When women stay single too long

Urbanyst

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What happens when a woman stays single past 40?

For your reading pleasure:

I'm 42 going to be 43 in a few months. I'm a woman, I've never been married, never had kids. Why? There are a million reasons why which many have discussed here on this and other forums. But I am starting to encounter a certain hostility from others when they learn this about me.

Granted, I have met many people in my life. I've dated a lot of guys, I've had a very exciting life but it's been a struggle like everything else. I'm starting to encounter something from people when they hear that I am the age I am and have never been married and/or had kids. They tell me they think there is something wrong with me or I must have a caustic personality, etc. I do not react with anger when I hear these things. If anything I feel another inner lancing to myself which causes me to withdraw even more from others. Then again, most of the people who have said things like this to me have not had a picture perfect life either. If anything I am in the green when many of them have been in bad relationships, divorces, kids won't talk to them, etc. One said whatever you do, don't get married it's horrible, that guy (whoever he is or is not) will ruin your life, etc.

Is this the grass being greener situation? I would never call someone an old maid or a closet case if I found out they had never been married and/or had kids. I think that's ignorant to do so, and I refuse to do it.
 

Von

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Why would à woman need à guy?
 

Desdinova

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What happens when a woman stays single past 40?
She starts to get bored of the carousel. At that point, the good men don't want her because she's too old and ugly. She also still has problems pair-bonding because she's jaded and still misses those early encounters when she was young. The only time she gets a second chance at "love" is after she hits menopause.
 

Urbanyst

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She starts to get bored of the carousel. At that point, the good men don't want her because she's too old and ugly. She also still has problems pair-bonding because she's jaded and still misses those early encounters when she was young. The only time she gets a second chance at "love" is after she hits menopause.
God help those poor souls.. lol.
 

The Duke

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I have a male friend that is 45, never married, and no kids. He gets these same questions from women.
 

Urbanyst

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Another one:

As I am entering late 30s and observing the limited options that are left over in terms of single men, I truly can't see myself ever finding someone I will be happy with. It's just not going to happen.

What worries me the most, as I enter old age is the lack of people that genuinely care about me and that I can count on in case of emergencies. I have my family (well only my parents really) but they live in another state and they won't be around forever. I have 1 close friend that lives in another country. Other than that, I have a ton of acquaintance type of people in my life, none that I would be comfortable in calling.

When everything is going well, I love my life. People tend to love being around you when things are fun. It's when things go wrong that I feel most alone. I recently had a stroke of bad lack, had to go to ED and was in hospital overnight. In the city where I lived for about 3 years now, I didn't have a single person that I felt comfortable calling. When asked who will come to pick me up, I had to say "an uber". It's tough. Even when I have a flu, I have to drag myself to the pharmacy with high fever and go to the doctor by myself. I have to fix everything around the house by myself, I have to carry/move heavy furniture by myself. It's so HARD and it sometimes gets me down.

I had ex boyfriends help me move couple of times before but they only did it because they secretly hoped we would get back together or at least sleep together. I felt bad for leading them on but I really needed the help.

What happens if I get struck with chronic illness and am no longer able to do all the running around by myself? I have no idea.
 

sosousage

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Another one:

As I am entering late 30s and observing the limited options that are left over in terms of single men, I truly can't see myself ever finding someone I will be happy with. It's just not going to happen.

What worries me the most, as I enter old age is the lack of people that genuinely care about me and that I can count on in case of emergencies. I have my family (well only my parents really) but they live in another state and they won't be around forever. I have 1 close friend that lives in another country. Other than that, I have a ton of acquaintance type of people in my life, none that I would be comfortable in calling.

When everything is going well, I love my life. People tend to love being around you when things are fun. It's when things go wrong that I feel most alone. I recently had a stroke of bad lack, had to go to ED and was in hospital overnight. In the city where I lived for about 3 years now, I didn't have a single person that I felt comfortable calling. When asked who will come to pick me up, I had to say "an uber". It's tough. Even when I have a flu, I have to drag myself to the pharmacy with high fever and go to the doctor by myself. I have to fix everything around the house by myself, I have to carry/move heavy furniture by myself. It's so HARD and it sometimes gets me down.

I had ex boyfriends help me move couple of times before but they only did it because they secretly hoped we would get back together or at least sleep together. I felt bad for leading them on but I really needed the help.

What happens if I get struck with chronic illness and am no longer able to do all the running around by myself? I have no idea.

im sorry but inviting exes to your home to help you carry furniture means sex
 

Julian

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There is alot of psychological issues with women like this. I say fuk them. They had their chance and they blew it.

Also, i dont think posting these dear diarys from women is really what this forum is about.
 

BetterCallSaul

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I've plucked the key phrase from these posts:

"I've had a very exciting life..."

Oh no doubt sweetie. You rode that carousel good and hard when you were younger and THAT was your life. Now you whine and lament that you have no one you can call up just for help with small tasks or even just to talk to except guys secretly hoping to get in your pants.

Whose fault is this? Yeah that question never got answered.
 

Urbanyst

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Also, i dont think posting these dear diarys from women is really what this forum is about.
This forum is for discussion about the topics of women, sex and dating. This meets the criteria.

Don't like the topic? There are hundreds of other threads you can participate in lol.
 

nismo-4

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I've plucked the key phrase from these posts:

"I've had a very exciting life..."

Oh no doubt sweetie. You rode that carousel good and hard when you were younger and THAT was your life. Now you whine and lament that you have no one you can call up just for help with small tasks or even just to talk to except guys secretly hoping to get in your pants.

Whose fault is this? Yeah that question never got answered.
Of course because guys don't want to be just friends with women. Or just beta bucks. Or second place.

Men know that sex=results and women equate validation/attention as results.

Explain in terse terms that if she isn't going out, she's deleted. Sh*t or get off the goddamn pot. None of this grey-area leading on bullsh*t.
 

sosousage

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Of course because guys don't want to be just friends with women. Or just beta bucks. Or second place.

Men know that sex=results and women equate validation/attention as results.

Explain in terse terms that if she isn't going out, she's deleted. Sh*t or get off the goddamn pot. None of this grey-area leading on bullsh*t.

Sex is good for both parties
 
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