How would you of handled this?

The Duke

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I had been out with this girl a few times before Christmas. Already had sex. We made plans to go out New Years eve. I was supposed to be at her house at 7:00-7:30 and we would leave from there. I showed up close to 7 and she answers the door in her bath robe. She had just started a bath and was no where close to being ready.

I waited patiently for 2hrs with no attitude although I voiced my displeasure. At the 2.5hr mark I got up and told her she could meet me there and I left. And it was hard to do, she was looking super hot. She tried to tell me she was making herself look good for me, I told her she was full of schitt she was doing so for validation just like every girl does. o_O

Now I was the biggest azzhole on the planet. I got a slew of angry texts and she never showed up.

I ended up hanging out by myself at the bar for a while, hit on a waitress, and then hung out with some friends that showed up so the evening was still good. Only thing I lost out on was sex.

How would you of handled this situation? She was probably 15minutes away from being ready. But my patience was long gone.
 

Macaframalama

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Told her to go no further, than the bath robe and if she insisted, something preferably see through and easy to peel off, while you're out grabbing drinks and order takeout.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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Answered door in bathrobe; you completely missed the point. She probably waited the first hour for you to make your move. Then realised you were not understanding the situation, then started getting ready to go out.

If a girl does this all the time, fine, just move along. But NYE.... Come on. Everyone makes a special effort. From the info provided, I'd say this was handed badly.

In 2018, many of you lads need to finally get over your emotional issues with women. With due respect, this sounds like a complete misinterpretation and over reaction on your part, especially with a bird you hardly know.
 

AttackFormation

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I had been out with this girl a few times before Christmas. Already had sex. We made plans to go out New Years eve. I was supposed to be at her house at 7:00-7:30 and we would leave from there. I showed up close to 7 and she answers the door in her bath robe. She had just started a bath and was no where close to being ready.

I waited patiently for 2hrs with no attitude although I voiced my displeasure. At the 2.5hr mark I got up and told her she could meet me there and I left. And it was hard to do, she was looking super hot. She tried to tell me she was making herself look good for me, I told her she was full of schitt she was doing so for validation just like every girl does. o_O

Now I was the biggest azzhole on the planet. I got a slew of angry texts and she never showed up.

I ended up hanging out by myself at the bar for a while, hit on a waitress, and then hung out with some friends that showed up so the evening was still good. Only thing I lost out on was sex.

How would you of handled this situation? She was probably 15minutes away from being ready. But my patience was long gone.
You fvcked up big.

From your response to her, it sounds like you have done a common mistake, which is to take too much malignant "red pill" writing to heart. Same thing was happening to me before I took a break from it all. You become like the male equivalent of a feminist, feeling only negativity, hostility and distrust. It would've been one thing if she blatantly didn't care about meeting you anywhere close to on time at some place you were going to, but you were supposed to show up at her house. That's the first clue, and then she answers the door in her bathrobe. She may as well have answered the door with a sign asking you to fvck her before you go out. Keep in mind too that she's a (hot) woman, you're not with her in the first place to play board games with her, right? she knows this too. You honestly come off as a bitter, limp-d1cked old man in this post, and I say that only to help slap you into the right gear that you surely are in usually.

I would've smiled, grabbed her and started making out when she answered in her bathrobe. When she gets hot and bothered I would've told her to go finish her bath. Then I would've gone to relax in her sofa until she's done bathing, after which I would've started escalating when she gets dressed.

It sounds like you can still recover this, if you play your cards well enough and take a step back from your current perspective mentally.
 

sazc

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Answered the door in her bathrobe.... Early enough for a shag, a shower, and then to go out.

You misread the entire situation.

& You actually said that to her?!?!

Def too much red pill, as @AttackFormation mentioned

You guys build each other up to have a singular view of ALL females. It will backfire
 

AttackFormation

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Def too much red pill, as @AttackFormation mentioned

You guys build each other up to have a singular view of ALL females. It will backfire
The worst enemy of knowledge is not unknowing, but in thinking that you know... that's what happens when guys spend too much time on boards like this and reading garbage sites like return of kings. They forget that the purpose of this is to create positivity for themselves and others. It shifts their perspective to start interpreting things as negatively as possible "informed" by a skewed, destructive personal and world view, and they become their own worst enemy, just like bitter feminists.

I think too many guys forget that the writers here and at other places have no personal stake in what happens in guys' lives. You have to think about what kind of thoughts you're absorbing and making a part of your mind, because they're free to attempt to make you feel and think whatever they like.

Mentally, there is no enemy except the one you create. Women are not the enemy. It's all about the reality you create in your mind...
 
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TheMonkeyKing

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build each other up to have a singular view of ALL females. It will backfire
Pretty much summarises everything I tried to explain herein last year.

The worst enemy of knowledge is not unknowing, but in thinking that you know...
We might say that there are two types of knowledge here: there's knowledge that directly facilitates action (a girl greeting you in a bathrobe); and knowledge that needs no action, but simply provides understanding of the world.

The primary error here was that knowledge better applied for understanding was employed directly for action.

Why any man would maliciously rant about the female imperative to a woman's face like this is completely beyond me; particularly under the circumstance described. Literally shaking my head.
 

The Duke

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I made advances on her while she was in her bath robe getting ready. I fingered her a little, but she wasn't down for much at all and insisted on getting ready. So go fish! lol

And at one point I left to grab some food and brought her back some.

Sounds like to me that you guys would sit around for 2.5hrs just to guarantee pu$$y? Do you not value your time?
 

sazc

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Missed opportunity one, the bathrobe.

Missed opportunity two, being normal and saying "im really not a man who appreciates being kept waiting like this, is this how you generally are?" And letting that conversation happen..... Like normal people who know how to communicate what is on their mind.

He wanted to her about how "all" females are because he wanted her to understand that he was an alpha top dog that would take no sh1t. He got labeled an a$$hole by her and she's telling everyone what happened.

Im not saying she was right to keep him waiting, tho I believe he really missed overt signs for sex, but, unlike what it's broadcasted here, not every female lives her life intentionally trying to mindfvck and manipulate men.

SMH
 

The Duke

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Go re-read Sazc, maybe try it sllllllloooooooooooooowwwwwerrrrrrrrr this time, I did try to have sex with her and stated that above. I did voice my displeasure and stated so in the opening post!
 

Macaframalama

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I made advances on her while she was in her bath robe getting ready. I fingered her a little, but she wasn't down for much at all and insisted on getting ready. So go fish! lol

And at one point I left to grab some food and brought her back some.

Sounds like to me that you guys would sit around for 2.5hrs just to guarantee pu$$y? Do you not value your time?
And you thought to only mention this until now? Yea right. Convenient. You're trying to save face at this point. And who goes out to party before 9p.m.?
 

sazc

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Haha, I was posting when you were telling everyone you tried to get it on.

Yea, after telling her she was an attention seeker "like every other female is" I can only imagine how you handled telling her of your displeasure for keeping you waiting.....

Still, if all that went down the way you said it did, food, etc, she was in the wrong. Best thing to do is move on and figure out how you are going to handle this if it come up again with another chick.
 

marmel75

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I cannot believe you are this clueless..she wanted you to rail her six ways to Sunday or possibly hop in the shower with her and you sit there like a fvcking idiot complaining she isnt ready...lmao...

But let me guess...you felt "Alpha as fvck" right?

Then dudes wonder what they did wrong and why chicks wont return their messages, lmao...unbelievable :confused::confused:o_O
 

The Duke

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@marmel75 No, she didn't want sex. I tried 10 minutes after I got there while she was getting ready. She wasn't interested.

She didn't take a shower, she took a quick bath.

After 2hrs of waiting yeah I felt disrespected. I got better schitt to do than wait on some chic. nothing about being alpha. Its about what was right for me, I live life on my terms, my schedule.
 

AttackFormation

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@marmel75 No, she didn't want sex. I tried 10 minutes after I got there while she was getting ready. She wasn't interested.

After 2hrs of waiting yeah I felt disrespected. I got better schitt to do than wait on some chic. nothing about being alpha. Its about what was right for me, I live life on my terms, my schedule.
If that's true and you didn't do something to turn her off you've still not got your back free. It's not that you felt disrespected and did something about it, but the manner in which you did so and what it says about your current mentality. I wasn't even going to talk about what actually happened in my first reply because whether she wanted sex or not is less important than how you can grow from this.
 

sazc

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Further this idea of "dj", IMO a true man knows how to exit a situation without causing the female to get nasty. A man wants to maintain frame of the entire situation. "Lead"

A woman blowing up your phone needing to tell you what am a$$hole you were probably means you could have handled it better, definitely handled it more smoothly.
 

sazc

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In my opinion I wait 20 minutes MAX then leave. In my experience this is MUCH more effective than voicing displeasure.

The longer you're willing to wait, the less respect they have for you.
I agree but I don't think leaving unannounced is the way to go. That would have get blowing up your phone calling you an a$$hole too.

I don't think it's unreasonable to say " I'll wait 20 mins & then you can meet me there"

Then again, I'd never expect my date to be waiting for me for more then 20 mins, that's ride. If that's going to occur he needs to know as early as possible.
 

sazc

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Respectfully disagree.

Any kind of emotion evoked by a man to a woman is a GOOD thing.

Abruptly/tersely/non-graciously walking away is sure to sometimes p1ss them off but they WILL respect a man who is willing to lose them/incur dissapproval.
Im super confused at this rhetoric that is constantly spewed. The advice is given to evoke emotions for the push pull but then zero responsibility is taken by forum members when the emotions being evoked are considered "crazy" or "BPD" - and this is AFTER the decision is made to evoke emotion!

Not to mention, why would you want to evoke emotion other then to test for sanity/her ability to be reasonable...?

I just think the man maintaining control of the situation - to me, that's attractive. He doesn't lose his cool, he knows how to talk about "it".

I agree - it's attractive when a man has standards and isn't afraid to lose you by sticking to them. It gives both parties clear lines of understanding who the other person is, which is important when it comes to compatibility.

I think more members would do well heading this advice BUT then they wouldn't get laid as much... So there is the rub (pun intended)
 
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