nicksaiz65 Odyssey

[nicksaiz65]

2/2/19: Revelations Part 3

I'm still typing up the notes from this Skype session. Bear with me guys.

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Q4.) How do you feel about group dates or party dates? What is your definition of a date?

A4.) If you bring a girl out in a group, that's fine, but you need to make sure that she knows it's a DATE. Maybe you could do this by explicitly saying the word date when you go to hang out with her. As long as you are building attraction and she feels safe and comfortable around you, that's good. There's no reason that you can't split off later from the group at the date. However, one sentiment that I very much agree with from PUA is "never bring a girl to the club."

Q5.) How can I learn rhythm and how to dance to modern rap music? It seems to be pretty important these days for seduction.

A5.) I'm definitely not the best person to ask this question, but continuing to practice with YouTube tutorials and music videos would be good. You might also consider taking private dance lessons. Also, consider doing salsa or swing dancing. They have a lot of carry-over to any kind of dancing, and plus girls love it when you know how to use your hips.

Q6.) How would I get with the more promiscuous party girls? Would simply taking them out to coffee be too "safe" a date?

A6.) That's totally fine if you want to bring a "party girl" on a more lowkey date like that. Although I will say that you should go for the girls that you have a connection with, not just the "highest social value" ones. If you'd like to bring a date to a house party too, that's perfectly fine. However, when you go on dates, you want to make sure that you go for exciting and engaging over just pleasant. But go for it on asking party girls on coffee dates? If they're bored and they don't like it, that's their problem, not yours. Ideally in a date, you want to have a chance to have some banter and antagonistic flirting, if that's your style. One on one dates are ideal, you want it to be an actual date instead of just "oh we're just here together." As for date ideas, since you're in college, the possibilities are endless. There are so many events, like concerts and Open Mic Nights. If your college has a Subreddit or newspaper, you can literally look things up from in there and get date ideas. Concerts can be great dates too because there's lots of singing and dancing, very exciting.

Q7.) In general, how long do you think a typical Cold Approach should be?

A7.) I'd say that just depends on how long she is engaged. I'll ride the interaction until it starts to die down, and then I'll go. Ideally, you want to leave on a high note and leave her wanting more instead of staying too long. When you get her number, you'd ideally want to pre-sell something as well. Like hey, I'm going to see this cool movie/art exhibit... maybe you'd like to come see it with me?

Q8.) How should I react if a girl I like is thirst trapping overtly over social media?

A8.) You can certainly flirt with her. You can give her a compliment, but don't escalate it just yet, especially if you don't have a relationship with her yet. If you just come up to her all thirsty or just instantly ask her to come over, that's a great way to get shut down. They're just posting because they can. Also, when you compliment her, maybe compliment her on something that isn't her looks. Like "that's a really nice shot" or "I really like your outfit." Something that she had a hand in, instead of just winning the genetic lottery.

Q9.) Is "you're cute" ever a thing? Over Snapchat and in person.

A9.) That's totally fine as long as you don't overuse it. It's definitely a form of flirting. Don't worry too much about fighting with girls with frame control games. If you're doing that all the time, she probably just doesn't like you. However, once again, it's probably better to compliment someone on something that they actively had a hand in, like their hair or amazing style.

Q10.) I know I'm supposed to text girls intermittently with value giving texts while courting them. But how much is that? How do you know how often to text a girl?

A10.) You just have to do this by feel, on a case by case basis. You're having a conversation with them while you're courting them, so why not talk? The most important thing is that you actually give them something to respond to that isn't super boring. As cheesy as the line "Hey, I just saw your evil twin" is, it actually does work. You need to keep the emotional momentum going. You want something that is coherent, and also within the context of something that you talked about within your conversation, ideally. After a while, you can go pretty much wherever you want with your texts. Remember that all you're trying to do with your opening is start a conversation.

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One more post and then we're done!

 

[nicksaiz65]

Honestly i think Java is very overrated. Not because its a bad language per se, but because a much better one exists in C#.

A little background...when Java first came out Microsoft was very very excited about it. So excited, in fact, they asked Sun Microsystems if they could help add features and upgrades to Java. Sun told them to go kick rocks and then sat around celebrating, reading their press clippings and patting themselves on the back for the next 5 years.

While this was happening, undetterred, Microsoft basically said "F you", we will build our own version of "Java" except build it bigger and better and have it as part of a framework that include multiple other languages as well. This became C#. At some point about 10 years ago C# blew past Java in terms of features and things you are able to do and has never looked back. If this was a race, Java is so far behind at this point when C# turns around to see how much of a lead they have, Java can't even be seen anymore, they have fallen so far off the horizon.

Up until the point .Net Core was released Java clung to the last remaining feature(which granted was a huge feature) that because of the Java Virtual Machine, their code was write once run anywhere. You could run it on any system, not only for Windows like C# was limited to.

Now they dont even have that any more as .Net Core provides the same functionality of write once run anywhere. For all intents and purposes C# is what Java SHOULD have become if they didn't sit on their ass while Microsoft blew right past them.

There may be some scenarios where Java would be preferable to C# these days but not many. Java is very clunky in comparison to C# and requires more code. The reason why it is so popular still is becaue of all the initial applications built when it first came out and legacy code. Nobody is going to port millions of lines of stable Java code debugged and tested over the past 15-20 years to C#. And I dont blame them, they would be foolish to. But for people wanting enterprise solutions built from the ground up these days, I would use C# 98/100.

You can find articles like this all over the web:

https://blog.overops.com/c-vs-java-5-irreplaceable-c-features-wed-kill-to-have-in-java/

This went a little long, I'll post my thoughts on OOP in another post.

I worked in C# back in the day and remember liking it. Weirdly, I never hear anyone in the Computer Science Department talk about it. I'll get back into it, seems very useful to have in my programming repertoire.

And I don't mind the posts being long at all. I find the history behind all this to be very interesting.

 

[nicksaiz65]

2/2/19: Revelations Part 4

Q11.) So Mixed Signals = Low Interest. But how do I know when to drop a certain prospect vs actively trying to raise her interest?

A11.) One thing that you can do is actively call out mixed signals, such as "Am I missing something?" Communicate with her, you're both adults, use your words. Also, you shouldn't worry so much about playing frame games or "who cares less wins." As long as you don't drool or act desperate, showing interest can be good.

Q12.) Can you tell me more about "Enthusiastic Consent?"

A12.) It's all in the way you phrase it. If you say "Uh, can I have sex with you?" It's going to dead the mood instantly. But if you whisper "I'm trying so hard not to fvck you right now, is that okay?" right into her ear, she'll instantly become moist.

Q13.) When I see a girl that I like, do I start flirting with her right away? Or do I be friendly, get to know her, and then start flirting? Do I ask her out instantly?

A13.) Keep in mind that you could always flirt in a lowkey kind of way from the start and then work your way up. They key to avoiding the friend zone is just making sure that she understands that you don't want a platonic friendship with her. If you ask her out, 90% of girls will understand that you're looking for more than just a platonic friendship. On top of that, always assume attraction.

Q14.) How do you feel about hooking up with drunk girls? I've had some issues with this in the past.

A14.) You don't really want to make moves on girls who are obviously drunk. Not only is it a bad idea, but whenever you're heavily intoxicated like that, you're nowhere near as smooth as you think you are. If she's really into you, she'll fvck you sober. I'd say that the only time you should fvck a drunk girl is when you're in a relationship with her and consent is implied. I always say, too drunk to drive too drunk to consent.

--------------------
But that's the whole interview guys. I'm super glad that I booked this call with him. I learned a lot about Game from it, and hopefully you readers can learn from my notes as well. I'm going to apply this knowledge to my life and I'm sure I'll see massive improvements.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Well guys, that big flurry of posts is pretty much done. Now until Monday morning, my school focus is gonna be exclusively on this Databases homework. It’s due the soonest and I need a 100 on it to be great.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I need to go to more parties and work on my social life more before I end up being a recluse.. hard to do at the same time school though. Also hard to do with a low self esteem...

 

[marmel75]

Object Oriented Programming:

Honestly im not exactly sure anymore what to think about OOP. I know it sounds like heresy but I've seen OOP go wrong a few times to know that if its not built well at the foundational level and well thought out, OOP can cause a lot more bad than good down the line. When its well done it is great. The problem is its not well done all the time. Or even a lot of the time. Maybe half the time. And when you realize that you would need to rewrite a program nearly from scratch because you fvcked up the OOP design when modifications or changes are required, you quickly see OOP isnt all fuzzy blankets and cozy kittens like its made out to be.

The problem isn't necessarily with the OOP itself bit in the design of it by the people creating it. Too many times it ends up becoming a jumbled up spider web that ends up being difficult to untangle when needed. When one class depends on another that depends on another, etc etc etc...yes it boils down to improper design but that's the crux of the problem. In CS classes they spend infinite time teaching worthless BS like sorting and search algorithms but precious little time on important things like proper design and proper OOP principles like SOLID. In 12 years I have NEVER EVER had to code a sorting or searching algorithm by hand. Languages already have theae available and even if I needed to implement a custom one for some reason I could simply aearch google and find 1000's of implementations to copy and paste verbatim. Learning these are a complete waste of time. If I ever went to a code interview and they ask you to code one I would literally pull out my phone search for it and copy and paste it in front of them and tell them "I would never waste my time memorizing something like this when I can simply find it within 5 seconds online".


The reason they ask these dumbass questions is because they know colleges teach it and they want to see if you were paying attention in class. If colleges would stop wasting time with stupid sh!t that has no real world application they would stop asking them. They teach about the "pillars of OOP" like encapsulation, polymorphism and inheritance but they don't get to the root of HOW it all works. In C# the fundamental root of OOP is dynamic dispatch and the "this" object, but they never actually talk anything about this...its like they show you the nice fancy packaging but dont let you see inside.

But i digress. In some ways functional programming might be better than OOP. Fragile base classes, tight coupling and poor overall design are all common OOP design flaws.

Her is an article that explains some things in more detail. I'm not saying OOP is all bad, I actually use it and like it for the most part but dont believe its the end all and be all for programming because it isn't.

https://blog.learningtree.com/functional-programming-object-orientated-programming/

 

[nicksaiz65]

Object Oriented Programming:

Honestly im not exactly sure anymore what to think about OOP. I know it sounds like heresy but I've seen OOP go wrong a few times to know that if its not built well at the foundational level and well thought out, OOP can cause a lot more bad than good down the line. When its well done it is great. The problem is its not well done all the time. Or even a lot of the time. Maybe half the time. And when you realize that you would need to rewrite a program nearly from scratch because you fvcked up the OOP design when modifications or changes are required, you quickly see OOP isnt all fuzzy blankets and cozy kittens like its made out to be.

The problem isn't necessarily with the OOP itself bit in the design of it by the people creating it. Too many times it ends up becoming a jumbled up spider web that ends up being difficult to untangle when needed. When one class depends on another that depends on another, etc etc etc...yes it boils down to improper design but that's the crux of the problem. In CS classes they spend infinite time teaching worthless BS like sorting and search algorithms but precious little time on important things like proper design and proper OOP principles like SOLID. In 12 years I have NEVER EVER had to code a sorting or searching algorithm by hand. Languages already have theae available and even if I needed to implement a custom one for some reason I could simply aearch google and find 1000's of implementations to copy and paste verbatim. Learning these are a complete waste of time. If I ever went to a code interview and they ask you to code one I would literally pull out my phone search for it and copy and paste it in front of them and tell them "I would never waste my time memorizing something like this when I can simply find it within 5 seconds online".


The reason they ask these dumbass questions is because they know colleges teach it and they want to see if you were paying attention in class. If colleges would stop wasting time with stupid sh!t that has no real world application they would stop asking them. They teach about the "pillars of OOP" like encapsulation, polymorphism and inheritance but they don't get to the root of HOW it all works. In C# the fundamental root of OOP is dynamic dispatch and the "this" object, but they never actually talk anything about this...its like they show you the nice fancy packaging but dont let you see inside.

But i digress. In some ways functional programming might be better than OOP. Fragile base classes, tight coupling and poor overall design are all common OOP design flaws.

Her is an article that explains some things in more detail. I'm not saying OOP is all bad, I actually use it and like it for the most part but dont believe its the end all and be all for programming because it isn't.

https://blog.learningtree.com/functional-programming-object-orientated-programming/

Thanks for the writeup, very informative. It’s really funny you mention that about the CS classes though. We spent most of our last course writing Stacks and Queues with Arrays and Linked Lists, and learning how to do those sorting algorithms lol.

I guess OOP would be best viewed as just another tool in my programming toolbox.

Also you make C# sound more and more intriguing every day

 

[GrowingPains]

Object Oriented Programming:

Honestly im not exactly sure anymore what to think about OOP. I know it sounds like heresy but I've seen OOP go wrong a few times to know that if its not built well at the foundational level and well thought out, OOP can cause a lot more bad than good down the line. When its well done it is great. The problem is its not well done all the time. Or even a lot of the time. Maybe half the time. And when you realize that you would need to rewrite a program nearly from scratch because you fvcked up the OOP design when modifications or changes are required, you quickly see OOP isnt all fuzzy blankets and cozy kittens like its made out to be.

The problem isn't necessarily with the OOP itself bit in the design of it by the people creating it. Too many times it ends up becoming a jumbled up spider web that ends up being difficult to untangle when needed. When one class depends on another that depends on another, etc etc etc...yes it boils down to improper design but that's the crux of the problem. In CS classes they spend infinite time teaching worthless BS like sorting and search algorithms but precious little time on important things like proper design and proper OOP principles like SOLID. In 12 years I have NEVER EVER had to code a sorting or searching algorithm by hand. Languages already have theae available and even if I needed to implement a custom one for some reason I could simply aearch google and find 1000's of implementations to copy and paste verbatim. Learning these are a complete waste of time. If I ever went to a code interview and they ask you to code one I would literally pull out my phone search for it and copy and paste it in front of them and tell them "I would never waste my time memorizing something like this when I can simply find it within 5 seconds online".


The reason they ask these dumbass questions is because they know colleges teach it and they want to see if you were paying attention in class. If colleges would stop wasting time with stupid sh!t that has no real world application they would stop asking them. They teach about the "pillars of OOP" like encapsulation, polymorphism and inheritance but they don't get to the root of HOW it all works. In C# the fundamental root of OOP is dynamic dispatch and the "this" object, but they never actually talk anything about this...its like they show you the nice fancy packaging but dont let you see inside.

But i digress. In some ways functional programming might be better than OOP. Fragile base classes, tight coupling and poor overall design are all common OOP design flaws.

Her is an article that explains some things in more detail. I'm not saying OOP is all bad, I actually use it and like it for the most part but dont believe its the end all and be all for programming because it isn't.

https://blog.learningtree.com/functional-programming-object-orientated-programming/

Careful calling stuff courses teach as unnecessary.

Yes, colleges teach you the minor details and sometimes it seems like a waste of time especially when there are things that do that basic thing for you (ie; search algorithms). But the point of understanding the basic things is so that you understand how to use them, manipulate them, and solve issues associated with them.

You cannot escape knowing the basics if you want to be great at something. You can if you want to be alright. Recall my earlier example of being a chef vs. a cook. A software programming chef can write the search algorithm from scratch. He can also understand the concepts of why the search algorithm works, write entirely new algorithms using those same basic concepts, or apply the search algorithm in new ways. The cook can only take the pre-made search algorithm and do a limited number of implementations - he's lost his creativity because he didn't understand the basic concepts of the algorithm.

Now, there is something to be said for colleges lacking the practical aspect of learning. They certainly miss out on the practical application and experimental learning that would make people much better candidates for jobs and effective employees. But again, just because the basics are rarely used (although I think you'd find that very high level programmers are revisiting the basics all of the time) doesn't mean they aren't important.

 

[marmel75]

Careful calling stuff courses teach as unnecessary.

Yes, colleges teach you the minor details and sometimes it seems like a waste of time especially when there are things that do that basic thing for you (ie; search algorithms). But the point of understanding the basic things is so that you understand how to use them, manipulate them, and solve issues associated with them.

You cannot escape knowing the basics if you want to be great at something. You can if you want to be alright. Recall my earlier example of being a chef vs. a cook. A software programming chef can write the search algorithm from scratch. He can also understand the concepts of why the search algorithm works, write entirely new algorithms using those same basic concepts, or apply the search algorithm in new ways. The cook can only take the pre-made search algorithm and do a limited number of implementations - he's lost his creativity because he didn't understand the basic concepts of the algorithm.

Now, there is something to be said for colleges lacking the practical aspect of learning. They certainly miss out on the practical application and experimental learning that would make people much better candidates for jobs and effective employees. But again, just because the basics are rarely used (although I think you'd find that very high level programmers are revisiting the basics all of the time) doesn't mean they aren't important.

I dont need to be careful, I'm a senior software engineer. I do it everyday. And nobody I know uses these algorithms. Just like I've talked to many automotive engineers regarding limits and calculus and they say they haven't used it for 40 years since they got out of school.

Obviously I COULD write one if I wanted to but why would you want to? Yes they teach you about time complexity and best, worst and average case scenarios for running times and the same for insertion, removal etc...

Are these concepts important? Yes, but you could learn the same thing WHILE actually learning something useful that you could use in day to day work. That's the problem I have. You could be learning something useful but they choose not to teach it, still using the same tired stuff from 1990.

The problem in computer science is you don't actually build anything of use. Imho, I would hire a person who builds working programs over a CS grad 100 times out of 100. Real life isn't fantasy land.

Just like how Generic Lists are faster than linked lists in practice most times and much easier to work with. Just like how Dictionaries are orders of magnitude faster than Hashtables. CS departments need to update their couses and stop teaching 30 year old things that have been replaced by better iterations of them. This is why a lot of CS grads get out school and cant even code their way out of a paper bag most times. Too much theory and not enough real world.

 

[GrowingPains]

I dont need to be careful, I'm a senior software engineer. I do it everyday. And nobody I know uses these algorithms. Just like I've talked to many automotive engineers regarding limits and calculus and they say they haven't used it for 40 years since they got out of school.

Obviously I COULD write one if I wanted to but why would you want to? Yes they teach you about time complexity and best, worst and average case scenarios for running times and the same for insertion, removal etc...

Are these concepts important? Yes, but you could learn the same thing WHILE actually learning something useful that you could use in day to day work. That's the problem I have. You could be learning something useful but they choose not to teach it, still using the same tired stuff from 1990.

The problem in computer science is you don't actually build anything of use. Imho, I would hire a person who builds working programs over a CS grad 100 times out of 100. Real life isn't fantasy land.

Just like how Generic Lists are faster than linked lists in practice most times and much easier to work with. Just like how Dictionaries are orders of magnitude faster than Hashtables. CS departments need to update their couses and stop teaching 30 year old things that have been replaced by better iterations of them. This is why a lot of CS grads get out school and cant even code their way out of a paper bag most times. Too much theory and not enough real world.

I understand what you're saying. And I agree that there needs to be more practicality in academia.

I'm cautioning Nick that if he wants to perform at a high level, it is important to know the basics. That's all. You may disagree, but this is just my philosophy and has proven true in my experience.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I can see both sides of the coin on what you guys are saying. For myself, I think it's important that I learn what they teach me in school, even if only for the academic and GPA Merits. I think there is some useful stuff to be found in there. However, I will say that all the best programmers that I know are usually self taught. They study and learn programming on their own time instead of just relying on what the school teaches them. So I'll have to do the school stuff, but if I really want to know how to code, I'm going to have to dig deeper.

 

[marmel75]

I understand what you're saying. And I agree that there needs to be more practicality in academia.

I'm cautioning Nick that if he wants to perform at a high level, it is important to know the basics. That's all. You may disagree, but this is just my philosophy and has proven true in my experience.

I don't disagree the concepts are important I disagree with their methods of teaching them

 

[nicksaiz65]

Databases Homework
Well chaps, pray for me. I have my first Databases homework assignment due at 12 AM tonight. It's worth 10% of my Grade. I'll be able to finish it, that's all that my focus is on today. I'm listening to Classical Music all day as genius fuel. I'll update you guys after I turn it in. It's amazing how much more this stuff makes sense when I use resources like TutorialsPoint and YouTube.

 

[GrowingPains]

Cut my hair today bro. Feeling like a million bucks too, maybe I'll bless a b!tch with some of this swag today haha.

Anyways, cut is a high bald fade with about a inch of hair on top. Curl brushed it. I took a liiiiittle bit too much off in one spot and i can definitely get better at blending the fade but I'm looking forward to getting better. Saved a mean $25. Took me 2 hours because I was being very cautious and learning but yknow... it'll get better. Taking off less and being careful is the best advice I got on YouTube. You can take hair off but you can't put it back on lol.

Might try to adjust my clippers and try some different techniques once I get better. Like flicking the lever as I erase the fade line. Might try edging up with a razor but we not there yet. I'm hype af.

Edit: Thanks for inspiring me to get back on it.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Cut my hair today bro. Feeling like a million bucks too, maybe I'll bless a b!tch with some of this swag today haha.

Anyways, cut is a high bald fade with about a inch of hair on top. Curl brushed it. I took a liiiiittle bit too much off in one spot and i can definitely get better at blending the fade but I'm looking forward to getting better. Saved a mean $25. Took me 2 hours because I was being very cautious and learning but yknow... it'll get better. Taking off less and being careful is the best advice I got on YouTube. You can take hair off but you can't put it back on lol.

Might try to adjust my clippers and try some different techniques once I get better. Like flicking the lever as I erase the fade line. Might try edging up with a razor but we not there yet. I'm hype af.

Edit: Thanks for inspiring me to get back on it.

Nice bro! Self Cutting is great. You're gonna mess up at first for sure, but after that you can get fresh whenever you want for free. If you're serious, you might wanna drop the $150 on a Self Cut System 2.0 to make your life way easier. It pays for itself after a few cuts.

Nothing wrong with taking your time. Work slow. As long as it looks fresh it's all good. And man, I used to love cutting bald fades. They were fresh and they feel so nice. If I weren't working on being a 360 Waver, I would most definitely rock a bald fade with some waves on top again.

When blending out the line, always flick out so you can get that transition. It may help to use the corner of the blade as well so you don't go up too high. Personally, when I would do bald fades, I liked my guidelines straight. That way you can't get lost. Also, keep that bald line low so you can give yourself room for a bigger transition.

And no problem man! I need to get back into cutting myself again but it's harder now that I'm rocking a 360 Wave cut. I'll get back to it someday though, probably once my waves come in deeper.

DM me a pic of the cut!

 

[GrowingPains]

Aighh I gotchu when I get home.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Databases Homework

I am absolutely beat. I just spent the last 10 hours programming for my Databases class. I was able to solve every problem out of the 15 except the final one and the extra credit. That classical music really helped me keep grinding. And I’m not done yet because I have a quiz and lab due in Unix tomorrow. I’m taking a video game break, Dating video break, brush break, and might have sex before I start all of that mess though.

Had I started this 3 days earlier, I could’ve double checked my work and gotten tutoring to solve the last question and not left points on the table.

No matter what grade I get though, I’m already doing better in this class than last semester. Last semester I made a big fat zero on this homework because I started literally 2 hours before the deadline and couldn’t finish it. Pathetic, I know. I’m working on doing better. This time, I started 3 days out from the deadline.

It’s not enough to just work hard, I have to start early and ask for help. I’ll try to keep that in mind from now on.

EDIT: I know this has nothing to do with this post but I’m considering starting NoFap again

 

[nicksaiz65]

Fvvvvvvvvck.... Messing Up in School

Of course right after I finish the homework my dumb ass crashes and falls asleep. Now I’m not even sure if I’m gonna be able to finish my lab for Unix. I need to start earlier and be more disciplined. Because once again, All Nighters simply do not work. If you’re at the point where you have to pull one, you’ve already lost. Life is kinda like playing a strategy RPG in some ways.

I’ll do the best I can to finish this though... I’ll let y’all know whether I do or not. This is what I get for wasting my Sunday. I don’t have a second to waste, even on weekends.

Also, I should never go to sleep without setting an alarm.

Just trying to learn how to be an adult here...

Pragmatism

Although I will say, this doesn’t always happen. I’ll try my absolute best not to procrastinate and have to stay up all night, but sometimes life gets the best of all of us. I’ve seen this happen to even those “genius” kids. In that case, I just need to have more willpower, stay up, and do the best that I can. Also, the people who I know that had 4.0s would have the energy drinks on deck for situations like this. That way, you can avoid a crash and not put yourself in this situation like I did.

Of course, this doesn’t work for tests. And this is like an emergency situation. You have to try and prevent this kind of sh*t as much as you can.

Although, sometimes you do have to have that willpower and stay up I suppose.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Random Midday Note: Venting Time

Ugh I feel like absolute trash today guys...

I need to know how to cut my hair whenever I want on a whim. I’m looking terrible and I can’t go to the barber until the weekend. I’m still rocking the low temp fade(full deep 360 horseman Level ) but I need to know how to cut it myself so I don’t look just horrible in between barber trips.

Got called out on some fake designer too lmao. I don’t care about designer or any of that crap anymore. I’m just gonna dress simply and nicely like TMF and Alpha M recommend. That will get the job done and it’ll still be fresh. In fact, I’m probably just gonna wear simple yet nice outfits from them that are impossible to screw up. That is when I was the freshest. No designer, and we’ll see what I do about r/FashionReps and stuff like that. On second thought, I’m still gonna use r/FashionReps to save money. I just don’t use it for “hype” pieces. I’m still gonna keep looking into StreetWear and Dressing Dapper though. Like I want some Chelsea Boots and Air Max 97s. Plus, if I hadn’t gone into FashionReps, I never would’ve found velvet shirts and things like that. I just need to make sure my items are PLAUSIBLE and very very close to 1:1 or I’m pretty much dead.

Then there’s the fact that I’m still not a bodybuilder and I can’t use muscles and abs to hide my insecurities...

Sometimes I just feel like I’m not doing anything right in life at all...

I just don’t know what to do to not be seen as a nerdy loser with no friends. And I feel like that’s where I’m headed if I don’t do something fast.

And then there’s the whole issue of my shyt academics, will I even be able to pull my grades up, I gotta save money...

And the fact that I can’t dance. Even if I did make a lit EDM shuffle video, would it even be considered cool? Or would I just be laughed at? Mumble rap is all that’s in these days. I might just look like an idiot. Who even knows? I sure don’t.

I feel like I’m just unsuccessfully using this site to try and break out of the caricature of a loser.

I hate hearing myself in videos. I hate my voice. If I were anyone else I wouldn’t take myself seriously. I sound like such a nerd, idk what to do about that...

As morbid as it is, sometimes I wish I could just die. Sometimes I feel like everything in my life is wrong and I just wanna quit. I don’t know if I can salvage it. I’m literally still insecure and I’m just trying to cover up my insecurities like with a Band Aid. Faking who I am, trying to pretend like I’m someone I’m not... even if I make like a 3.7-3.8 GPA this semester I still don’t think I’ll be happy. And I don’t know what will make me happy. I guess all I can do in the moment is continue to work on school and learn Game.

I’m just gonna sit down and do my homework somewhere. This has been one of the worst days of my life so far. Jeez.

 

[shouldbefun]

Random Midday Note: Venting Time

Ugh I feel like absolute trash today guys...

I need to know how to cut my hair whenever I want on a whim. I’m looking terrible and I can’t go to the barber until the weekend. I’m still rocking the low temp fade(full deep 360 horseman Level ) but I need to know how to cut it myself so I don’t look just horrible in between barber trips.

Got called out on some fake designer too lmao. I don’t care about designer or any of that crap anymore. I’m just gonna dress simply and nicely like TMF and Alpha M recommend. That will get the job done and it’ll still be fresh. In fact, I’m probably just gonna wear simple yet nice outfits from them that are impossible to screw up. That is when I was the freshest. No designer, and we’ll see what I do about r/FashionReps and stuff like that. On second thought, I’m still gonna use r/FashionReps to save money. I just don’t use it for “hype” pieces. I’m still gonna keep looking into StreetWear and Dressing Dapper though. Like I want some Chelsea Boots and Air Max 97s. Plus, if I hadn’t gone into FashionReps, I never would’ve found velvet shirts and things like that. I just need to make sure my items are PLAUSIBLE and very very close to 1:1 or I’m pretty much dead.

Then there’s the fact that I’m still not a bodybuilder and I can’t use muscles and abs to hide my insecurities...

Sometimes I just feel like I’m not doing anything right in life at all...

I just don’t know what to do to not be seen as a nerdy loser with no friends. And I feel like that’s where I’m headed if I don’t do something fast.

And then there’s the whole issue of my shyt academics, will I even be able to pull my grades up, I gotta save money...

And the fact that I can’t dance. Even if I did make a lit EDM shuffle video, would it even be considered cool? Or would I just be laughed at? Mumble rap is all that’s in these days. I might just look like an idiot. Who even knows? I sure don’t.

I feel like I’m just unsuccessfully using this site to try and break out of the caricature of a loser.

I hate hearing myself in videos. I hate my voice. If I were anyone else I wouldn’t take myself seriously. I sound like such a nerd, idk what to do about that...

As morbid as it is, sometimes I wish I could just die. Sometimes I feel like everything in my life is wrong and I just wanna quit. I don’t know if I can salvage it. I’m literally still insecure and I’m just trying to cover up my insecurities like with a Band Aid. Faking who I am, trying to pretend like I’m someone I’m not... even if I make like a 3.7-3.8 GPA this semester I still don’t think I’ll be happy. And I don’t know what will make me happy. I guess all I can do in the moment is continue to work on school and learn Game.

I’m just gonna sit down and do my homework somewhere. This has been one of the worst days of my life so far. Jeez.

About fashion, not sure what you are into but just shop normal clothes. The idea is the plainer the clothes, the better. You don’t want to be a walking billboard with logos screaming everywhere, right ?
Stuff that Ams been talking about has been around before him so its nothing new.