Need some advice...

[Atom Smasher]

The first question is whether or not to do it in person or via text. That's a little hard to discern from your situation. If you tell her in person, then presumably she has already made the decision because she's moving her stuff out.

Whatever you decide, via text or in-person, I would simple say "I think it's best that we go our separate ways. Thanks for the years together and I wish you all the best."

The thing that must be missing is emotion. You must control yourself with every fiber of your being and be cool as a cucumber. You must be cryptic, a rock. You've decided this yourself and that's what you're sticking with. Be emotional by yourself if you wish, but not in front of her.

In this way you will completely flip the script and she will be shocked and question what's wrong with her, as I mentioned above. Right now she thinks of herself as holding all the cards. I'm not saying she's malicious, just in control. You need to agree with her that it's time to go and be resolute.

IMPORTANT:
No explanations, no emotion, no going over the past, none of that. NO LONG CONVERSATIONS. You WILL lose if you do that. Just inform her of your decision and be cordial but resolute. She will be shocked by your strength and control, humbled, and will question herself. Then go ghost. That means do not reach out to her. Let her stew in things for a while.

 

[mozarto.o]

We've come too long , I feel this will take years to rebound from. It will suck for years

This is not a valid reason. Leave her and stop deceiving yourself. What you don´t realize is that it will suck a lot more in the future.

 

[gsintx]

Thanks Atom Smasher, much appreciated. yeah for some reason she balked and didnt want to move her stuff out ... women are weird.

The first question is whether or not to do it in person or via text. That's a little hard to discern from your situation. If you tell her in person, then presumably she has already made the decision because she's moving her stuff out.

Whatever you decide, via text or in-person, I would simple say "I think it's best that we go our separate ways. Thanks for the years together and I wish you all the best."

The thing that must be missing is emotion. You must control yourself with every fiber of your being and be cool as a cucumber. You must be cryptic, a rock. You've decided this yourself and that's what you're sticking with. Be emotional by yourself if you wish, but not in front of her.

In this way you will completely flip the script and she will be shocked and question what's wrong with her, as I mentioned above. Right now she thinks of herself as holding all the cards. I'm not saying she's malicious, just in control. You need to agree with her that it's time to go and be resolute.

IMPORTANT:
No explanations, no emotion, no going over the past, none of that. NO LONG CONVERSATIONS. You WILL lose if you do that. Just inform her of your decision and be cordial but resolute. She will be shocked by your strength and control, humbled, and will question herself. Then go ghost. That means do not reach out to her. Let her stew in things for a while.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Unless she is paying rent, you can leave it at a mutual friends place, drop it off (when she's not a round) outside her place or leave it outside your place.

Don't be surprised if she later responds that something "is missing" or asks if she "left something".

Make sure you pack everything and do not oblige her in any post-break up conversation.

It's natural that you'll miss her. Trust me (and others that have been there) . It's best to walk away and not look back.

 

[gsintx]

she pays rent. haha. thanks for your response btw

Unless she is paying rent, you can leave it at a mutual friends place, drop it off (when she's not a round) outside her place or leave it outside your place.

Don't be surprised if she later responds that something "is missing" or asks if she "left something".

Make sure you pack everything and do not oblige her in any post-break up conversation.

It's natural that you'll miss her. Trust me (and others that have been there) . It's best to walk away and not look back.

 

[gsintx]

hers

Her friend? Or your friend?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Thats a deal breaker. Nohealthy woman qould let her friend fck with your relationship. Especially if she had to crawl under barbed wire for it.
I dont all the details but this girls sounds like she doesn't have high self esteem.

The more info he gives the more this honestly sounds like a fvcked up relationship that people look at and are like wtf??

 

[Atom Smasher]

So how are you going to handle this?

 

[gsintx]

What makes you think I probably won't heed your word? haha

This is absolute garbage contrivance. Her putting all that on you is a symptom of a woman who is not in it. Infidelity. You absolutely cannot fix this.

Your “therapist” sided with you? Well he/she can see things that you can’t. Not that I believe that the therapist can fix anything. LOL
It just means the therapist isn’t blind.

If a man has a woman that is his significant other and she hangs out with slvts? He has zero chance of anything. There are behaviors that the social structure makes ok for women that lead to infidelity. It’s no accident. It is designed that way. It supports her dualistic sexual nature.

Just here to tell you that there’s also a lot more in your post. I can tell you to cut your losses and go forth but I know you probably won’t. So see it to the bitter brutal end. Just remember, it will be on you and accept the responsibility of your actions. Blame nothing on her or others from this point on.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

If you are emotionally attached to this woman, you have male biology. This is a huge emotional investment for men. Very, very dangerous.

If you were not, you would have kicked her to the curb. Thus all this stuff sounds good and is true, but you are a man and you will try to solve it.

I wish that when a woman has an affair or cheats, that men had the gift of looking into her head and seeing everything she does with the guy. Instant cure.

He might vomit... I think that'll stop him from being stupid for life

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Vomiting would be good. After three or four women he will solidly know. Just one woman? Lol

People will tell him it was just THAT woman and he would buy into it like a programmed man does. It would take a few more than one. Men are so gullible in this stage.

Is it something he did? Is it all women doing this or just most? What can he do with this information going forward?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

He has to learn by reflection and understanding. As you know right in this thread is a good start.

His main issue is he is programmed. Start there. He can throw as much stuff over the top of it over years and it won’t make a difference. Start with “the rational male” for a primer. This is pure “science” as I could not find even an article that proves the “science” wrong.

A man does all kinds of things wrong because of his thinking. Trying to pick a handful doesn’t work. De-programming himself is the true milestone. Just throwing data on top of it is actually worse.

There is not one thing in present society that is true when it comes to relationship dynamics. Women are the worst possible beings at relationships. They talk about them a lot yet are absolute failures at it. A woman has virtually no value she can add to this relationship stuff.

In another significant speaker on the subject mentioned a point I've NEVER heard not even once mentioned. You know how they are saying men are going "on strike" or 'giving up on relationships?". It's said that reality is women GAVE UP on it decades ago. This is why we are were we are today. All women obviously didn't give up on it, but a majority according to this viewpoint.

 

[gsintx]

Thanks everyone!

 

[gsintx]

So how are you going to handle this?

Sorry missed this message. we have a therapy session set for today. i was going to bang her afterwards. what do you think?

 

[Lookatu]

Sorry missed this message. we have a therapy session set for today. i was going to bang her afterwards. what do you think?

Man, I don't know and don't really believe in couples therapy sessions personally. I feel therapy is something that is usually initiated by the females and part of that female narrative to somehow change or brainwash you into being or behaving like someone you're not. And because this is pretty much a band-aid if you ever get to this point, you are just delaying the inevitable until one of you comes to that realization.

You already went once without good results. What makes you think it's going to be different this time?

 

[gsintx]

we're trying a different therapist. Also i know of a friend... his wife/ and him go to therapy and theyve been merried for a while now

Man, I don't know and don't really believe in couples therapy sessions personally. I feel therapy is something that is usually initiated by the females and part of that female narrative to somehow change or brainwash you into being or behaving like someone you're not. And because this is pretty much a band-aid if you ever get to this point, you are just delaying the inevitable until one of you comes to that realization.

You already went once without good results. What makes you think it's going to be different this time?

 

[Lookatu]

we're trying a different therapist. Also i know of a friend... his wife/ and him go to therapy and theyve been merried for a while now

People stay married for various reasons. It doesn't mean they are both the happiest they can be. Some also are brainwashed, especially if both people are blue pilled and wanna try for that Disney Dream.

The exception is that couples therapy could work if it's just a break down in communications and expression and both parties suck at it and need help. In that case, they are more or less seeking a communicator/moderator which anyone can do.

But either way, keep us updated.

 

[gsintx]

Thanks a bunch! Based off my original post, what does it look like to you?

People stay married for various reasons. It doesn't mean they are both the happiest they can be. Some also are brainwashed, especially if both people are blue pilled and wanna try for that Disney Dream.

The exception is that couples therapy could work if it's just a break down in communications and expression and both parties suck at it and need help. In that case, they are more or less seeking a communicator/moderator which anyone can do.

But either way, keep us updated.

 

[Focal core]

Man, I don't know and don't really believe in couples therapy sessions personally. I feel therapy is something that is usually initiated by the females and part of that female narrative to somehow change or brainwash you into being or behaving like someone you're not. And because this is pretty much a band-aid if you ever get to this point, you are just delaying the inevitable until one of you comes to that realization.

You already went once without good results. What makes you think it's going to be different this time?

You cant negotiate desire, this one will ultimately fail. Everyone are telling him to backoff for a while and he keep suplicating her even more. we guys told him it will fail again and again, i foresee this going to be end bad, once she's done grooming his replacement, shes gone.

 

[Atom Smasher]

You cant negotiate desire, this one will ultimately fail. Everyone are telling him to backoff for a while and he keep suplicating her even more. we guys told him it will fail again and again, i foresee this going to be end bad, once she's done grooming his replacement, shes gone.

Agreed. We’ve all been in that place where we had to learn the hard way, and that’s where he finds himself now. He has to throw the Hail Mary. After this thing resolves, the things we told him will take root.