Should I date this woman which has a boyfriend?

[Ralph33]

I'm confused and don't know what to do. I have never been in a long term relationship.

I talked to a girl that I like a lot at my college, I simply showed interest in knowing her and she immediately liked me, to be clear none of us told each other we love each other or how we feel to one another, but the signs are clear that she's into me since she likes getting near me, the way she talks and her fake laugh at my ****ty jokes.

I started vetting her through social media and observing her from distances, it turns out she has a boyfriend, I indirectly asked her if she has a boyfriend and she said no.
She tries to hide the fact that she has a boyfriend in some certain situation, such as, when some friends near us ask her what her relationship is with this guy she tries to avoid the question or simply says nothing, so I won't know about it.

She told me if we can go hang out together like watch a movie or something. I said yes, but days passed and I never did, we haven't talked much recently.

They are still together. I am more attractive than her boyfriend, but I'm also a boring person that has some loose screws. She's the shy type of girl, she doesn't seem to have many friends either.

I am afraid if I tell her to break up with her boyfriend for me she might regret it later. What if things don't work out with me and her then I'd feel guilty for ruining her relationship with the previous guy.

 

[Ralph33]

Forgot to mention we're both 23.

 

[ItsFate451]

No! She’s a liar and a horrible girlfriend.

She is good fwb material though. Next time she contacts you, invite her over to your place to make dinner or something. If she says yes, than escalate fast. If she says no, tell her to contact you if she changes her mind.

 

[Ralph33]

No! She’s a liar and a horrible girlfriend.

She is good fwb material though. Next time she contacts you, invite her over to your place to make dinner or something. If she says yes, than escalate fast. If she says no, tell her to contact you if she changes her mind.

Sorry for my poor english, but what do you mean by "escalate fast"? And what would be the point of inviting her to my place?

 

[RedScorpion]

Sorry for my poor english, but what do you mean by "escalate fast"? And what would be the point of inviting her to my place?

To **** her.

 

[Glassguy]

Are you having sex with her or not?

 

[jaymbrs]

Most of the girls I dated had a boyfriend when I met them. Some even lived with them. You just need to take her out once or twice and she'll either leave him for you or she won't. Plain and simple. I would also not go on more than 2 dates with her. After the second date, you have to tell her it's either him or you.

 

[Ralph33]

Are you having sex with her or not?

No. Why does this matter?

 

[Ralph33]

Most of the girls I dated had a boyfriend when I met them. Some even lived with them. You just need to take her out once or twice and she'll either leave him for you or she won't. Plain and simple. I would also not go on more than 2 dates with her. After the second date, you have to tell her it's either him or you.

But how can I trust her? That's still cheating?

 

[jaymbrs]

But how can I trust her? That's still cheating?

Cheating is more common than you think. Learn to accept it as a reality. If not then I think you just answered your own question about whether you want to proceed with this one or not.

 

[dude99]

But how can I trust her? That's still cheating?

Never commit to her. She isnt loyal. Take her out. Fack her. Use her for recreation but never commit to her.

She lied about the boyfriend. Want to go out with you. Avoids questions asked of her and wont answer. And this is what you know about.


She is only good for sechs. Nothing more.

 

[Ralph33]

Cheating is more common than you think. Learn to accept it as a reality. If not then I think you just answered your own question about whether you want to proceed with this one or not.

So you're saying it doesn't matter if she's cheating with me on him because either way I'll most likely end up with a cheating women?
Doesn't the the statement "if she cheats on him with you, she'll cheat on you" holds true for the most part? And that weak morality ends with weak-relationship?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

So you're saying it doesn't matter if she's cheating with me on him because either way I'll most likely end up with a cheating women?
Doesn't the the statement "if she cheats on him with you, she'll cheat on you" holds true for the most part? And that weak morality ends with weak-relationship?

For a woman like this it's better she has a boyfriend.

 

[Ralph33]

For a woman like this it's better she has a boyfriend.

I didn't quiet understand what you mean.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I didn't quiet understand what you mean.

You don't want to be her boyfriend. She's going to do excessive shyt with guys on the side and starve the boyfriend.

 

[Glassguy]

No. Why does this matter?

You don't want to be her boyfriend. She's going to do excessive shyt with guys on the side and starve the boyfriend.

Its all that matters. Why would you deal with her set of circumstances if she wasnt/isnt fvcking you?

 

[jaymbrs]

So you're saying it doesn't matter if she's cheating with me on him because either way I'll most likely end up with a cheating women?
Doesn't the the statement "if she cheats on him with you, she'll cheat on you" holds true for the most part? And that weak morality ends with weak-relationship?

I don't believe every situation is black or white. It's called taking a risk, my friend.

 

[Ralph33]

Its all that matters. Why would you deal with her set of circumstances if she wasnt/isnt fvcking you?

I live in a conservative society, Lebanon, where most young women are virgin and don't jump on the chad **** carousel as it is often mentioned in western society except for college grade bar-club goers. This woman I'm talking about doesn't like the nightlife which is great.

She did not tell me that she loves me or ever talked how we feel to each other, but she always like to approach me and I know she likes me from her behavior.

I am just wondering if it is appropriate to date her, tell my feelings to her and ask whether she is ready to leave her boyfriend for me. I've been told that some people need the security of a relationship and won’t leave one without having another lined up. Which made me really confused and hesitated as to what should I do. I will probably always have worrying feeling whether she will cheat on me or not or maybe go back to her previous boyfriend, because this is my first LTR it could really mess me up.

 

[Ralph33]

I don't believe every situation is black or white. It's called taking a risk, my friend.

Where the girl that had a boyfriend were honest with you that they in fact had a boyfriend and didn't try to hide it like this woman?

 

[jaymbrs]

Where the girl that had a boyfriend were honest with you that they in fact had a boyfriend and didn't try to hide it like this woman?

Yea for the most part they didn't hide the fact they had boyfriends. Some underplayed them as just seeing them. But that's only because they didn't want to come off as wrong.