I had the same problem I couldn't believe how vindictive she could be, wow I was so kind and caring to her and she wanted to see me pay for what she said I hurt her deeply.
BPD's can control their behavior…they choose not to
- Thread starter Pandora
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You should see the **** my ex pulled after the breakup. A month after, she texts me she has a new boyfriend. Picking up my son next, she acted drunk from love making sure I saw how euphoric she was. Staging of his belongings right inside the porch door, to make sure I see he spends time there. Asking me if I could pick my son up at his house and not to worry because he was at work. Updating her profile pic on facebook to a picture of them looking in love and laughing the very same day I told her I wanted the handover to be as short as possible. Trying to triangulate by stalling me outside her house when picking up my son, with him inside painting, just so she can gauge if she had her hooks in him deep enough. Oh yeah the attempt at demasculine me by offering me her new boyfriend to fix my car.
Vindictive b1tch. I may have left her but I'm not cold hearted.
Yep. Your closest friend one minute, screaming at u like a psycho the next. Ignore u for the day or 2 then come back as the normal close loving gf then next, being kind and apologising like " how can u not want to be w me as i love u so much ,i just have problems with stress, i dont handle things like u"....... then i buy it like a dumbazz
Typical cruel treatment.
Luckily i have no kids with the cvnt.
And she knows not to parade another guy in front of me, she knows that wont go well for anyone.
Its rough as your brain has so much difficulty processing what is happening and why.
Like a mindfvck, that is so unnatural that u become fvcked up.from it.
Serotonin levels become fvcked and your neurotransmitters are off making u feel crazy
What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.
You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
Interesting thread
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when I was 23. I imagine at times where I would be if I went through life undiagnosed
Especially drug addicts the first thing I do is take them to a mental health facility.
After 11 years a shrink twice a month and Lexapro and I'm quite normal
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when I was 23. I imagine at times where I would be if I went through life undiagnosed
Especially drug addicts the first thing I do is take them to a mental health facility.
After 11 years a shrink twice a month and Lexapro and I'm quite normal
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
Hold on lol
When we say bpd are we saying bi polar or borderline personality lol I could have given insight on borderline personality years ago lol
True borderline personality is easy to spot. They love risky behavior like I don't know.. foursomes lol or gambling lol. They almost always abuse drugs or have a drug history. They also have abondobnment issues.
1% of the population has borderline personality disorder. Some of the women are just crazy
When we say bpd are we saying bi polar or borderline personality lol I could have given insight on borderline personality years ago lol
True borderline personality is easy to spot. They love risky behavior like I don't know.. foursomes lol or gambling lol. They almost always abuse drugs or have a drug history. They also have abondobnment issues.
1% of the population has borderline personality disorder. Some of the women are just crazy
Cluster b has cross over symptoms.
Mine was for sure npd and diagnosed bipolar tho REFUSED to belive 2 diff psych diagnosis by diff psychs
noBSgames
Senior Don Juan
For here we are talking about BPD borderline personality disorder.. when my ex saw I was asking around on sites (one of them I had to change my user name because she was stalking) she always brought it up in my face.. she blamed me for spending $180 at betterhealth.com for them only to say she does not have BPD... wtf you don't ask online you seek help in person.. but whatever..
This morning I woke up with a email from youtuube saying she has subscribed to me.. you already know where this is going..
I always say man I wish I could clone her but leave the BPD out
This morning I woke up with a email from youtuube saying she has subscribed to me.. you already know where this is going..
I always say man I wish I could clone her but leave the BPD out
I'd like to point out, that 1%-1.5% is a bad estimate, considering most borderlines don't seek help. They don't believe there's something wrong with them. My guess it's the very low functioning ones that end up becoming a statistic. Some sites have even suggested this
There's even suggested statistics that anywhere between 25-50% female inmates has bpd
There's even suggested statistics that anywhere between 25-50% female inmates has bpd
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
stovepipe
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Maybe I missed it, but is she the mother of your child?
Her behavior is absolutely disgusting! Offering her new BF to fix your car is the ultimate form of disrespect.
Once you experience that euphoria with them, you can see that glow in their face with their new supply. My male friend has BPD and I saw that same exact glow in his face with his new GF. He is 42, but looked and acted like a child around her. I now see she has BPD or some other Cluster B disorder after chatting with her all night.
Something similar happened to my buddy. He tried to get his ex BPD back after 5 months of NC. I told him not to contact her, as he will see her true self, the cold hearted side. Well, lets just say I was spot on, as she was so cold to him he called me immediately after crying. That same night she posted a handful of pics on her FB with her new man that he later found out she was talking to while they were dating (not surprised) and also changed her profile pic of a selfie of them. He cried non stop all night in utter shock. He was so brainwashed to think he could actually get her back and that she would listen to what he had to say. Two days before she left him she asked him to get her pregnant and they were also engaged.
I'm still, after all these months, trying to wrap my head around some of her blatant disrespectful behavior. Her thinking its ok for her male friend to sleep over and get drunk with me not there. That's the kind of crap I dealt with and that brings me such great shame in myself for not leaving the countless times I tried. The triangulation she put me through was utter hell on earth. Hated her for the way she was able to suck me back into their toxic vortex after the chit she pulled. Throwing me love bombing crumbs to make me think she is still that person, begging me not to leave her, only for her abuse to get worse and worse.
Telling me to marry for the 100th time just days before she moved, when in fact she had "zero" intentions and started dating the new guy days after that.
She played me so well in the end I truly feel sick everyday for falling for it all hook line and sinker. She only kept me around to help her pack, move things and not be alone in that apt. Future faking about her and I buying a house together the following year, showing me texts of mom saying she cant wait to meet me and spend Xmas with them.
Long story short, I kept chasing her for a week after she left, taking her crumbs, then I blew up on her saying she was selfish for leading me on and giving me the silent treatment when I did nothing wrong, then her saying "shes tired of walking on eggs shells with me, better we dont date anymore" Then I found a piece of paper in my bag clothes a week later that said "I love you, try not to forget me". Thats when it hit me in the face she used me and had zero intentions of a future. I cried for weeks thinking it was all my fault. If it wasn't for her friend telling me about her past, I probably would have continued to chase her for God knows how long.
I should have never taken her back the last time I broke up with her, could have saved myself a world of extra pain/abuse and let her suffer in that apt alone thinking about what she did.
Heartless psycho.
One thing i can not tolerate would be cheating or talking to another guy. The fighter in me takes over and I'm insane with disgust. Couldnt touch a girl ever again if i wanted.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
25,% of women don't have bpd lol that's crazy to even suggest
Just cause a women is entitled and spolied doesn't mean she has a mental diease.
I would even refute the title of this the. My experience without help and meds I can't not exhibit bpd traits. I snap uncontrollably, I abuse drugs, I run people off. It's not something I can control when I feel like it. It's me.
.even with Lexapro I have foursomes smoke weed and Gamble daily tho I'm good at it so no one sees it as a problem.
Just cause a women is entitled and spolied doesn't mean she has a mental diease.
I would even refute the title of this the. My experience without help and meds I can't not exhibit bpd traits. I snap uncontrollably, I abuse drugs, I run people off. It's not something I can control when I feel like it. It's me.
.even with Lexapro I have foursomes smoke weed and Gamble daily tho I'm good at it so no one sees it as a problem.
Don't beat yourself up. These women are master manipulators and experts at finding a mark. They follow a script that works and there's no shame in falling for it. Most of us go into these relationship with open minds and hearts, because we are good people.
Yeah I fvcked up and had a kid with her. She didn't show the volatile traits usually associated with low function BPD's. which had me fooled. I contributed her antics of having being married to an abusive narcissist for 18 years. That can screw anybody up. Now I see they were a perfect match. It's only after I left I started to connect the dots and do the research. I'm not a professional psychiatrist nor am I some wounded ex trying to find excuses for heartbreak and mistreatment. She fits the waif down to a fault.
1. Extreme fear of abandonment
2. Self harming cutting her toenails until they bleed
3. Perpetual victim (Everybody has always been mean to me)
4. Distorted reality of what happens during arguments and what was being said, including imagined physical threat from me (imagining me getting very close to her face with a pointed finger) when I was across the room.
Always in denial about her involvement and the skewed manipulative ways of a master, she would argue her points so well, you'd think you were the one causing all issues. I really had to sometimes think hard of what was said and done, because they didn't match her 'facts', I thought I was getting Alzheimers
5. Telling me 'saving her' or 'picking her up' if you will was something she would always need from me.
6. all kinds of physical ailments flaring up at random times, including intestinal problems that would cause them to inflate making her look pregnant one minute and flat the other (she probably faked it). Had specialists stumped.
7. Horror stories about her ex, meant to elicit sympathy and to recruit me as capt-save-a-ho
8. Heroin addicted/prostitute mother/criminal father both ignoring her and neglecting her since birth
9. Sexually abused by a friend of the family at an early age
10. Gradually increasing my workload for the family to the point I was doing 70% of taking care of the family chores, while still complaining I didn't do enough. This was to prove my love and caring
11. Shaming/Guilting me for having my hobbies, which I let go of.
12. 15+ recycles
13. Extremely moody
14. High conflict personality. Even lost her job and had to be relocated because of conflicts.
I can keep it going but you get the point. I lost my identity and got a depression because I completely disappeared in her world. I was guilted/shamed into giving more than a human can give.
She became completely psychotic towards the end when I broke up for the last time. Banging her head against the wall, falling on her knees begging, crying and pleading, switching to all out rage of pushing me and flipping over the dinner table. Running after me screaming outside like a crazy person. She really scared the sh!t out of me.
The first month picking up and bringing my son back, she would tell me how she couldn't move her fingers in the morning from all the moving she had been doing, She would wear skirts or shorts so I could see her completely bruised legs, which she claimed was from not getting help moving and having to do it herself. Yet there was always 2 or 3 people around helping her.
I never begged her back after the last breakup. I did apologize once for how I left. I told her I didn't love her anymore and I was sick and tired of her 3 kids (not my own). Kids I had taken in as my own in that relationship. I didn't just leave, I slammed that door well and shut.
As I said I'm not qualified to give diagnosis's but I'm 1000% certain myself.
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stovepipe
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Im the same way. Thing is, 90% of her friends were males. I felt like I was competing against an army of men trying to bang my girl for two years. I became so mentally drained, confused, mad, sad and helpless almost the entire time. The friend I mentioned who slept over was a co worker she worked with for years and assured from the start he's just a friend (yeah right). Her friend also told me after it was over she never slept with him, as she would have told her.
I tried so many times to find solid proof of her physical cheating, but never did. I'm sure if I kept digging I would have, but I became so exhausted from trying and became afraid of getting caught. While she did cheat emotionally many times, that alone should have been enough for me walk away for good. The night her male friend slept over, which was more than twice mind you, the next day when I yelled at her about it, she automatically said "he slept on the couch". I knew it was lie, but she kept gas lighting me to believe her BS. Any sane man would have walked away. This male friend of hers was my nightmare from the get go. I met him a few times, never felt threaten by him. I drove to her work at 4am one night and caught them drinking at her bar when she said there was a maintenance man fixing the fridge.
Looking back, I must have been the weakest pu$$y in both their eyes, knowing she is giving him her time, lying about where she is, lying about her smoking and drinking, and that must of felt superior to me cause of it. Part of me wanted to break his face, but knew if I did, I probably would have killed him. Her friend told me my ex has a way of manipulating men to believe I probably said it ok for them to hang out. This whole situation has been the most gut wrenching, heart break and painful experience of my entire life, that feels like Im actually going to drop dead from the stress it continues to cause my mind.
Being my STD didn't show up till a year and half in the relationship, I've wondered if she caught it from cheating. I reached out to her ex before me to see if he caught from her as well, but I doubt he will respond as its been years since thy dated. No idea why Im wasting my time trying to figure it out. Im with you, If I knew for certain she cheated, I would have never ever went back no matter how much I loved her.
It says 25-50% female "inmates" has bpd.
Maybe he is referring to women who are in prison? If thats the case, it makes the figure more believable. But in real life, no way is that figure correct.
So tell us, how is it having a kid with a BPD? Is it like they say.....a death sentence?
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If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
Inmates as in prison. Nobody can give any real estimate how many cluster b types are out there. Not only are they hard to diagnose, most don't seek treatment. You can have BPD without substance abuse/criminal tendencies/suicidal or other traits that will land you on a T's radar. If they are able to be on the spectrum where they can function and consider themselves normal, then I don't see how it can accurately be statistically measured
As for how it is having a kid with her? 3 months in and so far so good except for the occasional rubbing it in my face she has moved on to a new replacement. I'm lucky she takes high pride in being a perfect mom. I just have to not rock the boat, because she will most likely paint me black to anybody who will listen if I get on her bad side. Hence why I've told her he needs to be ready when I get there, to keep contact with her at a minimum. I gave her a BS excuse of me missing her and how hard it is to move on, to make sure I don't end up being split. I've seen her do it first hand with her ex husband, which in fairness he deserved. Worst deadbeat dad I've ever come across
stovepipe
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Usually their first set of kids are with a narc or alpha who abandons them. Then they seek a beta for support then try to trap them with another child.
Hopefully things stay cool between you two and the kid grows up with little to no drama.
A friend dated a BPD with two kids from a previous marriage. She was introducing her kids to every new man she was with. Kids started getting confused with each new man it was sad to hear the stories. The kids dad kept trying to get her back, but she kept blowing him off. He finally became so sick and tired of her reckless behavior, lies and manipulation, that he hired a lawyer and is going to drag her through hell in court. She has no money for a lawyer, so she will probably get screwed.
Looking back, thank goodness I had an abortion with her, no way in hell could I have ever survived being a parent with her. Had I gone thru with it, the pain of seeing her with countless new men, on top of my child being exposed to that, her drug and alcohol abuse would have eaten me alive down to my very core.
FUCCCKK HER.
Lying and having guys sleep over is crossing lines and unacceptable.
That is all YOU need to let go and move on.
I know it's hard but let that slvt go.
Mine was super jealous and controlling.
That was her problem among being beyond selfish, i mean beyond.
Let her GO!! Such a liar.
Dont waste any more energy searching for cheating that will just hurt you. Keep venting here but stop looking for more hurt.
Im hurting with ya, stay strong
noBSgames
Senior Don Juan
I never understood mine.. it would always be the most craziest time because night silent evening I'm home and so is she.. then I would get a text from her that she took a screen shot of some random girl on my Instagram page and she demands to know who is she.. I'm like what the hell? I'm guessing when things are too smooth they have to disrupt the flow of things.. the crazy thing was I knew she just pulled her up out of thin air because she's never posted to me nor have I ever posted to her.. Of course after that I ignored her and that pissed her off again.
