In your honest opinion..... is it really worth it ?

[Bokanovsky]

I believe they normalized it and found it still held.

Who’s “they” and how did they “normalize” it? This study sounds like typical pop science BS. It’s like doing a study that finds that most professional basketball players are taller than the average person and concluding that playing basketball makes one grow tall.

 

[Macadellic]

Read the title and OPs post.
Didn’t read the comments.

Anyways,
Think for yourself (which you are doing)
Live life on your terms (which you are doing)

OP,
Are you happy?

 

[Bible_Belt]

Tis better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all, said Alfred Lord Tennyson. I think I agree. I have had plenty of failed relationships, but if I had it to do over again, I don't think I would change much.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I like the thrill of the hunt

5 years ago when i was 25 i enjoyed it too , infact i would go as far as saying i loved it , then i went into a 4 year LTR and it kind of changed the way i viewed women and relationships

Also At 30 your tolerance for B.S seems to decline rapidly (mine certainly has)

I used to enjoy playing mental chess with them but now i am almost bored of it , especially when you come across a few bad apples who literally couldn't care if you dropped dead infront of them so long as they could make an instagram story out of it

 

[Bible_Belt]

5 years ago when i was 25 i enjoyed it too , infact i would go as far as saying i loved it , then i went into a 4 year LTR and it kind of changed the way i viewed women and relationships

Also At 30 your tolerance for B.S seems to decline rapidly (mine certainly has)

I used to enjoy playing mental chess with them but now i am almost bored of it , especially when you come across a few bad apples who literally couldn't care if you dropped dead infront of them so long as they could make an instagram story out of it

Just fyi, people older than you have no sympathy at all when you complain about your age. If I were 90 and you were 70 complaining about old age, I would be thinking "This mf'er has no idea."

 

[Bingo-Player]

Read the title and OPs post.
Didn’t read the comments.

Anyways,
Think for yourself (which you are doing)
Live life on your terms (which you are doing)

OP,
Are you happy?

I am neutral as you say its important to think for yourself and i do that a lot

As do i live on my own terms

but recently i find myself becoming increasingly irritated by the superficiality of modern society , i feel like there is enormous social pressure to present yourself as SOMETHING rather than SOMEONE

This seems to be trickling through almost every aspect of day to day life

I suspect i just need to find a group of people who feel the same way as me and i will be a lot happier.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Just fyi, people older than you have no sympathy at all when you complain about your age. If I were 90 and you were 70 complaining about old age, I would be thinking "This mf'er has no idea."

I'm not complaining just referencing what i have found to be true in my own experiences

 

[Bingo-Player]

It doesnt matter. Its like eating. You have to do it. No one is fully content without women.

I don't know if we can go that far lol

But the question wasn't "can we live without women ?" , it was " in your opinion are they worth it ?"

Like it or not there are a set of pro's and con's as i have outlined

The caveat of life is that at any given stage either set can quickly outweigh the other

For every man that is putting a ring on a woman finger in marriage , another a losing that ring in a divorce

 

[Bible_Belt]

I'm not complaining just referencing what i have found to be true in my own experiences

I'm just saying man, don't feel old if you are in your 30s. You're still young. You haven't missed anything important. The world is still your oyster.

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

I would say that for an introvert men with medium to low libido, the deal gets less and less interesting year after year.

In my case it's day and night since my late 10s and 20s, the biggest thing was the decreasing need for validation and social approval.

Also many services can be outsourced with no obligation toward any operator.

 

[Stanley]

5 years ago when i was 25 i enjoyed it too , infact i would go as far as saying i loved it , then i went into a 4 year LTR and it kind of changed the way i viewed women and relationships

Also At 30 your tolerance for B.S seems to decline rapidly (mine certainly has)

I used to enjoy playing mental chess with them but now i am almost bored of it , especially when you come across a few bad apples who literally couldn't care if you dropped dead infront of them so long as they could make an instagram story out of it

My tolerance for bull**** has remained consistent for some time, age has nothing to do with it. I've been in relationships with 'bad apples' and I know what I want and don't want. I'm not interested in a relationship unless the girl is worth being in a relationship with which is incredibly unlikely. I do not want a partner at this point in life.

 

[bat soup]

over the last 10 years ive met a lot of women i can categorically say only a handfull have added any kind of value to my life

Lets look at the benefits of having a woman first

1) companionship - this for me is probably the only reason i still bother even entertaining them it is nice to have someone to come home too

2) sex - Obviously for a lot of men having regular sex is essential

3) economy - in theory it is usually cheaper to live when you have a stable partner

4) Children - depends where you stand on this but generally yea if you want your own family you gotta have a woman involved

5) status - SOME people view being in a relationship as a status symbol


That is all i can think of
---------------------------

Now the negatives

1) Quality - in 2023 most women will have been tainted by social media in some shape or form i have noticed it tends to bring the worst traits out in them frankly i find this very unattractive

2) The rigmarole of the talking / dating stage - as a man i am quite happy to go out on a date with a new woman i like at a moments notice decide wether we like each other if we do move forward if not we leave it there ...... women seem to enjoy the back and forthing and all the nonsense that comes with it

We largely refer to this as "game" in the manosphere because that is literally the only way to describe it

I am not going to sugar coat it i find this ^^^^ perhaps the biggest of waste of my time on planet earth it frequently leads to absolutely nothing and takes a hell of a lot of mental energy to endure

3) Cheating - who cheats more women or men !?! i suspect the answer is equal

problem is when you invest a lot of time and energy in someone the last thing you want to do is find out they have been seeking attention elsewhere yet it happens every single day , the abuse of trust is a real breaker of men


4) Hypergamy - As a man you are almost forced to date below your value otherwise due to their nature women will usually want to "trade up" this almost means a man constantly needs to be levelling up to keep his woman interested ( not always the case but very common ) this can be very tiring

5) Drama - Women do usually love drama and can and will bring it into your life

6) drain on financial resources - some women can clean you out if your not careful

7) divorce - looking at the statistics this is a lot more common than we would like to believe but again the fallout from a failed marriage can be absolutely catastrophic


------------------------
Conclusion:


Appreciate i may have missed some dynamics out but for me at 30 i am starting to see very little benefit in actively pursuing women in 2023 , if one i like drops into my lap i will follow it up until i feel it's become a chore but overall i am going to focus on enjoying being alone and the peace that comes with it

Interested to hear other members perspectives......

On the other hand, some women do know how to cook.

 

[Bingo-Player]

On the other hand, some women do know how to cook.

Yea i goes that is a benefit but actually having a woman that wants to cook for you in 2023 would be a miracle

Far more likely to wanna be a "boss a$$ *****"

 

[bat soup]

Yea i goes that is a benefit but actually having a woman that wants to cook for you in 2023 would be a miracle

Far more likely to wanna be a "boss a$$ *****"

Equality in 2023: Men pay, whilst women sit on their increasingly fat asses.

 

[The Duke]

Is it worth it? That all depends on the man and where he is at in life. I've done it all. Over the past 20 years I've had a marriage, LTR's, fuhk buddies, new girls every 2-3months, $trippers, one night stands, etc. There is good and bad to it all.

It was worth it because of the good times and good memories. If you aren't enjoying it, then you need to find something else to enjoy. You should definitely try everything at least once, otherwise you won't ever know.

Here's what I learned: the better the woman, the more enjoyable she is long term. If you feel the juice isn't worth the squeeze you might try associating with better women or do something totally different.

But you are right, most women aren't worthy of long term commitment, even fewer worthy of marriage. My mom raised me to know what a valuable woman looks and acts like.