Should I drop my main plate?(UPDATE: Dropped)

[Chubb46]

@Chubb46 - before this night began did you tell yourself "hey I think I will go on SoSuave tonight and just be a contrarian to literally every poster on there"? I mean I have to admit you have been entertaining - in a good way.

I add the seasonings to the bland advice from some , i advocate spinning wheels not plates. Thats my motto SWNP...ah snap.. a new revolution has been born

 

[Igetit!]

Well...I mean OK...so she has things to do after work...what about before? What's stopping her from coming over and cooking breakfast with me? Maybe taking a quick shower with me? I mean there is always a way to see someone if you really want to.

EXACTLY.

Same thing happened with the girl I was seeing. She was busy,busy,busy....always busy. (Not in the beginning,though). I altered my behavior towards her,just became more flirty,more sexual here and there,re-generated a little chemistry in her.....then all of the sudden,she "magically" found time to see me.

She was in college at the time. I stayed in walking distance of the college. Her classes started at 8am. After I re-ignited some chemistry in her,she'd come over to my place at 7:30am. Hug,kiss,talk,make out for a few minutes,then she'd be off to class.


There's NO SUCH THING as "too busy". If she REALLY WANTED to see you,she'd MAKE THE TIME to see you.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Too much communication. Shouldn’t be chatting it up with a chick this much without exclusivity. Withdraw for a week. No contact.

Here's my experience after spinning plates for some time now.

Plates have a shorter shelf life than exclusive relationships.

After awhile, she wants more and you aren't all the way invested and she senses it. It was okay for a few months and then after awhile, she starts to think shes wasting her time when she could be in a serious relationship.

That's been my experience.

Best of luck man.

I agree with this. If a plate isn’t asking for exclusivity after the first few bangs you aren’t running a tight enough ship.

 

[Lookatu]

You've been going out with her for 5 months and where's the communication?

Best Advice: COMMUNICATE with her. Communicating with us isn't going to do you no good. You need to communicate with her.

Just send out a quick barometer reading: "Hey, I just want a quick barometer reading and want to know if everything is ok with you? I noticed things seem a bit off lately."

She'll either spill the beans or give you an answer so you can be at peace.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Just send out a quick barometer reading: "Hey, I just want a quick barometer reading and want to know if everything is ok with you? I noticed things seem a bit off lately."

No, please don’t ever send that text. Any disagreements should be handled in person or at minimum in extenuating circumstances over a phone call. If she isn’t answering the phone or returning a you have bigger problems. The game is already over.

 

[Lookatu]

No, please don’t ever send that text. Any disagreements should be handled in person or at minimum in extenuating circumstances over a phone call. If she isn’t answering the phone or returning a you have bigger problems. The game is already over.

Oh, you're one of those that need to iron out any serious issues over phone or in person. Different strokes for different folks.
People communicate in different ways. If she's the phone call or in person type, then yes I agree he should do it that way.
I'm fluid and do what is conducive with the other person depending on their preference.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Oh, you're one of those that need to iron out any serious issues over phone or in person. Different strokes for different folks.

Texting is not suitable for serious conversation. There is no body language or tonality. Furthermore, anything sent via text is written evidence that can and will be used against you.

People communicate in different ways. If she's the phone call or in person type, then yes I agree he should do it that way.
I'm fluid and do what is conducive with the other person depending on their preference.

I strongly disagree with that mindset in a man-woman relationship context. She must follow your lead, not vice versa. Effective communication is not done via text when compared to in person or the telephone for any human on this planet, due to our species strong inclination towards non-verbal cues.

Young lads like myself refer to this as “vibing.”

 

[Chubb46]

Oh, you're one of those that need to iron out any serious issues over phone or in person. Different strokes for different folks.
People communicate in different ways. If she's the phone call or in person type, then yes I agree he should do it that way.
I'm fluid and do what is conducive with the other person depending on their preference.

I concur

 

[Barrister]

You've been going out with her for 5 months and where's the communication?

Best Advice: COMMUNICATE with her. Communicating with us isn't going to do you no good. You need to communicate with her.

Just send out a quick barometer reading: "Hey, I just want a quick barometer reading and want to know if everything is ok with you? I noticed things seem a bit off lately."

She'll either spill the beans or give you an answer so you can be at peace.

This is good advice for an LTR. He said she was a plate though (although the fact he is posting this shows he cares a little more about her than her just being a plate). For a plate I don't think he owes her what you are suggesting.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This is good advice for an LTR. He said she was a plate though (although the fact he is posting this shows he cares a little more about her than her just being a plate). For a plate I don't think he owes her what you are suggesting.

I think the lines are kinda blurred. I don't typically sleep at a plates house regularly, allow them to sleep at mine or have toothbrushes over there...

She seems like she has her act together and is mostly low maintenance and drama free. I definitely consider her to have long term potential.

 

[Gstring]

Why do you care about anything if you call her "a plate". And if you see things possibly long term why would you date other women?
Women aren't stupid and can read men, maybe she knows you see other women, honestly who would put effort into a thoughtful gesture for your birthday.. knowing that.Just being honest. women aren't plates, they are women. That word needs to be removed from the program.

Wow, what a load of bs.

First of all, girl has to ask to be exclusive. It's the ultimate test on her interest. If our guy asks her first, he will never know her true intentions.
https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/never-ask-to-become-exclusive.16097/

@BackInTheGame78
She's a plate and you have to snap out of bs you thinking - otherwise you wouldn't be asking this.
She hasn't proposed to you to be exclusive = she does not have enough interest in you. You are her plate. She is doing a pull back, stop seeing things differently. Either you she noticed you like her - which is possible since you two are texting back and forth all day long - or you haven't proposed to her so she looking for a new job candidate. You can't be serious about chasing this tail with her trailer, lul.
Do what a true pimp does, put her into sexzone. Don't drop her. Sexzone, your version of friend zone..

Let her booty call you.

Show her you have other options with your actions.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Wow, what a load of bs.

First of all, girl has to ask to be exclusive. It's the ultimate test on her interest. If our guy asks her first, he will never know her true intentions.
https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/never-ask-to-become-exclusive.16097/

@BackInTheGame78
She's a plate and you have to snap out of bs you thinking - otherwise you wouldn't be asking this.
She hasn't proposed to you to be exclusive = she does not have enough interest in you. You are her plate. She is doing a pull back, stop seeing things differently. Either you she noticed you like her - which is possible since you two are texting back and forth all day long - or you haven't proposed to her so she looking for a new job candidate. You can't be serious about chasing this tail with her trailer, lul.
Do what a true pimp does, put her into sexzone. Don't drop her. Sexzone, your version of friend zone..

Let her booty call you.

Show her you have other options with your actions.

Texting all day long? Not sure how texting 2 or 3 times over a 14 hour period with multiple hours in between qualifies as "all day long" as if we are sending 50 texts a day but OK...

 

[Gstring]

Texting all day long? Not sure how texting 2 or 3 times over a 14 hour period with multiple hours in between qualifies as "all day long" as if we are sending 50 texts a day but OK...

You doing it every day. You're not even letting her miss you. She even has tooth brush for you at her place.

 

[Barrister]

I think the lines are kinda blurred. I don't typically sleep at a plates house regularly, allow them to sleep at mine or have toothbrushes over there...

She seems like she has her act together and is mostly low maintenance and drama free. I definitely consider her to have long term potential.

@BackInTheGame78

Has she ever actually asked you for exclusivity?

 

[Lookatu]

Texting is not suitable for serious conversation. There is no body language or tonality. Furthermore, anything sent via text is written evidence that can and will be used against you.



I strongly disagree with that mindset in a man-woman relationship context. She must follow your lead, not vice versa. Effective communication is not done via text when compared to in person or the telephone for any human on this planet, due to our species strong inclination towards non-verbal cues.

Young lads like myself refer to this as “vibing.”

Texting is all my plates get. I don't owe them any more than that. I don't need for them to waste my time any further.

If they are gf's or LTR potentials, I will communicate accordingly that's best suited to what we are both comfortable with. There's no written rule or wrong or right here.

 

[Lookatu]

Texting all day long? Not sure how texting 2 or 3 times over a 14 hour period with multiple hours in between qualifies as "all day long" as if we are sending 50 texts a day but OK...

I think you're playing a charade if you are texting her a couple times a day and you aren't bringing up something that is bothering you. Grow some balls and communicate with her on what's bothering you. Don't be a pvssy and avoid stressful situations. My $.02

 

[BackInTheGame78]

@BackInTheGame78

Has she ever actually asked you for exclusivity?

No, but really none of my other LTRs ever have either...they just end up being assumed at some point.

 

[EyeBRollin]

No, but really none of my other LTRs ever have either...they just end up being assumed at some point.

Something is not good in the hood. Women always ask men they really like for exclusivity. Usually it comes indirectly using woman-ese like “where do you see this going?”

 

[Chubb46]

This is good advice for an LTR. He said she was a plate though (although the fact he is posting this shows he cares a little more about her than her just being a plate). For a plate I don't think he owes her what you are suggesting.

Omg.. people fall in love with plates, i have a china set i just adore. I don't spin them because they might fall and break. They are also not microwave safe

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Something is not good in the hood. Women always ask men they really like for exclusivity. Usually it comes indirectly using woman-ese like “where do you see this going?”

I mean I have had them come out and tell me they aren't seeing anyone else and aren't interested in seeing anyone else and then ask if I was seeing anyone other than them. But I have never had them sit down and have the talk with me.