Men afraid to approach?

[sangheilios]

I'm pretty sure you're agreeing with everything I said. You're just using examples.

The bold part is the same in my experience and I'm betting for many others. I've also said before that a lot of women don't want a guy with money, they want a guy who will SPEND his money.

I'm just adding to your point.

Yeah, I feel that women are not really attracted to money but more so the lifestyle, the thrills or even the perceived status that spending allows for. There are plenty of wealthy, or even very wealthy, individuals that live relatively normal and otherwise boring lives that don't feel the need to spend like crazy. In fact, I'd actually say that this is far more the case. Now, if you are so broke that you can't even take a girl out to eat.....that is a different problem in itself.

 

[SW15]

I've already repeated this a million times on here,but I've had women point out an obese woman and tell me that is my league, and they are saying this to a man that is 6'4" and one of the fittest guys at the gym. How do you think they view average men or those that are legitimately below average? I guarantee you they'd feel that those men are not at all worthy of dating at all.......you should be totally alarmed by the thoughts and feelings of these women.

That's totally nuts if that's the expectation now. If guys end up dumpster diving and getting rejected, that's a bad sign. Men might end up concluding no one wants them and quit approaching.

 

[sangheilios]

That's totally nuts if that's the expectation now. If guys end up dumpster diving and getting rejected, that's a bad sign. Men might end up concluding no one wants them and quit approaching.

I don't think all women are like this but I do believe it's pretty common though. A couple years back I heard this story from a guy I knew that worked at a bank that was interesting. He said that the coworkers tried setting up one of the tellers, a fat girl in her 20s, on a date with someone they knew. She went out with him and they naturally asked her about it. She made a remark that she wasn't interested in seeing him again, and of course they asked. She said that it was because he was overweight......this fat woman rejected a man that had been preselected for by her peers for being fat like her lol.

 

[biggoal]

I don't think all women are like this but I do believe it's pretty common though. A couple years back I heard this story from a guy I knew that worked at a bank that I was interesting. He said that the coworkers tried setting up one of the tellers, a fat girl in her 20s, on a date with someone they knew. She went out with him and they naturally asked her about it. She made a remark that she wasn't interested in seeing him again, and of course they asked. She said that it was because he was overweight......this fat woman rejected a man that had been preselected for by her peers for being fat like her lol.

If a friend suggested you date a fat woman would you be offended?

 

[jaymbrs]

I don't think all women are like this but I do believe it's pretty common though. A couple years back I heard this story from a guy I knew that worked at a bank that I was interesting. He said that the coworkers tried setting up one of the tellers, a fat girl in her 20s, on a date with someone they knew. She went out with him and they naturally asked her about it. She made a remark that she wasn't interested in seeing him again, and of course they asked. She said that it was because he was overweight......this fat woman rejected a man that had been preselected for by her peers for being fat like her lol.

Hearing **** like this just angers me. And I posted in the past about how A LOT of fatties hit me up on OLD. I'm in pretty good shape so to me it's insulting these broads even think they have a chance. I ignore them all.

 

[sangheilios]

If a friend suggested you date a fat woman would you be offended?

That most likely wouldn't happen but I probably wouldn't be interested. The point is that a fat woman rejected a man for being in the same physical state as her, meaning she has demands and expectations that she herself does not live up to.

 

[espanish]

you guys need to have better screening procedures.
went on FOUR dates and she wouldn't let you touch her?
date 1: kiss
date 2: touch breasts from outside clothes
no? ok bye

and those of you saying women have it easy because they have many choices because they can go on a dating app and get 400 matches, you need to understand the difference between what a man wants and what a woman wants. I was just thinking about this yesterday. men just look at a woman's legs and it's a done deal. a woman wants a guy that she likes. yes she will get 400 matches but she doesn't like any of those because they are all losers (in her eyes). if you're having trouble seeing this point of view, imagine you went outside and got approached by 400 ugly, disgusting women who smelled like pee. you reject all of them. does that mean men suck and women should stop approaching?

women are just as frustrated as men but in a different way.

 

[Robert28]

you guys need to have better screening procedures.
went on FOUR dates and she wouldn't let you touch her?
date 1: kiss
date 2: touch breasts from outside clothes
no? ok bye

and those of you saying women have it easy because they have many choices because they can go on a dating app and get 400 matches, you need to understand the difference between what a man wants and what a woman wants. I was just thinking about this yesterday. men just look at a woman's legs and it's a done deal. a woman wants a guy that she likes. yes she will get 400 matches but she doesn't like any of those because they are all losers (in her eyes). if you're having trouble seeing this point of view, imagine you went outside and got approached by 400 ugly, disgusting women who smelled like pee. you reject all of them. does that mean men suck and women should stop approaching?

women are just as frustrated as men but in a different way.

Women are frustrated because there aren’t enough Chads to go around. That’s what they’re frustrated about. They don’t care about the average guy. Which is funny because I don’t really care about them or what they want either.

 

[espanish]

Women are frustrated because there aren’t enough Chads to go around. That’s what they’re frustrated about. They don’t care about the average guy. Which is funny because I don’t really care about them or what they want either.

I dont know what chad means but i am assuming it means a low value guy who chases her
women are exactly tired of chads. she wants a manly man who will dominate her, who respects her but doesn't care what she thinks, and she cant find this man because such men are rare.
yes she can get 400 matches on tinder but all those men are chads, and that's exactly what she is tired of.

 

[corrector]

if you're having trouble seeing this point of view, imagine you went outside and got approached by 400 ugly, disgusting women who smelled like pee. you reject all of them. does that mean men suck and women should stop approaching?

women are just as frustrated as men but in a different way.

That is not helping anyone see your point of view. If you are comparing that to an average guy that is the lady's looksmatch then that is ridiculous to the nth degree. You don't even know what a Chad is? That's the type of guy who is winning in the dating market because lots of women right swipe him on Tinder because of his model looks while the "looksmatch" guy gets left swiped because as others have pointed out, women's standards are insane. That is why an analogy like that can't work.

 

[BadWatermelon]

Something I have noticed is that back in the good old days (2010-2015), it seemed like if I got a girl's number, there was about a 50% chance it would lead to a date. Now, it's maybe 10%. Most of the time I get ghosted. This is also in spite of me being older and in better shape.

 

[biggoal]

Something I have noticed is that back in the good old days (2010-2015), it seemed like if I got a girl's number, there was about a 50% chance it would lead to a date. Now, it's maybe 10%. Most of the time I get ghosted. This is also in spite of me being older and in better shape.

A lot of factors. Before Covid on OLD I'd say there was a lot higher chance than that. I'd weed a lot of them out via facebook when I looked them up, but yea, before Covid it was fairly easy after a few replies to get her number. I'd say 70 percent of the time I coudl get their number after chatting a bit and even rejected dates too.

Others on here complaining about OLD since Covid about the selection and harder to get dates as well from online. Pre covid OLD was still not very good, but heck of a lot more women on there than there is now and it was easy to chat them up.

 

[espanish]

That is not helping anyone see your point of view. If you are comparing that to an average guy that is the lady's looksmatch then that is ridiculous to the nth degree. You don't even know what a Chad is? That's the type of guy who is winning in the dating market because lots of women right swipe him on Tinder because of his model looks while the "looksmatch" guy gets left swiped because as others have pointed out, women's standards are insane. That is why an analogy like that can't work.

ok jesus excuse me for not knowing a stupid slang term.
I don't care about tinder because that's not real life. I am talking strictly real life.
in real life, a girl wants a guy who is masculine, self-made, self-assured, who can dominate her. most men today are feminine. go listen to adam sandler without looking at him. you'd think it's either a woman or a 5 year old kid talking. go listen to justin bieber talking. sounds like a woman. zero testosterone. zero body hair.
but I agree with you that women today have very unrealistic expectations. like a fat girl expecting to marry a successful good-looking doctor.

 

[corrector]

excuse me for not knowing a stupid slang term.

That is a well known term here that is in virtually most threads dealing with OLD.

I don't care about tinder because that's not real life. I am talking strictly real life.

Tinder (and OLD in general) is part of real life because most women and guys are plugged into it. Even if you don't use it, women have unrealistic expectations (a point you said you agreed with me) and that's because of Tinder/OLD. If an ugly fat woman or undesirable woman can still get lots of matches on OLD including Chads who want an easy-time and end up spoiling them, then that's going to spill-over in real life. You can be cold-approaching a woman and she can be right-swiping chads on tinder and she's already left-swipped hundreds and thousands of guys who look like you already, how do you think that cold-approach is going to go?

 

[AfricanPython]

I feel experiences that men like @Robert28 are actually quite common, I can relate to much of what he is saying. I had a string of experiences of getting single dates not progressing further, numbers that lead to flaked out dates, etc. Given enough experiences like this, you can start having some internal issues going on with your self-confidence. Before I started posting on here I thought I was an outlier, as I had no idea if this was going on with other men or not. The reality is that most men are not going to be open with consistent failures like this, I don't have to explain why that is.

Something that is quite real though is that women have a ridiculous degree of access to men and have tons of them lined up, this even goes for fatties and ugly women. There was an obese woman I knew a couple years ago, I'm talking average height and well over 200 pounds, that had a couple dozen men hitting her up on her phone on a regular basis. I can cite a few other known examples like this and it gives a good picture of how the dating market is functioning. I also can cite several examples of women who openly admitted to leading men on for simply attention, this is very common and I've personally experienced this. I also can cite some examples of women admitting to using men to go on dates, they may do this for a free drink or activity or even just using the men to just have something to do so that they aren't sitting bored at home. The problem with this is these women are literally just using these men that they may have little to no interest in. Again, this type of stuff is far more common than most of us would care to admit or even realize.

With all of this said, not all women are like this but learning how to spot these red flags is fairly easy once you've experienced it. One of the issues though is that many men are in a state of (extreme)scarcity when it comes to the opposite sex, so the natural tendency is to chase. It's really not a great dating market for young men today and quite unfortunate that they have to experience this. You know this is a major issue when there are tons of youtube channels dedicated to this that have countless views. I've already repeated this a million times on here, but I've had women point out an obese woman and tell me that is my league, and they are saying this to a man that is 6'4" and one of the fittest guys at the gym. How do you think they view average men or those that are legitimately below average? I guarantee you they'd feel that those men are not at all worthy of dating at all.......you should be totally alarmed by the thoughts and feelings of these women.

Very true

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I notice old guys have way more confidence and no inhibitions when it comes to approaching. I saw this 50 year old Anglo straight up flirting with the 22 year old German bartender while all the guys my age just sat silently watching.

I do that and I don't know anything about mustache swag #whenMenWereStillMen!

 

[espanish]

That is a well known term here that is in virtually most threads dealing with OLD.
Tinder (and OLD in general) is part of real life because most women and guys are plugged into it. Even if you don't use it, women have unrealistic expectations (a point you said you agreed with me) and that's because of Tinder/OLD. If an ugly fat woman or undesirable woman can still get lots of matches on OLD including Chads who want an easy-time and end up spoiling them, then that's going to spill-over in real life. You can be cold-approaching a woman and she can be right-swiping chads on tinder and she's already left-swipped hundreds and thousands of guys who look like you already, how do you think that cold-approach is going to go?

ok i see what you mean.

 

[user252009]

Never hesitate and always take the shot.

You never forget or regret the shots you take and hit, but on the other hand you will regret those shots you never took for the test of your life.
Don't think, just act upon it instead.

This video assumes that the girl has interest in the first place - for 99% of women out there today, they do not. You can be as confident as you want, if you don't catch her eye (and with women's attitude of not wanting to be approached except if you're a Chad from the get-go), it's not going to work. I've approached both when I felt confident and not, didn't make much of a difference.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

These days I need a clear cut IOI before I approach. If there's none, I don't bother.

I used to feel the same. However, as a test case. I recently approached a woman at a bar who was giving no IOIs and it went well. So, I’m no longer holding that as a Hard rule.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Not afraid, I overcame my AA after my hundreds of approaches. But it’s just not wanting to waste time. I know it won’t go anywhere. Never did no matter what pua advice I tried