Jesse Pinkman's approach/field reports thread.

[SW15]

day 6 of NoFap for me and man it was insane. I had a prolonged erection and felt that I could do a woman all night long. Swore my **** must have also grown just slightly bigger. I measured it and it was like 6.1 inches so eh, still a very average size but motion in the ocean and not always size of wave eh.

I think that there are some benefits to NoFap.

Yes, there are NoFap benefits. 6.1 inches is on the higher side of average. Average is about 5.5 inches. A 6.1 inch penis will impress most women, unless she's a size queen. There aren't that many size queens out there.

I swear, I had never been hornier this year so far. It is like all I could think of was sex sex sex and then come to find, it was pouring rain outside so forget doing cold approaches.

You could have done indoor approaches at a gym, fitness class, mall, grocery store, book store, or coffee shop.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Oh and completely OT too but man, melatonin does not work in terms of getting you to sleep, ugh.

I wish it did because it would solve a lot of issues for me

What's up with that? I have mostly stayed away from female platonic friendships during the course of my life. While I have messed up a lot of things in my dating and relationship life over time, this has probably been good for me. The downside of no female friends is that I haven't had any social circle setups, which forced me over time to use dating websites/apps and doing stranger approaches.

I've never really had female friends either. Just a lot of acquaintances or past exes I still keep in contact with. Even in the social circles I was in, nobody was hooking me/giving me warm leads with women so that's not even guaranteed lol.

 

[SW15]

Even in the social circles I was in, nobody was hooking me/giving me warm leads with women so that's not even guaranteed lol.

I know a guy who has gotten 2 LTRs resulting in marriages out of his social circle. I've mentioned him here before. He's the example I've seen utilize social circles "best". The problem with social circle guys is while they have an advantage on the front end of relationships, they often get burned on the back end of relationships. Social circle guys are rather blue pilled. Social circles tend to get pissed off with men who cycle through women every 1-3 years without marrying them or having babies with them. Serial monogamist, Fucck Boy, and player behaviors are tended to be viewed as negatives in social circles. Guys who form relationships in social circles end up getting married and often these relationships run their course, albeit slowly. It sometimes might take a decade or longer for the relationships to crap out.

In my local area friend group, 1 male friend and 1 acquaintance formed LTRs through the social circle. In both cases, there was intense male competition to get with those 2 women. For me, the best case scenario with either of those women would have been 1 year relationships. I still don't wish to be around either of those women due to the memories.

Why did you never get leads in social circles?

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Common sense here but say I am a guy in a social circle and I know I have a shot with a hot girl, why in god's name would I ever bother introducing her to other guys or letting other guys have a shot at her? People hype up social circle game like none other but IMO, it is one of the worst ways to meet women. Most of the hot girls are taken and dating guys that are not even in the given social circle.

So much of what people say about social circle game is nonsense. Maybe it is good for an LTR, who knows, but for all else it sucks.

As for my point about bars, it seems to be the Miami thing. Miami has a crappy nightlife scene.

 

[SW15]

Common sense here but say I am a guy in a social circle and I know I have a shot with a hot girl, why in god's name would I ever bother introducing her to other guys or letting other guys have a shot at her?

That's exactly what happens when social circles have a decent number of unattached males in them. The unattached males compete like crazy for the females. For social circle to work, there needs to be some non-marital, stable couples. Married couples tend to associate with other married couples and they tend to know few singles unless someone's sister or cousin is single and happens to live in the same area.

People hype up social circle game like none other but IMO, it is one of the worst ways to meet women. Most of the hot girls are taken and dating guys that are not even in the given social circle.

So much of what people say about social circle game is nonsense. Maybe it is good for an LTR, who knows, but for all else it sucks.

People hype up social circle because it is easier once the social circle is actually built. A lot of people are still living off of the social circles that they built as a pre-teens well into adulthood.

If you can use social circle, you don't have to deal with the shiit that comes from apps. Less chance of ghostings, flakings, rudeness, and generally inhumane treatment. You don't have to fight earbuds at the parks, on the paths, and in gyms. It's easier to capture attention.

It's good for getting an initial fair evaluation and maybe getting into a relationship. Over an extended period of time, social circles tend to get pissed if you engage in player or serial monogamist behavior. It's good for LTRs on the marriage track.

Miami has a crappy nightlife scene.

The nightlife scene in Dallas isn't that great either.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Common sense here but say I am a guy in a social circle and I know I have a shot with a hot girl, why in god's name would I ever bother introducing her to other guys or letting other guys have a shot at her? People hype up social circle game like none other but IMO, it is one of the worst ways to meet women. Most of the hot girls are taken and dating guys that are not even in the given social circle.

So much of what people say about social circle game is nonsense. Maybe it is good for an LTR, who knows, but for all else it sucks.

As for my point about bars, it seems to be the Miami thing. Miami has a crappy nightlife scene.

Not only that, but the good-looking girls are also always heavily simped over...even by guys that are already in relationships.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I know a guy who has gotten 2 LTRs resulting in marriages out of his social circle. I've mentioned him here before. He's the example I've seen utilize social circles "best". The problem with social circle guys is while they have an advantage on the front end of relationships, they often get burned on the back end of relationships. Social circle guys are rather blue pilled. Social circles tend to get pissed off with men who cycle through women every 1-3 years without marrying them or having babies with them. Serial monogamist, Fucck Boy, and player behaviors are tended to be viewed as negatives in social circles. Guys who form relationships in social circles end up getting married and often these relationships run their course, albeit slowly. It sometimes might take a decade or longer for the relationships to crap out.

In my local area friend group, 1 male friend and 1 acquaintance formed LTRs through the social circle. In both cases, there was intense male competition to get with those 2 women. For me, the best case scenario with either of those women would have been 1 year relationships. I still don't wish to be around either of those women due to the memories.

Why did you never get leads in social circles?

Sorry I'm also pigging back on your below comment, but what is your idea of a perfect social circle? Most social circles I know have taken females, the mother hens(whales) and maybe 2 serial single females that only bang Chads/Tyrones outside of it. I know plenty of guys in social circles that still struggle to get laid. I feel like you are just better off developing yourself and being a lone wolf rather than relying on one. Ideally, I think the best circle would be a run club because the girls tend to be on the skinnier side, they have drink events, and it has a constant rotation.

 

[SW15]

what is your idea of a perfect social circle? Most social circles I know have taken females, the mother hens(whales) and maybe 2 serial single females that only bang Chads/Tyrones outside of it.

I've never had a quality social circle so I'm not the best person to ask. My Dallas area social circle has never resembled what you described. There was never a mother hen and only fleeting appearances by unattached women. Mostly couples.

I know plenty of guys in social circles that still struggle to get laid. I feel like you are just better off developing yourself and being a lone wolf rather than relying on one.

I've been the lone wolf guy. The lone wolf guy is often dealing with swipe app bullshiit or taking a difficult path of approaching strangers. He's prone to more ghosting, flaking, and generally rude and inhumane treatment. He might even struggle to get attention due to earbuds.

I think the best circle would be a run club because the girls tend to be on the skinnier side, they have drink events, and it has a constant rotation.

I have no experience with run clubs. I've tried co-ed sports leagues and wasn't impressed.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Well, the Hurricane is supposed to make landfall later on today in Northern Florida and it is going to cost a ton of damage. Miami will be out of its path but we have been experiencing a ton of wind and heavy rains all of this week which is likely to get worse. All of this to say that game is out of the question for this week and I am seriously thinking of starting online dating back up again, temporarily at least.

 

[SW15]

Well, the Hurricane is supposed to make landfall later on today in Northern Florida and it is going to cost a ton of damage. Miami will be out of its path but we have been experiencing a ton of wind and heavy rains all of this week which is likely to get worse. All of this to say that game is out of the question for this week and I am seriously thinking of starting online dating back up again, temporarily at least.

What about indoor, non-bar approaching? Grocery stores, malls, bookstores, coffee shops, the gym, and fitness classes are all options. Indoor, non-bar approaching is way better than swiping on Hinge/Tinder/Bumble.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

What about indoor, non-bar approaching? Grocery stores, malls, bookstores, coffee shops, the gym, and fitness classes are all options. Indoor, non-bar approaching is way better than swiping on Hinge/Tinder/Bumble.

Most of the city is sort of shut down since it had some light flooding this week from the storm. I am not a fan of indoor approaching as much although I have occasionally done it.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Completely OT but since this is borderline my journal, good news on the job front. I have had interviews with 6 different companies this week which have all progressed well. It seems like as September started to wind down, companies got crazy into hiring mode. I am close to having a couple of offers on the table but one of them would have me working in the office two days a week which is kind of a no for me.

The good pay I do have is from two startups though, they are both at a Series C which means they are mature enough but I am wondering if I really want to go from a Fortune 500 company to a startup. Going to vet them a bit for work-life balance but things are finally looking up on the job hunt front, finally.

 

[SW15]

I am not a fan of indoor approaching as much although I have occasionally done it.

Why are you not a fan of indoor, non-bar approaching as compared to outdoor, non-bar approaching?

In certain indoor venues, I find it is easier to capture attention than in outdoor venues. Approaching a woman at the end of a fitness class isn't that much different than approaching a woman at the end of a high school or a college class. It has been my experience that you're more likely to get a 60 second + conversation out of a woman at the end of fitness class than on a walking path or at the park. Parks and paths have a big earbud problem, as does the general gym floor. Historically, I have had an easier time doing approaches in the grocery store than the mall. I've also rarely seen women I want to approach in book stores.

The good pay I do have is from two startups though, they are both at a Series C which means they are mature enough but I am wondering if I really want to go from a Fortune 500 company to a startup. Going to vet them a bit for work-life balance but things are finally looking up on the job hunt front, finally.

The key phrase is "mature enough". Are they over or under 100 employees? Working in super small companies (under 100 employees) has some big downsides. Those under 100 employee companies can be rather unstable.

It seems like as September started to wind down, companies got crazy into hiring mode. I am close to having a couple of offers on the table but one of them would have me working in the office two days a week which is kind of a no for me.

The stock market has had a lousy September so I would have thought more offers would be rescinded and more job requisitions would be canceled as the stock market goes into the toilet.

I have never had full time work at home privileges. I was one of the first layoffs when the pandemic hit and I've only been part time at home since I returned to the work force in the latter part of 2020.

 

[kavi]

Re: Social groups and social 'circle'. This is what I would do if I wanted to meet new women and build a kind of social group.

Find a bar or some kind of meetup or social place where there are regular people and girls and maybe some guys. Its not about being in one tight or closed off social circle, but a place where you will regularly see the same girls over and over. Then I would go there and over some weeks interact with the girls there, maybe go there once a week and hope to see the same girls over and over. Seeing a girl regularly I would 'run game' and build up the attraction and interest. Then get a phone number and take it to txt or whatever.

I know what you guys are saying about social circles having lots of men who will not let you in. Let me know tell you an example of this from my own history. This social group I am part of, it is a big meetup type thing with lots of random people. From this big meetup there is a group of younger men and girls who regularly hang out and go to pubs and bars, so this is what we mean by 'social circle'. This little group has the main girls in there and so the guys are quite protective.

I knew all the girls and guys from this big meetup that were part of this social group. But I was never part of this social circle that went to the pub, they were also on a Whatsapp group that I wasnt part of. Thing is, I was really close to the main girls in this group, but the guys had never seen me talking to these girls. So alot of guys would treat me kinda crap and not welcome me into this social group cos they just wanted to be around the girls and not really want me around, not knowing that I was actually closer to the girls than they were.

Anyway, with a bit of effort I managed to get into the whatsapp group, and starting going to the pub with these people more regularly. The guys started seeing just how close I was to the girls and now I am 'working' with one of the friendler guys in this group to try and build it up by adding more girls in there. Just the other day there were these 3 21 year olds, one of them this guy had met while the group was out, and the other 2 her friends. They were from foreign countries, french, mexican and ukrainian.

One of the girls came to our big meetup event cos she was free on that day and the guy had invited her. She was a 21yr old french au pair so kinda shy and not too loud and confident and just looking to have a better life in london. Anyway, I made convo with her that day when we were chilling and she kinda liked me. The next week she came back with 2 friends. I was chilling with them 3 for a while and they thought I was really nice and got 2 of the numbers, the other one was going back to mexico later that week.

So now I got the numbers of these 2 girls. I am talking to one and the other one a bit less. They are both going back to their home countries in week or so. I have been good to them so far and will continue to be this guy, the goal is make them feel they have some big social group and me and other cool people in london so they can come back. I know the french girl she is from some small town and she dont wanna stay there, said she might go australia, but I reckon I can get her to come back to london and be part of this social group.

There is still a week before this girls goes back. She mentioned me to be that her best friend was leaving london and she was feeling lonely. I few days later I asked her if it was the other girl whose number I had who had left. She responded "No, why?". I am thinking to take them both out and show them a good time but my real goal is to get them to come back to london and stay long term not taking them out and trying to get a 3some or whatever lol.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Completely OT but since this is borderline my journal, good news on the job front. I have had interviews with 6 different companies this week which have all progressed well. It seems like as September started to wind down, companies got crazy into hiring mode. I am close to having a couple of offers on the table but one of them would have me working in the office two days a week which is kind of a no for me.

The good pay I do have is from two startups though, they are both at a Series C which means they are mature enough but I am wondering if I really want to go from a Fortune 500 company to a startup. Going to vet them a bit for work-life balance but things are finally looking up on the job hunt front, finally.

I went from a Fortune 10 company to a startup. There are some pros and cons.

Cons
-Unpredictable BS from growing pains of a startup
-A lot more uncertainty, but that can happen in a big company too
-Nobody knows the name of your company and you always have to explain it to strangers

Pros
- A lot less bureaucracy and red tape
- You aren't just a cog in a large machine, they take care of you more and you can be heard a lot easier
- If the company succeeds then you will reep the awards
- Less Office Space Corporate BS

At the end of the day, it's still work lol

 

[SW15]

At the end of the day, it's still work lol

Work sucks.

Re: Social groups and social 'circle'. This is what I would do if I wanted to meet new women and build a kind of social group.

Would you avoid both app swiping and approaching strangers (non-bar or bars) in favor of that plan?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Work sucks.

Kinda deep but half of the jobs out there are unnecessary and the workweek is structured to prevent us from thinking too much, imo.

 

[SW15]

Kinda deep but half of the jobs out there are unnecessary and the workweek is structured to prevent us from thinking too much, imo.

I agree with this.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I think I might have asked you this before, but do you ever have to deal with Playing with Fire lol?

 

[kavi]

Definitely agree that work sucks. For men to do better with women and relationships, and generally emotional and mental well-being we really need to be in more of a socialism type of world where jobs are easier and less stressful. The interplay between work/career and women/love for men is complicated but very closely related and for sure modern work and careers will really make your game and emotional strength much weaker.