The dreaded question of "What do you do?"

[Toddz]

I tell them that I save lives for a living.

And I literally do save lives for a living or do my best trying to, as an ER Nurse.

Find a career that is interesting and that you love, and you won't have to dread answering this question.

 

[Glassguy]

I think that "What do you do" is just a standard question. There is absolutely NO reason to get all macho worked up about it. You have to realize that if the woman is asking questions, she is interested to some extent, which is a good thing.

There is no reason to be dishonest as if you start seeing her, she will eventually find out and make a liar out of you for being dishonest.

I dont care if you are a hedge fund broker or sweep up the McDonald's parking lot. Be confident and own it and if she has true interest it wont be a problem.

Her: What do you do?
Me: I own an auto, commercial and residential glass company. On the side I like to cut loose, hang out and have fun. What about you?
Her: blah blah blah

Its really no big deal.

The other end of the spectrum is-
Her: What do you do?
You: I work a crappy job at blah blah and hate it. Hopefully I can find something better eventually but I hate it and I am so unhappy.
Her: Silence......

Make it no big deal and be confident in whatever it is you do and it shouldnt be a problem.

 

[The Duke]

I think some of you have a hard time relating to those who do have a job that puts you in a stereotypical box that happens to have negative connotations.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/...-pilot-model-physical-therapist-a6895301.html

The top 5 most right swiped male jobs on Tinder are:

1. Pilot (The number of FAA certified pilots in the USA in 2014 was 593,499 which makes up .002% of the population.) So if there are so few pilots, how come they are so popular on Tinder? Hmmm, let that set it for a while. It speaks volumes for how much importance women put on job titles. Men with pilot jobs have lots of sex appeal. I'm friends with a pilot. He is 61yo, out of shape and has a 45yo gf that is a former magazine print model. Dude has never been married and always had plenty of women. Most he meets at the airports operates out of. Its all about status. Urbanyst tried to tell you guys stuff like this matters.

2. Founder/Entrepreneur

3. Firefighter

4. Doctor

5. TV/Radio Personality

I am not surprised at all that Pilot, Firefighter, and Doctor are in the top 5. If you don't think the type of job you have is important to women, you need to be a fly on the wall when they get in their women only groups and talk about guys.

 

[The Duke]

I tell them that I save lives for a living.

And I literally do save lives for a living or do my best trying to, as an ER Nurse.

Find a career that is interesting and that you love, and you won't have to dread answering this question.

Its not about dreading your job. Its how you get treated because of your job. Many times you get judged instantly and put in a box. Tell a girl you are a pilot or a doctor and her panties get wet instantly and she is super interested. Tell her you are an accountant or a scientist and she loses interest instantly. I've experimented with all sorts of job titles when I approach women. Its hilarious what they fall for.

To illustrate my point even further @BeExcellent has told us the job titles of every guy she has been with! lol. We know very little about what these guys look like, but we know what type of work they do. She places importance on what they do. Even when she talks about her male family members she mentions job type.

A nurse is typically a job that females usually do. Its only in recent years we have seen a rise in males becoming nurses. Do you ever
encounter any judgement for being a MALE nurse when hitting on a female? How many females do you approach in a week? Why do you feel the need to tell them that you "save lives for a living". Why put a "spin" on what you really do? You want them to think you are a doctor? You don't want them to know you are a MALE nurse?

 

[Murk]

Nah, what you do for employment is only going to affect how a girls thinks of you if your personality isn't strong enough to convey your essence. It's like a guy who wears nice clothes but doesn't stand confidently and lets the clothes wear him. Take ownership of how you carry yourself and the way others perceive you.

 

[The Duke]

I have another thought about this:

When a woman tells her female friends that she met a guy, the first question her female friends usually ask is, "What does he do?"

When a guy tells his male friends that he met a girl, the first question his male friends usually ask is, "What does she look like?"

This is very true. Seen it hundreds of times.

 

[The Duke]

Nah, what you do for employment is only going to affect how a girls thinks of you if your personality isn't strong enough to convey your essence. It's like a guy who wears nice clothes but doesn't stand confidently and lets the clothes wear him. Take ownership of how you carry yourself and the way others perceive you.

when you can offer me real world experiences to back your claim up I will give you some credit. Until then its an opinion based on nothing but what you "feel" is true. You can stand strong and tall all day long, but you can't change perceptions of how someone might feel about your job title. Those perceptions are usually already burned into their brain, just like your thoughts on this subject.

Start telling girls you are a scientist or computer programmer or a executive assistant(secretary) and see how fast you get blown out.

Its no different than how most feel about a girl as soon as you find out she is a STRIPPER or Lobbyist for Female Rights or a Vice President of a Corporation!

 

[Murk]

when you can offer me real world experiences to back your claim up I will give you some credit. Until then its an opinion based on nothing but what you "feel" is true. You can stand strong and tall all day long, but you can't change perceptions of how someone might feel about your job title. Those perceptions are usually already burned into their brain, just like your thoughts on this subject.

Start telling girls you are a scientist or computer programmer or a executive assistant(secretary) and see how fast you get blown out.

Its no different than how most feel about a girl as soon as you find out she is a STRIPPER or Lobbyist for Female Rights or a Vice President of a Corporation!

You think a girl is going to blow out a guy who is attractive and confident when he says he's a computer programmer? You're a a hypocrite, stuck in your ways, don't play passive aggressive. My real life experience is me and my friends (from all walks of life, even unemployed), multiple approaches over the last decade, talking to girls, being asked what we do - by that point it has NO relevance because we have already made a strong imprint.

Do you really think a girl will think you're a nerd, if you approach and chat to her with confidence and not like a nerd? I think your problem is that you are exactly like the stereotype of your job. In that case no, I have no experience there.

 

[zekko]

I still say even a guy is going to ask you this question first. It's literally the most basic question you can ask. It's social skills 101.

 

[VladPatton]

Do what you wanna do with exactly zero phucks in your gas tank.

 

[zekko]

Agree with @zekko and @RangerMIkeLike Zekko my guy has passive income & doesn't work. He tells women with a straight face that he is "unemployed."

Ha, I've used that line too. I went through a phase where I was telling everyone that, just because it amused me.
People have asked me how I was able to retire so young. I don't like to get too specific for privacy reasons, but generally they talk about your retirement consisting of a three legged stool. I just made sure to set my stool up with about 11 different legs.

 

[Toddz]

Do you ever encounter any judgement for being a MALE nurse when hitting on a female? How many females do you approach in a week? Why do you feel the need to tell them that you "save lives for a living". Why put a "spin" on what you really do? You want them to think you are a doctor? You don't want them to know you are a MALE nurse?

Hmm, I seemed to have struck a nerve.

I tell every woman that asks i'm an RN, and damn proud of it. And not judged at all, quite the opposite. Women become all glassy eyed and end up asking endless questions intrigued about my job. "What's the worst thing you've ever seen?" "How do you handle seeing blood all day?" "How do you deal with patients that die?" etc, etc...

Being a nurse in the Emergency Room is an entire different ballgame than your typical nursing position. We encounter life and death everyday. So yes, I do save lives for a living. There is no spin on it. Doctor's only put in orders, while nurses are doing the grunt work. And as far as being a man in a female profession, this isn't the 1940's, I was a first responder and firefighter for 10 years before becoming a RN. What I do now is 10x times harder and more intense than what I used to do. It's not even a comparison.

 

[hitmanwalking]

I used to tell women that I teach guys how to talk to women and it always works. Even if I suck at picking them up during the interaction, it is already in their heads that I am supposed to be good. Everything I do, no matter how corny, is gold to them. They think this is the way it's "supposed to be" since I am obviously a successful Hitch. For women, status and validation is being able to get the guy that all other women want.

You can try to exploit situational status by being the alpha of a social circle, manager at a bar, modeling agent, etc. Or you can just tell women you are the head honcho Don Juan himself.

Coming from the right frame, everything you do works. The wrong frame, nothing you do works. I can't think of a higher frame than an actual Don Juan who gets paid to teach guys. Even a "doctor" frame can be exploited and used for materialistic reasons by women.

 

[flowtheory]

What a mans profession is definitely matters to women.

 

[Murk]

I still say even a guy is going to ask you this question first. It's literally the most basic question you can ask. It's social skills 101.

Exactly - some real paranoid people in this thread.

 

[The Duke]

Tell me again how the dynamic between 2 guys interacting is the same as a man and woman that might be interested in each other?

It’s not the same across the board. Completely different. Well, unless you’re gay of course. Then you might have a point

I often chat up guys when I go out and I'm certainly not gay, just enjoy meeting new people and polishing my conversational skills. I always ask what they do after I'm 5minutes into the conversation. I've even picked up side business this way.

The job question is one that most are comfortable talking about which is probably why its common.

 

[Mike32ct]

Whatever your job is, just OWN it.

We have to go with our natural talents and interests, even if it’s not the most sexy job or business.

While I understand the OP’s question, I don’t think it’s anything to worry about.

I’m an engineer. If women want to put me in the “nerd box,” I say bring it on . Who cares?

 

[flowtheory]

Whatever your job is, just OWN it

I WORK AT A GROCERY STORE PUTTING OUT FRUIT!!

WOOOOO!!

 

[The Duke]

I WORK AT A GROCERY STORE PUTTING OUT FRUIT!!

WOOOOO!!

so you get to fondle peaches all day?

 

[BeExcellent]

To illustrate my point even further @BeExcellent has told us the job titles of every guy she has been with! lol. We know very little about what these guys look like, but we know what type of work they do. She places importance on what they do. Even when she talks about her male family members she mentions job type.

Um no. Not job titles of every guy I've ever been with. Please. Dates are not the same as "been with!!"...which implies sexually. Nope. Misleading. And I HAVE explained what the "high status" dudes looked like...height, weight, body type, build, hair, etc. When people wanted me to give examples. Then I get shamed for showing off.

Ranger Mike has listed women out that he dates or sleeps with in a similar way. He notes what the women do, what they look like, and gives age and height/weight stats.

And those descriptions have always been for the purpose of helping the forum understand what high value men are (because that's what I date/LTR/etc). Which is LMS (Looks/Money/Status) + Game (aka social acumen.) So let's not grossly mis-characterize. My posts are around for the observing. So are Mike's.

What someone does sheds light/gives clues on who they are. It tells you something about how educated they are, whether they are business savvy or not, whether you have things in common, if they have discipline, if they possess intelligence, what they are interested in. Are the self oriented? Service oriented? Cause oriented? It shows you some of their character. To me character is of great importance.

And as a highly accomplished well off individual myself? You are dam straight I'm not going to go out with somebody who doesn't have the intellect or the life experience or character to interest me. I don't want to date a man who I think I know more than or who I think I have to lead, or somebody who doesn't have his act together AT LEAST to the degree I do. I don't care if the man looks likes George Clooney or Johnny Depp (both of whom are HOT in my book), a beautiful man who is not on my level...is not on my level. And I won't entertain such a man. Why? I'm not after only sex, and sex appeal is not the whole enchilada.

I think Howie is flirting in his own way.