Girl I'm Seeing Got Aggressive With Me

[CornbreadFed]

I doubt this. Why is she paying into this holiday and still is desperate to go with me, if she has checked out.

She should have been trying her best to avoid any type of commitment like a holiday with me, and thanking her stars that she no longer needs to go with me

Because it’s a holiday and they are hard to just jump out of like that. I went to Europe with my ex because I wanted to go to Europe lol and I just ghosted her after the trip.

 

[soulforge]

I honestly do not believe she wants to end things. I am certain she said that out of anger, and because I agreed to it, she is now pinning hope on is going on holiday together and working things out.

My problem now is, the breaking up card has been used, and I don't see how I can get back together with her after that.

 

[soulforge]

Because it’s a holiday and they are hard to just jump out of like that. I went to Europe with my ex because I wanted to go to Europe lol and I just ghosted her after the trip.

It's easy to jump out of. I press cancel on my app and she gets her money back in 2 weeks time

 

[soulforge]

Let's say for example she used the ending things card, but decides to back track on it.

Is it best to walk away now?

 

[Murk]

Geezer you're like a broken record. Why haven't you ended this already?

I went to Nice in December 2017 with my gf and we broke up just before but decided to go anyway as I'd already paid for it and was looking forward to it (I secretly wanted to spend some fun times with her). We had some fun, but we had a massive argument that ruined it, and I gave her some angry rough sex, January 2018 was the last time I ever spoke to or saw her again.

I wouldn't even bother going, the memories won't be great, just get your money back and book a lads holiday for July.

 

[soulforge]

Simple question guys. She just messaged me again about going on holiday together and wether I need a luggage case, as she can borrow one from her sister for me.

This situation is confusing.

Should I simply tell her that I will not be going and I will send her money back to her that she has paid in?

By not going on holiday with her, I am essentially ending the relationship.

However I cannot see any other choice, considering she dropped the, it's best we break up

 

[soulforge]

Geezer you're like a broken record. Why haven't you ended this already?

I went to Nice in December 2017 with my gf and we broke up just before but decided to go anyway as I'd already paid for it and was looking forward to it (I secretly wanted to spend some fun times with her). We had some fun, but we had a massive argument that ruined it, and I gave her some angry rough sex, January 2018 was the last time I ever spoke to or saw her again.

I wouldn't even bother going, the memories won't be great, just get your money back and book a lads holiday for July.

Yeh I feel the same way about cancelling it.

I think we could have salvaged something if she had not gone down the breaking up route, but not it's too late

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

OP: my $.02 for what it’s worth.

Reward her with your silence.

Cancel now. Don’t say a word to her about it before you do it. Hit cancel and send her a brief note saying “I’ve canceled the trip, whatever money is due you will be forthcoming when I get the refund.” Say nothing else. No matter what she comes back with.

After her behavior and lack of respect it’s time for you to reframe. Either way you win.

She either wakes the flock up and becomes submissive to your frame and you plate her.

Or she doesn’t and you dodge the bullet.

Either way she was acting out to try to gain control, show her she cannot.

Go no contact.

Do NOT FRET, she already ended the relationship you bend to her and go on this trip and you’re giving in, and she wins and thinks you’re a pushover either way you lose. 99.999% you go on the trip and it becomes a Shiite show and/or she dumps you when you get back.

Silence is a very powerful tool with women. I’ve gone silent on women for a year hard difficult chicks they always, without fail circle back, always. When they do you make the move for sex the minute they come through the door, and keep it sexual and do what you want not what they want. Often this turns into a short term hot fling then fades.

That’s all you’ll get out of this going forward. Cut your loss.

 

[CornbreadFed]

It's easy to jump out of. I press cancel on my app and she gets her money back in 2 weeks time

Who gives her the money?

 

[ThisIsSparta]

@soulforge did you get into this relationship after your escapade with that russian chick?

 

[Murk]

Yeh I feel the same way about cancelling it.

I think we could have salvaged something if she had not gone down the breaking up route, but not it's too late

Of course it's not too late, which is why in 10 days you will be on this holiday with her, and in 1-3 months you will make another post about her acting out/being disrespectful.

When does it end?

@soulforge did you get into this relationship after your escapade with that russian chick?

This is that same girl, same girl all the threads have been about.

 

[soulforge]

OP: my $.02 for what it’s worth.

Reward her with your silence.

Cancel now. Don’t say a word to her about it before you do it. Hit cancel and send her a brief note saying “I’ve canceled the trip, whatever money is due you will be forthcoming when I get the refund.” Say nothing else. No matter what she comes back with.

After her behavior and lack of respect it’s time for you to reframe. Either way you win.

She either wakes the flock up and becomes submissive to your frame and you plate her.

Or she doesn’t and you dodge the bullet.

Either way she was acting out to try to gain control, show her she cannot.

Go no contact.

Do NOT FRET, she already ended the relationship you bend to her and go on this trip and you’re giving in, and she wins and thinks you’re a pushover either way you lose. 99.999% you go on the trip and it becomes a Shiite show and/or she dumps you when you get back.

Silence is a very powerful tool with women. I’ve gone silent on women for a year hard difficult chicks they always, without fail circle back, always. When they do you make the move for sex the minute they come through the door, and keep it sexual and do what you want not what they want. Often this turns into a short term hot fling then fades.

That’s all you’ll get out of this going forward. Cut your loss.

I totally understand you, however my man I don't think she outright ended things.

"I think it's time to end things, no point in going on if you can't talk. I still want to go on the holiday we booked, when we get there, I can do my own thing and you can do your own thing"

What she means by no point in going on if you can't talk is, she tried calling me a few times but I was in work and couldn't take the call.

Also what is there to talk about... She told me to shvt the fuk up.. no apology, no acknowledgement of any wrong doing, she simply turned her back to me in bed and went to sleep. So I left in the morning.

Wether she clearly ended it or not, what it boils down to is, she took things to another level by mentioning let's just end it.

I don't think there is anything to go back to after this.

I will text her this afternoon and let her know the holiday is cancelled

 

[Murk]

Hope you both have fun on your holiday, tell us all about it when you get back.

 

[soulforge]

Hope you both have fun on your holiday, tell us all about it when you get back.

Haha I ain't going with her. I don't feel comfortable about it at all.

Going to cancel and send her money back

 

[Millard Fillmore]

This is the stuff that happens when a woman is trying to make you dump them.

Agree here. I failed this once, prolonged the inevitable, there was just extended stress and misery. Better to drop her now.

 

[Gamisch]

This is terrible to watch and read.

You want clear answers. Buy the problem is that you ask these questions to strangers who don't know the nitty gritty about this relationship. More importantly; YOU don't even know where you stand with her.

So all that's left is judge by general dating principles. One of the things I've learned is that when a woman is disrespectful like this, there is something boiling underneath the (visible )surface . You seem dumbfounded by her act , but I bet when you take a closer look you'll figure it out.

You ,with all due respect, are all talk. Why you gaf about that vacation? Hit that Goddamm cancel button RIGHT NOW. She can book a new vacation. But, you actually use this vacation as a last resort, another opportunity to "make things right ". Stop being a poosy, a pushover, a beta bytch and for once choose you. Yes i bet she is loolong good. Are you afraid you'll never pull another chick or something ??

Lets be real: this woman and mr soulforge are a BAD and TOXIC match up.

I know what you saying, but I very much doubt this is the case. This chick has been desperate to go on holiday with me.

She been making regular payments for the holiday, girls who are looking to bail out ain't making that type of commitment.

Cope. She seems desperate to get rid of you. This is NOT how a woman that's looking forward to spend a care free holiday woth someone she likes acts. And stop trying to get "respect" by saying she rwally super duper wants you despite her being disrespectful, and we all know you only told is 5% of what's really going on.

 

[LTG71]

She showed no respect for you with the “shut the fvck up” outburst. This will continue in multiple forms from here on out. The “let’s end this“ speech is a manipulation tactic to control the frame. Don’t fall for her games and do her the favor and end this. You should expect more respect from the person you are dating. Once she has no respect, she will walk all over you. No pu$$y is worth this type of behavior.

Sounds like a “great“ holiday is in your future If you decide to go.

 

[Murk]

And stop trying to get "respect" by saying she rwally super duper wants you despite her being disrespectful, and we all know you only told is 5% of what's really going on.

100% this

Also when a woman really loves and cares about you, they don't constantly do disrespectful sh*t, I've never been told to "STFU" by a girlfriend, what the actual fvck. To say you have no frame is an understatement. I think you're both mentally unstable.

 

[soulforge]

This is terrible to watch and read.

You want clear answers. Buy the problem is that you ask these questions to strangers who don't know the nitty gritty about this relationship. More importantly; YOU don't even know where you stand with her.

So all that's left is judge by general dating principles. One of the things I've learned is that when a woman is disrespectful like this, there is something boiling underneath the (visible )surface . You seem dumbfounded by her act , but I bet when you take a closer look you'll figure it out.

You ,with all due respect, are all talk. Why you gaf about that vacation? Hit that Goddamm cancel button RIGHT NOW. She can book a new vacation. But, you actually use this vacation as a last resort, another opportunity to "make things right ". Stop being a poosy, a pushover, a beta bytch and for once choose you. Yes i bet she is loolong good. Are you afraid you'll never pull another chick or something ??

Lets be real: this woman and mr soulforge are a BAD and TOXIC match up.



Cope. She seems desperate to get rid of you. This is NOT how a woman that's looking forward to spend a care free holiday woth someone she likes acts. And stop trying to get "respect" by saying she rwally super duper wants you despite her being disrespectful, and we all know you only told is 5% of what's really going on.

Simple question, if this is a woman who doesn't actually want to holiday with me, then why has she sent me 3 text in the last 5 hours asking if we are still going on holiday.

As for your other sentement, you are right.. I need to walk away from this. It's toxic

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This is terrible to watch and read.

You want clear answers. Buy the problem is that you ask these questions to strangers who don't know the nitty gritty about this relationship. More importantly; YOU don't even know where you stand with her.

So all that's left is judge by general dating principles. One of the things I've learned is that when a woman is disrespectful like this, there is something boiling underneath the (visible )surface . You seem dumbfounded by her act , but I bet when you take a closer look you'll figure it out.

You ,with all due respect, are all talk. Why you gaf about that vacation? Hit that Goddamm cancel button RIGHT NOW. She can book a new vacation. But, you actually use this vacation as a last resort, another opportunity to "make things right ". Stop being a poosy, a pushover, a beta bytch and for once choose you. Yes i bet she is loolong good. Are you afraid you'll never pull another chick or something ??

Lets be real: this woman and mr soulforge are a BAD and TOXIC match up.



Cope. She seems desperate to get rid of you. This is NOT how a woman that's looking forward to spend a care free holiday woth someone she likes acts. And stop trying to get "respect" by saying she rwally super duper wants you despite her being disrespectful, and we all know you only told is 5% of what's really going on.

This is why I said she has been trying to get him to dump her. Women who act this way suddenly do so because over the course of time their respect for you has reached a low enough level that they want to end things but want you to do it for them. Eventually if her respect reaches zero if you don't dump her she will dump you.

Things seem fine at times but you'll start getting nagging feelings and seeing some weird behaviors from them as they slowly work to wean themselves away from you emotionally and then increasingly physically.

Some days they will still be lovey dovey as this emotions go back and forth but over the course of time it will still be trending downward.

OP wants to know why she keeps texting about the vacation? Because she already paid for it! Probably is afraid OP will try and keep the money to retaliate. Also she knows that she can likely do her own thing and hook up with other guys if it goes sideways with OP while there so it's a no loss situation for her.