6 months dating her, no sex and she broke up with me

Bokanovsky

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Robert, many thanks for your replies! May i please ask why would she talk to me over 6 months period? Messaging me first, going out to dates every weekends with me, etc. She is very attractive girl, i think she could have gone with a lot of other different guys instead of me. I just can't explain this to myself.
Attention, validation, free dinners, gifts. And she didn't even have to sleep with you. What's not to like?
 

MatureDJ

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Been dating this girl (27 y/o) for 6 months. Haven't had sex with her, she had only one boyfriend and she told me she only has sex during serious relationship. We were pretty close to having sex couple of times, but she break it off in the last minute. Whenever i brougt the topic that we should start officially dating and become a couple, she told me "she is not sure yet, and need more time". But she also was messaging, calling me first a lot of times. So i think interest was there.

Recently, she broke up with me saying "You're a very cool, smart guy. You are very generous, knows how take care of a woman, you organized amazing dates, gifts. But spark is not there"

The reason she told me was that she tells a lot about her life to me, while i talk very little about my personal life. And she can't fell in love with me due to that.

While she says i'm a perfect guy who takes her to best dates she has ever been to, give amazing gifts, etc (from her words).

I know that might sound stupid, and lots of guys gonna critize me. But is there a way to get her back?
Why would you want her back? She is not attracted to you enough to allow you to deposit your semen in her - and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters in romance.

It's OVER for 6MonthVirginDatingCels.
 

MatureDJ

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Hi Duke,
Thanks for your reply!

I don't know , i got so attached to her. i never felt that spark from my side towards any woman yet, feel like what is she was the one?

and i could have done somwhere better, like opening up myself better.
If you regularly had more options, you wouldn't have felt so attached - you would just say, "eh, this is a dry hole - time to drill a well somewhere else".

"The One" is a Blue Pill construct.

This relationship was simply you as a Beta orbiter both to entertain her while she continued to look for a higher-tier replacement and also to have as an "in case of hitting The Wall" fallback husband - and she had come to the conclusion that you weren't good enough to keep around for the latter, probably because she realized that she would need to put out to keep you around. IOW, she hated the notion of your peniis in her so much that she would risk hitting The Wall without a fallback.

I have had a few girlfriends like this, and I seethe in anger when I look back at not being able to get poon from them. :mad: :mad: :mad:
 
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SW15

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That's complete and utter BS from her. Did you even attempt to escalate towards sex at some point or just hope she would do it for you?

Women don't make guys they are sexually attracted to and dating "wait" for 6 months...
Really? Then why didn't you have sex?

C'mon man...stop with the justifications. This can't be a lesson to learn from if all you are going to do is make excuses for her.
Honestly, this should be a wake up call to you. It's inexcusable to date a woman for 6 months without sex. You should have given her til the 4th or 5th date max and then sat her down and basically told her that if she isn't physically interested in you then you aren't able to date her and then she would have either fvcked you or moved on because she had low interest, which is what likely would have happened.

And why did she break up with you? Likely because she met a guy she was attracted to and had sex with him.
The only times when there is no sex within the first 3-5 dates is within devoutly religious communities. If that isn't applicable in this situation, then there were other issues. Devout religious practitioners who do not do pre-marital sex are typically not found participating in SoSuave forums.
 

MatureDJ

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Honestly, this should be a wake up call to you. It's inexcusable to date a woman for 6 months without sex. You should have given her til the 4th or 5th date max and then sat her down and basically told her that if she isn't physically interested in you then you aren't able to date her and then she would have either fvcked you or moved on because she had low interest, which is what likely would have happened.
I think I would just call/contact her with less frequency, and see if that gets her hamster wheel spinning enough for her to be the one to reach out to you. In fact, I did this once, and with her not making any effort to keep things going, I came to the conclusion that it was OVER, and moved on.
And why did she break up with you? Likely because she met a guy she was attracted to and had sex with him.
Yep. Alpha forks, Beta dorks.
 

MatureDJ

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OP: does no sex mean no handjobs or blojobs? Or just no penetration?

Have you ever been together naked?
I would consider any activity in which she gets me to ejaculate to be "sex" in this regard. I can dig that some women want to be virginal and don't want to risk pregnancy, etc., but she has to want to see my semen, which is a man's romantic essence.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Because he has no options, and a chance at getting poon beats no chance.
He has no chance. The only thing he can salvage at this point is his self respect which is laying in the gutter right now.

Nobody with that type of mindset you stated is going to successful in the first place, so that would be the first thing he would need to work on.
 

mikedee

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Where is she from? What's her background, culture?
I'm just curious.
 

The Duke

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Robert, many thanks for your replies! May i please ask why would she talk to me over 6 months period? Messaging me first, going out to dates every weekends with me, etc. She is very attractive girl, i think she could have gone with a lot of other different guys instead of me. I just can't explain this to myself.
She kept talking to you because that's what she wanted and it made her feel good. The conversation and attention you provided kept her feeling validated.

The currency being traded between a man and a woman is sex for attention. You kept letting her take large withdrawals in the form of attention you provided, yet she never paid you any return in the form of sex.

You should have cut her off way earlier.

Her behavior is not normal/healthy nor is yours.
 

Don732

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He has no chance. The only thing he can salvage at this point is his self respect which is laying in the gutter right now.

Nobody with that type of mindset you stated is going to successful in the first place, so that would be the first thing he would need to work on.
Man, what would be my best course of action now? I just feel devasted as well, like i tried to hard and couldn't get her. Like what if i will regreat and remember this my whole life like i couldn't get at least laid with that girl not even relationship.
 

mikedee

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A


from strict asian family
I see, the only thing you can do is to move on and find other girls and don't make the same mistakes.
There is no such thing as The One. Remember that.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Man, what would be my best course of action now? I just feel devasted as well, like i tried to hard and couldn't get her. Like what if i will regreat and remember this my whole life like i couldn't get at least laid with that girl not even relationship.
You walk away and you learn the lessons you need to from this so it doesn't happen again. Because if you don't learn from it, this will be what happens to you over and over and over again.
 

SW15

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@Don732 cannot salvage the current situation and needs to walk away.

Best thing @Don732 can do is lift weights, get big muscles, and become the 'top tier' guy women want to drop their panties for quickly.
 

Stoic

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Op,

As others have said, 6 months and no sex is unacceptable.

Beginning today, start treating yourself and your time as if it is extremely valuable.

This time ***** stole time from you that you should have been investing on your purpose and other pussie.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Its actually manageable to get her back. What was your reply to her breakup?
To do what? Play tiddlywinks with? OP needs to learn self respect not how to dig a giant hole for his self respect and bury it further underground.
 
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