Tricky lil situation huh..
I think the manosphere and its concepts are good for explaining things. And for making you more situationally aware. For example, you went on a date and it didn't result in a second date. You read some stuff on the internet so you know it's likely you didn't do something or you did something she subconsciously/consciously didn't like. So you can experiment and try not to do that thing again instead of thinking you need to buy the next girl roses and win her heart by being full blown nice guy.
But you shouldn't lose yourself in applying these things. I think that's one of the things that makes it come off as creepy when you approach a girl. If you're just rolling off some routine without any authenticity, it's creepy. If it's forced, it comes off as creepy. But if you just relax and talk to her like she's a human being, I'm sure everything will work out fine. I practiced it today. Here's what it looked like:
I met a girl in the gym the other day, and she was thicc boiii. So I just went over and asked what she was training for, because she was going hard af and looked like she knew what she was doing (being myself, I had a normal question that crossed my mind and I was curious so I asked it). She said she was training for 'me' and the convo carried on from there. Details unimportant, but we were just talking about working out and I learned some stuff about her. I got her number after saying maybe she could put me through a workout sometime (maybe I should've framed it differently, but who cares... can't be overthinking all the time. I just gave her me in that moment). So I see her in the gym the next day, I just say what's up and do my workout. I've learned from SS to not be all up in her grill and give her too much attention. I had a workout to do, a long one, so I waved and kept it moving. So now we've arrived at today. She's working out, some mf stole my squat rack and there happened to be one next to her. I head over. Obviously I wanted to talk to her when I got the chance but I wasn't forcing it. I just waited until we were both between sets and made eye contact. Let it happen, natural ting. We talked a couple times, each time I didn't really have a goal but to chat and maybe get to know her. I wasn't pressed to impress her, or ask her on a date, or touch her arm. I just talked. We found more commonalities. If something came to mind... I said it. I gave her me, in that moment (be yourself). For example, she was playing Cardi B. I hate Cardi B. So I joked on her about it. And she was like "I gotta hear some trap while I work out" so I responded "You mean some
crap." I wasn't concerned with how she'd perceive it, I said what I wanted. (She was playfully offended and it worked out well. But the point is that I said what I wanted and what I felt and I was indifferent, another SS lesson). She proceeded with "I'm upset..." and I: "
....50 thousand on my head that's disrespect " We were just vibin' man. And it was a cool interaction because I was myself. We ended up talking about doing something next weekend. I was not overthinking things in that interaction, and I think it paid off. I implemented some basic things I learned from SS but it wasn't like I was running some formula on her calculating her every move. It doesn't need to be like that.
Just read to become aware and then go live your life. You'll be more prepared after you read. You may not get it the first time, but the idea is to internalize it over time. Progress not perfection. Part of being a DJ
is being yourself and being unapologetic about it. If people don't like you for you, then fvck 'em. You can want to improve and to be a better
version but don't lose yourself.
I am confident that I'm a cool person. People will enjoy being around me if they give it a chance - if they don't want to... oh well, everything wasn't meant to be. I'm not saying that in a c0cky way, I'm just saying I know I'm not an @sshole or weird and I think I say some funny stuff/bring up interesting ideas. So generally why wouldn't the typical individual want to hang out with me? That's the kind of person I would want to hang out with. But when I start over-analyzing and reading my manosphere playbook play-by-play in real time, then things don't go well. I get stiff, weird, and do things I wouldn't normally do. Peep this whenever you have time. It put things into perspective for me in this regard:
