xuzaki
Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2018
- Messages
- 59
- Reaction score
- 43
- Age
- 34
Like many guys here, I discovered the red pill after a traumatic break up where I learned "hypergamy doesn't care". I won't repeat my life story, but it's relevant to say that the terms Beta Game, Scarcity Mentality, and Oneitis all applied to my life up until then. I'm 28.
I quickly went from going five years without sex to spinning plates. I believe I have an abundance mentality now, banging over 10% of my daygame direct approaches on the first or second date. Two plates have been really sweet to me all along, and have become attached. I feel attachment to one, which scares me because it makes me vulnerable. I spend a lot of time these days on self-improvement (gym, reading, comfort-zone challenges, languages, etc) and felt the urge to "drop everyone" and have a month alone, even though I don't see any girl more than once per week. After a few weeks of consideration, today I broke up with the girl I felt attached to. Somehow I thought it would "kill my inner Beta", but I feel like a piece of sh1t. She cared a lot for me, did absolutely nothing wrong, bought me gifts, considered me her boyfriend even though I never reciprocated, and I just dumped her with "you're really great but I need time to be alone".
I set out on this journey to become a better man, and to not get hurt again by Hypergamy, but I never set out to hurt anyone.
- Why do I feel like sh1t? It's not scarcity mentality, so maybe it's the "pain of causing someone else pain"?
- This girl is from Asia. I'm not sure if she understands the whole "covertly communicated non-exclusivity". American girls "get it", but what about possibly hurting foreign girls who seem to assume exclusivity?
- I broke up as nicely/politely as I could imagine, and I think she'd get back together. Anyone here with experience with this? Good/bad idea? My concerns are: (1) the frame wouldn't be the same, and (2) I'd feel hesitant to leave/hurt her a second time.
- How do you guys feel about hurting girls emotionally? I don't mind pumping-&-dumping arrogant Prima Donnas with overinflated egos, but hurting a sweet girl makes me feel like a horrible human being.
My newly unplugged friend told me I should have just made the time/space I needed, and she would have either stuck around or dropped. I now see this would have been a better choice.
I quickly went from going five years without sex to spinning plates. I believe I have an abundance mentality now, banging over 10% of my daygame direct approaches on the first or second date. Two plates have been really sweet to me all along, and have become attached. I feel attachment to one, which scares me because it makes me vulnerable. I spend a lot of time these days on self-improvement (gym, reading, comfort-zone challenges, languages, etc) and felt the urge to "drop everyone" and have a month alone, even though I don't see any girl more than once per week. After a few weeks of consideration, today I broke up with the girl I felt attached to. Somehow I thought it would "kill my inner Beta", but I feel like a piece of sh1t. She cared a lot for me, did absolutely nothing wrong, bought me gifts, considered me her boyfriend even though I never reciprocated, and I just dumped her with "you're really great but I need time to be alone".
I set out on this journey to become a better man, and to not get hurt again by Hypergamy, but I never set out to hurt anyone.
- Why do I feel like sh1t? It's not scarcity mentality, so maybe it's the "pain of causing someone else pain"?
- This girl is from Asia. I'm not sure if she understands the whole "covertly communicated non-exclusivity". American girls "get it", but what about possibly hurting foreign girls who seem to assume exclusivity?
- I broke up as nicely/politely as I could imagine, and I think she'd get back together. Anyone here with experience with this? Good/bad idea? My concerns are: (1) the frame wouldn't be the same, and (2) I'd feel hesitant to leave/hurt her a second time.
- How do you guys feel about hurting girls emotionally? I don't mind pumping-&-dumping arrogant Prima Donnas with overinflated egos, but hurting a sweet girl makes me feel like a horrible human being.
My newly unplugged friend told me I should have just made the time/space I needed, and she would have either stuck around or dropped. I now see this would have been a better choice.
