How is it not worth it to date a girl who is less physically attractive but ticks all the other boxes?

[FlexpertHamilton]

Specifically in the context of an LTR, imagine you had to choose between the following:

a) Cluster B girl who's a 9/10 and pita to deal with, but great sex and attractive

b) Feminine, submissive, supportive, loyal, 5 or 6/10 who will cherish your soul


How is b) not the better option?

 

[Steno]

b easily

 

[RickTheToad]

 

[BillyPilgrim]

How is b) not the better option?

INSECURITY

write it on a chalkboard 1,000 times or until the end of detention, whichever is later.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Specifically in the context of an LTR, imagine you had to choose between the following:

a) Cluster B girl who's a 9/10 and pita to deal with, but great sex and attractive

b) Feminine, submissive, supportive, loyal, 5 or 6/10 who will cherish your soul


How is b) not the better option?

Because no matter how good option B is and treats you, you will always want someone who is hotter and you will feel you can do better than her looks wise.

Eventually you will find someone hotter who is interested in you or who hits on you and it will be very hard to resist not going for it.

TLDR; You will always be ready to dump her for someone hotter and likely will eventually

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Because no matter how good option B is and treats you, you will always want someone who is hotter and you will feel you can do better than her looks wise.

Eventually you will find someone hotter who is interested in you or who hits on you and it will be very hard to resist not going for it.

TLDR; You will always be ready to dump her for someone hotter and likely will eventually

And she's going to feel this too

 

[Black Widow Void]

My avg. now is typically dating women that would rank between a "7" or an "8." When I was younger, I strived for 8 and above. When you start into the "9" category, you usually deal with higher maintenance and female smugness. You are also guaranteed that if you walk away from your bar seat, you'll return with somebody trying to move in on your girl. All this gets old quick.

Although I would not kick a "no strings attached" "8" or above out of bed, I find myself more content and fulfilled with 7's (that checked off more boxes) than I do with 8's or above (that didn't check off as many boxes) .

Being honest with myself, part of my youthful higher standard was to prove to myself that I could attract them. Also, it was a nice boost to the ego. I would be the envy of some friends while some of them would get angry (jealousy, I suppose) which was still flattering.

Bedroom activity is still important of course. But there's also something to be said for sitting across from a gal over coffee or wine and actually enjoying that moment too.

 

[Bigpapa]

Specifically in the context of an LTR, imagine you had to choose between the following:

a) Cluster B girl who's a 9/10 and pita to deal with, but great sex and attractive

b) Feminine, submissive, supportive, loyal, 5 or 6/10 who will cherish your soul


How is b) not the better option?

because you can find a b that is also hot . They do exist

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

B all day, but this isnt create-a-player in madden or something. Tradeoffs don't really exist and values dont scale.

This is true, sadly. In my experience, the less attractive women can be just as delusional and entitled. Amazing. I just assumed that most of them are higher quality to compensate, but I don't think women have enough self awareness to realize their own value like that.

 

[EyeBRollin]

B) is way better but you have cut a deal with her because you will step out from time to time.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I don't think women have enough self awareness to realize their own value like that.

Women have no self awareness at all and are incapable of introspection.

 

[member160292]

THIS ^^^
Last night I’m spinning a plate - barely a 6 - and she’s a…..wait for it…..special Ed teacher (read: broke as ****)! Internally she really wants to be a catch, but her voice is shaky, her hair is stringy, she’s drinking white wine out of a coffee cup, nails look like shiz, and she needs a bath. Thought she’d interview me with her list of blah blah blah. LOL I don’t think so. I dodged every stupid question, strung her along, and held that mirror up to her for a solid 40 minute set until she could take it no more. Cruel? Maybe…but it’s fun to mind frk some of these worthless ****s.

LOL, I like your style! Broke. Ass. B.

 

[Bigpapa]

Women have no self awareness at all and are incapable of introspection.

they do that , but not on a personal level ( like men do ) . They do it at situational level

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

INSECURITY

write it on a chalkboard 1,000 times or until the end of detention, whichever is later.

Insecurity can also cause you to only go after hot women because of a need to prove yourself to others.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

On paper, option B is the way to go. But I can tell you from recent experience, the body wants what the body wants. So there is a balance.

Recently I started dating girl 1. She is good-looking, above average I would say, guys def notice her. She runs her own business, is intelligent, driven, caring, and family-oriented, has had only 1 bf, high sex drive, has high interest, and pursues me and puts the effort to match the high interest. Again, on paper, she is the ideal "wifey material".

Right around the same time, I met girl 2. She is going through a divorce, has mental health issues, does not know where she stands, plays hot and cold, pursues me, and has high interest but due to her anxiety and depression, it can dwindle and make you wonder. She is a cutie and has an athletic body (something that gets me), a high sex drive, and is a freak. She is not your "wifey material".

Of the two I chose girl 2 (and it bit my ass, yep), but I simply stopped feeling attracted to girl 1. My body simply desired her. And I felt awful but I just didn't want to kiss her and avoided sex with her. I was the one hot and cold, and def colder towards the end than hot. I felt way more magnetized to girl 2. I desired her. Why? I don't know. Maybe because I am a coach and want to "help" people. I do not know. But I knew my body desired her. Over time I know that would have diminished and her mental and personal issues would have bored me but at the time I listened to my body, not my mind.

So long story short, sometimes we choose not what it's best for us in the long run (the logical option) but what gets us feel like an animal. We, as men, are wired to listen to our primal ways and not so much our logic. Logic came after primal.

Maybe there is a middle point of ticking some "wifey material" boxes and feeling primal. Relationships are mutual acts of servitude and they are also intimate and primal. It is the way of humanity.


Modern Man Advice

 

[Barrister]

Because sex with Girl B is not going to do it for your male brain/d1ck long term. That's why.

New sex with a HB 6 is certainly exciting because she is new. Sex with HB 6 over the course of months or even years is going to be become a bore. In fact, this will happen regardless of how hot the woman is, but it happens much faster with a woman of less attractiveness unless she is hardcore in bed - which she likely isn't.

She may cook dinner for you and sweep the house instead of worrying about her instagram as much as HB 9 does, but guaranteed this doesn't satisfy you long term. Hot women also have a penchant for detecting a man who has way higher SMV than his LTR girlfriend and will actively test you. As other posters have said - that is easier to resist (not necessarily easy) if your woman is herself hot. Tougher if you are with plain Jane.

 

[member160292]

Youth and earning potential should be included for option A, if we are talking about extrinsic value. Everything in option B should be there when you enter a relationship.

My ex I'm seeing is my age and gets a lot glances from other guys, sex is great. She's all of (B)

I'm using her as a benchmark for on my other plates. Of course, (B) will only come out at least 3 months down the line. Spotting flags that they won't satisfy option (B) should allow for quick dismissal, anyways.

The challenge here is that you want everything under the sun and it's not going to happen. It depends on what you value and see if the compromise will make you happy long term. It's tough.

 

[wifehunter]

high maintenance Ferrari vs Toyota Camry

Camry every time. : )

 

[Kotaix]

Specifically in the context of an LTR, imagine you had to choose between the following:

a) Cluster B girl who's a 9/10 and pita to deal with, but great sex and attractive

b) Feminine, submissive, supportive, loyal, 5 or 6/10 who will cherish your soul


How is b) not the better option?

If you put it this way, then b) all the way. But this is like picking between a golden retriever and a rabid pittbull. Cluster B women will make your life a living hell when the relationship eventually goes south; and it WILL go south if you have self-respect.

I think a better comparison is just hot women in general vs less attractive women.

Hot women (who aren't crazy/broken) are still cursed by their looks. They are given everything by men on a silver platter, their entitlement problem is our fault. A hot woman will always have better options than you, and the chances are higher that you're going to waste your time on her.

 

[EyeBRollin]

A, no brainer

Sooner or later, B will become your worst nightmare (like A), but A is hot and you will alway enjoy f*cking her.
I would never go for anything below 8, it's not worth it.

95% of men will never get to lock down an 8.