DJ Bootcamp 2019

[GrowingPains]

Week 4:

Mission: 10 rejections.

Was debating whether to do this week or not, mainly because I was feeling like rejection is so rare. Girls hand out their number just to get you out of their face. But then I remembered this incident.

Anywho, chick had a bf apparently. I didn't press and ask her questions about him to see if he was real. The way she was acting while we talked was enough proof.

And this one.

She: yeah I know but I have a gf
I: that's fine, I'm not the jealous type
She rolled her eyes and I bounced.

So, let's get these rejections, boyz. I have spoken to some girls already this week, but I'm gonna ignore those. I'm curious on what the stats will be of this week. After 10 rejections, how many numbers do I have? How many of those numbers turn into dates?

I'm expecting most rejections to be in the form of "I have a boyfriend" so I'm looking forward to responding to those. Let's see how I do.

Stay tuned.

 

[shouldbefun]

Got complacent and for a week didn’t approach because I approached a hottie, exchanged numbers but I pressed hard with her and shes ignoring me now. Anyways, back in the game; feeling rusty.

Lesson: never settle.

 

[GrowingPains]

Got complacent and for a week didn’t approach because I approached a hottie, exchanged numbers but I pressed hard with her and shes ignoring me now. Anyways, back in the game; feeling rusty.

Lesson: never settle.

"Proud but never satisfied."

I'm going to put this on hold for a little while. At most for the next 5 weeks until finals are over. If I can get it together before then, great. But priorities.

I am getting d!cked down by school right now. And that's unacceptable.

I expect much more from myself. And it's time to put the work in to meet those expectations.

No more excuses, no more 'it's okay, you're still adjusting', no more being soft.

"How you like me now, I'm gettin' busier." - Jack the Ripper x LL Cool J

 

[shouldbefun]

"Proud but never satisfied."

I'm going to put this on hold for a little while. At most for the next 5 weeks until finals are over. If I can get it together before then, great. But priorities.

I am getting d!cked down by school right now. And that's unacceptable.

I expect much more from myself. And it's time to put the work in to meet those expectations.

No more excuses, no more 'it's okay, you're still adjusting', no more being soft.

"How you like me now, I'm gettin' busier." - Jack the Ripper x LL Cool J

Don’t. You’ll lose the skills, you’ll grow in those 5 weeks. Just decrease the volume.
Approach in between study breaks haha.

 

[GrowingPains]

Don’t. You’ll lose the skills, you’ll grow in those 5 weeks. Just decrease the volume.
Approach in between study breaks haha.

We'll see.

Stay tuned.

 

[shouldbefun]

Ok after two weeks of somehow messing up with no gaming, didn't approach anyone in those two weeks, somehow I don't know how I missed that.

I tried reading and I read, and read, but somehow I wasn't feeling it.

Its really hard to explain, and i can't find the words, but I kept saying I'll approach and somehow I didn't. I would say "lets approach" and my legs would turn into jelly. Heart went up.

Then somehow I said to myself, and I don't even remember what had an effect on me.

Then I saw her, and somehow just went for it. How I found that energy to approach, I'll never know because before I was literally anxious as heck. Then I saw this girl I liked, blonde, short hair. She was on her phone, kinda sleepy and I just walked up to her. She got frightened when I said hey. First time I ever frightened a girl. Maybe my vibes were off because of no practice ? Said a direct line, went choppy a few times. She smiled before I got a rejection. Didn't even introduce myself. stupid me. But somehow I didn't feel fear of approaching/talking/closing and my legs were not jelly. Didn't feel bad typing that I lost that one.

Whats happening ?

Next time I see a girl walking away that I like, Im chasing her. No more of don't cares.

I know theres no "get results fast" with women but man, Im just frustrated that Im not there enjoying it, if you know what I mean. Alas, the guys with GF's have been practicing this since prepubescent years talking to chicks and experimenting.

 

[shouldbefun]

Another approach. Jeez what is wrong with me? Brunette. Literally smiling as hard as possible when she saw me and Im like shes alright, she looked nice but my mind was downgrading her. Opened her with the lamest ****, she kept smiling, felt attracted but my mind downplayed it that shes a 4 and Im lying to myself about her attraction, solid 5-6. What the heck? Its like if a girl isnt super hot, I don’t feel like i need to get her. Like she wasnt ug but wasn’t super hot, so I was like nah I’ll take a pass. Doesnt pass the boner test but I guess that was my mind trying to fear from opening a girl up. Next time I open, Im going all the way. No wishy washy. That was like free practice, next time I need to approach with the mindset that I want to **** her. Binary. Yes or no. Maybe its fear. Fear of opening up. Idk.

 

[GrowingPains]

Whats happening ?

I'm not 100% sure, but all of this just sounds like approach anxiety. You took a break for 2 weeks. So you lost the little bit of momentum you had. Now it doesn't feel natural to approach anymore. And maybe since you've done some approaches, your mind is like "Oh I can handle this no problem/that girl's not worth me approaching/whatever else it wants to make up" that keep you from doing the approach - masked approach anxiety. I could be wrong. But that's what I notice when I feel how you do.

Here's 2 rejections:

One of the girls that works in the dining hall had a nice rack so I decided to pull up to her. I was asking her small talk questions but I was literally just rattling them off and she seemed kind of nervous about why I was talking to her. Like I was interrogating her ('as if I were the IRS' is how I described it in another thread). But once we started talking about music I kinda cooled it with the questions and the convo became more calm. But the whole time she was 'working' and moving around. And by working I mean wiping the counters so she could've stopped for a sec. But she wasn't return volleying my questions and she started to walk away in the middle of one, and I'm no lost puppy so I said 'nice to meet you' and dipped. I'll count that as a rejection.

I was at a sporting goods store, just chatting with the cashier. She was okay. I was standing in line waiting and I saw her walk by and at that moment I decided I wasn't going to try anything because she wasn't attractive. Then I got called to her register and we just started vibing so I said shiiiii why not. She asked if I wanted my receipts and I said 'Nah, but you know what you could do with them..." "What's that?" "Write your phone number down". She declined because she 'wasn't allowed'. That could be true. It could be false. Either way, I persisted and just said "Well you can just tell it to me" but got the same response. She sounded like she wanted to give it to me but oh well, end result is the same: no number. But its still a win because that's rejection #2! Lesgettit.

 

[shouldbefun]

I'm not 100% sure, but all of this just sounds like approach anxiety. You took a break for 2 weeks. So you lost the little bit of momentum you had. Now it doesn't feel natural to approach anymore. And maybe since you've done some approaches, your mind is like "Oh I can handle this no problem/that girl's not worth me approaching/whatever else it wants to make up" that keep you from doing the approach - masked approach anxiety. I could be wrong. But that's what I notice when I feel how you do.

Here's 2 rejections:

One of the girls that works in the dining hall had a nice rack so I decided to pull up to her. I was asking her small talk questions but I was literally just rattling them off and she seemed kind of nervous about why I was talking to her. Like I was interrogating her ('as if I were the IRS' is how I described it in another thread). But once we started talking about music I kinda cooled it with the questions and the convo became more calm. But the whole time she was 'working' and moving around. And by working I mean wiping the counters so she could've stopped for a sec. But she wasn't return volleying my questions and she started to walk away in the middle of one, and I'm no lost puppy so I said 'nice to meet you' and dipped. I'll count that as a rejection.

I was at a sporting goods store, just chatting with the cashier. She was okay. I was standing in line waiting and I saw her walk by and at that moment I decided I wasn't going to try anything because she wasn't attractive. Then I got called to her register and we just started vibing so I said shiiiii why not. She asked if I wanted my receipts and I said 'Nah, but you know what you could do with them..." "What's that?" "Write your phone number down". She declined because she 'wasn't allowed'. That could be true. It could be false. Either way, I persisted and just said "Well you can just tell it to me" but got the same response. She sounded like she wanted to give it to me but oh well, end result is the same: no number. But its still a win because that's rejection #2! Lesgettit.

I wanted to think about what was there before responding, and I have to say maybe it was anxiety or some ****. I got a oneitis and I think its gone now, a good 3 ole weeks, still recovering lmao. Legit 1 week of no hot chicks on campus. Feels hard man. Now they start coming back... I'm pretty bummed out that its soon summer though. What am I gonna do ? I need to find work if I want to game but I need to hang out with my family, and if I hang out with the fam then forget about women because I like being single/no disturbances when I game. Hanging with family is being an official incel because my family try to be pretty tight.

I wanted to approach two chicks today but the fear of being recognized as "that guy who talks to girls and then leaves" bothered me. It felt so demoralizing.

Approached one on the weekends, but it was a friendly chat. She kinda was a 6 but it was dark and I was tired as **** so I just didn't press the matter.

I still feel messed up with one event, I mean I should let it go but somehow its still eating me up, the what if... She gave me approach me signal but I didn't do anything because I wasn't in the zone and I was thinking about another girl and hence I wasted a really good opportunity. She gave me the signals but I was like no way that girl of that caliber is into me, a solid 8.5. Something like candice swanepoel. Fml. I later realized and did the math, but Idk still hurts. I wish I could reply time back, I would approach her.

So all in all, I think I also lost my bravado and discipline to approach, and I feel rock zero all again. I wish my course was some social sciences, **** STEM man. **** it. I want ***** and not those numbers and formulas, and proofs.

I want to be back at it and be a ***** slayer, and be the confident dude who has the frame and **** but it feels like my journey is the same as sisyphus. Just as I get above ground, I fall and I climb again. It takes patience not to surrender to this madness.

Anyways, I think I'll start with week 0 all again ?

 

[GrowingPains]

I wanted to think about what was there before responding, and I have to say maybe it was anxiety or some ****. I got a oneitis and I think its gone now, a good 3 ole weeks, still recovering lmao. Legit 1 week of no hot chicks on campus. Feels hard man. Now they start coming back... I'm pretty bummed out that its soon summer though. What am I gonna do ? I need to find work if I want to game but I need to hang out with my family, and if I hang out with the fam then forget about women because I like being single/no disturbances when I game. Hanging with family is being an official incel because my family try to be pretty tight.

I wanted to approach two chicks today but the fear of being recognized as "that guy who talks to girls and then leaves" bothered me. It felt so demoralizing.

Approached one on the weekends, but it was a friendly chat. She kinda was a 6 but it was dark and I was tired as **** so I just didn't press the matter.

I still feel messed up with one event, I mean I should let it go but somehow its still eating me up, the what if... She gave me approach me signal but I didn't do anything because I wasn't in the zone and I was thinking about another girl and hence I wasted a really good opportunity. She gave me the signals but I was like no way that girl of that caliber is into me, a solid 8.5. Something like candice swanepoel. Fml. I later realized and did the math, but Idk still hurts. I wish I could reply time back, I would approach her.

So all in all, I think I also lost my bravado and discipline to approach, and I feel rock zero all again. I wish my course was some social sciences, **** STEM man. **** it. I want ***** and not those numbers and formulas, and proofs.

I want to be back at it and be a ***** slayer, and be the confident dude who has the frame and **** but it feels like my journey is the same as sisyphus. Just as I get above ground, I fall and I climb again. It takes patience not to surrender to this madness.

Anyways, I think I'll start with week 0 all again ?

Fear nothing. What's a girl going to do to you? Say no? Whenever you feel uncomfortable about something, ask yourself: am I gonna die? What's the worst that could happen? Can I handle that consequence? Fvck yeah I can.

"Rejection is better than regret" came to mind reading your post. If you want something, the only thing standing in your way is you. Get the fvck out of your way. Simple.

See my signature. Cut the 'am I worthy of the 8.5' mindset. You need to start thinking 'is she worthy of me?'

If not wanting to be a STEM major is so unimportant to you that you're willing to be a social science major because of some *****... I suggest you get a grip. Women are not the focus of life. Right now I've had to put approaching on pause because I need to focus on my work. I'm a STEM grad student too, sh!ts hard. But are you living life for pvssy or to be great and contribute something? Get on your fvcking purpose. Changing your major isn't going to make more girls appear. The same girls will exist regardless of what your major is. So stop whining and find a way to bring them into your life.

You need to grab your balls and go approach more girls. Do it on the weekend or something.

 

[shouldbefun]

Fear nothing. What's a girl going to do to you? Say no? Whenever you feel uncomfortable about something, ask yourself: am I gonna die? What's the worst that could happen? Can I handle that consequence? Fvck yeah I can.

"Rejection is better than regret" came to mind reading your post. If you want something, the only thing standing in your way is you. Get the fvck out of your way. Simple.

See my signature. Cut the 'am I worthy of the 8.5' mindset. You need to start thinking 'is she worthy of me?'

If not wanting to be a STEM major is so unimportant to you that you're willing to be a social science major because of some *****... I suggest you get a grip. Women are not the focus of life. Right now I've had to put approaching on pause because I need to focus on my work. I'm a STEM grad student too, sh!ts hard. But are you living life for pvssy or to be great and contribute something? Get on your fvcking purpose. Changing your major isn't going to make more girls appear. The same girls will exist regardless of what your major is. So stop whining and find a way to bring them into your life.

You need to grab your balls and go approach more girls. Do it on the weekend or something.

Yeah I need to dust off and recalibrate. Find ways to approach and have a never quit attitude.

Treat all women I approach unless I had sex with them twice only as options. I'll never feel like I am ready to approach but sometimes I feel more relaxed than the other times which make it easier to approach.

STEM sucks because the jobs are going to suck. No point in learning so much math if you're stuck in a cubicle or on a computer. STEM makes you feel like a cvck like literally are you going to design a microprocessor? A website ? Build an engine ? All of these **** are already built, you're just maintaining them. You won't be the new Elon Musk. Now liberal arts suck balls too, I mean I wouldn't want to study gender studies or some bull****. But something that has access to a good network, money, puss, events and more hands on work than sitting in a cubicle. Imagine working for GQ as a writer/photographer !

Website design is a serious place to be, and lots of places are going to need computer scientists/engineers but I mean you are literally staring at a computer designing stuff. As a journalist/photographer, you get to be outside and then do the editing, with the website stuff, you're in the cubicle. You don't tend to play with the cool toys so to speak.

Always wanted to do some cool ****, always wanted to just be creative. Even if its selling coconuts in Hawaii . ... Maybe a Tandem Instructor later in life ?

I might be so fcking wrong though, so can't say for certain.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Y’all are doing great in here

 

[GrowingPains]

Always wanted to do some cool ****

How can you be a fan of Cal Newport and think this way?

"Rule #2: Be So Good They Can’t Ignore You. Here I detail the philosophy that works better than following your passion. This philosophy, which I call career capital theory, says that you first build up rare and valuable skills and then use these skills as leverage to shape you career into something you love.

Rule #4: Think Small, Act Big. In this final rule, I explore how people end up with career-defining missions — often a source of great passion. I argue that you need rare and valuable skills before you can identify a powerful mission."

You say you can't be the next Elon Musk. I love Elon's work. But what's different between you and him? He doesn't have a graduate degree. He has a creative mind which he acquired by being intensely curious and being deeply involved in the industries he was interested in. He had some opportunities that you might not encounter (monetary). But you can do the exact things he did, sure it doesn't mean youll achieve what he did. If you're studying for a graduate degree and you're asking yourself why even be xyz. In my opinion... Stop wasting your money and go explore the world.

My answer to why get a STEM degree, PhD specifically, is that I'll gain insight and ability to make decisions that drive my industry forward. Keep in mind that Elon hires PhD's. Many of them. And without them, there would be no Tesla today. Or SpaceX. Or Neuralink. C'mon man I know you know these things. Elon can't do it on his own. He's a smart guy, technically and business wise, but he isn't the one putting in the work to make these products happen.

You should be asking yourself why you want to have a graduate degree... If pvssy is enough to derail you... You don't care about it enough.

To me, writing for GQ sounds hollow. What good am I doing the world by writing about fashion. Sure I get to have fun and travel and interact with people. But what am I really contributing to the future. Of course, I'm biased as I don't think fashion necessarily furthers the human condition. It's entertainment not necessity. Imo. I still dress fly af tho don't get it twisted.

 

[GrowingPains]

Haven't approached in a while. But I saw a girl on my way to a review session. I had like only 30 seconds. Before I got to where I was going.

Told her I liked her belt. Asked a question about it. Didn't really hear what she said because we got split by other people that were walking between us. She wasn't that cute so I just said "alright, cool" and left lol. My turn to my building was right there anyways.

@shouldbefun I wanna note that I wasn't trynna tell you what to do/how to think. I got super passionate while I was typing and it came out how it did haha.

 

[GrowingPains]

She wasn't that cute

I find that my standards have raised as I've been more focused on my school work. Maybe because if I only have time to speak to a few girls, I want them the be high quality? Idk, I just don't have time to be trynna game and give attention to a girl that I think is okay. I need a girl I can turn into a plate and be excited about banging after a long day of work yahmean. Haha idk, just an observation.

 

[shouldbefun]

Thanks for the good words brother. Made some reflections.

-**** tests, we need to work on that from now on. Be bolder from now on.

Approached today. I saw her from campus before but never made the move, saw her about 6 times but was always unsure. Today I saw her, pondered for 5 minutes and went to her. Went direct. She looked at me and listened. Then certain words have a trigger. She smiled. She's happy to hear those words. Then she regretfully says she has a boyfriend. Oh well, onto the next one. Another rejection, another girl who I liked but got rejected. C'est la vie as they say in life. Should I keep a tally from now on ?

I might want to learn text game.

 

[GrowingPains]

Should I keep a tally from now on ?

Depends on what week you're on.

So ya boi hit the gym today. Plenty of beautiful girls around. Some buuuusty hb7 in the stretching area. Fit hb7 doing some trx fvckme's right next to me. But neither of them had really acknowledged me so I wasn't going to approach until we at least made eye contact. But there was an hb5(.5?) Who I'd been crossing paths with and making eye contact with the whole time I was there. I admit, my eye contact wasn't as strong as I'd like. I shouldve smiled a little more but whatever.

So she was nearby too and was walking toward me. I opened by asking about her shirt. We had a good little chat. She was asking me stuff. Stuff that I hadnt asked her. So I scooped the number. I'll hit her up later but I just wanted to pop in here to say ya boi still got it. Convo was smooth for the most post. I did brain fart for a sec but it's whatever ykno, we out here.

Still hunting these rejections whenever I have time.

 

[shouldbefun]

Depends on what week you're on.

So ya boi hit the gym today. Plenty of beautiful girls around. Some buuuusty hb7 in the stretching area. Fit hb7 doing some trx fvckme's right next to me. But neither of them had really acknowledged me so I wasn't going to approach until we at least made eye contact. But there was an hb5(.5?) Who I'd been crossing paths with and making eye contact with the whole time I was there. I admit, my eye contact wasn't as strong as I'd like. I shouldve smiled a little more but whatever.

So she was nearby too and was walking toward me. I opened by asking about her shirt. We had a good little chat. She was asking me stuff. Stuff that I hadnt asked her. So I scooped the number. I'll hit her up later but I just wanted to pop in here to say ya boi still got it. Convo was smooth for the most post. I did brain fart for a sec but it's whatever ykno, we out here.

Still hunting these rejections whenever I have time.

Finally, some good news haha. Set a date with this 5 if you want ofcourse. I have been out this week instead of studying so I was just absorbing new things and experiences. Tried to have an open mind and not be judgemental of people. I need to internalise this. Life is so good that way.

Have to say, I think its going to be a long journey of self discovery and of reading to reach a level I’ll be unconsciously driven to be social as opposed it feeling forced.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Alright mates, my first week of my 'new life' is coming to an end. It's just me out here; I'm on the other side of the country in a new state, new university, new everything.

Let's jump right in. Class is in session.

I'll post in this thread the results/thoughts of each week by Sunday night each week including this one. I've been working on holding eye contact and saying 'hi' to strangers which are the focuses of this week's exercises before today but I'll exclude those.

Advice, banter, and 'classmates' welcome.

Goals:


Week 1:


Quotes from the text I like:

"You say you want to meet girls. OK. But how hard do you try? I mean really try? I believe some of you approach maybe one to two girls a month, get blown off, get discouraged, go home and pout about it, then beat your meat. Do you honestly expect any success for being so lazy?"

"No, gentlemen, the disgrace of men is in not embracing your true nature: following your passion and, thus, loving life. Women are to enhance your life, not to be your life."

"Nice Guys think, "Does she like me? How do I get her to like me?" Good guys think, "Should I like her? Should I go for her?""
- I found this particularly interesting and it goes along with Pook's "Kill that desperation" article. I notice that in conversations or even observing women, I tend to think about whether she'll like me. I am changing the way I think to be whether she's worth my time and whether I like her enough to ask for her number rather than if she likes me enough to give it to me. My mindset needs work. I know I'm a catch, but most of the time I don't act like it. For example; asking for her phone number instead of telling her I want it.

Exercises:

1) Hold eye contact for 1 second longer than the other person with 50 strangers, 2) say hi to 50 strangers - emphasis on attractive women. Can combine 1 & 2 to save time.

Went out to do this tonight at a mall and target (the biddies are always at target). Intended to get 25 eye contacts and hello's in an hour. No luck. Only got 1 'hi' and a lot of eye contacts. Didn't go for hello or conversation though because they weren't attractive women so I wasn't interested. We'll try again tomorrow.

Did 3 approaches this week, got 3 numbers. 2nd girl was very attractive, let's say ... a 8.5, but she wasn't very interested. I asked for her number anyways. "Well can I get your number, maybe we can hang out sometime" (boooo). She thought about it for 10 years and then gave it to me. I'll hit her up next week. 3rd girl was cool, gonna text her tomorrow - I'm playing around with the 'when to text' thing. It's an arbitrary thing but we'll see what happens.

Going out to try again on the exercises tomorrow. Eye contact with people is tough because people are weird and don't want to make eye contact.

Is this a actual boot camp lol

 

[GrowingPains]

Is this a actual boot camp lol

Yyyyyyyah!