How to gain a woman's interest back and not be boring

[ayydrewski]

This is a rare situation for me but I found a girl at work who was showing high signs of interest in me. We exchanged numbers and the next day she hit me right up. We talked over the phone through texting a bit over the next couple of days, and when I realized she wanted to see me I suggested a day and she was open to it. Before I hung out with her she wanted me to do a favors for her i.e. teaching her the type of work that I do, but she also hinted to sexual desires. Leading up to the day we kept talking and she kept asking when and where we will meet. The day that I met her I showed her some of my work that I do, but this didn't last long. The time I spent with her was fun and engaging. I was laid back and we talked a lot. Towards the end of this "date" I pulled up a show for us to watch. I tried to make a move by kissing her on her neck and rubbing her shoulder which I think she liked, but that is the farthest I went. Once the day ended I realized I messed up because she wanted to go farther and had high interest. She wanted to hangout the next day too but I suggested to hangout next week because I didn't want to be too available which she was open to. We text back and forth everyday and any more favors i.e. help with her sons homework I have tried to turn down. We go back and forth texting each other good morning but as of the last few days I see she has been growing distant. I have been giving her a lot of my non-sexual attention and responding back to her too fast sometimes. I suggested another day to meet with her this week over the phone on Saturday and she gave me the "let me see whats going on, well see". As of Monday today she has pulled back significantly and has stopped responding to me. I don't have my own place so I also had to work around that.

1. Should I go cold turkey and disappear for a couple of days/weeks.
2. If I continue to talk to her, how do I limit my non-sexual attention and text her without being too boring?
3. With situation like this is a second chance possible?

 

[MrWood]

1. Should I go cold turkey and disappear for a couple of days/weeks

 

[ayydrewski]

Thank you for that, but I feel at this point moving forward she's faking high interest just to get my attention. Whats the best way to combat that?

 

[ayydrewski]

For what does she want your attention?

Since I havent sealed the deal with her the first day we hung out she might have viewed that as a loss for her. Now she uses me for non-sexual attention while she has other guys on the side. That could be the case?

 

[ayydrewski]

And, you've attempted to close, since?

Yes in the very first post I invited her out for a second time and she said we'll see. She replies with one word answers when I ask her how shes doing but asks me questions time to time about my day. Should I just next her, especially if I dont have good game?

 

[Ohso-Phresh]

Yes in the very first post I invited her out for a second time and she said we'll see. She replies with one word answers when I ask her how shes doing but asks me questions time to time about my day. Should I just next her, especially if I dont have good game?

She’s moved on with other guys. You were too timid and took too long.

You’re boring, work on yourself and build an interesting life. And by all means explore other women.

 

[ayydrewski]

She’s moved on with other guys. You were too timid and took too long.

You’re boring, work on yourself and build an interesting life. And by all means explore other women.

She definitely does have other guys around her since she's told me she talks to them. In this case I should just stop talking to her completely? I feel like I'm a puppet to her now and nothing I can do will get things back on track from our initial spark. Also shes in her mid 30s so do they think differently at that age? She said she doesnt want any man in her life hinting for casual relationships

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She definitely does have other guys around her since she's told me she talks to them. In this case I should just stop talking to her completely? I feel like I'm a puppet to her now and nothing I can do will get things back on track from our initial spark. Also shes in her mid 30s so do they think differently at that age? She said she doesnt want any man in her life hinting for casual relationships

When your in this position of not being sure or trying to manage yourself so as to increase her desire the best bet is to pull most if your attention and start spending more time and fvcking a woman who is way more into you.

Forget about this babe and worry about the puzzy that wants you.

She must come to you but you can't worry about it.

It's so much easier to look at dating to who you are fvcking and who you aren't. Babes who like you make the sex easy and often.

 

[ayydrewski]

When your in this position of not being sure or trying to manage yourself so as to increase her desire the best bet is to pull most if your attention and start spending more time and fvcking a woman who is way more into you.

Forget about this babe and worry about the puzzy that wants you.

She must come to you but you can't worry about it.

It's so much easier to look at dating to who you are fvcking and who you aren't. Babes who like you make the sex easy and often.

So not always necessarily disappearing completely but texting her very minimally could work too? If she has some interest she wouldnt be texting at all, but texting her could that lower their respect for you even more? She just texted me that i dont talk much with her so she suspects something is up

 

[mrgoodstuff]

So not always necessarily disappearing completely but texting her very minimally could work too? If she has some interest she wouldnt be texting at all, but texting her could that lower their respect for you even more? She just texted me that i dont talk much with her so she suspects something is up

Don't text her! Stop talking for two weeks. Tell her you were busy. Start fvcking and talking to that other babe it will correct your view point

 

[ayydrewski]

Don't text her! Stop talking for two weeks. Tell her you were busy. Start fvcking and talking to that other babe it will correct your view point

Sorry for the confusion, theres only one girl im talking about here. I actually dont have a lot of plates im spinning right now. So if I take that route could she lose interest entirely?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Sorry for the confusion, theres only one girl im talking about here. I actually dont have a lot of plates im spinning right now. So if I take that route could she lose interest entirely?

Who cares it's already lost. Try to pull someone up that you know you can fvxk. It'll get your head right. The other girl is in a netflix and chill position. That's her only option. Otherwise she'll keep stringing you along, robbing you for your swag and confidence. All the games they play are for a reason.

 

[ayydrewski]

Who cares it's already lost. Try to pull someone up that you know you can fvxk. It'll get your head right. The other girl is in a netflix and chill position. That's her only option. Otherwise she'll keep stringing you along, robbing you for your swag and confidence. All the games they play are for a reason.

You seem right about that. She was teasing me last week a little about when we were going to watch Netflix and chill, and I asked her what her schedule was like for next week but she said she didn't know. Now she seems to be having only friendly conversations with me and texting me alot about my day. I am currently ignoring her and would like to continue to ignore her for a couple weeks especially until this pandemic clears up. But is it wrong for me to feel bad that I am not answering this woman back?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

You seem right about that. She was teasing me last week a little about when we were going to watch Netflix and chill, and I asked her what her schedule was like for next week but she said she didn't know. Now she seems to be having only friendly conversations with me and texting me alot about my day. I am currently ignoring her and would like to continue to ignore her for a couple weeks especially until this pandemic clears up. But is it wrong for me to feel bad that I am not answering this woman back?

No. If she likes you at all her feelings will escalate over the coming days. Some will be communicated on text. But for u to get into the right place of self value it's imperative that your laying with a different lady who desires you inside her.

 

[ayydrewski]

Thanks @mrgoodstuff, Ive tried to sexualize our conversations through texting around the time of setting up the second date and she didnt seem open to it. At this point you would think it is some kind of test she is giving me or using me for my attention?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Thanks @mrgoodstuff, Ive tried to sexualize our conversations through texting around the time of setting up the second date and she didnt seem open to it. At this point you would think it is some kind of test she is giving me or using me for my attention?

Attention. It don't take much to sexualize when they like u. Take my advice. It's magic.

 

[metalwater]

1. Should I go cold turkey and disappear for a couple of days/weeks.
2. If I continue to talk to her, how do I limit my non-sexual attention and text her without being too boring?
3. With situation like this is a second chance possible?

Women are on a 28 or 30 day cycle. What she wants this week will be different next week, but the same again in a month.

 

[ayydrewski]

Women are on a 28 or 30 day cycle. What she wants this week will be different next week, but the same again in a month.

maybe but they still get reliable D from other guys

 

[ayydrewski]

I'm not one to ask about text game or OLD game. I'm a bit of a caveman.
Back in the day, I would screen my calls, and if it was a girl I hadn't spoken to in a week or so, and it wasn't a weekend, I'd pick up, and talk to her for a little while, and as often as not she'd invite me over within about 30 minutes or less. But, women like the sound of my voice, so "phone game" may not apply equally to everyone. To me though, text is impersonal; you forwarded an amusing meme to her? So what? Her grandmother or brother could have done that. If you ask me, the only valid purpose of text is to concisely transmit information. Aside from that, your texts are unlikely to make her panties wet, unless YOU already make her wet. Too many guys have this a ssbackwards, if you ask me, and are trying to use text as a panty peeler, because they're too scared to talk on the phone. That's just my opinion though. I'm sure you'll find a dozen younger guys to tell you how great their text game is; so, maybe I'm just a dinosaur.

If it were me, though, I wouldn't initiate texts or call to her, but if she texted me, and I ideas really interested in pursuing something with her, the next time she texted me asking how I was, I might text back, "call me and I'll tell you," and and just leave it at that. If she doesn't call, no problem. Always forward. Texting is chicken ****, though, IMHO.

Valid point but im not planning to be on the phone with her all the time. My issue I think with her is we text too often so the conversation is/has gone stale. After trying to set up second date she never gave me definitive answer. She still tries to reach out for conversation but she makes it hard to be intimate. There is a small language barrier, besides that we’ve been talking everyday. There wouldn’t be any reason to text back it’s not like I can raise her interest?

 

[Ohso-Phresh]

She definitely does have other guys around her since she's told me she talks to them. In this case I should just stop talking to her completely? I feel like I'm a puppet to her now and nothing I can do will get things back on track from our initial spark. Also shes in her mid 30s so do they think differently at that age? She said she doesnt want any man in her life hinting for casual relationships

Yes, stop talking, move on.

Yes you are being a puppet on a string, create a more interesting life for yourself.

Yes they do think differently, beta bucks guys are showing up on her radar where before they were not.

Women say all sorts of stuff, it doesn’t matter and it’s a red herring. They want to feel alive with positive emotions. A guy that can give her that and sex her good - she’ll backwards rationalize. Observe her behavior it is more truthful than anything out of her mouth.