Pretty sure a girl im seeing gas lighting me

[zinc4]

Just wanted to get some thoughts. Im an white American in the Domincuan Rebublic seeing a very attractive Venezuelan girl who is 27 or so.

It started out as a just meeting at bars drinking type of thing has progressed to go on small trips and her just coming over to chill with a movie or something.

However things have moved very fast in less than 2 months. She has helped me very sick a few times and been good in many ways.

But.....she always talks **** in front of me like its no big deal in a casual manner about American whites because she works in a call center for Samsung and has to deal with their complaining. Shes well teavelled though to the US and parts of Europe and very liberal and blames whites for problems in the us and alwsys cites slavery and why blm is important. It starts arguments because i tell her to stfu about American polutics when she has no clue regardless of how much she reads or watches the news.

Im strongly conservative btw. So another thing red flag she has tonnes of guy friends who i tell her i disagree with the whole multiple guy thing and says most guys only like to deal with women they want to sleep with. This is not because of any feelings of jealously i just sincerely believe its bull**** and always a red flag when a girl has mostly only guy friends and calls them her best friends who live her yada yada.

So 1 night her guy friend picks us up after curfew here because he has a special past curfew license so we could get home. We go to get in and she hops in the front seat speaking spanish with me in the back seat. So i didnt act angry or raise my voice but i calmy told her to tell her friend to drop her off at her place not mine. So she gets upset jumps in the back seat with me and says you need to tell me when something i do upsets you and not do something drastic. We argued a bit and then she said she understood so i let her go back with me.

Fast forwards the next day and a few days later she keeps bringing it up and says her guy friends are her real friends and to come to her roomates burthday party to meet most of her guy friends there and see they are her real friends.

I told her no would rather not and gets very dissapointined acting even upset to which she denied she was.

And in general a lot of stuff like the white people comments which are everytime we hang out....she also is disrespectful in other ways.

Anyways she left my place this morning and wanted to meet this Friday and go to the beach on Saturday. I reluctantly said i would be up for beach on sat not hang out friday.

But now i dont really want to see her anymore I feel bad because to nights ago she said she has completely fallen for me. So how to break the ice to her i just dont enjoy her company anymore. Its gotten to the point im tired of feeling offended or disrespected by her. But she professes her feelings for me. Kind of a mind****.

 

[zinc4]

It doesn't sound like gaslighting to me, unless I'm mistaken. Just that some of her behaviors annoy the shyt out of you, lol.

If you're not cool with her having "guy friends" and also her political talk, you just have to take an honest inventory and decide if she's worth the trouble. Every girl will have some thing or another we don't like, but it's up to us to decide whether they're deal breakers or not.

My personal opinion, based on your stories, is you sound a little sensitive, though I could be off the mark. BUT if it's something that she does repeatedly, then yeah, I could see that getting on my nerves, too.

FWIW most non-Americans like to bytch about America, it's just part of the deal, but most also tend to love other things about it. I just let that stuff roll of my back.

She specifically trash talks white people and openly admits to he racist against them. How am i being too sensitive? I would never tell a Chinese girl im dating im racist against chinese then blame them for everything. And says black lives matter protestors rooting and starting fires is a good thing because white people deserve it lmao. Stupid asf but fluent in 5 languages.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Are you sure these are not cultural differences you don't understand?

 

[zinc4]

Are you sure these are not cultural differences you don't understand?

Don't think so... she is very educated and well travelled. She deems herself an expert on American pop culture, culture in general and politics. Got an extreme know it all attitude.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Just wanted to get some thoughts. Im an white American in the Domincuan Rebublic seeing a very attractive Venezuelan girl who is 27 or so.

It started out as a just meeting at bars drinking type of thing has progressed to go on small trips and her just coming over to chill with a movie or something.

However things have moved very fast in less than 2 months. She has helped me very sick a few times and been good in many ways.

But.....she always talks **** in front of me like its no big deal in a casual manner about American whites because she works in a call center for Samsung and has to deal with their complaining. Shes well teavelled though to the US and parts of Europe and very liberal and blames whites for problems in the us and alwsys cites slavery and why blm is important. It starts arguments because i tell her to stfu about American polutics when she has no clue regardless of how much she reads or watches the news.

Right... She has no clue, and making a whole lotta assumptions.

Im strongly conservative btw. So another thing red flag she has tonnes of guy friends who i tell her i disagree with the whole multiple guy thing and says most guys only like to deal with women they want to sleep with. This is not because of any feelings of jealously i just sincerely believe its bull**** and always a red flag when a girl has mostly only guy friends and calls them her best friends who live her yada yada.

Yep. The truth.

So 1 night her guy friend picks us up after curfew here because he has a special past curfew license so we could get home. We go to get in and she hops in the front seat speaking spanish with me in the back seat. So i didnt act angry or raise my voice but i calmy told her to tell her friend to drop her off at her place not mine. So she gets upset jumps in the back seat with me and says you need to tell me when something i do upsets you and not do something drastic. We argued a bit and then she said she understood so i let her go back with me.

Fast forwards the next day and a few days later she keeps bringing it up and says her guy friends are her real friends and to come to her roomates burthday party to meet most of her guy friends there and see they are her real friends.

I told her no would rather not and gets very dissapointined acting even upset to which she denied she was.

She has no clue.

And in general a lot of stuff like the white people comments which are everytime we hang out....she also is disrespectful in other ways.

She "grouped" you and made assumptions about you man.

Anyways she left my place this morning and wanted to meet this Friday and go to the beach on Saturday. I reluctantly said i would be up for beach on sat not hang out friday.

But now i dont really want to see her anymore I feel bad because to nights ago she said she has completely fallen for me. So how to break the ice to her i just dont enjoy her company anymore. Its gotten to the point im tired of feeling offended or disrespected by her. But she professes her feelings for me. Kind of a mind****.

Probably cause you pulled back cause you was getting offended. Some folks are insecure and they do this bull to attack you because of how they feel. It's backwards, but it's why they do it.

 

[EyeBRollin]

They don’t change.

Accept how she is or find someone new.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

All right, bro, you didn't get into specifics about it in your original post. Who cares though? You're being sensitive now. And actually I was referring more to the car ride, anyway. AND I said I could be wrong. But it's nothing to get worked up about...she has retarded opinions, big deal.

If you don't like her, dump her. Why are you dating a racist? Simple fix.

If you can't handle being with a super hot woman than don't be OP. Go be with a less attractive women who doesn't have guy friends. I understand why you have concerns but you also seem insecure as in you believe she could do better than you.

 

[zinc4]

If you can't handle being with a super hot woman than don't be OP. Go be with a less attractive women who doesn't have guy friends. I understand why you have concerns but you also seem insecure as in you believe she could do better than you.

Dude wtf. No i dont feel like she could do better. Its got nothing to do with that. Its about respect and boundaries. I feel like i can way better hence why i want to stop seeing her. Only simps assume a woman is high quality based on looks alone.

You are coming from a low mindset perspective.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

They don’t change.

Accept how she is or find someone new.

She'll keep chipping at him. If he got into a relationship she'd be working on bringing him down.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

If you can't handle being with a super hot woman than don't be OP. Go be with a less attractive women who doesn't have guy friends. I understand why you have concerns but you also seem insecure as in you believe she could do better than you.

Just cause she's physically attractive doesn't mean you have to be treated like crap.

 

[7onriverI f]

Tell her you wanna be her friend not boyfriend.

 

[zinc4]

She'll keep chipping at him. If he got into a relationship she'd be working on bringing him down.

Yeah after spending the last 2 days with her i felt an extreme sense of unhappiness and toxicity this morning and was just asking myself why potentially put yourself through this anymore? Honeymoon period is over.

 

[zinc4]

Tell her you wanna be her friend not boyfriend.

I thought about this actually.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Yeah after spending the last 2 days with her i felt an extreme sense of unhappiness and toxicity this morning and was just asking myself why potentially put yourself through this anymore? Honeymoon period is over.

Don't do it.... Before you were as experienced you mightve doubled down on your efforts to make her happy. We know that doesn't work.

 

[Lookatu]

Just wanted to get some thoughts. Im an white American in the Domincuan Rebublic seeing a very attractive Venezuelan girl who is 27 or so.

Shes well teavelled though to the US and parts of Europe and very liberal and blames whites for problems in the us and alwsys cites slavery and why blm is important. It starts arguments because i tell her to stfu about American polutics when she has no clue regardless of how much she reads or watches the news.

So another thing red flag she has tonnes of guy friends

I'm going to be talking about everything I bolded.

If you are white and in the DR, you should not be seeing any spoiled and entitled brat. There are way more women that have come from nothing or more grounded that can treat you way better. Especially the overflow of Venezuelans fleeing their country, there's no shortage of young, hot Venezuelan girls that will treat you like a king and don't have an entitled attitude.

It sounds like she's young, naive, misguided, ignorant. Around that age, they always think they know everything and she's not going to think any other way no matter what you say to her or debate her on.

Tons of guy friends is always a red flag and you're a cuck if you hang out with them in anyway IMO.

You need to have a shorter fuse and put them in their place ASAP, especially with any girls from South America. This type of machismo attitude is what they expect or else you are just viewed as weak.

 

[7onriverI f]

I thought about this actually.

Do you have anything that you actually like about her? She's into BLM and talking about how whites have slaves. Does she know blacks had slaves as well in other countries around the world at certain points in time?

I would be interested in talking about these sort of things with a chick or a guy. Your clearly not.

What do you even like about her dude besides her looks?

 

[zinc4]

Do you have anything that you actually like about her? She's into BLM and talking about how whites have slaves. Does she know blacks had slaves as well in other countries around the world at certain points in time?

I would be interested in talking about these sort of things with a chick or a guy. Your clearly not.

What do you even like about her dude besides her looks?

She knows that man. There is no logical talking to her. Just white man bad, black people victims, cnn and american leftist news good. Everything is a racist and political agenda with her. Trust me it's not fun stuff to talk about past 1 date.

I like that she helped me when i was sick. She is fun to drink with when she isnt bringing that stuff up. But the more i get to know her the less i like. Now im just looking for an exit that wont be too hard on her.

 

[7onriverI f]

She knows that man. There is no logical talking to her. Just white man bad, black people victims, cnn and american leftist news good. Everything is a racist and political agenda with her. Trust me it's not fun stuff to talk about past 1 date.

I like that she helped me when i was sick. She is fun to drink with when she isnt bringing that stuff up. But the more i get to know her the less i like. Now im just looking for an exit that wont be too hard on her.

Lol a black man can't be racist by law I have heard. There was a ruling on that. So shes right only white people can be racist. still i question that as well and doing a google search on the matter.

 

[zinc4]

Lol a black man can't be racist by law I have heard. There was a ruling on that. So shes right only white people can be racist. still i question that as well and doing a google search on the matter.

Racism is a state of mind. Shes racist asf and im tired of dealing with her. And lots of openly black and white racists in America especially with all the recent BLM tensions. I realize that its the cool and "woke" thing to trash abd **** talk white males in todays society but that doesn't mean i will tolerate it right in my face by someone im dating.

 

[7onriverI f]

Racism is a state of mind. Shes racist asf and im tired of dealing with her. And lots of openly black and white racists in America especially with all the recent BLM tensions. I realize that its the cool and "woke" thing to trash abd **** talk white males in todays society but that doesn't mean i will tolerate it right in my face by someone im dating.

She's getting offended your getting offended. It's a total piss off contest between ya's.

Find someone you wanna talk to.