How Porn Addiction Destroys Men’s Brains and How to Escape It

[corrector]

Same issue. Actually, it is the core of the issue. But it appears you do not see it, and that is the issue.

Sex is not a social transaction. It was never meant to be a surface-level transaction, at least not in the development of our specific species which the closest are the chimps. This is why I asked the question about Chimps vs Bonobos that you clearly missed or do not the difference to.

In porn, sex is a social and selfish transaction. Not to mention real-life sex doesn't like that at all unless you watch amateur porn.

Anyway, I'm pretty positive you still don't see the issue nor will want to research sex throughout evolution, sex revolution in the 60's, sex related to female empowerment, etc and clearly you are a porn fan so let's agree to disagree.


Modern Man Advice

Why are you defining porn as hard core porn though? It could just be a woman that's posing in a suggestive way even with clothes on. That's also porn. Anything that incites lust in your mind is by definition porn.

 

[SmoothHendrixPS2]

@lost_blackbird I don't care if you're banned or not. That's not important to me. It's your negative outlook on women that does nothing for men who are looking to improve their lives. That's my only motivation behind this interaction. I am a leader who speaks for all men who seek improvement. So unless you have factual evidence that your mindset towards women is beneficial for men in our society, than my opinion is extremely valid.

You contradict yourself when you say it's only a wet hole. Despite it being more of a dry well during your time together, why did some useless wet hole change your life forever? It must have some serious power if it made you into this Volcel... Ahhh maybe women in fact do have all of the power... And thanks for admitting that your mistake was thinking she was different. When you realized she wasn't different, you turned into this spiteful human being you are today. Yea thank god for revision and editing or else I wouldn't have my masters.

 

[lost_blackbird]

I'm not sure who made you a leader of men, I think that may be in your own head.
Just like I don't care about your education, I didn't care much for the pair of degrees my wife had either.
She still saw fit to marry me, with my basic secondary education. I'm more of a practical type anyway.
Maybe that was the appeal, a man that can build stuff and drive big trucks and cranes. Who knows?

I don't think you seem to get that it was I who rejected her ultimately. For things she did which I have no
need to discuss here. The reason we didn't have a great deal of sex was because after she crossed the line
I never pursued it anymore, I just wasn't interested anymore. I went overnight back into my mindset prior
to this relationship. Back to the time when I thought they just weren't worth the hassle. Back to when I was
celibate for 7 years (ages 21-28 for reference) as I've already mentioned. It is true to say however that
I turned her down a great many times during my marriage, I'd feign illness, pretend to be asleep or deliberately
be a d1ck all day so that banging me would be the last thing on her mind. It took a while but eventually she
stopped trying. I saw to that pretty permanently by moving into the spare room. There was no shouting or
arguing as some might imagine there would have been, just quiet protest.

As some posters have suggested, it isn't this one woman that I married that turned me any way or another.
I was born like this, I was this way when I met her, I remember her telling me how confused she was that I wasn't
all over her back then, she couldn't figure out why I wouldn't make a move. Despite her knowing I was 7 years celibate.
At the time I was 28, with her being just 18. Our first sexual experience involved her pushing me against the wall, and
getting to her knees until the job was done. I never started anything, we were just talking about music. I just don't initiate
anything with women, ever. I am not driven to do so, so the heat of the moment doesn't exist for me. I have been 1cm
away from physical penetration before and still found a reason to bail long before I ever met my wife to be. If you
knew jack sh1t about autistic people as you claim, you'd know that unusual attitudes to sex held by autistic people
are far from uncommon. As a side note, I never knew that this was a neurotypical only platform. I'm only entertaining
this conversation at all because my story is every bit as real as the d1ck growing out of your forehead, and thus deserves
to be heard. It may not be a typical story in some ways but in many others, it played out like many marriages do.

In a nutshell, despite my natural inclinations to avoid and never pursue women, I met someone who I thought was
worth the effort. I tried to slot into the boyfriend/fiance/husband storyline that we have rammed down our throats,
because I thought I'd found an exception to my rule. I was wrong. So it's back to default settings for me. The
difference between then and now being that I care no longer about fitting into the storyline again.

 

[corrector]

Thanks for clarifying this. But why do you look at porn though? You are still getting a type of sexual welfare from porn which means you still like women.

 

[lost_blackbird]

I never said that looking at naked women wasn't stimulating, of course there's still a physical response.
Dealing with the real thing however is far from stimulating unless you count being in a state of constant doubt
stimulated. For me jacking off is like blowing ones nose or clearing ones throat. That said, the clarity immediately
afterward just tends to confirms my natural biases.

 

[BadBoy89]

Sex is not a social transaction. It was never meant to be a surface-level transaction, at least not in the development of our specific species which the closest are the chimps.

You are right it is not.

But when the laws, the courts, the system, and the community make it a social transaction, the layman has to accept it.

Your point is good in theory, but it's not reality.

 

[logicallefty]

I'm no Chad or even close. But never had issues getting mud for the duck. No matter if I was single and spinning plates, seeing regular FWBs, LTRs, or married like I am now. Regardless, I still enjoy a good porn session sometimes. When I have sex with a woman I am very hard on myself (no pun) about MY performance for her.. I won't have sex with any woman if I am not 100% clean and 100% into it. If I'm tired from working and not gonna be worth a shyt for her, I will pass on sex. I pride myself on pleasing the women I rail and giving them the O they can't get enough of; be it my wife or even a plate. If I'm not gonna be 100% for her, I don't partake. I said all that to say this. For me, sometimes porn and a wank is way less effort for me and much quicker to achieve the final result, so I choose it.

 

[zekko]

Agree completely. And it’s actually a good thing. It’s a form of “fake it until you make it.”
It’s probably one of the few viable paths from zero to a true abundance mindset.

It's the "delusionally self confident" aspect. My problem is I have always been too cynical to buy into it to that extent. But I've always known you're supposed to appear confident so I've always faked that. Not arrogant, but confident. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I've always liked the PUA saying don't come up with a reason for the girl to reject you, make her come up with it.

 

[Mike32ct]

It's the "delusionally self confident" aspect. My problem is I have always been too cynical to buy into it to that extent. But I've always known you're supposed to appear confident so I've always faked that. Not arrogant, but confident. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I've always liked the PUA saying don't come up with a reason for the girl to reject you, make her come up with it.

Yeah the “delusional” part always made me cringe. Like during Mystery’s tv show where he told his students, “From now on, you are all 10s.”

Faking a decent baseline level of confidence to grease the skids is totally fine. But delusional confidence is cringe at best and dangerous at worst lol.

 

[corrector]

I'm no Chad or even close.

Your a police officer though. Women dig that sort of thing since it's alpha-male career. You probably have a good masculine frame in order to have taken that job. You think some short scrawny looking dude is going to become a police officer? Criminals would laugh at that.

Honestly, do you really know any cops who is struggling with women?

 

[zekko]

Yeah the “delusional” part always made me cringe. Like during Mystery’s tv show where he told his students, “From now on, you are all 10s.”

I could never stand that "We're all 10s" idea. For one thing, I don't believe anyone is a 10. And second, if you don't realize your flaws, you can't correct them. Being a 10 implies you are perfect, and there's no such thing.

 

[eli77]

This post hit home for me between the age of 18 to 25 i had three addictions nightclubs cheesecake and online p*** it is so readily available nowadays it's ridiculous.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Your a police officer though. Women dig that sort of thing since it's alpha-male career. You probably have a good masculine frame in order to have taken that job. You think some short scrawny looking dude is going to become a police officer? Criminals would laugh at that.

Honestly, do you really know any cops who is struggling with women?

lol most women hate cops

 

[nismo-4]

No porn and no masturbation is a huge element of success in the attraction-seduction game.

Maybe so, maybe not.

But it's not like you can go tell a bunch of 25 year old virgins that if they stop jacking off and stop watching porn and stop looking at women, they'll all have a hot date with IG models that see them as alpha Chad or Tyrone or Hiroshi a month later.

Not every guy has half the options of Drake, Lebron James, Dwayne Johnson, or Elon Musk.

 

[bat soup]

Anything in excess is bad

 

[member160292]

The best sessions I had were during Covid while in an LTR. For those wankers that don’t need women, check out sex like real + the handy

 

[eli77]

Gentlemen,

It's all about your perception. Many of us are socially programmed to feel shame for masturbating. Do I believe that No Fap is beneficial? Yes! Testosterone builds up, libido builds up, all while practicing self discipline. Internet porn is a serious addiction. There are many alternatives to Internet porn/masturbation that are healthier and less diminishing on your manhood.

Have any of you tried masturbating with just your imagination? I would consider this much healthier since you are using visualization techniques rather than training your mind to seeing the hottest, horniest porn stars doing what we fantasize about. You want to get on a woman's level? read some erotica and see if you can refrain from jerking it. Although many do watch porn, most women can use their imagination to turn themselves on. I believe this is a much healthier way to release while also expanding your mind and getting in touch with your sexuality.

I highly recommend kegel exercises. The pc muscle is your pelvic floor muscle that you squeeze when you are holding your urine in. When trained, this muscle is highly effective in men's and women's sexual health. Practicing kegels is a great way to transmute the horniness you feel down there, into a challenging but productive and benefical exercise that can help your erections among other benefits.

In my experiences, meditation is probably the most potent tool for training your mind to be present enough to refrain from hindering desires. Emotional regulation, indifference, calmness, and discipline, are just a few of the benefits that I have gained from my meditation practice (about 7 years now). Practicing meditation has been pivotal in helping me with women. I am able to control my emotions no matter what is thrown at me, and always stay cool, calm and collective. I can harness the sexual sensations I feel when I'm vibing with a girl and stay present with her. This is so valuable as a seducer.

For my seasoned playas... I am big on pics and videos of my women. I have a whole vault of pics and vids girls send me, as well as when we're together. I get a good percentage of my women to let me record our hook ups. These are vids that I go back to if I want to masturbate because It feels better on my ego knowing that it's MY **** putting in work!

The tall and short of it is that NO FAP is beneficial, but don't kill yourselves about it. Practice it, but enjoy the journey using different strategies that benefit you!

I agree with you to a point I think no fab past 7 days is highly overrated and I think p*** just like any other edition in the long term could destroy you if you don't nip it on the butt
.

 

[Snag87]

What's the consensus opinion on not watching porn but still masturbating?

 

[corrector]

What's the consensus opinion on not watching porn but still masturbating?

What is the consensus opinion on what porn is even defined as?

 

[logicallefty]

Your a police officer though. Women dig that sort of thing since it's alpha-male career. You probably have a good masculine frame in order to have taken that job. You think some short scrawny looking dude is going to become a police officer? Criminals would laugh at that.

Honestly, do you really know any cops who is struggling with women?

Actually not all women like cops. For the women and people in general who don't hate cops, then they will give you extra respect that you automatically get because of the position. In other words, you don't necessarily have to prove yourself to them as much because the position does a lot of it for you. On the other hand, there people who can't stand cops no matter what. Women and men alike. I honestly don't take it personally. There are some cops out there who are corrupt and disturbed and shouldn't be on the job. And they ruin it for the rest of us.

There is actually a cop at my old department who is probably 51, buff, masculine, and he can't get a woman to save his life. He stalks women online, sends d|ck pics, etc. and creeps them out. He is very shady. At my last department when I worked with him I even told my Sergeant not to put him and I on the schedule at the same time.. Because he was going to get me in trouble doing the shyt to people that he does. He is also not allowed in my current jurisdiction to backup any officer because of the shyt he pulls. His town and mine are like 10 miles away but he is ordered not to come down here. He has actually had the County Sheriff called on him while working in uniform as a city cop for sexually harassing women. So no, bottom line, this cop CAN NOT get a woman! He is what women call a CREEP! And there are many like him... He is bad news all the way around. Why is he still a cop? This is Illinois, the WHO YOU KNOW State!