BPD ex, had rebound, how to proceed

[Epic Days]

Hoh! no wonder I've never met these BPD women despite fvcking around in so many countries.

So the actual problem is that OP is feminine - both psychologically and emotionally.

The much needed polarity has disappeared.

And since nature made women to subconsciously follow/mirror men's lead, to counter or to balance it, she has to turn herself more masculine, no?

No wonder women are turning into nutjobs...

I’m afraid so. It’s made up for pathetic people. to explain to them that it’s not their fault that they got their ass kicked.

 

[Spaz]

Quit being a troll. Based on what op said, it sounds like she indeed is BPD. Which isn’t a reaction to the relationship but childhood trauma. After he switched frame is when she discarded him. As per natural polarity would dictate.

Would you like it if I just blindly accused "her" or any woman simply because you agree with OP when NEITHER of you are medical doctors?

All I see or hear in this thread is a weak man allowing a woman to bully him.

And the rest of the BPD man squad here doing what they're always been doing.

How is that helping OP?

Has it ever helped any man in any BPD thread?

All this will stop WHEN OP learns to man the fvck up, stand his ground, have clear solid boundaries and fvcking know how to lead.

Regardless if the woman is BPD, NPD or from hell itself.

Regardless if she's a normal woman.

Regardless if she's thinks she's an alien.

Now before you try to educate me on what's a troll, do think why is the focus on the woman for most of the posters here and why is it not the same with me?

Different mindsets will always produce different results in life.

 

[synecdoche]

Would you like it if I just blindly accused "her" or any woman simply because you agree with OP when NEITHER of you are medical doctors?

All I see or hear in this thread is a weak man allowing a woman to bully him.

And the rest of the BPD man squad here doing what they're always been doing.

How is that helping OP?

Has it ever helped any man in any BPD thread?

All this will stop WHEN OP learns to man the fvck up, stand his ground, have clear solid boundaries and fvcking know how to lead.

Regardless if the woman is BPD, NPD or from hell itself.

Regardless if she's a normal woman.

Regardless if she's thinks she's an alien.

Now before you try to educate me on what's a troll, do think why is the focus on the woman for most of the posters here and why is it not the same with me?

Different mindsets will always produce different results in life.

Spaz, how do you keep your boundaries? You make them clear from the beginning and once they cross one you next them?

I suppose the mindset you are talking about is one of abundance and having a strong purpose? Women are just plus to your life?

And could you give an example on how you are constantly leading the women. Leading the conversations? Setting up the dates?

 

[Spaz]

Spaz, how do you keep your boundaries? You make them clear from the beginning and once they cross one you next them?

My boundaries flows from my frame and that's how I can keep to it.

Frame is not a single thing but a mixture of many things that makes up the "whole" of you.

Frame = your inherent personality (passive/dominant) and ur childhood upbringing + how you think (knowledge/experiences) + how you do things (how you act in real life).

The good thing is frame can be built on through gaining more knowledge and acting upon it, the stronger it is, the more you project it subconsciously and people/women will automatically pick on it.

I suppose the mindset you are talking about is one of abundance and having a strong purpose? Women are just plus to your life?

When it comes to women then the answer is a resounding yes.

And could you give an example on how you are constantly leading the women. Leading the conversations? Setting up the dates?

For me, that too flows from my frame.

In each given situation I'm flexible to that situation.

For example, if I'm in a mixed crowd, I have the tendency to engage others in conversations whilst if I'm in a company of mostly women then I prefer to listen to them more and ask them leading on questions to get them to talk more, because I find it highly amusing.

As for dates, I don't think I did ask for any last year because I've got plenty of invites from young women through social networking.

 

[MountainSlide]

My boundaries flows from my frame and that's how I can keep to it.

Frame is not a single thing but a mixture of many things that makes up the "whole" of you.

Frame = your inherent personality (passive/dominant) and ur childhood upbringing + how you think (knowledge/experiences) + how you do things (how you act in real life).

The good thing is frame can be built on through gaining more knowledge and acting upon it, the stronger it is, the more you project it subconsciously and people/women will automatically pick on it.



When it comes to women then the answer is a resounding yes.



For me, that too flows from my frame.

In each given situation I'm flexible to that situation.

For example, if I'm in a mixed crowd, I have the tendency to engage others in conversations whilst if I'm in a company of mostly women then I prefer to listen to them more and ask them leading on questions to get them to talk more, because I find it highly amusing.

As for dates, I don't think I did ask for any last year because I've got plenty of invites from young women through social networking.

Even though we may not agree on everything in this thread. I think it’s safe to say that we agree being sucked in by a bpd chick, or if you get to the point where you think you have, is a result of having a weak frame and not upholding boundaries. If you have good frame you’ll dump a girl that shows signs of being a potential bpd candidate.

That being said. Once a guy has lost his frame and has been dragged through the thistles, saying “suck it up pu$$y” doesn’t help either. He needs to go permanent no contact with the girl. The relationship can not be fixed. He needs to go to the gym, engage in other hobbies, meet other women, and get her off his mind so that he can restore his frame and not make the same mistake again.

 

[Epic Days]

Even though we may not agree on everything in this thread. I think it’s safe to say that we agree being sucked in by a bpd chick, or if you get to the point where you think you have, is a result of having a weak frame and not upholding boundaries as a result. If you have good frame you’ll dump a girl that shows signs of being a potential bpd candidate.

That being said. Once a guy has lost his frame and has been dragged through the thistles, saying “suck it up pu$$y” doesn’t help either. He needs to go permanent no contact with the girl. The relationship can not be fixed. He needs to go to the gym, engage in other hobbies, meet other women, and get her off his mind so that he can restore his frame and not make the same mistake again.

I do not separate the supposed BPD women from the other women. If she’s heated up and hot to trot, she going to want sex from me. And that’s her purpose.

Over the years I have observed that in relationships and marriages, the men all get the same treatment. Regardless of of supposed upbringings.

The exceptions that I have noticed that could be the exception, possibly, are women who have snagged men well above her sexual value and looks. Not just a little bit but a lot and she has to work hard to keep him.

In all the rest of the cases, the tactics and manipulations are identical. A man who sees “BPD’s” gets them. In fact he sets it up. In fact he actually creates the very thing he fears in her. I can prove it. I look at the man.

What exactly does the man attract? The woman who feels that she can get away with manipulating to ALL her advantage. The ones she knows she can’t will get all that best that she can give.

The one who fears the “BPD” will get it. It’s not real. It doesn’t exist. It’s called her resentment and disgust for the man. Her dog to kick. Her mule to lead around like a carrot. Men who are looking for a girlfriend are susceptible.

 

[MountainSlide]

I do not separate the supposed BPD women from the other women. If she’s heated up and hot to trot, she going to want sex from me. And that’s her purpose.

Over the years I have observed that in relationships and marriages, the men all get the same treatment. Regardless of of supposed upbringings.

The exceptions that I have noticed that could be the exception, possibly, are women who have snagged men well above her sexual value and looks. Not just a little bit but a lot and she has to work hard to keep him.

In all the rest of the cases, the tactics and manipulations are identical. A man who sees “BPD’s” gets them. In fact he sets it up. In fact he actually creates the very thing he fears in her. I can prove it. I look at the man.

What exactly does the man attract? The woman who feels that she can get away with manipulating to ALL her advantage. The ones she knows she can’t will get all that best that she can give.

The one who fears the “BPD” will get it. It’s not real. It doesn’t exist. It’s called her resentment and disgust for the man. Her dog to kick. Her mule to lead around like a carrot. Men who are looking for a girlfriend are susceptible.

You’re disagreeing with me for no reason. Women that have BPD do exist. It’s just a categorization by the medical community of a number of traits. That being said, research shows that their brains are actually different than a normal persons. BPD men exist too. It’s in the same class of people that suffer from narcissistic personality disorder and anti social personality disorder (sociopaths). I’m going to drop out of this conversation now because you guys don’t know what you’re talking about and it’s a waste of my time.

 

[Epic Days]

You’re disagreeing with me for no reason. Women that have BPD do exist.

There is no actual evidence whatsoever for any and all chemical imbalances of the brain. There is zero proof. Their brains are not different.

Funny how the psychiatrists claim this stuff but there is absolutely no cure or understanding. If they actually knew what was going on they could cure it.
Therefore it is fake. If all they can do is prescribe a psychotropic drug, then they know virtually nothing. When the cause of something is found, a handling is always available. Therefore, they are barking up the wrong tree.

So yes I’m opposed to your assertions. There is no argument. But who am I to tell YOU what to think? Carry on. Go forth to your Much needed learning. There’s a lot of things about women you don’t get. Maybe that perfect woman will jump in your lap. Lol

You may think there are no unicorns consciously but your subconscious still does. Now there’s real science to prove that and it’s curable.

 

[MountainSlide]

Funny how the psychiatrists claim this stuff but there is absolutely no cure or understanding. If they actually knew what was going on they could cure it.
Therefore it is fake

I guess cancer must be fake as well then?

 

[Epic Days]

I guess cancer must be fake as well then?

Not at all. There’s real science for it. It is an immune system issue. It has been cured through diet in thousands of cases but way more importantly, it is preventable.

There are some very good science articles that prove that smoking alone does not cause cancer. It is a combination of poor life habits, poor diet via high insulin levels, inactivity and then throw smoking on top of it. My sister is an an oncologist. A couch potato who smokes? Good luck with that. There are long distance athletes right now that can attest to it opening (dialating) their airways.

Everyone has free radicals and actual cancer cells in their body. Your immune system needs to be suppressed for them to grow. Smoking is not and immune system depressant. It doesn’t mean I advocate it. Tobacco was used for a very log time in various ways as a medicine for upper respiratory infections and ailments. Quite successfully.

 

[Prettyboy Dee]

Bpd is a cop out for guys who are having trouble with women, they have something to blame it on, also, bpd is not that damn common where every girl who doesnt fall into ya frame has it lol, sucks for the people who actually struggle with it.

As far as the OP goes, move on

 

[MountainSlide]

There are some very good science articles that prove that smoking alone does not cause cancer. It is a combination of poor life habits, poor diet via high insulin levels, inactivity and then throw smoking on top of it. My sister is an an oncologist. A couch potato who smokes? Good luck with that. There are long distance athletes right now that can attest to it opening (dialating) their airways.

Smoking doesn’t cause cancer but there’s a strong statistical correlation that links smoking to increased likelihood of developing cancer. I used to smoke frequently and feel much better having dropped it.

When it comes to people who have BPD. It’s a developmental disorder, the brain is affected by trauma while it’s still being developed. Studies suggest that there are differences in the functioning in a person’s brain who has it vs someone who doesn’t. And I think that it’s interesting that people who have been diagnosed have a tendency to all act out in very similar ways as well as express patterns of behaviour that are pretty much predictive between one person to the next. At the end of the day, it’s merely a set of criteria that’s used to categorize a person who follows a certain set of criteria in their behaviours. So it’s a real thing. And any dude that has his shyt together won’t put up with it.

 

[Epic Days]

Smoking doesn’t cause cancer but there’s a strong statistical correlation that links smoking to increased likelihood of developing cancer. I used to smoke frequently and feel much better having dropped it.

When it comes to people who have BPD. It’s a developmental disorder, the brain is affected by trauma while it’s still being developed. Studies suggest that there are differences in the functioning in a person’s brain who has it vs someone who doesn’t. And I think that it’s interesting that people who have been diagnosed have a tendency to all act out in very similar ways as well as express patterns of behaviour that are pretty much predictive been one person to the next. At the end of the day, it’s merely a set of criteria that’s used to categorize a person who follows a certain set of criteria in their behaviours. So it’s a real thing. And any dude that has his shyt together won’t put up with it.

It’s called a survival strategy and plenty of women become better women with the right man. Ask them.
As for an increasing amount of effeminate men? Born into a feminine environment?
Women find the whole thing disgusting. Not because then men grew up in that environment, but because they fall for the simplest and easiest manipulations. Then they act like they are gut shot and fall apart.

 

[MountainSlide]

It’s called a survival strategy and plenty of women become better women with the right man. Ask them.
As for an increasing amount of effeminate men? Born into a feminine environment?
Women find the whole thing disgusting. Not because then men grew up in that environment, but because they fall for the simplest and easiest manipulations. Then they act like they are gut shot and fall apart.

yes, survival strategy definitely plays a role.

it seems that there is a strong movement whose sole purpose is destroy masculinity. All these dudes are buying into it and becoming feminine. seems as though society is trying to turn men into a bunch of beta supplicants.

 

[Epic Days]

yes, survival strategy definitely plays a role.

it seems that there is a strong movement whose sole purpose is destroy masculinity. All these dudes are buying into it and becoming feminine. seems as though society is trying to turn men into a bunch of beta supplicants.

Agreed. That is the feminine imperative. It has always been there and will always be there.

The cure isn’t fixing a made up malady. It’s fixing men.
A woman would be powerless to exert these so called BPD traits. And if she did act up in a way to manipulate a man’s emotion he would most likely laugh at her or wave her off with a hand.

People, no matter who they are will correct their conduct under the correct pro-survival duress. Suddenly their BPD goes away when their survival is at risk. As long as it works on stupid men, it will only get worse.

Victim men running around talking about how dangerous BPD is, are actually creating bad conduct in women and also promoting it. Women are not single points of light. They are molding to their environment. That is biology.

 

[MountainSlide]

Agreed. That is the feminine imperative. It has always been there and will always be there.

The cure isn’t fixing a made up malady. It’s fixing men.
A woman would be powerless to exert these so called BPD traits. And if she did act up in a way to manipulate a man’s emotion he would most likely laugh at her or wave her off with a hand.

People, no matter who they are will correct their conduct under the correct pro-survival duress. Suddenly their BPD goes away when their survival is at risk. As long as it works on stupid men, it will only get worse.

Victim men running around talking about how dangerous BPD is, are actually creating bad conduct in women and also promoting it. Women are not single points of light. They are molding to their environment. That is biology.

Sure. My philosophy on this topic is simple though. Be selective in who you date and who you spend time with. Dump girls that don’t respect boundaries. And never change your beliefs/values for someone else’s. When a guy expects a girl to complete him, he’s setting himself up for a big fall. If you ignore red flags because you want the girl to be who she’s pretending to be, you’re setting yourself up for a fall.

 

[Vantagepoint34]

I do not separate the supposed BPD women from the other women. If she’s heated up and hot to trot, she going to want sex from me. And that’s her purpose.

Over the years I have observed that in relationships and marriages, the men all get the same treatment. Regardless of of supposed upbringings.

The exceptions that I have noticed that could be the exception, possibly, are women who have snagged men well above her sexual value and looks. Not just a little bit but a lot and she has to work hard to keep him.

In all the rest of the cases, the tactics and manipulations are identical. A man who sees “BPD’s” gets them. In fact he sets it up. In fact he actually creates the very thing he fears in her. I can prove it. I look at the man.

What exactly does the man attract? The woman who feels that she can get away with manipulating to ALL her advantage. The ones she knows she can’t will get all that best that she can give.

The one who fears the “BPD” will get it. It’s not real. It doesn’t exist. It’s called her resentment and disgust for the man. Her dog to kick. Her mule to lead around like a carrot. Men who are looking for a girlfriend are susceptible.

Hmmm Bpd is thrown around on ss too much. Like we're always sure this is a bpd. Always too vague of a description of the girl...Op always is going to do what he wants and his security is something like being "sure" this case is a "Bpd". Answer is more simple like He didn't go to school with this girl at any point. Being blocked on social media is something that's not been around that long. Once again we can't jump to conclusions. More like this girl is just crazy lol but more details could be useful. Example like if the girl had a brother we could more easliy tell if she has baggage or you could distinguish the red flags. To get somewhere and be a successful womanizer etc.

 

[Prettyboy Dee]

Girl blocks you on social media? Oh shes a bpd, girl doesnt return phone call? Shes bpd, girl goes from hot to cold? Oh she has to be bpd lol

 

[Vantagepoint34]

Girl blocks you on social media? Oh shes a bpd, girl doesnt return phone call? Shes bpd, girl goes from hot to cold? Oh she has to be bpd lol

Is a stripper a BPD?

 

[Epic Days]

I’ve read about all those BPD “traits”. Every women I have ever met can, will and does express them. It’s all in the context of the type of man they are around.

Steady monogamous girlfriend? A man needs to observe women more. Those thoughts shouldn’t even be in your heads.