have more respect for a member who says he sexless amd struggles with women than a member who claims to be a don Juan while he's NOT.
 

Gamisch

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You already know that she will come back again. I've told you this in literally every thread you made about her: she is (in your perception) out of your league thus you are scared she is the last best thing you will ever get.
This dynamic will NEVER EVER change bro..
She will ALWAYS make you feel insecure and that's why the same thing happens again and again . One of you guys has to make a DRAMATIC change of character, amd that is unlikely to happen. Especially from her side...so hypothetically this can ONLY work if you suddenly become a different person, one who treats her like she's worth nothing..nope wont work.

The only thing you can do is walk away. But let me tell you what's going on; you are desperately swiping right on everything with a hole in it but you dont get the results you want(quick fixes) , thus you'll be THANKING Jesus by the time Lithuanian/Russian girl hits you up again.

You are orchestrating your own downfall, and its sad ro see you're unable to break this pattern. Don't get mad at me, we were "friends" again and you should know now that I am a straight shooter. I aint sugarcoating shyte. And if you're smart you FINALLY listen to me for once and cut her off COMPLETELY. Especially MENTALLY!!!
 

Gamisch

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All they did was fvcking, no travel or anything like thag to be a memorable relationship with a lot of fun, pictures, videos, crazy adventures of the two.

5 weeks without contact, no social media, no text, no calls or any connection towards her is plenty for the brain to calibrate the lack of oxytocin.

They say for every 4 months of relationship, 1 month of doing the work is required to get over an ex. He should be almost getting over her, not with this thinking like if it were the first week. Unless he's stalking her on SM, or he broke it with her as a convert contract thinking that she will be back, since she didn't do he feels like that.

You don't brake up with a girl for her to come back, that's a covert contract, you break up and you never look back cause there were deal breakers.
Your calculation is off and that ain't your fault, it's because the input /information you're working with is wrong.

Op made numerous threads about this woman, so he's involved with her for at least 14 months now. It also wasn't "just sex" as OP tried to lock her down as wifey constantly. She disrespected him in ways you can't even make up. Yet he keeps chasing her.

Thats the truth.
 

Luni

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Your calculation is off and that ain't your fault, it's because the input /information you're working with is wrong.

Op made numerous threads about this woman, so he's involved with her for at least 14 months now. It also wasn't "just sex" as OP tried to lock her down as wifey constantly. She disrespected him in ways you can't even make up. Yet he keeps chasing her.

Thats the truth.
thanks for the context. bit disappointed i complimented his resolve without knowing the story.
 

soulforge

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This dynamic will NEVER EVER change bro..
She will ALWAYS make you feel insecure and that's why the same thing happens again and again . One of you guys has to make a DRAMATIC change of character, amd that is unlikely to happen. Especially from her side...so hypothetically this can ONLY work if you suddenly become a different person, one who treats her like she's worth nothing..nope wont work.

The only thing you can do is walk away. But let me tell you what's going on; you are desperately swiping right on everything with a hole in it but you dont get the results you want(quick fixes) , thus you'll be THANKING Jesus by the time Lithuanian/Russian girl hits you up again.

You are orchestrating your own downfall, and its sad ro see you're unable to break this pattern. Don't get mad at me, we were "friends" again and you should know now that I am a straight shooter. I aint sugarcoating shyte. And if you're smart you FINALLY listen to me for once and cut her off COMPLETELY. Especially MENTALLY!!!
I actually already told told Murk that it was the same girl lol a while ago.

And she is Russian Luthuainin mix it's not two different girls. Yes initially when I made a post about her, I didn't want to admit that I let her back into my life after she claim pleading.

But to be straight up honest, me and her never broke up time and time again. This is the first major break up. Prior to that it was once me walking away and her pleading to get back with me within a few days.

And I still stand my ground on this, I ain't ever letting her back in again.

And it's TRUE most of guys end up in a toxic situation mostly due to a scarcity mindset.

I totally understand that, that's why most guys get dumped or broken up with.

Yes it took me giving her up 3 opportunities to fix up, she didn't... So I walked away.

I'm out of the situation now and I intend to keep things that way. Chicks like that are addictive, so healing might take a little time, but it will happen soon enough.
 

soulforge

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thanks for the context. bit disappointed i complimented his resolve without knowing the story.

She disrespected me one time and one time only.. When she told me that Shvt the fuk up. So what's this nonsense about disrespected me time and time again.

It happened one time in the 9 months I was seeing her, and I walked.

Other than that the only issue was her masculine combative attitude, which I cannot fix because that's who she is. So I walked
 

johnrambo

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About 3 months ago, I let go of a girl 10 years my junior that could pass for 35, just a real beauty - but I had to - I was tired of some of her behaviors, and I'd broken up with her like 5-6 times in the intervening years - this time I made it ugly enough she'll never come back. And that's exactly what I wanted. She would ask to see me to break up in person, she'd come over and the best sex we'd had since the previous breakup would ensue, and I'd get sucked back in.
Bravo to you! How old is this woman if she can pass as 35? Just curious.
 

Luni

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She disrespected me one time and one time only.. When she told me that Shvt the fuk up. So what's this nonsense about disrespected me time and time again.

It happened one time in the 9 months I was seeing her, and I walked.

Other than that the only issue was her masculine combative attitude, which I cannot fix because that's who she is. So I walked
still proud of you regardless
 

soulforge

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In what context she did that? Like playing and you took offense? Also, you have to do major reflection and see where you went wrong.

Women typically start mirroring your behavior, if she's being $hitty to you she's just reflecting your $hit towards you (lack of masculinity).

Typically in the early stages you were acting all masculine, with little investment towards her, then as time went on you changed into a pushover, so she starts acting how she views you. That has happened to us all.
To be honest bruv I literally never let her get away with crap. Always checked her if she over stepped the line on anything.

I was never afraid to check her and she totally understood that.

Some chicks just have a bad attitude and have underlying issues. She was combative with other people too.

She would tell me about people she had a kick off with at work, people who annoyed her and she lashes out at them.

Some people just wired that way lol
 

Dr.Suave

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@soulforge I love you bro, but its time to put on your big boy pants and never go back to an ex. Dont make me come to your location and b1tchslap some sense into you

batman.jpg
 

Barrister

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OP,

Passage of time. It really does heal all wounds. You are coming off of a fix. You already know this but your body is having trouble letting go. Your mind has a way of making this woman seem like she is the greatest thing on Earth during a break up. She isn't. A year from now you will look back on this and wonder why you were lamenting about her being gone.

Hang in there. Keep your mind occupied with family, friends, and other women. The busier you stay the better off you will be.
 

soulforge

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@soulforge I love you bro, but its time to put on your big boy pants and never go back to an ex. Dont make me come to your location and b1tchslap some sense into you

View attachment 10683
Nah bro I would never do that.

Once that girl is gone, and especially if she has taken strange dik, it's game over.

They never come back the same, after chad and Tyrone have rearranged her guts.
 

Bingo-Player

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OP you have 10 negatives against 4 positives

I am not really seeing the struggle here

Our Modern society has taught Young women 20 -30 they can have it all

They usually want the stable BF at home , the bad boy / chad on the side , a sugar daddy in the background and a free ticket to ride the carousel whenever they want

You can't compete with this ideology its becoming hardwired into them via social media

Some guys can get a ticket for a ride on the bronco but there's no gaurentee your going to be able to stay on it especially when its in its prime
 

Gamisch

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I got no words for you bro at this point I recommend therapy.
I am like" this man seriously pretends like the previous 7? threads were not about her??? PORQOUI??"

Its like an altered reality . But whatever I geuss.
 

alvinkels

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Before someone will break up with someone he or she must vilify the person. To get over someone you have to return the gesture. No matter how tought she was an angel, now she is the devil incarnate. Don't go telling people about her and stop watching break up videos. Just know the ship has sailed and move on
 
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