Texting (Why You Shouldn't)

[bigneil]

Wow, I just realized something.

deesade is a woman.

Who else would be so antagonistic and never let things go? Who else would fight tooth and nail a man showing photos of gorgeous young women? Who else would be so vehemently opposed to a 46 year old man dating a 21 year old woman? Who else would keep score for months and argue over terminology (you guys knew who I was talking about when I said girlfriend, see Language). Who else would refer to something so basic as the number of times per week a girl initiates as "numerology"? Who else would say a girl initiating 3-5 days per week for 17 straight weeks wasn't interested? Who else would describe a man as someone who would "totally creep you the f*ck out"? Who else would announce she is going to block a person? Who else would refuse to show any photos of their SO's? Who else would refer to her hot female cousin?

deesade is a woman.

 

[bigneil]

Who else would poo-poo EVERY male dating coach and tell us to text girls more often??

It's so obvious now. Not only the male photo avatar to mislead us, but think about it:

Dee Sade.

As in Deidre Sade

A female name, and a female singer name.

Oh deesade, you're giving me the sweetest taboo!

 

[EyeBRollin]

she was hotter than all of the other girls I knew at the time, hell, she's still top 10 out of all the girls I've ever personally known.

there's other hot girls though, so that doesn't really matter, what really matters is her DD breast size is super super rare on slim girls and I'll never ever find one like that again

So your answer is because you still put womenn on a pedestal. That's fine, mate. We can agree to disagree. This is philosophical impasse. You pedestalize women and want a trophy for everyone else. I'm good with having 12 plates buy me gifts, sucking me dry, and having more sex than I know what to do with.

 

[lizardking82]

I think the missing ingredient is abundance. If you had a billion dollars, you wouldn't care so much about the thousands of rules of investing.

The same way, if you had 5 plates that are all HB 8's and above, you wouldn't care so much about calibrating to them.

In fact, it would actually offend your ego if someone asks you what method of game you employ.

Does an HB 10 need game? Does she need to follow rules? No.

High value people break rules all the time. In fact they make the rules. The reason why you are afraid to text is because the HB 10 decided that low value guys who text her all the time are creepy.

Now, if a HIGH value guy were to text her, she'd be excited.

At the same time, the high value guy can still blow himself out.......if he has no abundance.

The law of abundance prevents you from acting needy. ABUNDANCE is the difference between pretending not to be needy and actually not being needy.

If you are a high value guy, you NEED to have social circles and extended social circles and hobbies and passions that has women in it, like an eco-system that keeps pushing out hot babes. One chick leaves, another shows up.

Being high status is not enough to make you completely unreactive and perfect with women. Only abundance and the ENTITLEMENT that comes from that abundance will make you 100% calibrated with women.

Being 100% calibrated means everything you do is perfect. There is even a beauty and an art to the way you communicate with women.

If I had 5 HB 10's, I wouldn't care about drunk texting chicks whenever I felt like it. I"VE GOT NOTHING TO LOSE!! I am entitled to do whatever the hell I want.

But if I had 1 HB 6 and I am trying to seduce abother HB 7, I would think twice about every move.

Lack of abundance = walking on eggshells, following a bunch of rules, pretending to be James Bond...and STILL getting rejected. Because your neediness is always going to show up....one way or another.

Again, instead of telling guys to stop texting, it is far more accurate to tell guys to become high value and live a lifestyle that accumulates abundance AND EVERYTHING WILL FIX ITSELF!

This is the natural way to become good with women.

Abundance leads to total outcome independence, which of course, makes women stuck in your web of seduction.

Not opposing, but I got one question: any man with abundance is able to be good with women. Any man with infinite amount of money would do good financially. Any species with infinite amounts of food would do well. Thing is, isn't a man's true backbone and character seen in situations of difficulty? Of challenge? Abundance is not infinite anyways even if you reach it. And I don't think it is the be all do all of the life to have abundance of women.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I think the missing ingredient is abundance. If you had a billion dollars, you wouldn't care so much about the thousands of rules of investing.

The same way, if you had 5 plates that are all HB 8's and above, you wouldn't care so much about calibrating to them.

In fact, it would actually offend your ego if someone asks you what method of game you employ.

Does an HB 10 need game? Does she need to follow rules? No.

High value people break rules all the time. In fact they make the rules. The reason why you are afraid to text is because the HB 10 decided that low value guys who text her all the time are creepy.

Now, if a HIGH value guy were to text her, she'd be excited.

At the same time, the high value guy can still blow himself out.......if he has no abundance.

The law of abundance prevents you from acting needy. ABUNDANCE is the difference between pretending not to be needy and actually not being needy.

If you are a high value guy, you NEED to have social circles and extended social circles and hobbies and passions that has women in it, like an eco-system that keeps pushing out hot babes. One chick leaves, another shows up.

Being high status is not enough to make you completely unreactive and perfect with women. Only abundance and the ENTITLEMENT that comes from that abundance will make you 100% calibrated with women.

Being 100% calibrated means everything you do is perfect. There is even a beauty and an art to the way you communicate with women.

If I had 5 HB 10's, I wouldn't care about drunk texting chicks whenever I felt like it. I"VE GOT NOTHING TO LOSE!! I am entitled to do whatever the hell I want.

But if I had 1 HB 6 and I am trying to seduce abother HB 7, I would think twice about every move.

Lack of abundance = walking on eggshells, following a bunch of rules, pretending to be James Bond...and STILL getting rejected. Because your neediness is always going to show up....one way or another.

Again, instead of telling guys to stop texting, it is far more accurate to tell guys to become high value and live a lifestyle that accumulates abundance AND EVERYTHING WILL FIX ITSELF!

This is the natural way to become good with women.

Abundance leads to total outcome independence, which of course, makes women stuck in your web of seduction.

No one disagrees with abundance or outcome independence. We're regurgitating talk about value, without establishing where that value comes from.

A salesmen must show value. Her perception of value comes from two simple concepts:

A) Her initial attraction to you
B) How many masculine strength qualities you have

Giving her silence increases your value. Why? Because your attention is scarce. Every time you text, you are expending that currency. Hence, why my question (which still isn't answered), what purpose are you having text conversations for other than to get a date?

 

[EyeBRollin]

The point that escapes you is that a guy who has a great social life with a lot of women (instead of wasting all your time learning game, go out, network, and accumulate abundance) does not have to worry about these things.

They aren't mutually exclusive, so leave your strawmen at the door. Abundance makes the game easier, but it doesn't afford you the ability to do apply horrible game.

I know because I once had a harem of HB 8's and up. Do you know what I did? I went BEYOND texting women. I would drunk dial women, send WALLS of texts to them on facebook, etc.

I did FAR worse than just texting. And you know what happened? Nothing. There wasn't an ounce of outcome independence in me and I never suffered from any consequences.

Good for you. It's still horrible advice for guys who are new here.

One of my plates who was a 9 even told me "This is typical behavior of guys who get all the women."

So I did the OPPOSITE of what you are trying to spew out.

When you are a real ladies man, you are entitled and break almost every rule.

Some guys even become douchebags and treat women like sh!t.

Your currency is not attention. Your currency is abundance. Just like money.

It is like you are telling guys not to go to the casinos, but if you were rich IT'S IRRELEVANT.

And YES, I DID tell guys how to accumulate that abundance...

No, this is a half-truth.

You are entiltled to break every rule if a woman has extremely high interest in you. If she's head over heels, you can do anything. Cheat, steal, rob a bank.

Abundance vs. attention one again, are not mutually exclusive. But your argument is piss poor and littered with half truths you have no other angle to go. Attention, not abundance, is currency. One can have abundance and give out attention freely or sparingly. One can still be successful without abundance if they ration their currency.

How?

A guy who spends five hours playing video games instead of answering a girls text has the same effect on her as the guy who is on a date for five hours. She doesn't know the difference.

It's a half-truth.

Attention is the currency.

 

[lizardking82]

They aren't mutually exclusive, so leave your strawmen at the door. Abundance makes the game easier, but it doesn't afford you the ability to do apply horrible game.



Good for you. It's still horrible advice for guys who are new here.



No, this is a half-truth.

You are entiltled to break every rule if a woman has extremely high interest in you. If she's head over heels, you can do anything. Cheat, steal, rob a bank.

Abundance vs. attention one again, are not mutually exclusive. But your argument is piss poor and littered with half truths you have no other angle to go. Attention, not abundance, is currency. One can have abundance and give out attention freely or sparingly. One can still be successful without abundance if they ration their currency.

How?

A guy who spends five hours playing video games instead of answering a girls text has the same effect on her as the guy who is on a date for five hours. She doesn't know the difference.

It's a half-truth.

Attention is the currency.

All due respect, man...I think he is talkin' about something real and on a whole other level here. I will at least try to apply his mindset with girls and see where it leads.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

The point that escapes you is that a guy who has a great social life with a lot of women (instead of wasting all your time learning game, go out, network, and accumulate abundance) does not have to worry about these things.

I know because I once had a harem of HB 8's and up. Do you know what I did? I went BEYOND texting women. I would drunk dial women, send WALLS of texts to them on facebook, etc.

I did FAR worse than just texting. And you know what happened? Nothing. There wasn't an ounce of outcome independence in me and I never suffered from any consequences.

One of my plates who was a 9 even told me "This is typical behavior of guys who get all the women."

So I did the OPPOSITE of what you are trying to spew out.

When you are a real ladies man, you are entitled and break almost every rule.

Some guys even become douchebags and treat women like sh!t.

Your currency is not attention. Your currency is abundance. Just like money.

It is like you are telling guys not to go to the casinos, but if you were rich IT'S IRRELEVANT.

And YES, I DID tell guys how to accumulate that abundance...


By networking, having social circles and extended circles, infiltrating circles of hot women, and developing an ECO-SYSTEM that keeps producing women.

If you were successful at this, you wouldn't need to read stupid threads like "Don't ever text women." A guy with a harem treats women as if they are his personal psychiatrist (In a sense that you talk about female problems to them. This puts you in a dominant frame because you are insinuating she is not someone you consider dating).

What is the purpose of having a bunch of women at your disposal if you can't vent your emotions and use them as emotional tampons?

Your mentality is coming from lack and scarcity. A guy with actual abundance uses women for sex and companionship. He doesn't treat them with kids gloves.

I could join all the social circles I want, but the girls DON'T LIKE ME in them.

Do you have the solution for that?

 

[EyeBRollin]

By networking, having social circles and extended circles, infiltrating circles of hot women, and developing an ECO-SYSTEM that keeps producing women.

I agree, but this has nothing to do with the topic of texting.

If you were successful at this, you wouldn't need to read stupid threads like "Don't ever text women." A guy with a harem treats women as if they are his personal psychiatrist (In a sense that you talk about female problems to them. This puts you in a dominant frame because you are insinuating she is not someone you consider dating).

What is the purpose of having a bunch of women at your disposal if you can't vent your emotions and use them as emotional tampons?

Women aren't your therapists or your mother. She doesn't give a **** about your problems. Problems are not sexy. Vulnerabilities are weakness. She'll shove them up your ass in the next argument. Make her your shrink, and you'll earn a first class ticket to divorce court.

Your mentality is coming from lack and scarcity. A guy with actual abundance uses women for sex and companionship. He doesn't treat them with kids gloves.

Riiiiiiiight. Your argument for texting is a lecture about scarcity. How ironic.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

This shows me you have no idea what confidence is, which is why you are hiding behind being a "challenge."

Showing vulnerability without a care in the world actually shows people you are confident.

Confidence is not an action. It is a lack of ego protection.

I am always showing women my vulnerabilities without a care in the world (and this makes me look supremely confident).

How can I afford to do this? Because I already have 10 other women. I couldn't less what she thinks.

Showing vulnerability is not a weakness. It is a strength.

Why do you think women reward you for putting your ego aside and approaching them in broad day light?

Any time you can make yourself vulnerable and show people you have no need to protect your ego, you look like a strong person, not a weak person.

I understand your frame now. I know why you are afraid to text women. You are a weak man pretending to be strong. And you seem to think acting strong (opening yourself up to people) is weak!

When I talk about my problems with women, I am usually talking about girl problems. It is a frame game. I am implying she isn't the one (which creates even more attraction). I think this skipped right over your head.

But it's not that easy for everyone!

If any old Joe starts crying about their problems to a woman, if she's not attracted, she will not care. If a girl is not attracted to you, she would not care if you DIED.

You say it's because you have 10 other girls, but you never said how you got those. Is it just looks? Is there anything more to it than that?

There is a very large percentage of the male population, that if they tried to get sexual with a woman, the woman would recoil in disgust. Sometimes, the girl would be disgusted if he even talked to her.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I'm sorry man but whatever you are saying just doesn't resonate with my actual real life experience. And I have experience with hundreds of women.

From my perspective, women are offended if I DON'T give them attention. I am so high status that it hurts me to break rapport.

Withholding attention only works if you have middling status and trying to CREATE ATTRACTION.

And my perspective is complete counter to that. Nothing is needed more than once phone call per week. When they want more, they blow up my phone.

But what I am telling guys is instead of creating attraction through tactics and "game" why not become successful in life, and live a great lifestyle with lots of women and AUTOMATICALLY attract women?

They aren't mutually exclusive and it was never implied that they were. You're deliberately changing the topic because you don't seem to have an answer for what purpose texting accomplishes that a face to face doesn't.

What you are saying is 100% BULLSH!T.

Women get mad at me for NOT giving them attention. It is because I am an attractive guy.

Your advice is for low value guys trying to create attraction, not for high value guys who already have attraction.

There is no difference.

That's why every single high value guy in this thread disagrees with you.

Women WANT my attention. And in order for me to seduce them, I SHOW my intentions, and figure out logistics. That has been my game since 1999. I have never had to withhold my attention whatsoever. In fact, I make women NEEDY for my attention. They feel like I am playing games if I ignore them.

That's exactly the point. So why are you texting for anything other than logistics?

 

[EyeBRollin]

You just proved my point. This whole thread is based on the premise that attraction is about tactics when my point is that attraction is about the GUY.

Another half truth. Attraction is a combination of physical preferences and tactics. Attraction can be amplified, but the guy + girl have to have the physical compatibility to start with.

If you were an attractive guy, women want your attention and feel ugly/insecure if you ignore them.

Insecurity is attraction. If a woman is comfortable, her attraction plummets.

If you were middling status and have average abundance, you might want to not be too needy with your texting.

If you were the lowest of the low, you would tell guys to stop texting.

That is why I am wondering about @EyeBRollin . What is he hiding from women that he feels that he shouldn't text at all? Is he afraid that the more women get to know him, they more they will be lose interest? To me, this is a form of insecurity. His thread is a projection of his own insecurities.

For me, I want women to get to know me. It's because I am confident that the more they find out about me, the more they will be attarcted to me.

Women get to know me in person, where there can be body language, physical interplay, and potential for sex. Texting is useless.

And there in lies the flaw in your game. The more vulnerabilities she finds, the less attracted she is to you. Sorry, pal. Opening up to women does not boost their interest level.

@RichardTheFrog There is no tactic that will work for you. Get that through your head man. Either become better looking, or make more money, or work out. Accumulate value and stop thinking these stupid PUA tricks will get you anymore.

Find a real argument instead of ad hominems.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

You just proved my point. This whole thread is based on the premise that attraction is about tactics when my point is that attraction is about the GUY.

If you were an attractive guy, women want your attention and feel ugly/insecure if you ignore them.

If you were middling status and have average abundance, you might want to not be too needy with your texting.

If you were the lowest of the low, you would tell guys to stop texting.

That is why I am wondering about @EyeBRollin . What is he hiding from women that he feels that he shouldn't text at all? Is he afraid that the more women get to know him, the more they will be lose interest? To me, this is a form of insecurity. His thread is a projection of his own insecurities.

For me, I want women to get to know me. It's because I am confident that the more they find out about me, the more they will be attarcted to me.

@RichardTheFrog There is no tactic that will work for you. Get that through your head man. Either become better looking, or make more money, or work out. Accumulate value and stop thinking these stupid PUA tricks will get you anywhere.

Would YOU date a fat chick who pushed pulled you?

And does a hot chick need to push pull you for you to be attracted to her?

Just think about that. Game is irrelevant.

I know that tactics don't work. When I was younger, I used to be an acid dealer in a college town and I had girls all over me. So much abundance that I took it for granted. Then, I got arrested and four years later, nobody is really interested.

So are you saying that:
As long as you're not hideously ugly, as long as you're a good person inside, women will like you? And this is why the more they get to know you, the more they will like you?

I would mention things like being extroverted and not being shy, but I think that in some instances, people who are quiet are quiet for a reason. Maybe there is something wrong with them internally.

In September, I am starting to flip houses. I have been researching and planning this for years and am optimistic that I will succeed. But I am not sure that getting very rich or driving a cool car will help all that much.

 

[EyeBRollin]

This shows me you have no idea what confidence is, which is why you are hiding behind being a "challenge."

Showing vulnerability without a care in the world actually shows people you are confident.

Confidence is not an action. It is a lack of ego protection.

I am always showing women my vulnerabilities without a care in the world (and this makes me look supremely confident).

How can I afford to do this? Because I already have 10 other women. I couldn't less what she thinks.

Showing vulnerability is not a weakness. It is a strength.

Vulnerability is not confidence. The two have nothing to do with each other. One can be confidently a brick wall, or confidently a cry baby. I see you've bought into the feminist propaganda that somehow society gives men brownie points for being sensitive and vulnerable. It doesn't work that way.

Vulnerability is weakness. Everyone has vulnerability. The smart man only displays vulnerability if there is a diplomatic long term strategic advantage towards doing so. In the game of love, that is seldom the case. She will use your weaknesses against you. You're naive if you think otherwise.

Why do you think women reward you for putting your ego aside and approaching them in broad day light?

Confidence is a strength quality.

Any time you can make yourself vulnerable and show people you have no need to protect your ego, you look like a strong person, not a weak person.

People don't care about your vulnerabilities. You're deluding yourself.

I understand your frame now. I know why you are afraid to text women. You are a weak man pretending to be strong. And you seem to think acting strong (opening yourself up to people) is weak!

When I talk about my problems with women, I am usually talking about girl problems. It is a frame game. I am implying she isn't the one (which creates even more attraction). It's a subtle DHV, but in my case, it's real! I have female problems! And it is impressive to women because they see me as a ladies man. I think this skipped right over your head.

Save your problems for your therapist. That is someone you should be vulnerable with. (They are a good investment).

 

[RichardTheFrog]

I never said vulnerability was confidence. I said expressing vulnerability with no fear is confidence. Confidence is lack of fear in being yourself. In a sense, showing vulnerability without fear is implying you are not really vulnerable at all! This is something that skipped right over your head. But I can understand why. You come across as very bitter, insecure, and weak.

I know people don't care about my vulnerabilties. I wasn't born yesterday. But I know people are BLOWN away at my demonic confidence when I express my "vulnerabilities" without fear.

What I am talking about is levels beyond what you are currently able to grasp. Movie stars (extremely high value people) show vulnerability all the time.

When reporters asked Leonardo Dicaprio what he did for his spare time, he answered with "I like to jump off rooftops and steal bus signs I have no life." He disqualified himself in a sense. He has no need to impress anyone.

I tell women all the time I have no game. I am not afraid to tell women ANYTHING.

It is not the vulnerability that attracts women, it is the lack of fear of 100% authentic expression..

It's called expression over impression. I don't try to impress people, I simply express myself, and people are impressed by my lack of giving a fvckness....EVEN WHEN IT COMES TO EXPRESSING MY VULNERABILTIES.

In a sense, I come across as invulnerable. It is when you act like you got something to hide that makes you look vulnerable!!

So what exactly is it that allows you to act in similar manners to Leonardo DiCaprio?

 

[EyeBRollin]

I actually LIKE talking to women.

My EGO gets boosted like 1000% when I have 5 different women texting me "What cha doin?" every single day. I love the validation.

And we get to your answer. Texting is validation for you. And you're lecturing about confidence?

I tell women all the time I have no game. I am not afraid to tell women ANYTHING.

It is not the vulnerability that attracts women, it is the lack of fear of 100% authentic expression..

Fear isn't my motivation. I could tell women anything but it is inefficient. Unlike you, I don't crave conversations with women. Women enter in my life for sex, entertainment, and potential to bear my children. Telling women everything is both unnecessary and foolish.

I find text conversations to be inefficient. I'm an engineer by trade, so my data driven experiences have found no correlation between texting and how likely a woman is to show up on the first two dates, and a negative correlation from that point on. She's either going to show up or she's not. No amount of texting will change that. Thank you for your honestly about seeking validation from women. Your point is taken, and at the end of the day we are disagreeing about tactics and philosophy.

 

[Glassguy]

The guys look is the basis for a woman's attraction.

Game, social circles, etc put it on steroids.

Unless the chick knows a guy is either mega wealthy or famous, looks alone is what gets the initial attraction. The other things determine what you can do with her attraction.

 

[devilkingx2]

So your answer is because you still put womenn on a pedestal. That's fine, mate. We can agree to disagree. This is philosophical impasse. You pedestalize women and want a trophy for everyone else. I'm good with having 12 plates buy me gifts, sucking me dry, and having more sex than I know what to do with.

you asked why I would even bother to try and get a girl who didn't give me the time of day, and I gave you the special circumstances (huge breasts on a skinny girl), my original claim was that she barely wanted to talk to me irl but over text I got her to go out with me, which flies directly in the face of your claim that you shouldn't ever text and that you can't get girls that way and that irl is always better and the only thing that counts. do you have any response?

 

[devilkingx2]

IMO, all of this back and forth about "texting doesn't work for this reason" or "Calls don't work for that reason", do this, don't do that.... it's all just a discussion about how to maneuver with women when their ILs aren't high enough.

well, there comes a point where you have so many women beating down the door to be with you, that you can filter out every woman who doesn't conform to even your strictest standards, but if you aren't yet at that point, you'll have to learn how to deal with women who aren't already high interest, because there will come a point in every man's life where he has to deal with women who are only mildly interested and they don't have a 6 girl harem to go home to if they don't get it right lol.

 

[lizardking82]

well, there comes a point where you have so many women beating down the door to be with you, that you can filter out every woman who doesn't conform to even your strictest standards, but if you aren't yet at that point, you'll have to learn how to deal with women who aren't already high interest, because there will come a point in every man's life where he has to deal with women who are only mildly interested and they don't have a 6 girl harem to go home to if they don't get it right lol.

And here's where a lot of guys get it wrong: if a woman has a mild interest level in you, don't deal with her. Work on your things, look for the next woman with high IL. That's it. But must guys simply cannot imagine staying without a plate or an orbiter LOL