DJ Bootcamp 2019

[GrowingPains]

Alright mates, my first week of my 'new life' is coming to an end. It's just me out here; I'm on the other side of the country in a new state, new university, new everything.

Let's jump right in. Class is in session.

I'll post in this thread the results/thoughts of each week by Sunday night each week including this one. I've been working on holding eye contact and saying 'hi' to strangers which are the focuses of this week's exercises before today but I'll exclude those.

Advice, banter, and 'classmates' welcome.

Goals:


Week 1:


Quotes from the text I like:

"You say you want to meet girls. OK. But how hard do you try? I mean really try? I believe some of you approach maybe one to two girls a month, get blown off, get discouraged, go home and pout about it, then beat your meat. Do you honestly expect any success for being so lazy?"

"No, gentlemen, the disgrace of men is in not embracing your true nature: following your passion and, thus, loving life. Women are to enhance your life, not to be your life."

"Nice Guys think, "Does she like me? How do I get her to like me?" Good guys think, "Should I like her? Should I go for her?""
- I found this particularly interesting and it goes along with Pook's "Kill that desperation" article. I notice that in conversations or even observing women, I tend to think about whether she'll like me. I am changing the way I think to be whether she's worth my time and whether I like her enough to ask for her number rather than if she likes me enough to give it to me. My mindset needs work. I know I'm a catch, but most of the time I don't act like it. For example; asking for her phone number instead of telling her I want it.

Exercises:

1) Hold eye contact for 1 second longer than the other person with 50 strangers, 2) say hi to 50 strangers - emphasis on attractive women. Can combine 1 & 2 to save time.

Went out to do this tonight at a mall and target (the biddies are always at target). Intended to get 25 eye contacts and hello's in an hour. No luck. Only got 1 'hi' and a lot of eye contacts. Didn't go for hello or conversation though because they weren't attractive women so I wasn't interested. We'll try again tomorrow.

Did 3 approaches this week, got 3 numbers. 2nd girl was very attractive, let's say ... a 8.5, but she wasn't very interested. I asked for her number anyways. "Well can I get your number, maybe we can hang out sometime" (boooo). She thought about it for 10 years and then gave it to me. I'll hit her up next week. 3rd girl was cool, gonna text her tomorrow - I'm playing around with the 'when to text' thing. It's an arbitrary thing but we'll see what happens.

Going out to try again on the exercises tomorrow. Eye contact with people is tough because people are weird and don't want to make eye contact.

 

[GrowingPains]

Edit: I'll post updates when I complete the task. School's putting me in an arm bar already. Went out again though, still not very populated at the mall. I'll just do it throughout the day on campus this week.

 

[GrowingPains]

Been working on this throughout the week. Instead of going out of my way to complete the task I just focus on it throughout the day.

I'll keep working on it but I think it's time to move on to week 2. People are still weird and seem to purposely avoid eye contact which makes it hard to even get to the point of saying hi as well. I'm still not 100% with it myself, I notice that I'll still look away from people when I'm not actively thinking about it or if someone looks at me for longer than a couple seconds, especially an attractive woman, I'll look away. Sometimes I do well and smile back, usually when I'm feeling good about myself. Wearing clothes that make me feel good and having a good day as far as my personal goals go.

Went salsa dancing yesterday. There was a free class. It was fun. Definitely a bit out of the comfort zone but it's all good. Plenty of beautiful women there. I mention it specifically because in dancing you're supposed to look in your partner's eyes. Most of the girls I danced with did not look back into my eyes, which made me feel weird just like when I'm trying to make eye contact in public. Weirdos making me feel weird. The only person who held eye contact was an older Spanish woman. All the 20somethings looked to the side.

Millennials seem to be extremely uncomfortable with the intimacy associated with eye contact. I'll contribute it to the digital age. Oh well, just means I'll be even better off for working on it myself.

Week 2, let's get it.

 

[redskinsfan92]

See, I like this thread. This is helpful

 

[steelpulse]

Don't be too "gamey" in college. Play it cool. Be normal.

The DJ Bible is more "normal" than typical PUA stuff but it can still be over the top for social circle environments like college.

 

[GrowingPains]

Don't be too "gamey" in college. Play it cool. Be normal.

The DJ Bible is more "normal" than typical PUA stuff but it can still be over the top for social circle environments like college.

Can you be more specific about what you mean? The response is a bit vague, examples would help me understand what you're trying to say.

 

[GrowingPains]

Week 2:

Haven't finished the readings yet but this week is focused on starting conversations with strangers. Had a few this morning.

Will briefly detail those in a moment but first: There was a cute girl in the dining hall. I wanted to talk to her, with no goal in mind other than getting to know her. But I couldn't think of anything to say. I felt so paralyzed by this and it has happened before. I start to get stuck between "If there's nothing to say to her, don't sweat it/force it" and "But I have this urge to talk to her why don't you just say something simple and do it". Then next thing I know I hesitated too long. Usually I want to bring up something interesting about them or what's going on around us but I can't always think of it immediately. I'm resolving to just say "Hi... what's your name?" And go with the "Where are you from/what are you majoring in/etc" type questions if I can't think of anything instead of freezing up.

"Hesitation is like masturbation: in the end you're only screwing yourself." - Young Juan

I went to get tea after the dining hall. When I was leaving, I saw a group of female athletes chillin' at the coffee shop. Two of them were laughing very hard but squaring up like they were about to fight. I asked if they were gonna fight (they just put their arms inside their hoodies and were flailing the arms at each other, not actually fighting lol idk) and told them they needed a referee. We all had a good time, I introduced myself and bounced. One of the girls asked if I was a student in the graduate school of business - I think that means I dress well, iono.

15 mins later someone asked where I got my tea since the university is closed for holiday. We chatted for a bit and found we had a mutual friend. They were nice people, I didn't really initiate this convo but it was fun to chat to some more people.

Looking forward to chatting with more people today. As I speak to more people, I notice that a more social vibe surfaces and I'm less inclined to hesitate. Makes sense, that's how it is with everything else.

 

[steelpulse]

Can you be more specific about what you mean? The response is a bit vague, examples would help me understand what you're trying to say.

Most of "game" is structured for night game and/or cold approaches. This means lots of ADD drunks, quick hookups, "flash" game.

You want to develop some rapport. You are part of the in-group, not some random guy surrounded by drunks.

 

[GrowingPains]

Most of "game" is structured for night game and/or cold approaches. This means lots of ADD drunks, quick hookups, "flash" game.

You want to develop some rapport. You are part of the in-group, not some random guy surrounded by drunks.

Right... what you're saying doesn't make sense. So...



It's just that the things I posted from the DJ Bootcamp pertain to being confident; making better eye contact and being able to hold conversations with anyone. Of course, with a focus on women. That's great advice. And what you're saying is don't be weird like a PUA... then something about drunk people... I... what?



Anyways, back on topic...

 

[steelpulse]

View attachment 2233

View attachment 2234

Yeah it makes perfect sense now.

 

[Pogejr]

I believe what steelpulse is trying to say is that you don’t need to be super try-hard with the PUA tactics in college. Most of what the DJ Bible teaches you is for post-college life, where you don’t automatically have social proof by virtue of being a student at the same university as the young lady you’re talking to.

With meeting women out in bars or cold-approaching, the techniques outlined in the DJ Bible work because they establish you as a high-value individual and give you a frame of reference to have an INTERESTING DISCUSSION with the lady. That’s not to say the techniques won’t work in a college setting, but sometimes they may come across as over the top.

A lot of people say it’s easier to meet women in college and I believe it’s true. This is a really good thread and I’m glad you’re taking these steps to better yourself. Keep going with the exercises because they will help you in general, but don’t feel like you need to be “that way” 100% of the time. The hesitation you felt a few posts back is important to unpack internally.

Most people in college are looking to make friends and expand their social group. The fact that you’re approaching puts you ahead of a lot of your peers and in a few months you should have a decent social group that will lead to you interacting with a lot more attractive women. However, you shouldn’t go over the top because PUA tactics (as described by the DJ Bible) are for quick, short-term lays and this behavior may have the opposite effect of building a social group that enjoys your company. Your goal should be to develop an OUTGOING and INTERESTING personality that people want to hang around. I really think this is important because if you can get this right, the rest of your life will be a lot easier with women.

 

[GrowingPains]

I gotcha.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Nice journal bro. I’ve been thinking about doing something structured like this in the future to improve my Approach Game as well. Looking forward to seeing you complete it!

 

[GrowingPains]

Ran into one of the girls from the coffee shop today. The other day she said "oh wow it's a match made in heaven" after I said what I was studying which happened to be the same as one of the other girls. Today she wanted to add me to a groupchat with the other girl and said the other girl would really like that. Kinda odd, but I said aigh whatever. So we're talking in this groupchat and it's mainly me and the girl that added me talking. Odd. I'm really just trynna meet the rest of their team and hang out with some athlete chicks. They haven't said anything in a while but maybe I'll invite em to hang out this weekend.

Talked to a girl in my class. Foreign ting. Probably just going to leave this one at being friends, my mind is already distracted enough in class. But if she wanna suck this d!ck I aint gon' stop her.

Complimented a girl's watch. She looked up then back at her phone. I kept it moving.

Met a girl in the dining hall, talked to her about general stuff. What she was wearing, where she's from, what shes up to for the night. Texted myself from her phone 'hey cutie' and saved my name as 'super sexy my name'. She laughed. I responded an hour later w/ something like 'thats all you've got?? How do you spell your name btw' because I forgot her name lmao.

I've noticed that when I'm not getting messages to my phone I start to feel like I've done something wrong and start over thinking stuff. Working on not caring, I admit it is a big challenge. Partially because I'm in a new area and don't know a lot of people. Mostly because I care too much and have some desperation I'm trying to get rid of.

Stay tuned.

 

[GrowingPains]

Eating breakfast at the dining hall, vibing to some Blueface, chillin' nahmean. Thicc chick comes and sits near da boi. Once she's settled in I asked her about the instrument she was holding. We talked about her violin lessons, favorite song to play, where she's from (European country with bread and pastries, take a guess), US vs Pastry Country, blah blah. Was a good 7 minute convo, but she wasn't looking back at me and that sh!t was weird af. She was on the opposite side of the table and 2 seats diagonal of me but would only make glancing eye contact every few minutes. Guys, please look at the person you're talking to, not into the distance. These milennials man... Told her I had to go for class but to give me her number (win! instead of asking for it I finally told them to give it to me). She said she 'kinda' has a boyfriend but we could do the friends thing. I said aigh and just got it anyways (1. I do need to make friends so it's all good 2. Maybe I could've said never mind and said "It's cool, I'll just see you around" which would've shown I'm willing to walk away and am higher value? Idk what do you lot think?). I pressed a lil bit to figure out if this boyfriend was real, just asked how long they've been dating and left it at that. Got the digits and bounced. No stress, on to the next one.

Edit: During the convo I let there be silence for a little while to gauge her interest. If she said something, then I could assume some level of interest. But she didn't which correlates to the end result. Tried this with the girl from my class yesterday and she asked me a question. Useful tactic, I think.

 

[redskinsfan92]

Eating breakfast at the dining hall, vibing to some Blueface, chillin' nahmean. Thicc chick comes and sits near da boi. Once she's settled in I asked her about the instrument she was holding. We talked about her violin lessons, favorite song to play, where she's from (European country with bread and pastries, take a guess), US vs Pastry Country, blah blah. Was a good 7 minute convo, but she wasn't looking back at me and that sh!t was weird af. She was on the opposite side of the table and 2 seats diagonal of me but would only make glancing eye contact every few minutes. Guys, please look at the person you're talking to, not into the distance. These milennials man... Told her I had to go for class but to give me her number (win! instead of asking for it I finally told them to give it to me). She said she 'kinda' has a boyfriend but we could do the friends thing. I said aigh and just got it anyways (1. I do need to make friends so it's all good 2. Maybe I could've said never mind and said "It's cool, I'll just see you around" which would've shown I'm willing to walk away and am higher value? Idk what do you lot think?). I pressed a lil bit to figure out if this boyfriend was real, just asked how long they've been dating and left it at that. Got the digits and bounced. No stress, on to the next one.

Friends with benefits sounds cool to me!

 

[GrowingPains]

Went for a study break, talked to a guy in the juice shop. He ended up being from the same state I'm from. Wild considering it's on the other side of the country. There was a girl there too and I could've spoken to her but I didn't have anything to say to her. That's aight, it would've been forced and instead I had a good time chatting with this lad.

Still need to find some time to keep reading this week's material. But socializing and having conversations is going well. I'm chatting with plenty of people playing pick up soccer but we won't count those, they're easy dubs.

 

[GrowingPains]

Saw a girl on my way out of the dining hall to get to class. I wish I could've chatted with her but hey... I got places to be lil baby. Next time I see a baddie I'm pouncing, believe that.

On my way to class a girl zipped past me, walking fast as hell. So I, huuahh, sped up to see what's to shawty. I told her she was walking fast so I was gonna walk with her to get to class faster since I was a couple mins late. She laughed and said cool. Shot the sh!t. Went to class.

 

[nicksaiz65]

You’re doing great bro, I need to start doing Campus approaches like you. You listen to Lil Baby by any chance?

 

[GrowingPains]

You’re doing great bro, I need to start doing Campus approaches like you. You listen to Lil Baby by any chance?

'ppreciate it bro. I'm looking forward to the approaches turning into plates one day in the future but you know... In due time.

Yes, indeed! Haha I know a couple lil baby songs but the stuff I was saying in that post that probably made you think of him is from Blueface. I've been bumping his stuff lately. He's funny and some of the stuff is vibes.