at what point with a woman can u just lay back and trust her and commit to a healthy loving lasting relationship?
OK. Let's look at the exact terminology you're employing here.....
lay back and trust her
My friend, one simply doesn't 'lay back and trust' people. Not even necessarily your own blood family, in some cases. Time and life change people. Women especially fluctuate weekly, almost daily with their world views, emotions, needs and desires. If you think even after 20 years of marriage you can relax and 'trust' a person not to necessarily turn round and sh!t all over that relationship, you're living in fantasy land. The only way you will ever guarantee it is if you date / marry a 3/10.
healthy loving lasting
I've just spat my coffee out reading your other thread about jumping in to an 'exclusive' relationship with cruise ship girl..... my man, you clearly understand nothing about relationships outside of romantic comedies and cartoon fairy tales.
If you really want '
healthy, loving and lasting', you really need to do a whole bunch of research and field testing to gain an understanding of what those things actually mean in the real world. In your particular case, I think you're going to be looking at a couple of years of development, opposed to weeks and months if this is really what you're aspiring to in the long term.
I am one here who still believes that committed long term relationships are still possible. However, I have also concluded that there is a very deliberate and steadfast process that a man need to go through in order to realise that objective. The essential, and I mean
essential steps are as follows:
Number One
Learn how to be more rational and less emotional in your decision-making processes. Learn what it means to be in charge of your own life and relationships and not having to rely on other people and their opinions of you for your self worth.
Pre-Screening
-Before you even start, determine and understand what your personal standards are as far as a woman's behaviour are concerned. Do you accept her talking to other men? Do you tolerate lateness? Can you put up with a girl who is untidy or has tattoos. Will you get nervous if she goes out drinking with her girlfriends?
Screening
-A period of AT LEAST six months where by you are banging / dating a girl and you are monitoring her behaviour against the standards you derived in pre-screening.
Spinning plates
-Plate spinning, long and short, in this context, is a process of screening multiple women at once. As far as having girlfriends go at this stage, one is too close to none.
Women must initiate the exclusivity conversation, not men
-You can do a bit of homework for yourself as to why this is the case.
Monitoring
-Just because you are 'exclusive', doesn't necessarily mean are going to live happily ever after. Not to Your girlfriend or wife anyway. This is where we return to the conversation about trust. She must keep adhering to your standards, just as in the screening phase.
-The easiest way to maintain a woman's interest is to understand her needs and make sure she is investing in yours. Keep dating your woman / women, forever. And treat each date as a first date.
