Struggling To Get Over My Break Up!

[soulforge]

It sounds like the only real positives she’s got going for her are her age and hot body…although I’m a bit alarmed by your description of her as 8.5 body-wise but only 6.5 overall. Application of the mathematical principle of averages would suggest that her face has to be 4.5 to bring down the overall rating by two points. That’s real butterface territory but I digress…

Now compare that to the long list of very alarming red flags that you’ve described. What you did should have been a no brainer. I don’t know if this makes you feel any better but I walked away from my ex about a year ago because of her (at times) explosive temper and disrespectful attitude. And she was a solid 8.5 overall and didn’t have nearly as many red flags as your girl, so objectively speaking, it would have been a much more difficult decision. Still, you can’t be with someone who permits herself to act this way. A man who tolerates disrespect from a woman is disrespecting himself.

You make a fair point. You tolerated less nonsense from a hotter chick than mine.

I give you respect for that.

 

[SoSuave666]

You have to get over the way men and women “love.” It’s different. You’re very emotional, even after weeks. Meanwhile, she has 200 new suitors.

I haven’t posted in months. But with you specifically I see a lot of the same patterns. Maybe we need to work on you while there is still time? Food for thought.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Bro, why are yo that invested in her after 5 weeks? It was 9 months only. How many times did you guys see each other during the week? Did you guys do A LOT of activities together? Travelled together? Maybe you miss having her body but not actually loving her, cause you feel you're never gonna find another chick with that body?

Have you never dated a jezebel before? Women can get a man hooked on them by merely saying a sentence.

 

[soulforge]

Bro, why are yo that invested in her after 5 weeks? It was 9 months only. How many times did you guys see each other during the week? Did you guys do A LOT of activities together? Travelled together? Maybe you miss having her body but not actually loving her, cause you feel you're never gonna find another chick with that body?

Yeh I mean we saw eachother 3x a week later on, initially it was 2x a week.

To be honest you make a fair point, maybe it's just lust, I probably wouldn't be feeling that bad if she was a fvking 5 or a 6 lol

 

[soulforge]

Have you never dated a jezebel before? Women can get a man hooked on them by merely saying a sentence.

This absolutely this.. The Jezebel spirit was strong in this one.. No lie!

 

[CornbreadFed]

This absolutely this.. The Jezebel spirit was strong in this one.. No lie!

Especially if she had "The Fit"

 

[Learning Curve]

My man @soulforge i totally get you.

It's hard it will be hard. Keep your emotions in place and always separate logical decisions from emotional decisions.

The strongest negotiating position you will always have as a human being is to walk away and never look back. As hard as it is eventually it will become softer and your tolerance level of accepting the breakup will increase.

Try to keep your mind occupied at all times with stuff you like to do purpose-gym-drinks-friends-out

 

[Ricky]

My hobbies is lifting weights and getting fit as fuk.. nothing throws me off that path. Even in a relationship I hit the gym hard.

Making money and focusing on my career. I never fall off that path for a chick.

Maybe I just invested in a damaged crazy one!

Its hard. I loved the party girls and part of me still does

i married a real good one then i accidentally turned her bad. But its getting better from what i can tell

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

It's hard when so much worked well in a relationship - yet a deal breaker didn't.

I've had this occur to varying degrees a few times in life.

It's even worse when you're crazily attracted to them.

About 3 months ago, I let go of a girl 10 years my junior that could pass for 35, just a real beauty - but I had to - I was tired of some of her behaviors, and I'd broken up with her like 5-6 times in the intervening years - this time I made it ugly enough she'll never come back. And that's exactly what I wanted. She would ask to see me to break up in person, she'd come over and the best sex we'd had since the previous breakup would ensue, and I'd get sucked back in.

I let it happen. But no more - she still is texting here and there with some lame excuse to start chatting me up.

Just let go OP.

 

[CornbreadFed]

It's hard when so much worked well in a relationship - yet a deal breaker didn't.

I've had this occur to varying degrees a few times in life.

It's even worse when you're crazily attracted to them.

About 3 months ago, I let go of a girl 10 years my junior that could pass for 35, just a real beauty - but I had to - I was tired of some of her behaviors, and I'd broken up with her like 5-6 times in the intervening years - this time I made it ugly enough she'll never come back. And that's exactly what I wanted. She would ask to see me to break up in person, she'd come over and the best sex we'd had since the previous breakup would ensue, and I'd get sucked back in.

I let it happen. But no more - she still is texting here and there with some lame excuse to start chatting me up.

Just let go OP.

This is what should be applauded on this site, not the just make your toxic ex a plate nonsense I see spewed a lot.

 

[BadBoy89]

Bro good thread but you should have made her 31 rather than 24. A 16 year age difference for a sexual relationship is more believable than 23 years.

The largest age gap possible between movie stars on screen is 16-17 years. Leonardo, worth $245,000,000 US (cash), was 37 when he got with Margot at 21. There was a movie called Lust Caution where the main star actor, worth $350,000,000 US, was 44 and he beds a hot 27-year-old woman. That's 17 years difference.

When the age difference is 23 years, the story collapses, unless the OP is worth $750,000,000 US (cash).

 

[soulforge]

20 bodies at age 24 and you want to LTR her? Yikes.

It sounds like the cure to her combativeness was in your willingness to walk away - which is the only power a man has in any romantic relationship anyhow.
IF you were to continue this relationship with her, you need to develop your frame better and make it clear that she is not the one in control of the relationship. You don't cater to her, she caters to you. If she cannot accept those terms, then the choice is made.

Any woman can become feminine for the right man, but sometimes that 'right man' is an impossible standard.

Sorry that was a typo. Her body count isn't 20, it's actually 10. Well that is what she told me, and I didn't even ask her to tell me.

 

[IKO69]

10 @ 24 is already too many. C'mon Soul don't be this way. You might not realize it but re read your original post - you're giving this troublemaker way too much power over you. In your heart you know there's actually nothing special about this chick, save some above avg looks. Dime a dozen. Don't let slightly above avg looks cloud your decision making.

Character is just as important and from what you described--- fails to make the cut. If she fails to make the cut why should you care?

 

[NoFear]

Just base on:
Daddy issues
Depression
High body count ( even more than 4/5 AT 30 is too much)
You did the right thing.
Delete her phone number, socials and zero contact.

 

[soulforge]

Bit of an update.

So I removed her from my Facebook and I ain't the type to look at a chicks social media once I am done with her.

However one of my friends noticed her Facebook posts, and decided to tell me that she is posting alot about the heartbreak she is going through.

It sounds like she is suffering somewhat.

But hey I gave her ample opportunity, more than I should have. This is what happens when you take a real one for granted.

 

[soulforge]

10 @ 24 is already too many. C'mon Soul don't be this way. You might not realize it but re read your original post - you're giving this troublemaker way too much power over you. In your heart you know there's actually nothing special about this chick, save some above avg looks. Dime a dozen. Don't let slightly above avg looks cloud your decision making.

Character is just as important and from what you described--- fails to make the cut. If she fails to make the cut why should you care?

I hear you bro. Looks/sex that's all good, but for a long meaningful relationship character and quality is just as important.

I kinda need to look at the long term implications of being with this girl.

 

[Luni]

Bro good thread but you should have made her 31 rather than 24. A 16 year age difference for a sexual relationship is more believable than 23 years.

The largest age gap possible between movie stars on screen is 16-17 years. Leonardo, worth $245,000,000 US (cash), was 37 when he got with Margot at 21. There was a movie called Lust Caution where the main star actor, worth $350,000,000 US, was 44 and he beds a hot 27-year-old woman. That's 17 years difference.

When the age difference is 23 years, the story collapses, unless the OP is worth $750,000,000 US (cash).

so this is how a midwit thinks

 

[Millard Fillmore]

I agree five weeks isn't much time. This too shall pass.

When you get those feelings, accept them, then dismiss them. This is something I've learned through meditation.

Look up 10 minute calming meditations on YouTube. Daily Calm, Headspace etc.

And just stay busy. Sounds like she was a roller coaster. Those women can be addictive. Stable kind women w/little to know drama don't tend to be as "exciting" esp. in the sack. That's just the tradeoff.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Of course I have, its a rollercoster of emotions but at 5 weeks I was not thinking that much about her, the oxytocin in the brain was pretty much gone

Depends on the emotions & experiences exchanged with the woman. If this is just a woman you fvcked once every two weeks than this is understandable. From my experience, my girl would start an argument with me and it end up in a bad fight then she would come over and fvck the shvt out of me for hours. Then we would make up and be happy with each other during the weekend lol. Rinse and Repeat every week.

 

[Gamisch]

The biggest problem is your lack of honesty. Lack of honesty with us on the forum, with her and ofcourse most importantly: YOURSELF.

Its the 8th month of the year and now suddenly you are "5 weeks away from a recent breakup ". While a couple of months ago I believe @Murk asked you if it was THIS girl. You said no.

You pretend like you have 3 Lithuanian/Russian girls but its just one and the same. You're horniness combined with your insecurities allows her to keep coming back and disrespect you. Yet the forum(really lovely) treats this thread like a single unique case.

You already know that she will come back again. I've told you this in literally every thread you made about her: she is (in your perception) out of your league thus you are scared she is the last best thing you will ever get. I also wonder why you didn't respond to my question in your latest PREVIOUS thread about the quality of your matches on Bumble. That's kinda giving away that these matches aint THAT good, at least not "better" than this 24 y.o pretty girl and that makes sense if you are 48. You want too much bro...

You gotta pick a pill AGAIN..sigh. Morpheus must be tired of you now.